Chapter 640: I Know It Doesn’t Help
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"Are you okay?" Ashleigh asked. Concerned by Alice's demeanor.
Alice tilted her head with a smile.
"Are you worried?" she asked. "About me?"
Ashleigh swallowed and looked away.
"The way you were talking," Ashleigh replied softly. "It sounded like how you used to talk before Axel."
Alice grinned and turned back to Axel.
"Coping mechanisms come in all shapes, sizes, tastes, and colors," she said in a cheery voice.
Alice took a short breath.
"Sometimes, they're wrapped in playful packaging dipped in sarcasm and self-deluded commentary," she continued. "Allowing a separation of self from reality just long enough to take a breath… before it crashes back over you and pulls you down into the cold dark depths."
Ashleigh chewed her bottom lip wishing she hadn't said anything.
"Are you going to say hello?" Alice asked.
Ashleigh lifted her eyes. Alice was still looking at Axel, but she knew the words were directed at her.
"I can leave if you want privacy to speak with him," Alice said softly. "But I prefer to stay close and not be gone long."
Ashleigh stepped forward. She looked down at her big brother lying on the bed as though he were simply napping. A part of her wanted to call out to him. To tell him to stop messing around and get up.
The report had said his leg was badly damaged. That his body was almost encased in ice. His heart stopped. The infection was aggressive and spreading fast. His cold kept it back, but at a steep price. Without Myka's power, the cold would have killed him. And without Bell's blood, his internal damage would have killed him.
In her mind, she saw Caleb staring back at her with eyes full of love as the roots wrapped around his body and yanked him back into the darkness. She clenched her jaw painfully.
Axel should have died that night. But Alice saved him. Myka saved him. Bell saved him.
Caleb only had her.
Ashleigh swallowed and turned away from her brother, looking back to Alice.
"I came to see you," she said.
Alice furrowed her brow and lifted her gaze.
"Me?" she asked.
"Yes," Ashleigh replied. "I need your help."
Alice looked at Ashleigh curiously and then took a deep breath.
"No."
Ashleigh's eyes widened, and she took a sharp breath.
"You don't even know what I need," Ashleigh said.
"I know that whatever it is, it will require me to leave," Alice replied, "knowing you, it will also require me to risk my life."
Ashleigh looked away.
Alice smiled.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
Ashleigh looked back at her with a furrowed brow. Why was she apologizing?
"I know it doesn't help," Alice said. "But I believe you will find him."
"You do?" Ashleigh whispered.
"I do," Alice replied, reaching out and adjusting the blankets on Axel's bed. "You need Caleb."
Ashleigh stared at Alice. Confusion settled over her. What game was Alice playing? She said she believed that Caleb was alive and that Ashleigh would find him. But she refused to help?
"Then help me," Ashleigh said. "You can find things that no one else can. You know everyone's secrets before they do! You have to know something or someone that can help me bring him back!"
Alice looked up at Ashleigh.
"I gave Galen and Summer complete access to all of the files I had on Spring and Autumn," she said. "They have people combing through every one of them looking for any connection to the ley line or the way gates."
Alice stood from her chair and took a step toward Ashleigh.
"But," she said quietly. "I have to tell you, I never really knew anything about those subjects. As far as I can tell, Autumn had no information about them either, and Spring…."
Alice let out a sigh.
"Chances are very high that nothing useful will be found from those files," she said honestly.
Ashleigh felt the heaviness settling over her chest once more. That feeling that she couldn't take in enough air.
"Take me to Spring!" Ashleigh shouted. "Take me to the mound. Yea, we destroyed it, but it might still have some kind of connection."
"Spring is not safe," Alice said. "For anyone."
"I will protect you," Ashleigh stated firmly.
"Corrine reads those reports to Axel every night," Alice said, "Spring is overrun. As strong as you are, you could not protect yourself, let alone me."
"Fine, but I'm sure you know a way to help us avoid any trouble," Ashleigh insisted.
"Ashleigh," Alice sighed. "I am not leaving Axel, and even if I was willing to do so, I would not endanger my family that way."
Ashleigh's eyes followed the movement of Alice's hand to her belly. She swallowed and chewed the inside of her lip. Corrine had already told her about the pregnancy. But seeing the small bump and how Alice touched it so tenderly made it real.
His warm, playful voice whispered in her ear as the memory played in her mind.
"So, in this scenario," Caleb said, turning his body toward her as he finished the last button of his shirt. "I am trying to protect my wife… and child?"
"I was just saying, if. If you were Galen, that's what you would do."
"Yes," he said, moving toward the bed. "If I was Galen, and if you were Bell."
"Mmhmm," Ashleigh replied.
Caleb kneeled on the bed, and Ashleigh couldn't help but smile as he moved with the grace and focus of a wolf stalking his prey.
Ashleigh laid back in bed, resting her head on the pillows as he crawled over her. He pulled down the sheet. She wore a tank top with no bra. Caleb slipped his fingers under the hem of the shirt, lifting it up just under her breasts.
He leaned forward, his mouth hovering just over her stomach.
Ashleigh chewed her lower lip as her heart picked up its steady rhythm.
"And if you were carrying our own little pup, right here," he whispered. The heat of his breath tickled her and sent small shockwaves shooting over her body.
She drew in a shaky breath as he pressed his lips to the soft flesh of her stomach.
Ashleigh felt the painful tug of another memory pulling itself to the surface.
"I wasn't trying to say we should start planning now, Ash," Caleb said. "Just… that it would be nice, someday."
"Sure," Ashleigh said with a pause. "Someday."
Caleb swallowed and looked at her carefully.
"Ash," he called. "You do… want children, right? I mean, when we talked before… I know you said you weren't ready, and I understand. I am not in a rush, either. But you do want them at some point, right?"
He had looked so hopeful at that moment and so scared.
"I'm just saying… it's not the right time," Ashleigh replied with hesitation. "I'm not quite nineteen, and with all of our responsibilities… I think it's going to take some time. That's all."
"Okay," he replied, turning with a gentle smile. "I understand."
Ashleigh nodded, and they both turned their attention back to the road. She knew he was trying, but she could see the disappointment in his eyes.
At that time, Ashleigh couldn't understand how they could even consider being parents. How could they have a baby when there were so many other responsibilities they needed to focus on?
Even now, she knew that she wasn't ready for children. But all she could think about was a little girl with her smile, a little boy with his eyes, and the possibility that neither one would ever exist.
Ashleigh pushed down her regret and sadness. She turned her attention back to Alice with frustration.
"You owe me," she said.
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"Are you okay?" Ashleigh asked. Concerned by Alice's demeanor.
Alice tilted her head with a smile.
"Are you worried?" she asked. "About me?"
Ashleigh swallowed and looked away.
"The way you were talking," Ashleigh replied softly. "It sounded like how you used to talk before Axel."
Alice grinned and turned back to Axel.
"Coping mechanisms come in all shapes, sizes, tastes, and colors," she said in a cheery voice.
Alice took a short breath.
"Sometimes, they're wrapped in playful packaging dipped in sarcasm and self-deluded commentary," she continued. "Allowing a separation of self from reality just long enough to take a breath… before it crashes back over you and pulls you down into the cold dark depths."
Ashleigh chewed her bottom lip wishing she hadn't said anything.
"Are you going to say hello?" Alice asked.
Ashleigh lifted her eyes. Alice was still looking at Axel, but she knew the words were directed at her.
"I can leave if you want privacy to speak with him," Alice said softly. "But I prefer to stay close and not be gone long."
Ashleigh stepped forward. She looked down at her big brother lying on the bed as though he were simply napping. A part of her wanted to call out to him. To tell him to stop messing around and get up.
The report had said his leg was badly damaged. That his body was almost encased in ice. His heart stopped. The infection was aggressive and spreading fast. His cold kept it back, but at a steep price. Without Myka's power, the cold would have killed him. And without Bell's blood, his internal damage would have killed him.
In her mind, she saw Caleb staring back at her with eyes full of love as the roots wrapped around his body and yanked him back into the darkness. She clenched her jaw painfully.
Axel should have died that night. But Alice saved him. Myka saved him. Bell saved him.
Caleb only had her.
Ashleigh swallowed and turned away from her brother, looking back to Alice.
"I came to see you," she said.
Alice furrowed her brow and lifted her gaze.
"Me?" she asked.
"Yes," Ashleigh replied. "I need your help."
Alice looked at Ashleigh curiously and then took a deep breath.
"No."
Ashleigh's eyes widened, and she took a sharp breath.
"You don't even know what I need," Ashleigh said.
"I know that whatever it is, it will require me to leave," Alice replied, "knowing you, it will also require me to risk my life."
Ashleigh looked away.
Alice smiled.
"I'm sorry," she whispered.
Ashleigh looked back at her with a furrowed brow. Why was she apologizing?
"I know it doesn't help," Alice said. "But I believe you will find him."
"You do?" Ashleigh whispered.
"I do," Alice replied, reaching out and adjusting the blankets on Axel's bed. "You need Caleb."
Ashleigh stared at Alice. Confusion settled over her. What game was Alice playing? She said she believed that Caleb was alive and that Ashleigh would find him. But she refused to help?
"Then help me," Ashleigh said. "You can find things that no one else can. You know everyone's secrets before they do! You have to know something or someone that can help me bring him back!"
Alice looked up at Ashleigh.
"I gave Galen and Summer complete access to all of the files I had on Spring and Autumn," she said. "They have people combing through every one of them looking for any connection to the ley line or the way gates."
Alice stood from her chair and took a step toward Ashleigh.
"But," she said quietly. "I have to tell you, I never really knew anything about those subjects. As far as I can tell, Autumn had no information about them either, and Spring…."
Alice let out a sigh.
"Chances are very high that nothing useful will be found from those files," she said honestly.
Ashleigh felt the heaviness settling over her chest once more. That feeling that she couldn't take in enough air.
"Take me to Spring!" Ashleigh shouted. "Take me to the mound. Yea, we destroyed it, but it might still have some kind of connection."
"Spring is not safe," Alice said. "For anyone."
"I will protect you," Ashleigh stated firmly.
"Corrine reads those reports to Axel every night," Alice said, "Spring is overrun. As strong as you are, you could not protect yourself, let alone me."
"Fine, but I'm sure you know a way to help us avoid any trouble," Ashleigh insisted.
"Ashleigh," Alice sighed. "I am not leaving Axel, and even if I was willing to do so, I would not endanger my family that way."
Ashleigh's eyes followed the movement of Alice's hand to her belly. She swallowed and chewed the inside of her lip. Corrine had already told her about the pregnancy. But seeing the small bump and how Alice touched it so tenderly made it real.
His warm, playful voice whispered in her ear as the memory played in her mind.
"So, in this scenario," Caleb said, turning his body toward her as he finished the last button of his shirt. "I am trying to protect my wife… and child?"
"I was just saying, if. If you were Galen, that's what you would do."
"Yes," he said, moving toward the bed. "If I was Galen, and if you were Bell."
"Mmhmm," Ashleigh replied.
Caleb kneeled on the bed, and Ashleigh couldn't help but smile as he moved with the grace and focus of a wolf stalking his prey.
Ashleigh laid back in bed, resting her head on the pillows as he crawled over her. He pulled down the sheet. She wore a tank top with no bra. Caleb slipped his fingers under the hem of the shirt, lifting it up just under her breasts.
He leaned forward, his mouth hovering just over her stomach.
Ashleigh chewed her lower lip as her heart picked up its steady rhythm.
"And if you were carrying our own little pup, right here," he whispered. The heat of his breath tickled her and sent small shockwaves shooting over her body.
She drew in a shaky breath as he pressed his lips to the soft flesh of her stomach.
Ashleigh felt the painful tug of another memory pulling itself to the surface.
"I wasn't trying to say we should start planning now, Ash," Caleb said. "Just… that it would be nice, someday."
"Sure," Ashleigh said with a pause. "Someday."
Caleb swallowed and looked at her carefully.
"Ash," he called. "You do… want children, right? I mean, when we talked before… I know you said you weren't ready, and I understand. I am not in a rush, either. But you do want them at some point, right?"
He had looked so hopeful at that moment and so scared.
"I'm just saying… it's not the right time," Ashleigh replied with hesitation. "I'm not quite nineteen, and with all of our responsibilities… I think it's going to take some time. That's all."
"Okay," he replied, turning with a gentle smile. "I understand."
Ashleigh nodded, and they both turned their attention back to the road. She knew he was trying, but she could see the disappointment in his eyes.
At that time, Ashleigh couldn't understand how they could even consider being parents. How could they have a baby when there were so many other responsibilities they needed to focus on?
Even now, she knew that she wasn't ready for children. But all she could think about was a little girl with her smile, a little boy with his eyes, and the possibility that neither one would ever exist.
Ashleigh pushed down her regret and sadness. She turned her attention back to Alice with frustration.
"You owe me," she said.
"Are you okay?" Ashleigh asked. Concerned by Alice's demeanor.Alice tilted her head with a smile."Are you worried?" she asked. "About me?"Ashleigh swallowed and looked away."The way you were talking," Ashleigh replied softly. "It sounded like how you used to talk before Axel."Alice grinned and turned back to Axel."Coping mechanisms come in all shapes, sizes, tastes, and colors," she said in a cheery voice.Alice took a short breath."Sometimes, they're wrapped in playful packaging dipped in sarcasm and self-deluded commentary," she continued. "Allowing a separation of self from reality just long enough to take a breath before it crashes back over you and pulls you down into the cold dark depths."Ashleigh chewed her bottom lip wishing she hadn't said anything."Are you going to say hello?" Alice asked.Ashleigh lifted her eyes. Alice was still looking at Axel, but she knew the words were directed at her."I can leave if you want privacy to speak with him," Alice said softly. "But I prefer to stay close and not be gone long."Ashleigh stepped forward. She looked down at her big brother lying on the bed as though he were simply napping. A part of her wanted to call out to him. To tell him to stop messing around and get up.The report had said his leg was badly damaged. That his body was almost encased in ice. His heart stopped. The infection was aggressive and spreading fast. His cold kept it back, but at a steep price. Without Myka's power, the cold would have killed him. And without Bell's blood, his internal damage would have killed him.In her mind, she saw Caleb staring back at her with eyes full of love as the roots wrapped around his body and yanked him back into the darkness. She clenched her jaw painfully.Axel should have died that night. But Alice saved him. Myka saved him. Bell saved him.Caleb only had her.Ashleigh swallowed and turned away from her brother, looking back to Alice."I came to see you," she said.Alice furrowed her brow and lifted her gaze."Me?" she asked."Yes," Ashleigh replied. "I need your help."Alice looked at Ashleigh curiously and then took a deep breath."No."Ashleigh's eyes widened, and she took a sharp breath."You don't even know what I need," Ashleigh said."I know that whatever it is, it will require me to leave," Alice replied, "knowing you, it will also require me to risk my life."Ashleigh looked away.Alice smiled."I'm sorry," she whispered.Ashleigh looked back at her with a furrowed brow. Why was she apologizing?"I know it doesn't help," Alice said. "But I believe you will find him.""You do?" Ashleigh whispered."I do," Alice replied, reaching out and adjusting the blankets on Axel's bed. "You need Caleb."Ashleigh stared at Alice. Confusion settled over her. What game was Alice playing? She said she believed that Caleb was alive and that Ashleigh would find him. But she refused to help?"Then help me," Ashleigh said. "You can find things that no one else can. You know everyone's secrets before they do! You have to know something or someone that can help me bring him back!"Alice looked up at Ashleigh."I gave Galen and Summer complete access to all of the files I had on Spring and Autumn," she said. "They have people combing through every one of them looking for any connection to the ley line or the way gates."Alice stood from her chair and took a step toward Ashleigh."But," she said quietly. "I have to tell you, I never really knew anything about those subjects. As far as I can tell, Autumn had no information about them either, and Spring."Alice let out a sigh."Chances are very high that nothing useful will be found from those files," she said honestly.Ashleigh felt the heaviness settling over her chest once more. That feeling that she couldn't take in enough air."Take me to Spring!" Ashleigh shouted. "Take me to the mound. Yea, we destroyed it, but it might still have some kind of connection.""Spring is not safe," Alice said. "For anyone." "I will protect you," Ashleigh stated firmly."Corrine reads those reports to Axel every night," Alice said, "Spring is overrun. As strong as you are, you could not protect yourself, let alone me.""Fine, but I'm sure you know a way to help us avoid any trouble," Ashleigh insisted."Ashleigh," Alice sighed. "I am not leaving Axel, and even if I was willing to do so, I would not endanger my family that way."Ashleigh's eyes followed the movement of Alice's hand to her belly. She swallowed and chewed the inside of her lip. Corrine had already told her about the pregnancy. But seeing the small bump and how Alice touched it so tenderly made it real.His warm, playful voice whispered in her ear as the memory played in her mind."So, in this scenario," Caleb said, turning his body toward her as he finished the last button of his shirt. "I am trying to protect my wife and child?""I was just saying, if. If you were Galen, that's what you would do.""Yes," he said, moving toward the bed. "If I was Galen, and if you were Bell.""Mmhmm," Ashleigh replied.Caleb kneeled on the bed, and Ashleigh couldn't help but smile as he moved with the grace and focus of a wolf stalking his prey.Ashleigh laid back in bed, resting her head on the pillows as he crawled over her. He pulled down the sheet. She wore a tank top with no bra. Caleb slipped his fingers under the hem of the shirt, lifting it up just under her breasts.He leaned forward, his mouth hovering just over her stomach.Ashleigh chewed her lower lip as her heart picked up its steady rhythm."And if you were carrying our own little pup, right here," he whispered. The heat of his breath tickled her and sent small shockwaves shooting over her body.She drew in a shaky breath as he pressed his lips to the soft flesh of her stomach.Ashleigh felt the painful tug of another memory pulling itself to the surface."I wasn't trying to say we should start planning now, Ash," Caleb said. "Just that it would be nice, someday.""Sure," Ashleigh said with a pause. "Someday."Caleb swallowed and looked at her carefully."Ash," he called. "You do want children, right? I mean, when we talked before I know you said you weren't ready, and I understand. I am not in a rush, either. But you do want them at some point, right?"He had looked so hopeful at that moment and so scared."I'm just saying it's not the right time," Ashleigh replied with hesitation. "I'm not quite nineteen, and with all of our responsibilities I think it's going to take some time. That's all.""Okay," he replied, turning with a gentle smile. "I understand."Ashleigh nodded, and they both turned their attention back to the road. She knew he was trying, but she could see the disappointment in his eyes.At that time, Ashleigh couldn't understand how they could even consider being parents. How could they have a baby when there were so many other responsibilities they needed to focus on?Even now, she knew that she wasn't ready for children. But all she could think about was a little girl with her smile, a little boy with his eyes, and the possibility that neither one would ever exist.Ashleigh pushed down her regret and sadness. She turned her attention back to Alice with frustration."You owe me," she said.
