Chapter 513: They, Who Loved Each Other
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Axel smirked. He leaned forward and brought his face to hers, looking into her gold and chocolate eyes.
"Yes," he whispered. "We do."
Alice bit her lower lip and smiled. A fluttering relief in her belly as she thought he would accept, and she could fill his thoughts with something other than doubts and questions.
"Then join me," she replied softly.
Axel tilted his head and looked at her with a gentleness that made her breath hitch. He reached his hand up and pushed her hair back behind her ear.
"Not until your heart has calmed and your mind has settled."
Alice tilted her head against his hand in a pout.
"How is my heart supposed to be calm when you're so close and yet so far."
Axel smiled and leaned forward, pressing his head to hers in a gentle nuzzle.
"Do you think I don't know the beat of your heart?" he whispered against her ear. "The way it hums when you are peaceful. Thumps when you're scared. Do you think I haven't memorized that strong beat that only plays for me?"
Their temples rested against each other as he spoke. Alice inhaled his comforting and intoxicating scent. The sweet and musky air touched every one of her senses.
"I know your heartbeat better than my own," he whispered. "I know when you want me and when you want to distract me."
Alice felt a chill run down her spine.
She swallowed and turned away.
Axel sat back on the stool. Alice glanced in his direction, expecting to see anger or at least disappointment. But instead, that gentle expression, that calm and tender look, gazed back at her.
She let out a soft sigh and turned in the water, laying her back against the tub and resting her neck on the towel light before.
Alice closed her eyes and took a deep breath. The subtle but sweet scent of the rosewater twirled in her nose. She allowed it to roll over her as she tried to calm her fears and worries.
"How long were you listening to Myka and me?" she asked.
"Not long," Axel replied without hesitation. "I heard you tell him about a conversation you and I had not long after you came back to me."
Alice swallowed. Suddenly feeling very naked in front of him.
Axel felt the fear in her, the quickening of her heart, and how she pulled away from him. He reached out, placing his hands on her shoulders. Almost instantly, she began to relax.
Feeling the warmth of his hand, the connection through their touch. Alice felt relieved and also irritated.
"No," she said, sitting forward and crossing her arms over her chest.
"What is it?" Axel asked with concern.
"It's not fair," she said. "If I can't touch you, you can't touch me either."
Axel sighed.
"Alice, I was trying to help you ease your mind."
"I know," she said, looking back at him, "and you know that with you, in your arms, is when I feel at ease."
"Yes, but… Alice, we need to talk, to be open about whatever it is that is hanging between us. I don't need to be distracted from that conversation, and you don't need to avoid it."
Alice swallowed. She knew he was right, and though that had been her plan, it wasn't anymore. She didn't want to have the conversation. Instead, she wanted to lose themselves in their passion and forget her doubts and fears.
But even more than that, she wanted to continue to feel that open connection with him. That honest bond they shared. And that wouldn't be possible without addressing those fears.
"My hearing isn't like yours," she said. "My senses are trained, not heightened. You can hear my heart from another room and feel the comfort it brings you. But I can only feel yours when we touch."
Axel listened, he knew this already, but he didn't realize that she couldn't hear him. He knew that when he touched her, it soothed her almost immediately, but he didn't realize that was the reason.
He took a deep breath and stood up. He reached his hands to the bottom of his shirt and grabbed it. Then he looked at her with seriousness.
"I will not be distracted," he said.
"We don't have to do anything, I promise," she said.
Axel licked his lips, sighing as he wondered if it was a good idea, but he removed his shirt anyway.
Alice looked at his impressive body with the same hunger she always had. Though every intimate moment they shared left her satisfied and writhing in pleasure, she could never get enough of him.
"Alice…" he said with warning as his thumbs slipped into the waist of his lounge pants.
Alice looked up at him with a grin.
"I made a promise, but I'm not dead," she replied. "Can't I, at minimum, have a feast with my eyes before you starve me."
She bit down on her lower lip as she watched his waistline with anticipation. Axel let out a soft growl.
"What?" she asked, looking up at his raised eyebrow.
"Turn around," he said.
"You've got to be kidding," she scoffed.
"Sit forward and turn the other way," he instructed.
"Axel, I have seen every part of you," she argued. "Why bother acting shy now?"
Axel growled again.
"Turn around, or I'm putting my shirt back on."
With a huff and a pout, Alice did as she was told. She heard the shuffle of his clothing and the movement in the water as he climbed in. Then, as he stretched his legs out, he slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her back to lay against his chest.
Alice closed her eyes and let his presence envelop her. The warmth of the water and his skin touching hers was like the warmest blanket on a cold night. His arm at her waist hugged her gently. And the soft tickle of his long hair sticking to the parts of her shoulders and chest that slipped out of the water brought a smile to her face.
This was what she needed, to feel his warmth, his presence. To hear the sound of his breathing and his soft heartbeat blending into a song in her soul. The connection between them was profound. Just a touch was enough, but to be wrapped in him. It was another level.
Axel had insisted on a conversation. He had refused to get into the water with her because he didn't want her to distract them from the conversation.
He wanted her to feel safe and comfortable. To know that he wasn't going anywhere, but he needed her to know that the things she was afraid of were not real.
He agreed to get in because he knew she was right. She only lowered her defenses when he held her in his arms, and they existed together. But now, as he held her soft, naked body pressed against his own, he struggled to maintain his composure.
The instinct was natural. It was primal. The need to mate.
The wolf in him found the idea of holding back to be ridiculous and insulting to his mate. Instead, he wanted to shower her in affection, to hold her close and press warm, wet kisses all over her body until she was worn out from the intensity of his passion.
Axel bit down on the inside of his lip, trying to calm his urges. He knew that she could feel his excitement growing. In truth, it wouldn't take much for her to turn this situation into a distraction, and he wasn't sure he could resist if she did.
Alice let out a sigh, not a moan or a whimper of desire, a sigh filled with heavy emotion.
Suddenly Axel's rational mind was in control once more. His focus on tearing down the barriers they had placed between themselves became clear again.
He hugged her tighter, knowing there was nothing he could say until she was ready to speak.
Alice felt his arms squeeze her gently, showing her that he was there, waiting for her to tell him what she needed.
"We can't have a family," she said softly. "You and I, can never have a family together."
It was the first time she was admitting the whole truth out loud.
The problem wasn't that she couldn't have a baby or that he couldn't. But that they couldn't.
They, who loved each other.
They, who spent so many years with an emptiness in their hearts, longing to be together without even knowing.
They, who had found each other and given each other up for the good of everyone else.
And they, who had finally decided that their bond mattered more to them than what others believed was right or wrong.
Alice felt a painful tightness in her chest at the thoughts that swirled in her mind.
"Axel…" she whispered painfully. "I think… I think my heart is broken."
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Axel smirked. He leaned forward and brought his face to hers, looking into her gold and chocolate eyes.
"Yes," he whispered. "We do."
Alice bit her lower lip and smiled. A fluttering relief in her belly as she thought he would accept, and she could fill his thoughts with something other than doubts and questions.
"Then join me," she replied softly.
Axel tilted his head and looked at her with a gentleness that made her breath hitch. He reached his hand up and pushed her hair back behind her ear.
"Not until your heart has calmed and your mind has settled."
Alice tilted her head against his hand in a pout.
"How is my heart supposed to be calm when you're so close and yet so far."
Axel smiled and leaned forward, pressing his head to hers in a gentle nuzzle.
"Do you think I don't know the beat of your heart?" he whispered against her ear. "The way it hums when you are peaceful. Thumps when you're scared. Do you think I haven't memorized that strong beat that only plays for me?"
Their temples rested against each other as he spoke. Alice inhaled his comforting and intoxicating scent. The sweet and musky air touched every one of her senses.
"I know your heartbeat better than my own," he whispered. "I know when you want me and when you want to distract me."
Alice felt a chill run down her spine.
She swallowed and turned away.
Axel sat back on the stool. Alice glanced in his direction, expecting to see anger or at least disappointment. But instead, that gentle expression, that calm and tender look, gazed back at her.
She let out a soft sigh and turned in the water, laying her back against the tub and resting her neck on the towel light before.
Alice closed her eyes and took a deep breath. The subtle but sweet scent of the rosewater twirled in her nose. She allowed it to roll over her as she tried to calm her fears and worries.
"How long were you listening to Myka and me?" she asked.
"Not long," Axel replied without hesitation. "I heard you tell him about a conversation you and I had not long after you came back to me."
Alice swallowed. Suddenly feeling very naked in front of him.
Axel felt the fear in her, the quickening of her heart, and how she pulled away from him. He reached out, placing his hands on her shoulders. Almost instantly, she began to relax.
Feeling the warmth of his hand, the connection through their touch. Alice felt relieved and also irritated.
"No," she said, sitting forward and crossing her arms over her chest.
"What is it?" Axel asked with concern.
"It's not fair," she said. "If I can't touch you, you can't touch me either."
Axel sighed.
"Alice, I was trying to help you ease your mind."
"I know," she said, looking back at him, "and you know that with you, in your arms, is when I feel at ease."
"Yes, but… Alice, we need to talk, to be open about whatever it is that is hanging between us. I don't need to be distracted from that conversation, and you don't need to avoid it."
Alice swallowed. She knew he was right, and though that had been her plan, it wasn't anymore. She didn't want to have the conversation. Instead, she wanted to lose themselves in their passion and forget her doubts and fears.
But even more than that, she wanted to continue to feel that open connection with him. That honest bond they shared. And that wouldn't be possible without addressing those fears.
"My hearing isn't like yours," she said. "My senses are trained, not heightened. You can hear my heart from another room and feel the comfort it brings you. But I can only feel yours when we touch."
Axel listened, he knew this already, but he didn't realize that she couldn't hear him. He knew that when he touched her, it soothed her almost immediately, but he didn't realize that was the reason.
He took a deep breath and stood up. He reached his hands to the bottom of his shirt and grabbed it. Then he looked at her with seriousness.
"I will not be distracted," he said.
"We don't have to do anything, I promise," she said.
Axel licked his lips, sighing as he wondered if it was a good idea, but he removed his shirt anyway.
Alice looked at his impressive body with the same hunger she always had. Though every intimate moment they shared left her satisfied and writhing in pleasure, she could never get enough of him.
"Alice…" he said with warning as his thumbs slipped into the waist of his lounge pants.
Alice looked up at him with a grin.
"I made a promise, but I'm not dead," she replied. "Can't I, at minimum, have a feast with my eyes before you starve me."
She bit down on her lower lip as she watched his waistline with anticipation. Axel let out a soft growl.
"What?" she asked, looking up at his raised eyebrow.
"Turn around," he said.
"You've got to be kidding," she scoffed.
"Sit forward and turn the other way," he instructed.
"Axel, I have seen every part of you," she argued. "Why bother acting shy now?"
Axel growled again.
"Turn around, or I'm putting my shirt back on."
With a huff and a pout, Alice did as she was told. She heard the shuffle of his clothing and the movement in the water as he climbed in. Then, as he stretched his legs out, he slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her back to lay against his chest.
Alice closed her eyes and let his presence envelop her. The warmth of the water and his skin touching hers was like the warmest blanket on a cold night. His arm at her waist hugged her gently. And the soft tickle of his long hair sticking to the parts of her shoulders and chest that slipped out of the water brought a smile to her face.
This was what she needed, to feel his warmth, his presence. To hear the sound of his breathing and his soft heartbeat blending into a song in her soul. The connection between them was profound. Just a touch was enough, but to be wrapped in him. It was another level.
Axel had insisted on a conversation. He had refused to get into the water with her because he didn't want her to distract them from the conversation.
He wanted her to feel safe and comfortable. To know that he wasn't going anywhere, but he needed her to know that the things she was afraid of were not real.
He agreed to get in because he knew she was right. She only lowered her defenses when he held her in his arms, and they existed together. But now, as he held her soft, naked body pressed against his own, he struggled to maintain his composure.
The instinct was natural. It was primal. The need to mate.
The wolf in him found the idea of holding back to be ridiculous and insulting to his mate. Instead, he wanted to shower her in affection, to hold her close and press warm, wet kisses all over her body until she was worn out from the intensity of his passion.
Axel bit down on the inside of his lip, trying to calm his urges. He knew that she could feel his excitement growing. In truth, it wouldn't take much for her to turn this situation into a distraction, and he wasn't sure he could resist if she did.
Alice let out a sigh, not a moan or a whimper of desire, a sigh filled with heavy emotion.
Suddenly Axel's rational mind was in control once more. His focus on tearing down the barriers they had placed between themselves became clear again.
He hugged her tighter, knowing there was nothing he could say until she was ready to speak.
Alice felt his arms squeeze her gently, showing her that he was there, waiting for her to tell him what she needed.
"We can't have a family," she said softly. "You and I, can never have a family together."
It was the first time she was admitting the whole truth out loud.
The problem wasn't that she couldn't have a baby or that he couldn't. But that they couldn't.
They, who loved each other.
They, who spent so many years with an emptiness in their hearts, longing to be together without even knowing.
They, who had found each other and given each other up for the good of everyone else.
And they, who had finally decided that their bond mattered more to them than what others believed was right or wrong.
Alice felt a painful tightness in her chest at the thoughts that swirled in her mind.
"Axel…" she whispered painfully. "I think… I think my heart is broken."
Axel smirked. He leaned forward and brought his face to hers, looking into her gold and chocolate eyes."Yes," he whispered. "We do."Alice bit her lower lip and smiled. A fluttering relief in her belly as she thought he would accept, and she could fill his thoughts with something other than doubts and questions."Then join me," she replied softly.Axel tilted his head and looked at her with a gentleness that made her breath hitch. He reached his hand up and pushed her hair back behind her ear."Not until your heart has calmed and your mind has settled."Alice tilted her head against his hand in a pout."How is my heart supposed to be calm when you're so close and yet so far."Axel smiled and leaned forward, pressing his head to hers in a gentle nuzzle."Do you think I don't know the beat of your heart?" he whispered against her ear. "The way it hums when you are peaceful. Thumps when you're scared. Do you think I haven't memorized that strong beat that only plays for me?"Their temples rested against each other as he spoke. Alice inhaled his comforting and intoxicating scent. The sweet and musky air touched every one of her senses."I know your heartbeat better than my own," he whispered. "I know when you want me and when you want to distract me."Alice felt a chill run down her spine.She swallowed and turned away.Axel sat back on the stool. Alice glanced in his direction, expecting to see anger or at least disappointment. But instead, that gentle expression, that calm and tender look, gazed back at her.She let out a soft sigh and turned in the water, laying her back against the tub and resting her neck on the towel light before.Alice closed her eyes and took a deep breath. The subtle but sweet scent of the rosewater twirled in her nose. She allowed it to roll over her as she tried to calm her fears and worries."How long were you listening to Myka and me?" she asked."Not long," Axel replied without hesitation. "I heard you tell him about a conversation you and I had not long after you came back to me."Alice swallowed. Suddenly feeling very naked in front of him.Axel felt the fear in her, the quickening of her heart, and how she pulled away from him. He reached out, placing his hands on her shoulders. Almost instantly, she began to relax.Feeling the warmth of his hand, the connection through their touch. Alice felt relieved and also irritated."No," she said, sitting forward and crossing her arms over her chest."What is it?" Axel asked with concern."It's not fair," she said. "If I can't touch you, you can't touch me either."Axel sighed."Alice, I was trying to help you ease your mind.""I know," she said, looking back at him, "and you know that with you, in your arms, is when I feel at ease.""Yes, but Alice, we need to talk, to be open about whatever it is that is hanging between us. I don't need to be distracted from that conversation, and you don't need to avoid it."Alice swallowed. She knew he was right, and though that had been her plan, it wasn't anymore. She didn't want to have the conversation. Instead, she wanted to lose themselves in their passion and forget her doubts and fears.But even more than that, she wanted to continue to feel that open connection with him. That honest bond they shared. And that wouldn't be possible without addressing those fears."My hearing isn't like yours," she said. "My senses are trained, not heightened. You can hear my heart from another room and feel the comfort it brings you. But I can only feel yours when we touch."Axel listened, he knew this already, but he didn't realize that she couldn't hear him. He knew that when he touched her, it soothed her almost immediately, but he didn't realize that was the reason.He took a deep breath and stood up. He reached his hands to the bottom of his shirt and grabbed it. Then he looked at her with seriousness."I will not be distracted," he said."We don't have to do anything, I promise," she said.Axel licked his lips, sighing as he wondered if it was a good idea, but he removed his shirt anyway.Alice looked at his impressive body with the same hunger she always had. Though every intimate moment they shared left her satisfied and writhing in pleasure, she could never get enough of him."Alice" he said with warning as his thumbs slipped into the waist of his lounge pants.Alice looked up at him with a grin."I made a promise, but I'm not dead," she replied. "Can't I, at minimum, have a feast with my eyes before you starve me."She bit down on her lower lip as she watched his waistline with anticipation. Axel let out a soft growl."What?" she asked, looking up at his raised eyebrow."Turn around," he said."You've got to be kidding," she scoffed."Sit forward and turn the other way," he instructed."Axel, I have seen every part of you," she argued. "Why bother acting shy now?"Axel growled again."Turn around, or I'm putting my shirt back on."With a huff and a pout, Alice did as she was told. She heard the shuffle of his clothing and the movement in the water as he climbed in. Then, as he stretched his legs out, he slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her back to lay against his chest.Alice closed her eyes and let his presence envelop her. The warmth of the water and his skin touching hers was like the warmest blanket on a cold night. His arm at her waist hugged her gently. And the soft tickle of his long hair sticking to the parts of her shoulders and chest that slipped out of the water brought a smile to her face.This was what she needed, to feel his warmth, his presence. To hear the sound of his breathing and his soft heartbeat blending into a song in her soul. The connection between them was profound. Just a touch was enough, but to be wrapped in him. It was another level.Axel had insisted on a conversation. He had refused to get into the water with her because he didn't want her to distract them from the conversation.He wanted her to feel safe and comfortable. To know that he wasn't going anywhere, but he needed her to know that the things she was afraid of were not real.He agreed to get in because he knew she was right. She only lowered her defenses when he held her in his arms, and they existed together. But now, as he held her soft, naked body pressed against his own, he struggled to maintain his composure.The instinct was natural. It was primal. The need to mate.The wolf in him found the idea of holding back to be ridiculous and insulting to his mate. Instead, he wanted to shower her in affection, to hold her close and press warm, wet kisses all over her body until she was worn out from the intensity of his passion.Axel bit down on the inside of his lip, trying to calm his urges. He knew that she could feel his excitement growing. In truth, it wouldn't take much for her to turn this situation into a distraction, and he wasn't sure he could resist if she did.Alice let out a sigh, not a moan or a whimper of desire, a sigh filled with heavy emotion.Suddenly Axel's rational mind was in control once more. His focus on tearing down the barriers they had placed between themselves became clear again.He hugged her tighter, knowing there was nothing he could say until she was ready to speak.Alice felt his arms squeeze her gently, showing her that he was there, waiting for her to tell him what she needed."We can't have a family," she said softly. "You and I, can never have a family together."It was the first time she was admitting the whole truth out loud.The problem wasn't that she couldn't have a baby or that he couldn't. But that they couldn't.They, who loved each other.They, who spent so many years with an emptiness in their hearts, longing to be together without even knowing.They, who had found each other and given each other up for the good of everyone else.And they, who had finally decided that their bond mattered more to them than what others believed was right or wrong.Alice felt a painful tightness in her chest at the thoughts that swirled in her mind."Axel" she whispered painfully. "I think I think my heart is broken."
