Chapter 52: The day of preparation (Later half.)
“Here you go, I bought you some tea.”
“T-, thank you very much.”
“Do you know where Tosaki, uh -san, is?”
“I’ve been looking for Yui-pon too but……”
“I see. Then I’ll try looking for her too.
And so I’ve been wandering around the community center, going as far as the opposite side of the hallway, from where the no-earrings person and the others are eating their lunch, and finally I found the figure I’m searching for.
She sat on a small ledge by the window, looking down at her lunchbox on her lap.
……Why the hell is she having lunch all alone here.
With that question in mind I was about to gave her the plastic bottle, but then my hand stopped moving unintentionally.
“……Fufufu, the Onigiri-s made by Yui are all so small and so cute. Ah, this one is made to look like a puppy with seaweed, so cute! ……What do I do, I can’t put myself to eat them like this.”
What do I do now, I can’t call her at this rate……
“Wait, this is not the time to be thinking something like this. I have to eat it soon, or else there’ll be some leftovers when the break is over………… But, if they’re this cute I can’t put myself to eat them can I.”
I see, no wonder why you want to eat alone.
Well that aside what do I do. Maybe pretending to not see this might be a correct answer but……
“If you can’t eat the food then how about drinking some tea instead?”
“!?”
Since it seems like it’s going to be funny so I called her. The suspicious person that’s rubbing her cheeks against the lunchbox suddenly turns to me so fast that I afraid her neck’s going to come off or something, and stiffened in that pose.
“……”
“……”
Few seconds later, Tosaki Yui regains her usual expression and
“What’re you doing?”
She said with a cold look. Hold up that’s supposed to be my line isn’t it.
“Here, I bought some tea.”
“I didn’t ask for it.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
“I don’t need it. I’m afraid if I drink it my brain will receive a fatal damage.”
“I didn’t buy the one with poison or anything dangerous in it…… Well whatever, I’ll just place it here then.”
“I’m not going to drink it……”
Tosaki Yui steadily distances herself away from me, glaring at me like a cautious cat.
……Still hates me as much as ever, but well I’m kind of used to it now.
“Please get out of my sight your presence is unplesant.”
If you don’t want me in your sight then just stop glaring at me…… and while I’m thinking that, I sat down next to Tosaki Yui. In which she instantly bounces away from me.
“Are you not proficient enough in Japanese?”
“Well if I sit by your side then I’m not going to be in your sight anymore right.”
“You reeks so please don’t get close to me.”
“Eh, seriously? I’ve been careful about my body odor since Misaki told me about it though……”
I put my arm close to my nose and tried sniffing it but, I couldn’t smell any bad odor. Then she intentionally holds her nose.
“It reeks of an old man’s smell.”
“I’m about the same age as you though……?”
“What do you mean by that, I’ve never told you my age.”
“On that festival day, I heard it when you’re talking with Sato.”
“So you’re an eavesdropping scumbag. I’m going to report this to Misaki-chan via Yui.”
“Please don’t anything but that!”
Using Misaki is a dirty play dammit!
“Then, what are you here for? Please make it quick.”
“Well, actually I don’t really have anything to say……”
“Then please get lost already. It’s unplesant.”
“Hold up, if you want a purpose then I have one. I’m going to tell you now.”
“Didn’t you just said that you don’t have anything to say to me.”
I ignore her voice, and tried thinking up of a purpose that never existed.
……Well, there’s none.
Wait wait, since I sat here there must be a reason why came here. What is it exactly, I think it’s something really important too……
“How long are you going to stay here? I’ve said this many times already but, what I expect of you are very simple things. Do not get close to me, don’t talk to me, don’t get in my sight. Please follow these three rules.”
What the hell is she saying, is she tired?
Wait, speaking of being tired…… Ah, I remembered.
“Thanks.”
“Hah?”
Whoops that’s a blunder, there’s no context at all.
So to sums it up, ummm……
“Thanks to you, it seems like we’re going to have a very interesting puppet show or something like that…… wait, I meant it for real, if Sato and her friends are in charge then it’s going to be chaotic for sure. That’s why, thanks.”
“……I just, I’m only doing anything I can do for Yui.”
……Eh, she’s being shy?
Maybe because she’s surprisingly weak to straightforwardedly expression, the corner of her mouth is raised slightly. And as if to hides that she stuffs the small onigiri in her mouth, or rather it just relaxes her cheeks even more and have the opposite effect instead.
She clears her throat with an ahem and
“Is there anything else?”
“……Well, that’s all really.”
“Then please go somewhere else quickly already. It’s unplesant whenever you’re close to me.”
“Yeah got’cha. I’m counting on you in the afternoon too.”
“I’ll do my best even without you saying that. Please go away already.”
“Yeah yeah.”
Harsh attitude as ever, but when you get used to it it’s not so harsh anymore. I don’t know if it’s because I have a strange sexual preferences, or because I’ve seen her acting childishly so many times by now……
“Please don’t think about anything unnecessary and just go already.”
“How the hell did you know……”
As I thought she’s a real esper. I finally walks away while thinking that.
When I retured to the place where no-earrings person was, there was only Tec-chan sitting there alone instead. Seems like she has gone inside the hall together with the earrings person. And when I was about to ask him why, I heard the lines from the play leaked out from the hall.
“Oh man, they’re really enthusiastic aren’t they. Hahaha.”
Said Tec-chan in a good mood.
I sit on the seat opposite of him, before speaking.
“Nakura-san, has anything happened recently?”
“Good gracious, that is quite an unusual thing to ask.”
You too have an unusual way of speaking.
Wait, I think I’ve heard this way of speaking from somewhere……
“Ah, is that the Sganarelle style by any chances?”
“Well, my son really loves it.”
“Hehー, did you read the books to him?”
“No, he asked me what kind of play we’re going to do. And then, that line just happened to be on the page I opened that book on, and it is surprisingly well received.”
Tec-chan said with a happy look.
“I was very happy, getting so excited unsightly of my age…… Well I’m still troubled with changing the way of speaking sometimes though. Hahaha.”
“Is that so. That sure is a big trouble isn’t it.”
I can’t put this into words very well but, seeing Tec-chan being happy made me happy too.
Tec-chan kind of strangely distances himself from his kids. And since I’m curious about it, I asked him at the pool.
By any chances, does that action stems from something that happened between the two of them? Or that was what my arrogance self thought…… But it’s just that, I knew only one part of Tec-chan.
Just like the no-earrings person. On the day of string figure, she acts annoyingly when spoiled by her kid. I wonder if she’s going to take it seriously or not. But it’s simply just that I don’t know anything about her at all.
Just like with the earrings person.
My impression of her from the first time to now is completely different.
Just like what Kohinata-san has said.
Try to think about the circumstances of another person.
Together with applying what I’ve learned from Aniki’s shop.
Imagine yourself in that person’s place.
Surely this must be something every normal person already know since birth, however for me it’s something I never knew of.
With just these knowledges alone, it changes my world a lot. If by any chances I never learn of these, I think my impression of other parents would stay the same as when I first met them.
When I attended the parents meeting for the first time, I got mad at Sato because she’s late, and then proceeds to complain a lot.
However when Tosaki Yui first attended the parents meeting, even though Sato keeps acting like a nuisance, I didn’t feel a strong negative feelings toward her.
I guess this is what people called growth. If that’s really the case, then I’m happy.
“It’s about time already isn’t it.” (Ryuusei)
“Yes, that’s right.”
As I talked to Tec-chan, I stand up.
I’ve attended parents meeting many times already by now. And as for what I’ve done for them, well your can see it for yourself already. So useless that I just want to laugh at myself too, I guess this is just the limit of my ability. If so then at least, at least I’ll burn the image of my senpai-s into these two eyes of mine.
……Not bad at all.
As I walked to the hall, I suddenly noticed my cheeks has relaxed. Ever since I met Misaki many things has come to me successively, but never in my wildest dream that I thought there’d be a day I can think to myself this much.
No one knows what’ll happen in the future. Such a saying existed. And I fully understood that saying through this parents meeting.
Both in a good way―― and a bad way.
People who did their best are really cool.
As the afternoon’s practicing resumes, the earrings person practiced frantically.
As for Tosaki Yui she checks only on the flow of the story, seems like her objective is is only for the play to progress smoothly on that day. But since the earrings person asked her for some more practices, she ended up spending a lot of time here.
However
It is still not enough time for the fruits of her effort to bear.
“Excuse me, but it’s already time.”
“……I’m sorry, I never got it right.”
On the stage, the earrings person’s face contorted in regret.
As for what happened, it’s exactly just what they said.
“Umm, please don’t worry. I think I’ll be able to get it right by tomorrow.”
“No, please refrain yourself from overworking. If both your throat and body collapses, everything will be in vain.”
What Tosaki Yui said is correct. I understand her feeling of wanting to put in more efforts but, if you overdo it and your body broke down then there’ll be no meaning in it.
“……Yes, you’re right. But, if I’m still like this I feel bad for the children who are looking forward to the play.”
She looked downward as she said. The no-earrings person who was listening from the side, is now looking between Tosaki Yui and the earrings person alternatively, seems like she’s confused on what she should do.
And so, the no-earrings person looked toward Tosaki Yui with eyes as if asking for help. Perhaps she’s thinking that if it’s her then she might be able to do something. Actually, if that’s me I’d probably do the same too.
“Then, let’s do it like this.”
As if to calm her down, she speaks in a gentle voice with a smile.
“I’ll play in your role instead.”
I feels like time has stopped just now.
Tosaki Yui proposed that with an expression as if she’s saying that is the best method possible.
The earrings person raised her face up, looking at Tosaki Yui with a stunned expression.
“You don’t have to force yourself to act in the show. Since veryone has their own weaknesses and strengths after all. On the show day, please take care of the children together with the help of the nursery teachers.”
I clenched my fist. Clenching so hard that my veins almost popped, my nails deep into the flesh of my hand.
The earrings person put her shivering hand that’s holding the script behind her back as if to hide it from Tosaki Yui.
“What’s the matter?”
She said while keeping up her gentle expression.
I was about to butt in unconsciously, but I clench my teeth tightly instead. It’s still too early to say anything here. Maybe because I heard what the earrings person said earlier and that made me symphatize with her a little too much.
If you look at it objectively, what Tosaki Yui just said is not a wrong thing at all. In order to improve the quality of the puppet show and thus made the kids more happy, she proposed the best possible plan. It’s just that.
……That’s fair, really fair―― No, no way in hell that’s fair.
“Ummm.”
And when I was about to stand up as I can’t endure it anymore, in that moment the earrings person speaks up.
“I’m so sorry for wasting your time like this.”
……Hah?
“No not at all, it was a very meaningful time.”
“Thank you very much…… On that day, I’ll take care of the children. And umm, good luck to you.”
“Yes, you can count on me.”
“Then…… please excuse me.”
She quickly walks away, and I could only watch as her back is getting further away.”
“……Then I’ll be excusing myself too.”
And so, there’s only me and Tosaki Yui left in the hall. Tec-chan is still in the lights and sounds room too but, I think he’s probably going to come down to check on the situation soon.
As for me, I’m staring at Tosaki Yui.
She seems to have noticed my stare, she looks back at me from the stage with a puzzled expression.
“Have I said something wrong?”
“……What do you mean by that.”
“She’s now at ease. The painful feelings she had earlier, they all has had disappeared cleanly.”
“……Are you joking with me.”
“I’m not joking with you.”
And with serious eyes,
“I’ve think thoroughly about her, and decided to speaks that out.”
She said.
I’m flabbergasted. I’m sure she’s telling me the truth. She really, really thought that it’d be better for the earrings person that way. That was not related to the show’s quality or anything, she really did think about the earrings person before saying that out.
“……Hey you.”
Back then in front of the nursery school, I’ve never told her this before. At that time I want to talk with her from the same perspective. It’s the same thing right now. By hearing what she thoughts, I’ve understood.
That’s why, I can’t keep quiet about this.
“You know what, I think you’re in the wrong here.”
“……In the wrong? Me?”
I’m not the kind of person who normally say stuff like this.
But even so, this guy……
“You can’t be serious when you say she’s at ease.”
“Yes, that’s right. So why’re you so angry?”
An immediate reply. Without any hesitation, she answered so. I simply cannot believe it. To think that she can say it out like that, she’s even closer to the earrings person than me so she should’ve know her better than me. I can’t even see the earrings person’s expression under that black cloth.
Only just by listening to her voices during practices, I already understood that she give it all she has to offer.
And to top it off, the undeniable evidence of that is she herself who asks for more practices several times.
And yet, this guy……
“Don’t mess with me!!”
My shout echoes throughout the hall. The voice is a little off. But I couldn’t care less about that, I’m in a really bad mood myself.
“There are things that are okay to say and things that are not! Didn’t you see that she’s doing her best!?”
I wonder when was the last time I raised a voice this loud.
In any case I can’t restrain myself anymore.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
However she replied with unconcerned expression.
“As you can see, Kazami-san was suffering the whole time. I can say the same to you, didn’t you see that in her?”
“Same to you, you’re always with her during the practices aren’t you so why don’t you understand that she did her best.”
I replied back without a pause.
I know that I’m hot-headed, and not in a calm mood right now. That’s why I clearly feels the difference in our calmness, in which it makes me even more irritated.
“Does it look like she’s doing it unwillingly!?”
“I can’t quite comprehend what you’re saying. So what are you trying to say really?”
I said to her with anger, however she just keeps wearing her puzzled look.
……This is no good, my meaning doesn’t get through at all.
“So, are you satisfied now? I’m about to run out of time.”
……Calm down first, and think. If I just keep pressing on my meaning won’t get through. She’s very certain that she’s in the right here. And to change that thought of her is impossible. Or at least I can’t do it. Then there should be another way, a way to――
“If you don’t have anything you want to say, then I’ll be going now.”
Dammit, there’s just not enough time!
“Come!”
“What, didn’t I just said that I don’t have any more time?”
“Whatever just come with me!”
I rudely raised my voice, and so she she nodded in discontent.
The evidence is better than an argument. And if I’m correct about it, surely that earrings person is…… and If I showed that to her, surely she’ll changes her thought.
……So where’s she currently?
Blindly searching for her won’t do. The time is also limited.
“Can you please explain the situation?”
“Just shut up.”
“What are you angry about seriously……”
Tosaki Yui said as she take a glance at her wristwatch, before letting out a deep sigh. Looks like the time I can keep her with me is not very long.
……Concentrate. Surely she’s somewhere nearby.
After she went out of the hall, I heard a running-like sound. So is she still inside the community center? And if that is the case, then there’s one option left for the place she is at currently.
“This way.”
“……Only five minutes alright.”
The place where she eats her lunch.
If she’s not there then let’s give up.
While I repeatedly turn around to check whether Tosaki Yui is still following me or not, I headed toward the destination. As I get closer to that place, I got anxious thinking what if she wasn’t there. And if by chances that’s really the case, I feels like the puppet show tomorrow is going to be ruined.
……I beg you, please be there.
And so, she is――
“……”
“……”
Both me and Tosaki Yui are stunned.
And at the end of my eyesight, there’s two female figures.
“……No, it can’t be.”
“Just look at them carefully. This is what I’ve been trying to say.”
No-earrings person is patting the earrings person’s back.
As for the earrings person, she’s crying a lot.
“……”
Tosaki Yui lost her words.
She looks at the earrings person in disbelief.
“It’s exactly what you said, that person was suffering. But that is because she’s serious about it.”
“……”
No reply. She just keeps looking at the earrings person with a stunned face.
“If she is unwillingly do it, then you’d be correct. But that is not the case, you should I understand that by now. Because she’s serious about it, that’s why she practiced so hard. And you, you denied all of her efforts.”
“……But, s-she, she’s really suffering…… at that time-, she feels relieved.”
“Just shut up.”
I don’t think she’s saying that irresponsibly. I don’t know the reasons but, I think she really do have an ability that makes her able to read what a person is thinking. And she might really feels relieved at that time just like she said. However,
“With a little thinking into it, I think you should’ve known that she tried her best.”
I said in a slightly stronger tone, she jolted as her shoulders shiver.
Then, her body sways unsteadily as she holds her head, muttering deliriously.
“…………No way, that’s a lie, why.”
Her breathing becomes rougher and harder gradually. I think she’s finally realizing the meaning of what I’m trying to say but, I think this is weird. And even more so, her body is trembling.
“……Hey, are you okay?”
The moment I started getting worried and asked her, she turns on her heel and start running
“Hey!”
She won’t stop even when I called her.
I reach my hand out to the back that’s getting further away for me, however I could only see her back off.
……What the hell is this.
It’s too sudden that my head couldn’t keep up anymore.
As I turned around while being confused, the earrings person is still crying.
The seemingly good-going puppetshow, is abruptly covered in dark clouds. Everything was going well, everyone was serious about it, but with just one word and it all crumbles down revealing its fragility.
……I have to do something.
The next day.
Tosaki Yui has arrived at the coummunity center a little earlier than before together with Yui. After that she went into the hall and made Yui sits on the first row seat, before heading toward the place we held parents meeting. There’s about ten minutes until the appointed time. However, there’s no one else here.
For her, she still couldn’t believe the thing that happened yesterday.
She believes that she’s always right. Something similar has happened in the past too, so she said the same word just like last time. And when she wondered if there’ll be problems afterward, it just happens that nothing has happened at all.
Everything she had done, she handled them well. She never failed before.
When something doesn’t go well, she could always replace that person with herself and everything will go successfully.
“……It’s okay, there are no problems at all.”
The moment she muttered, a question came into her head. The word problem struck strongly inside her head. With my own words, I’ve been hurting many people, can you still say that’s not a problem?
But then again, what was the problem in the first place.
She can see the colors clearly. She’s really suffering, so with that one word she releases the pressure on her and clearly saw the colors changing. But when she saw her again, she had a color that is hard to put into words.
――With a little thinking you should’ve know that.
The words suddenly jarred into her head, as she pluck her ears.
That’s right. It’s exactly what he said. However, she can’t admit that at all costs. She feels like that if she admits it, then is not going to be herself anymore.
It’s just like that day.
Both dad and mom, when they saw me, they seems truly happy――
And before she notices it, she has been clenching her hands hard.
She knows that her hands are shaking so much so that it’s unnatural.
For some reason, she couldn’t help but feels helpless.
No way that happened, she denied it immediately.
That hasn’t changed since way before.
I’ve never failed to do anything alone in past.
It’s definitely going to go well.
I’ve not done anything wrong.
As she keeps convincing herself, her hands didn’t stop trembling.
“……Why.”
A friend of mine who would listen to any mumbling I say, I’ve already lost him more than a decade ago. A hero that’ll help me without saying anything will never appear again for the second time.
Yui bit her lips.
……To make a weak voice is not allowed. Because all the people who were important to me, they’re all gone because of me.
Inside her head, she’s telling herself tells her so. I can’t allow myself to repeat it again. Yui is the only one I won’t let anything unhappy comes to her. And to achieve that, I have to be strong.
“……Alright.”
And, just as she made up her mind―― she heard a voice.
It was a voice that she first heard several months ago, and a voice that keeps derailing her mind since.
Chapter 52: The day of preparation (Later half.)
“Here you go, I bought you some tea.”
“T-, thank you very much.”
“Do you know where Tosaki, uh -san, is?”
“I’ve been looking for Yui-pon too but……”
“I see. Then I’ll try looking for her too.
And so I’ve been wandering around the community center, going as far as the opposite side of the hallway, from where the no-earrings person and the others are eating their lunch, and finally I found the figure I’m searching for.
She sat on a small ledge by the window, looking down at her lunchbox on her lap.
……Why the hell is she having lunch all alone here.
With that question in mind I was about to gave her the plastic bottle, but then my hand stopped moving unintentionally.
“……Fufufu, the Onigiri-s made by Yui are all so small and so cute. Ah, this one is made to look like a puppy with seaweed, so cute! ……What do I do, I can’t put myself to eat them like this.”
What do I do now, I can’t call her at this rate……
“Wait, this is not the time to be thinking something like this. I have to eat it soon, or else there’ll be some leftovers when the break is over………… But, if they’re this cute I can’t put myself to eat them can I.”
I see, no wonder why you want to eat alone.
Well that aside what do I do. Maybe pretending to not see this might be a correct answer but……
“If you can’t eat the food then how about drinking some tea instead?”
“!?”
Since it seems like it’s going to be funny so I called her. The suspicious person that’s rubbing her cheeks against the lunchbox suddenly turns to me so fast that I afraid her neck’s going to come off or something, and stiffened in that pose.
“……”
“……”
Few seconds later, Tosaki Yui regains her usual expression and
“What’re you doing?”
She said with a cold look. Hold up that’s supposed to be my line isn’t it.
“Here, I bought some tea.”
“I didn’t ask for it.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
“I don’t need it. I’m afraid if I drink it my brain will receive a fatal damage.”
“I didn’t buy the one with poison or anything dangerous in it…… Well whatever, I’ll just place it here then.”
“I’m not going to drink it……”
Tosaki Yui steadily distances herself away from me, glaring at me like a cautious cat.
……Still hates me as much as ever, but well I’m kind of used to it now.
“Please get out of my sight your presence is unplesant.”
If you don’t want me in your sight then just stop glaring at me…… and while I’m thinking that, I sat down next to Tosaki Yui. In which she instantly bounces away from me.
“Are you not proficient enough in Japanese?”
“Well if I sit by your side then I’m not going to be in your sight anymore right.”
“You reeks so please don’t get close to me.”
“Eh, seriously? I’ve been careful about my body odor since Misaki told me about it though……”
I put my arm close to my nose and tried sniffing it but, I couldn’t smell any bad odor. Then she intentionally holds her nose.
“It reeks of an old man’s smell.”
“I’m about the same age as you though……?”
“What do you mean by that, I’ve never told you my age.”
“On that festival day, I heard it when you’re talking with Sato.”
“So you’re an eavesdropping scumbag. I’m going to report this to Misaki-chan via Yui.”
“Please don’t anything but that!”
Using Misaki is a dirty play dammit!
“Then, what are you here for? Please make it quick.”
“Well, actually I don’t really have anything to say……”
“Then please get lost already. It’s unplesant.”
“Hold up, if you want a purpose then I have one. I’m going to tell you now.”
“Didn’t you just said that you don’t have anything to say to me.”
I ignore her voice, and tried thinking up of a purpose that never existed.
……Well, there’s none.
Wait wait, since I sat here there must be a reason why came here. What is it exactly, I think it’s something really important too……
“How long are you going to stay here? I’ve said this many times already but, what I expect of you are very simple things. Do not get close to me, don’t talk to me, don’t get in my sight. Please follow these three rules.”
What the hell is she saying, is she tired?
Wait, speaking of being tired…… Ah, I remembered.
“Thanks.”
“Hah?”
Whoops that’s a blunder, there’s no context at all.
So to sums it up, ummm……
“Thanks to you, it seems like we’re going to have a very interesting puppet show or something like that…… wait, I meant it for real, if Sato and her friends are in charge then it’s going to be chaotic for sure. That’s why, thanks.”
“……I just, I’m only doing anything I can do for Yui.”
……Eh, she’s being shy?
Maybe because she’s surprisingly weak to straightforwardedly expression, the corner of her mouth is raised slightly. And as if to hides that she stuffs the small onigiri in her mouth, or rather it just relaxes her cheeks even more and have the opposite effect instead.
She clears her throat with an ahem and
“Is there anything else?”
“……Well, that’s all really.”
“Then please go somewhere else quickly already. It’s unplesant whenever you’re close to me.”
“Yeah got’cha. I’m counting on you in the afternoon too.”
“I’ll do my best even without you saying that. Please go away already.”
“Yeah yeah.”
Harsh attitude as ever, but when you get used to it it’s not so harsh anymore. I don’t know if it’s because I have a strange sexual preferences, or because I’ve seen her acting childishly so many times by now……
“Please don’t think about anything unnecessary and just go already.”
“How the hell did you know……”
As I thought she’s a real esper. I finally walks away while thinking that.
When I retured to the place where no-earrings person was, there was only Tec-chan sitting there alone instead. Seems like she has gone inside the hall together with the earrings person. And when I was about to ask him why, I heard the lines from the play leaked out from the hall.
“Oh man, they’re really enthusiastic aren’t they. Hahaha.”
Said Tec-chan in a good mood.
I sit on the seat opposite of him, before speaking.
“Nakura-san, has anything happened recently?”
“Good gracious, that is quite an unusual thing to ask.”
You too have an unusual way of speaking.
Wait, I think I’ve heard this way of speaking from somewhere……
“Ah, is that the Sganarelle style by any chances?”
“Well, my son really loves it.”
“Hehー, did you read the books to him?”
“No, he asked me what kind of play we’re going to do. And then, that line just happened to be on the page I opened that book on, and it is surprisingly well received.”
Tec-chan said with a happy look.
“I was very happy, getting so excited unsightly of my age…… Well I’m still troubled with changing the way of speaking sometimes though. Hahaha.”
“Is that so. That sure is a big trouble isn’t it.”
I can’t put this into words very well but, seeing Tec-chan being happy made me happy too.
Tec-chan kind of strangely distances himself from his kids. And since I’m curious about it, I asked him at the pool.
By any chances, does that action stems from something that happened between the two of them? Or that was what my arrogance self thought…… But it’s just that, I knew only one part of Tec-chan.
Just like the no-earrings person. On the day of string figure, she acts annoyingly when spoiled by her kid. I wonder if she’s going to take it seriously or not. But it’s simply just that I don’t know anything about her at all.
Just like with the earrings person.
My impression of her from the first time to now is completely different.
Just like what Kohinata-san has said.
Try to think about the circumstances of another person.
Together with applying what I’ve learned from Aniki’s shop.
Imagine yourself in that person’s place.
Surely this must be something every normal person already know since birth, however for me it’s something I never knew of.
With just these knowledges alone, it changes my world a lot. If by any chances I never learn of these, I think my impression of other parents would stay the same as when I first met them.
When I attended the parents meeting for the first time, I got mad at Sato because she’s late, and then proceeds to complain a lot.
However when Tosaki Yui first attended the parents meeting, even though Sato keeps acting like a nuisance, I didn’t feel a strong negative feelings toward her.
I guess this is what people called growth. If that’s really the case, then I’m happy.
“It’s about time already isn’t it.” (Ryuusei)
“Yes, that’s right.”
As I talked to Tec-chan, I stand up.
I’ve attended parents meeting many times already by now. And as for what I’ve done for them, well your can see it for yourself already. So useless that I just want to laugh at myself too, I guess this is just the limit of my ability. If so then at least, at least I’ll burn the image of my senpai-s into these two eyes of mine.
……Not bad at all.
As I walked to the hall, I suddenly noticed my cheeks has relaxed. Ever since I met Misaki many things has come to me successively, but never in my wildest dream that I thought there’d be a day I can think to myself this much.
No one knows what’ll happen in the future. Such a saying existed. And I fully understood that saying through this parents meeting.
Both in a good way―― and a bad way.
People who did their best are really cool.
As the afternoon’s practicing resumes, the earrings person practiced frantically.
As for Tosaki Yui she checks only on the flow of the story, seems like her objective is is only for the play to progress smoothly on that day. But since the earrings person asked her for some more practices, she ended up spending a lot of time here.
However
It is still not enough time for the fruits of her effort to bear.
“Excuse me, but it’s already time.”
“……I’m sorry, I never got it right.”
On the stage, the earrings person’s face contorted in regret.
As for what happened, it’s exactly just what they said.
“Umm, please don’t worry. I think I’ll be able to get it right by tomorrow.”
“No, please refrain yourself from overworking. If both your throat and body collapses, everything will be in vain.”
What Tosaki Yui said is correct. I understand her feeling of wanting to put in more efforts but, if you overdo it and your body broke down then there’ll be no meaning in it.
“……Yes, you’re right. But, if I’m still like this I feel bad for the children who are looking forward to the play.”
She looked downward as she said. The no-earrings person who was listening from the side, is now looking between Tosaki Yui and the earrings person alternatively, seems like she’s confused on what she should do.
And so, the no-earrings person looked toward Tosaki Yui with eyes as if asking for help. Perhaps she’s thinking that if it’s her then she might be able to do something. Actually, if that’s me I’d probably do the same too.
“Then, let’s do it like this.”
As if to calm her down, she speaks in a gentle voice with a smile.
“I’ll play in your role instead.”
I feels like time has stopped just now.
Tosaki Yui proposed that with an expression as if she’s saying that is the best method possible.
The earrings person raised her face up, looking at Tosaki Yui with a stunned expression.
“You don’t have to force yourself to act in the show. Since veryone has their own weaknesses and strengths after all. On the show day, please take care of the children together with the help of the nursery teachers.”
I clenched my fist. Clenching so hard that my veins almost popped, my nails deep into the flesh of my hand.
The earrings person put her shivering hand that’s holding the script behind her back as if to hide it from Tosaki Yui.
“What’s the matter?”
She said while keeping up her gentle expression.
I was about to butt in unconsciously, but I clench my teeth tightly instead. It’s still too early to say anything here. Maybe because I heard what the earrings person said earlier and that made me symphatize with her a little too much.
If you look at it objectively, what Tosaki Yui just said is not a wrong thing at all. In order to improve the quality of the puppet show and thus made the kids more happy, she proposed the best possible plan. It’s just that.
……That’s fair, really fair―― No, no way in hell that’s fair.
“Ummm.”
And when I was about to stand up as I can’t endure it anymore, in that moment the earrings person speaks up.
“I’m so sorry for wasting your time like this.”
……Hah?
“No not at all, it was a very meaningful time.”
“Thank you very much…… On that day, I’ll take care of the children. And umm, good luck to you.”
“Yes, you can count on me.”
“Then…… please excuse me.”
She quickly walks away, and I could only watch as her back is getting further away.”
“……Then I’ll be excusing myself too.”
And so, there’s only me and Tosaki Yui left in the hall. Tec-chan is still in the lights and sounds room too but, I think he’s probably going to come down to check on the situation soon.
As for me, I’m staring at Tosaki Yui.
She seems to have noticed my stare, she looks back at me from the stage with a puzzled expression.
“Have I said something wrong?”
“……What do you mean by that.”
“She’s now at ease. The painful feelings she had earlier, they all has had disappeared cleanly.”
“……Are you joking with me.”
“I’m not joking with you.”
And with serious eyes,
“I’ve think thoroughly about her, and decided to speaks that out.”
She said.
I’m flabbergasted. I’m sure she’s telling me the truth. She really, really thought that it’d be better for the earrings person that way. That was not related to the show’s quality or anything, she really did think about the earrings person before saying that out.
“……Hey you.”
Back then in front of the nursery school, I’ve never told her this before. At that time I want to talk with her from the same perspective. It’s the same thing right now. By hearing what she thoughts, I’ve understood.
That’s why, I can’t keep quiet about this.
“You know what, I think you’re in the wrong here.”
“……In the wrong? Me?”
I’m not the kind of person who normally say stuff like this.
But even so, this guy……
“You can’t be serious when you say she’s at ease.”
“Yes, that’s right. So why’re you so angry?”
An immediate reply. Without any hesitation, she answered so. I simply cannot believe it. To think that she can say it out like that, she’s even closer to the earrings person than me so she should’ve know her better than me. I can’t even see the earrings person’s expression under that black cloth.
Only just by listening to her voices during practices, I already understood that she give it all she has to offer.
And to top it off, the undeniable evidence of that is she herself who asks for more practices several times.
And yet, this guy……
“Don’t mess with me!!”
My shout echoes throughout the hall. The voice is a little off. But I couldn’t care less about that, I’m in a really bad mood myself.
“There are things that are okay to say and things that are not! Didn’t you see that she’s doing her best!?”
I wonder when was the last time I raised a voice this loud.
In any case I can’t restrain myself anymore.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
However she replied with unconcerned expression.
“As you can see, Kazami-san was suffering the whole time. I can say the same to you, didn’t you see that in her?”
“Same to you, you’re always with her during the practices aren’t you so why don’t you understand that she did her best.”
I replied back without a pause.
I know that I’m hot-headed, and not in a calm mood right now. That’s why I clearly feels the difference in our calmness, in which it makes me even more irritated.
“Does it look like she’s doing it unwillingly!?”
“I can’t quite comprehend what you’re saying. So what are you trying to say really?”
I said to her with anger, however she just keeps wearing her puzzled look.
……This is no good, my meaning doesn’t get through at all.
“So, are you satisfied now? I’m about to run out of time.”
……Calm down first, and think. If I just keep pressing on my meaning won’t get through. She’s very certain that she’s in the right here. And to change that thought of her is impossible. Or at least I can’t do it. Then there should be another way, a way to――
“If you don’t have anything you want to say, then I’ll be going now.”
Dammit, there’s just not enough time!
“Come!”
“What, didn’t I just said that I don’t have any more time?”
“Whatever just come with me!”
I rudely raised my voice, and so she she nodded in discontent.
The evidence is better than an argument. And if I’m correct about it, surely that earrings person is…… and If I showed that to her, surely she’ll changes her thought.
……So where’s she currently?
Blindly searching for her won’t do. The time is also limited.
“Can you please explain the situation?”
“Just shut up.”
“What are you angry about seriously……”
Tosaki Yui said as she take a glance at her wristwatch, before letting out a deep sigh. Looks like the time I can keep her with me is not very long.
……Concentrate. Surely she’s somewhere nearby.
After she went out of the hall, I heard a running-like sound. So is she still inside the community center? And if that is the case, then there’s one option left for the place she is at currently.
“This way.”
“……Only five minutes alright.”
The place where she eats her lunch.
If she’s not there then let’s give up.
While I repeatedly turn around to check whether Tosaki Yui is still following me or not, I headed toward the destination. As I get closer to that place, I got anxious thinking what if she wasn’t there. And if by chances that’s really the case, I feels like the puppet show tomorrow is going to be ruined.
……I beg you, please be there.
And so, she is――
“……”
“……”
Both me and Tosaki Yui are stunned.
And at the end of my eyesight, there’s two female figures.
“……No, it can’t be.”
“Just look at them carefully. This is what I’ve been trying to say.”
No-earrings person is patting the earrings person’s back.
As for the earrings person, she’s crying a lot.
“……”
Tosaki Yui lost her words.
She looks at the earrings person in disbelief.
“It’s exactly what you said, that person was suffering. But that is because she’s serious about it.”
“……”
No reply. She just keeps looking at the earrings person with a stunned face.
“If she is unwillingly do it, then you’d be correct. But that is not the case, you should I understand that by now. Because she’s serious about it, that’s why she practiced so hard. And you, you denied all of her efforts.”
“……But, s-she, she’s really suffering…… at that time-, she feels relieved.”
“Just shut up.”
I don’t think she’s saying that irresponsibly. I don’t know the reasons but, I think she really do have an ability that makes her able to read what a person is thinking. And she might really feels relieved at that time just like she said. However,
“With a little thinking into it, I think you should’ve known that she tried her best.”
I said in a slightly stronger tone, she jolted as her shoulders shiver.
Then, her body sways unsteadily as she holds her head, muttering deliriously.
“…………No way, that’s a lie, why.”
Her breathing becomes rougher and harder gradually. I think she’s finally realizing the meaning of what I’m trying to say but, I think this is weird. And even more so, her body is trembling.
“……Hey, are you okay?”
The moment I started getting worried and asked her, she turns on her heel and start running
“Hey!”
She won’t stop even when I called her.
I reach my hand out to the back that’s getting further away for me, however I could only see her back off.
……What the hell is this.
It’s too sudden that my head couldn’t keep up anymore.
As I turned around while being confused, the earrings person is still crying.
The seemingly good-going puppetshow, is abruptly covered in dark clouds. Everything was going well, everyone was serious about it, but with just one word and it all crumbles down revealing its fragility.
……I have to do something.
The next day.
Tosaki Yui has arrived at the coummunity center a little earlier than before together with Yui. After that she went into the hall and made Yui sits on the first row seat, before heading toward the place we held parents meeting. There’s about ten minutes until the appointed time. However, there’s no one else here.
For her, she still couldn’t believe the thing that happened yesterday.
She believes that she’s always right. Something similar has happened in the past too, so she said the same word just like last time. And when she wondered if there’ll be problems afterward, it just happens that nothing has happened at all.
Everything she had done, she handled them well. She never failed before.
When something doesn’t go well, she could always replace that person with herself and everything will go successfully.
“……It’s okay, there are no problems at all.”
The moment she muttered, a question came into her head. The word problem struck strongly inside her head. With my own words, I’ve been hurting many people, can you still say that’s not a problem?
But then again, what was the problem in the first place.
She can see the colors clearly. She’s really suffering, so with that one word she releases the pressure on her and clearly saw the colors changing. But when she saw her again, she had a color that is hard to put into words.
――With a little thinking you should’ve know that.
The words suddenly jarred into her head, as she pluck her ears.
That’s right. It’s exactly what he said. However, she can’t admit that at all costs. She feels like that if she admits it, then is not going to be herself anymore.
It’s just like that day.
Both dad and mom, when they saw me, they seems truly happy――
And before she notices it, she has been clenching her hands hard.
She knows that her hands are shaking so much so that it’s unnatural.
For some reason, she couldn’t help but feels helpless.
No way that happened, she denied it immediately.
That hasn’t changed since way before.
I’ve never failed to do anything alone in past.
It’s definitely going to go well.
I’ve not done anything wrong.
As she keeps convincing herself, her hands didn’t stop trembling.
“……Why.”
A friend of mine who would listen to any mumbling I say, I’ve already lost him more than a decade ago. A hero that’ll help me without saying anything will never appear again for the second time.
Yui bit her lips.
……To make a weak voice is not allowed. Because all the people who were important to me, they’re all gone because of me.
Inside her head, she’s telling herself tells her so. I can’t allow myself to repeat it again. Yui is the only one I won’t let anything unhappy comes to her. And to achieve that, I have to be strong.
“……Alright.”
And, just as she made up her mind―― she heard a voice.
It was a voice that she first heard several months ago, and a voice that keeps derailing her mind since.
