“Move out, Yule,” I said as I deftly avoided the charging boar. It was more massive than the stories of the capital, and the tusk alone was longer than my entire body. Blood-red fangs slid past its muzzle and gleamed out of its mouth that which was dripping with the blood of its recent kill. I felt the land shudder at its weight, and its body alone was twice the size of my lady. Its dark eyes considered us again as white smoke rushed out of its nose, and I didn’t want to think how warm its innards were. Covered in black fur, scars decked its whole body, honors of its battles against the arrogant mortals.
“I don’t want to kill this beast, Yule,” I said, but its mouth was already dripping with drool. “We can drop it in the middle of the capital and let it kill some more puny mortals.”
I never really liked killing animals for the sake of it. And never if I would save a few hundred people. I hunted for meat like every undead, and it was a necessity. Not this, because the Tusmat was a harmless boar as long as I was concerned. Killed a few mortals? I will gladly see it kill more.
“Grr,” Yule glared at me, and I sighed. Trees lined around us erratically, and its blitheness as it maneuvered through the thick woods surprised me.
“Look, boar,” I called it out, and it charged again. I almost felt the ground shake at its charge, and it knocked a well-grown tree with its tusk. Of course, after missing its mark again.
I cast weak [Gravity] around the boar, and a dark circle materialized instantly, trapping the boar within. “I just want to have an idle chat, boar. What would you do if I dropped you in the middle of the capital? I–“
Sure, I was careless. The huge tusk rammed into my neck and came out through the other end, blood spilling on my suit, on the wilted grass below, and on one raged hound. Yule charged at the beast, its pitiful body bouncing off the boar’s meaty legs that had more girth than one Garlan. It snorted coldly and tried to move its head, but I just smiled, despite this unbearable pain, and increased the intensity of [Gravity].
“If you don’t want to reason with this undead, I’ll give you a painful death.” I slammed my hand laden with [Cardina Garch] on its gigantic tusk and broke it in a single hit.
The boar went a foot deeper into the ground as I burned mana with increasing pace and removed the thick tusk out of my neck. Yule glanced at the hole in my neck and shook its head.
[Heal] followed, and I walked closer to the boar that was more than one undead below the ground. Its aggrieved cries would have attracted the entire garrison from the capital if it wasn’t for my ward. “I gave you a chance, beast,” I said and cast [Thiage] that was ten times more potent than the [Thiage] of a Cognoscente mage. Of course, that wasn’t my limit, but enough for this boar that had bored a hole in my neck. The lightning charred the beast immediately, and it collapsed to the ground without any resistance.
“Gwar Gwar Gwar!” the hound slammed its head against my legs and tried to bite my tailcoat. I kicked it into the pit, and it fell over the roasted boar.
“Grr,” it nodded at me in acknowledgment and began eating the boar.
Yule climbed out of the hole on its own after closer to a dozen minutes. I wasn’t counting, but I trusted my time-keeping skills enough to differentiate between an hour and a few minutes. It amazed me that Yule had fitted the entire meat in its tiny stomach. The pelt, however, was untouched, except for a uniform incision on the large hump of the boar, and the bones were gnawed, chewed, bitten, but not eaten. After pondering for a while, I decided to sell the pelt to any roaming mercenaries in the forest.
“Can you get that pelt, Yule?” I asked, and it shook its rosy butt at me.
I kicked it to the ditch with a smack on its head, and Yule climbed back soon by dragging the sizeable bloodless pelt with its mouth. [Thiage] might have evaporated the blood, but I wasn’t versed in enough biology to find the reason. I knew a few things about bread and yeast, probably too many, and that was good enough. The pelt was completely charred and appeared unusable at a glance, but I knew better than just to abandon it. The pelt was large enough to cover ten Garlan, so I began my hunt for mercenaries who would pay me some bread shins in exchange.
I was too hopeful about the black and charred pelt, as many just sent me off with a few grunts. Some even cursed at my desperate attempts to mug them. I didn’t kill anyone just because they didn’t want to do business, but some who dared to curse my ancestors and the ones I served, earned smiles. Cursing ancestors was acceptable, but my villainess was meant to be respected. Because she was the product of my handiness and meticulous machinations.
When I was about to abandon it in the middle of the forest, I met familiar faces. Code name, Three Musketeers.
“Ah!” That made three of those, and they scurried closer to me.
“If it isn’t lady Beth’s butler,” the hairy-chested man said, and he was still wearing the same dingy tunic that exposed his chest completely. He had cut his hair, probably by himself, because the uneven strands that lingered out occasionally on his head were too eye-catching.
The lanky, with his curls, and the bald shorty hadn’t changed much. Were they brothers? The resemblance wasn’t visible.
“I’m lady Letitia’s butler,” I said, “hair man.”
“Then I won’t respect you,” he gave me a haughty glance. “I am Eqan, bastard! Not hair-man.”
I nodded and turned to the other two men. Weren’t they supposed to introduce themselves after the boss?
“I’m Eqan,” the hair man repeated, head raised and neck stretched out like a taut string.
“I heard you,” I gave him a confused glance. “Should I know the name?”
“This bugger!” he smacked my head, and I earned a bump, no doubt. That was some muscle on this bastard. “I’m Eqan, the best B-rank mercenary in the guild. And my cronies are Riol and Shotky, both B-ranked mercenaries. How dare a newbie not know our names?”
“I do not know any S-ranked bast… mercenaries, either,” I rolled my eyes. “And it’s a shame that you couldn’t even handle a newbie in a three versus one brawl.”
“Boss, this bastard deserves some thrashing,” Riol, the lanky, said. “Never seen such an arrogant newbie before.”
“Show this bastard what happens when he messes with Equan, boss,” Shotky added.
“In the name of lady Beth, I will challenge you to a duel!” the hairy bastard said. “I underestimated you before… Wait, what’s that?”
“This?” I raised the large pelt trailing behind me, and their eyes followed. “I found this in the forest.”
I wasn’t lying. We undead hated lies, so we just skipped the truth. White lying is not lying, and undead named it as such.
“And you want us to believe it?” Equan raised his brows, and his hands followed, ready to grab the pelt from my hands.
“I will sell it for sixteen shins,” I said, hiding the pelt behind me. Yule peeked out from the charred pelt at the same time and glared at Beth’s worshippers, who had stepped forward to rob us. “Nothing less.”
“Sixteen shins? That looks like the hide of Tusmat. If you tell us where you found the pelt, we will give you twenty shins. One gliun of Tasmut bone sells for close to a thousand shins, and if we find a single bone, we’ll pay you one hundred shins.”
“Two hundred shins,” I said, already regretting letting Yule chew the boar. Hopefully, they wouldn’t notice the drool on the bones. “I found many bones in the pit. Thought they were useless and left them as such.”
“Boss,” Shotky called out, “this bastard might be lying. No sane person leaves Tasmut bones in the open.”
“But he’s lady Beth’s servant,” Riol added, scratching his cheek. His front teeth poked out of his upper lip, and one was crooked. “So, we can trust him.”
“He’s not lady Beth’s butler, Riol,” Shotky said, glaring at the lanky. “Didn’t he say that in the beginning?”
“Lady Beth is lady Letitia’s good friend. So, her servant is equivalent to lady Beth’s servant. Why do you have to nitpick on my logic every time?!”
“AH?! You are a dunce lanky! Don’t you remember how you almost lead us to a fast trap?! We could have died right there!” the shorty moved to face Riol.
“You had led the way, Shotky,” the lanky said, still calm, unlike the riled-up Stocky.
“Bugger! It was your idea to walk–“ they both earned smacks and shut up for good.
“So, these bones,” Eqan glanced at me. “How many did you see?”
“Many,” I said. “If you promise to divide the amount equally between us, then I’ll take you there. As you know, I’m a butler, so it would bring disgrace to my lady if I sell them behind her back.”
That was partly the truth. The more important part was the suspicion I would attract for selling Tusmat bones, despite being the lowest-ranked mercenary. For now, I wanted to live lowkey until my lady said otherwise. It wasn’t my job to overthrow the kingdom, but her and her alone. I would follow her wishes without a second thought, and if she failed, then well, consider the domain doomed.
That’s why, if you value mortals’ lives and other worthless ethics, wish for my lady’s success. If you revel in bloodshed like me, follow along in silence. I will lead you there.
The three men turned around and discussed for a while until a few nods followed. “We’ll give you twenty percent of the profits. Unlike Garlan, we always keep our word. That is the doctrine of Ladient Brothers,” Equan said.
“Works. As long as I get some bread out of those bones, I have no qualms about the earning,” I shrugged and led them to the pit.
By now, there were a few other mercenaries in the pit, stacking as many bones as they could. The three musketeers, without guns, jumped headfirst into the ditch. Brawls started, some even losing teeth, and a few clothes burned. Spell resumed, and the three men were surprisingly safe despite the onslaught. It was one gruesome battle in the ditch below, even though there were more than enough bones for everyone.
I couldn’t help but laugh at the stupid antics of the mortals. The bump on my head disappeared with [Heal], and I discreetly helped out the three men with my own [Dispel].
Yule sat beside me, watching the bloodshed with my enthusiasm.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” I grinned and patted its head.
“Grr,” it bobbed its head and moved closer to me.
“Move out, Yule,” I said as I deftly avoided the charging boar. It was more massive than the stories of the capital, and the tusk alone was longer than my entire body. Blood-red fangs slid past its muzzle and gleamed out of its mouth that which was dripping with the blood of its recent kill. I felt the land shudder at its weight, and its body alone was twice the size of my lady. Its dark eyes considered us again as white smoke rushed out of its nose, and I didn’t want to think how warm its innards were. Covered in black fur, scars decked its whole body, honors of its battles against the arrogant mortals.
“I don’t want to kill this beast, Yule,” I said, but its mouth was already dripping with drool. “We can drop it in the middle of the capital and let it kill some more puny mortals.”
I never really liked killing animals for the sake of it. And never if I would save a few hundred people. I hunted for meat like every undead, and it was a necessity. Not this, because the Tusmat was a harmless boar as long as I was concerned. Killed a few mortals? I will gladly see it kill more.
“Grr,” Yule glared at me, and I sighed. Trees lined around us erratically, and its blitheness as it maneuvered through the thick woods surprised me.
“Look, boar,” I called it out, and it charged again. I almost felt the ground shake at its charge, and it knocked a well-grown tree with its tusk. Of course, after missing its mark again.
I cast weak [Gravity] around the boar, and a dark circle materialized instantly, trapping the boar within. “I just want to have an idle chat, boar. What would you do if I dropped you in the middle of the capital? I–“
Sure, I was careless. The huge tusk rammed into my neck and came out through the other end, blood spilling on my suit, on the wilted grass below, and on one raged hound. Yule charged at the beast, its pitiful body bouncing off the boar’s meaty legs that had more girth than one Garlan. It snorted coldly and tried to move its head, but I just smiled, despite this unbearable pain, and increased the intensity of [Gravity].
“If you don’t want to reason with this undead, I’ll give you a painful death.” I slammed my hand laden with [Cardina Garch] on its gigantic tusk and broke it in a single hit.
The boar went a foot deeper into the ground as I burned mana with increasing pace and removed the thick tusk out of my neck. Yule glanced at the hole in my neck and shook its head.
[Heal] followed, and I walked closer to the boar that was more than one undead below the ground. Its aggrieved cries would have attracted the entire garrison from the capital if it wasn’t for my ward. “I gave you a chance, beast,” I said and cast [Thiage] that was ten times more potent than the [Thiage] of a Cognoscente mage. Of course, that wasn’t my limit, but enough for this boar that had bored a hole in my neck. The lightning charred the beast immediately, and it collapsed to the ground without any resistance.
“Gwar Gwar Gwar!” the hound slammed its head against my legs and tried to bite my tailcoat. I kicked it into the pit, and it fell over the roasted boar.
“Grr,” it nodded at me in acknowledgment and began eating the boar.
Yule climbed out of the hole on its own after closer to a dozen minutes. I wasn’t counting, but I trusted my time-keeping skills enough to differentiate between an hour and a few minutes. It amazed me that Yule had fitted the entire meat in its tiny stomach. The pelt, however, was untouched, except for a uniform incision on the large hump of the boar, and the bones were gnawed, chewed, bitten, but not eaten. After pondering for a while, I decided to sell the pelt to any roaming mercenaries in the forest.
“Can you get that pelt, Yule?” I asked, and it shook its rosy butt at me.
I kicked it to the ditch with a smack on its head, and Yule climbed back soon by dragging the sizeable bloodless pelt with its mouth. [Thiage] might have evaporated the blood, but I wasn’t versed in enough biology to find the reason. I knew a few things about bread and yeast, probably too many, and that was good enough. The pelt was completely charred and appeared unusable at a glance, but I knew better than just to abandon it. The pelt was large enough to cover ten Garlan, so I began my hunt for mercenaries who would pay me some bread shins in exchange.
I was too hopeful about the black and charred pelt, as many just sent me off with a few grunts. Some even cursed at my desperate attempts to mug them. I didn’t kill anyone just because they didn’t want to do business, but some who dared to curse my ancestors and the ones I served, earned smiles. Cursing ancestors was acceptable, but my villainess was meant to be respected. Because she was the product of my handiness and meticulous machinations.
When I was about to abandon it in the middle of the forest, I met familiar faces. Code name, Three Musketeers.
“Ah!” That made three of those, and they scurried closer to me.
“If it isn’t lady Beth’s butler,” the hairy-chested man said, and he was still wearing the same dingy tunic that exposed his chest completely. He had cut his hair, probably by himself, because the uneven strands that lingered out occasionally on his head were too eye-catching.
The lanky, with his curls, and the bald shorty hadn’t changed much. Were they brothers? The resemblance wasn’t visible.
“I’m lady Letitia’s butler,” I said, “hair man.”
“Then I won’t respect you,” he gave me a haughty glance. “I am Eqan, bastard! Not hair-man.”
I nodded and turned to the other two men. Weren’t they supposed to introduce themselves after the boss?
“I’m Eqan,” the hair man repeated, head raised and neck stretched out like a taut string.
“I heard you,” I gave him a confused glance. “Should I know the name?”
“This bugger!” he smacked my head, and I earned a bump, no doubt. That was some muscle on this bastard. “I’m Eqan, the best B-rank mercenary in the guild. And my cronies are Riol and Shotky, both B-ranked mercenaries. How dare a newbie not know our names?”
“I do not know any S-ranked bast… mercenaries, either,” I rolled my eyes. “And it’s a shame that you couldn’t even handle a newbie in a three versus one brawl.”
“Boss, this bastard deserves some thrashing,” Riol, the lanky, said. “Never seen such an arrogant newbie before.”
“Show this bastard what happens when he messes with Equan, boss,” Shotky added.
“In the name of lady Beth, I will challenge you to a duel!” the hairy bastard said. “I underestimated you before… Wait, what’s that?”
“This?” I raised the large pelt trailing behind me, and their eyes followed. “I found this in the forest.”
I wasn’t lying. We undead hated lies, so we just skipped the truth. White lying is not lying, and undead named it as such.
“And you want us to believe it?” Equan raised his brows, and his hands followed, ready to grab the pelt from my hands.
“I will sell it for sixteen shins,” I said, hiding the pelt behind me. Yule peeked out from the charred pelt at the same time and glared at Beth’s worshippers, who had stepped forward to rob us. “Nothing less.”
“Sixteen shins? That looks like the hide of Tusmat. If you tell us where you found the pelt, we will give you twenty shins. One gliun of Tasmut bone sells for close to a thousand shins, and if we find a single bone, we’ll pay you one hundred shins.”
“Two hundred shins,” I said, already regretting letting Yule chew the boar. Hopefully, they wouldn’t notice the drool on the bones. “I found many bones in the pit. Thought they were useless and left them as such.”
“Boss,” Shotky called out, “this bastard might be lying. No sane person leaves Tasmut bones in the open.”
“But he’s lady Beth’s servant,” Riol added, scratching his cheek. His front teeth poked out of his upper lip, and one was crooked. “So, we can trust him.”
“He’s not lady Beth’s butler, Riol,” Shotky said, glaring at the lanky. “Didn’t he say that in the beginning?”
“Lady Beth is lady Letitia’s good friend. So, her servant is equivalent to lady Beth’s servant. Why do you have to nitpick on my logic every time?!”
“AH?! You are a dunce lanky! Don’t you remember how you almost lead us to a fast trap?! We could have died right there!” the shorty moved to face Riol.
“You had led the way, Shotky,” the lanky said, still calm, unlike the riled-up Stocky.
“Bugger! It was your idea to walk–“ they both earned smacks and shut up for good.
“So, these bones,” Eqan glanced at me. “How many did you see?”
“Many,” I said. “If you promise to divide the amount equally between us, then I’ll take you there. As you know, I’m a butler, so it would bring disgrace to my lady if I sell them behind her back.”
That was partly the truth. The more important part was the suspicion I would attract for selling Tusmat bones, despite being the lowest-ranked mercenary. For now, I wanted to live lowkey until my lady said otherwise. It wasn’t my job to overthrow the kingdom, but her and her alone. I would follow her wishes without a second thought, and if she failed, then well, consider the domain doomed.
That’s why, if you value mortals’ lives and other worthless ethics, wish for my lady’s success. If you revel in bloodshed like me, follow along in silence. I will lead you there.
The three men turned around and discussed for a while until a few nods followed. “We’ll give you twenty percent of the profits. Unlike Garlan, we always keep our word. That is the doctrine of Ladient Brothers,” Equan said.
“Works. As long as I get some bread out of those bones, I have no qualms about the earning,” I shrugged and led them to the pit.
By now, there were a few other mercenaries in the pit, stacking as many bones as they could. The three musketeers, without guns, jumped headfirst into the ditch. Brawls started, some even losing teeth, and a few clothes burned. Spell resumed, and the three men were surprisingly safe despite the onslaught. It was one gruesome battle in the ditch below, even though there were more than enough bones for everyone.
I couldn’t help but laugh at the stupid antics of the mortals. The bump on my head disappeared with [Heal], and I discreetly helped out the three men with my own [Dispel].
Yule sat beside me, watching the bloodshed with my enthusiasm.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” I grinned and patted its head.
“Grr,” it bobbed its head and moved closer to me.
