Chapter 424: 424
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Gradually, the strength returned to the body, the cold limbs felt the temperature again, and the spike-like touch felt like a tide, but it finally warmed up gradually; but the stomach was cold and cold, as if tossed a few. A hockey puck usually goes in, and it keeps falling heavily.
Reluctantly supported and stood up, but found that his legs and knees were trembling slightly, and the whole person showed a state of disengagement, opened the door of the compartment, staggered to the side of the sink, and then you could see The sweaty, messy hair and pale face in the mirror seemed to have just walked out of hell, and the corners of his mouth couldn't help but sketched out a wry smile of sarcasm.
Even when filming "Buried alive", even when he was in the coffin for eight hours, even when he was physically confronted with Van Diesel, he was never so embarrassed. But today, he is completely messed up, feeling that all the lines of defense of the whole person have been completely defeated, and it is almost impossible to fight back, even without the strength to fight back.
But this is not unusual, is it?
Because all this is really too real, for him, this is not a movie, this is life.
He understands the depression that sinks slowly but can't call for help, he understands the difficulty of eager to survive but is helpless, he understands the numbness of death close but indifferent, he is Chu Jiashu, and he is also Adam. No effort is required at all, and it is easy to get trapped in that chaotic space again, ups and downs.
The eyes in the mirror were broken, listless and lifeless. They were so ugly that they couldn't look directly at him. He couldn't help but lifted his right hand and swiped across the mirror, trying to delete the image, but only a row of fingers remained. The watermark made the projection blurred, and the face changed into six or seven broken pictures, just like the moon in the mirror.
Turn on the faucet, splash cold water on your cheeks to wash away the sweat, rubbing your cheeks vigorously, trying to make yourself sober, but then I realize that he is so sober and has always been so sober, because those memories are too real. There never seems to be an instant that is false.
The start is full of coldness, the skin temperature still has not been able to recover, almost can't feel the existence of blood vessels; that is almost a vampire touch, the desolation and recklessness of the undead surging.
Looking at the gently shaking hands, Lan Li suddenly understood. All that was just a side effect of chemotherapy.
But... side effects of chemotherapy? How ridiculous.
First, he did not have cancer; second, he did not receive chemotherapy; third, his body did not even have a big problem. But he is suffering from the side effects of chemotherapy? This is simply absurd! It's ridiculous! Nonsense!
The smile at the corner of his mouth could not help but tugged, and he mocked himself, but it rose halfway up, but stopped abruptly when he looked at himself in the mirror: this is not impossible.
It's like a pregnant couple. When the wife is pregnant, the husband, in order to show consideration and care, begins to adjust his life habits to the same pattern as his wife, such as getting up and rest, fitness methods, and even eating habits.
In certain specific psychological resonance situations, the husband may also experience "pregnancy" symptoms, including general conditions such as morning sickness and nausea, and may even experience conscious fetal movement and abdominal swelling, which completely simulates the wife's pregnancy.
This phenomenon has been confirmed by medicine, and there have been many cases in real life.
Everything is too real and too close, so that the body feels the psychological cues and starts to react accordingly, completely blurring the boundary between reality and hypothesis, and making the hypothetical situation evolve into reality. So, is this the way he is now?
He really felt the erosion of cancer, he really felt the invasion of chemotherapy, all of this was just like the previous life, the slow sinking suffocation, like death's right hand, grabbing He closed his neck, slowly closed it, and then killed all hope of life.
So, is he really crazy now? Illusion and reality have been completely integrated, just like in "Trumen's World", the illusion on TV has become the reality of his own life.
He exists, but he does not exist. He is a man-made real person. He has flesh and blood, personality and corners. He is indistinguishable from the real and the real is difficult to distinguish. But everything he has is controlled in the hands of "God". So, can he go out of this absurd reality reality show like Truman?
He raised his head again and looked at himself in the mirror, with drops of water hanging on his cheeks, still not seeing too much blood in his paleness, and all the brilliance was lost in those quiet eyes. He twitched the corner of his mouth, revealing a big smile, but there was no movement in the bottom of his eyes, and the unfathomable gloomy light reflected the vitality of the unborn machine.
He knew that in the depths, in the depths of his eyes, in the bottomless abyss of his eyes, a pair of invisible giant hands were dragging his legs and sinking, gradually moving away from the water, and the vitality was just like that little by little. Dissipated in the pitch-black lake until it disappeared completely.
This is the tumor talking.
He told himself that this was not his true thoughts, nor his true condition. All of this was just the tumor talking, the tumor called Adam.
All this is true. He is Lan Li, who is shooting a movie called "The Anti-Cancer Me"; he used to be Chu Jiashu, lying in a hospital bed/paralyzed for ten years; he is playing Adam , Has cancer and is undergoing chemotherapy; his realistic prototype is Will, the screenwriter of the movie, and successfully got rid of the entanglement of cancer.
This is all true. His thoughts were extremely clear.
However, the boundary between reality and illusion is nowhere to be found. He is not sure if this is on the set of "Anti-Cancer Me". He remembers that there is a scene in which Adam vomits in the bathroom; he is also not sure if this is a return. In the memory of the previous life, he remembered that the icy cold feeling when he died was not from the body, but from the soul; he was still not sure if it was his own true situation. His body became weak.
He tried to find his true self in the mirror. But I can't tell which one is the real self. Lan Li? Adam? Chu Jiashu? Which "self" should he look for in order to regain a foothold on the track of real life?
This is not normal. It was as abnormal as if he had experienced side effects of chemotherapy just now. So, this must be the tumor talking. When the tumor speaks, it's like the "Harry Potter" story, the trees can speak, and the hat can speak. It's all illusory, but it's all real.
It must be so. He was calm and not panicked at all. There is no such thing as a "buried alive" period, and even the dream and the set can't be distinguished. He is very awake now, and he needs to continue to stay awake.
Opening his eyes again, looking at the familiar face in the mirror, he said, "It is now in 2011, February 20th, in the afternoon, and I am in Seattle, filming'anti-cancer me'. I am an actor. , I'm filming, all of this is filming."
After speaking, he paused for a while, repeated all the words again, then paused again, and looked at himself in the mirror seriously, but the phrase "I am Lan Li" whirled on the tip of his tongue, anyway. He couldn't tell, in the end, he gave up altogether, took out two pieces of paper, wiped all the water drops on his cheeks, and let out a long breath, the whole person finally recovered a little.
Stepped forward again, left the bathroom, and then saw Seth and Will standing at the door.
Both of them had deep concerns on their faces. The nervous expressions did not hide anything at all. They wanted a few words of authority, but they didn't know where to start. The result was that they were not embarrassed and froze in place. It looks like a friend has just told them that he has cancer. Apart from an expression of "sorry" on his face, he doesn't know what to do.
Lan Li thought this was really funny, and the smile at the corner of his mouth could not help but rose, "Go ahead, I will sit down and rest for a while, and then follow." Now the limbs still don't feel much strength, the whole person There is a feeling of loss of strength~www.novelhall.com~ He needs to catch his breath.
"Are you okay?" Seth still didn't hold back, and asked cautiously, as if Lan Li was a fragile porcelain doll.
Will standing next to him also had a heavy face, but he did not speak, but looked at Lan Li firmly, the faint light revealed a trace of firmness and hope. The power of that belief awakened the resonance of Lan Li, and between the eyes, there was a tacit understanding of the same people.
"I'm fine." Lan Li smiled and nodded to Seth, "I just had a stomach upset just now, so I took care of it a little bit. Now, what I need most is to sit down and rest alone, alone." When Si made a request, Lan Li took the initiative to emphasize the "alone" matter, "I'm serious, you guys go over quickly."
Looking at the two big guys who were unwilling to move, Lan Li couldn't help but smile, "This is the hospital. The medical staff are always coming and going. This should be the place where you least need to worry about me. Don't worry, I have no plans. Take the risk of your own life."
Seth had a weird feeling. For a moment, he felt that Lanly was speaking; but the next moment, he felt that it was Adam who was speaking. That kind of vague feeling even makes it difficult to distinguish whether this is reality or a movie. He has the most opponents with Adam in the movie. He always feels that this scene just now seems to have happened in the script.
Seth scratched his head, hesitated for a moment, and then cast questioning gazes at Will. After the two nodded their heads, they stepped forward reluctantly. But after all, it was unavoidable to worry, and looked back, only to see that Lan Li walked to the bench next to him, sat down, and relaxed.
Seth felt a little relieved now, and Will dragged his arm and whispered, "Let's go, he'll be fine."
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Gradually, the strength returned to the body, the cold limbs felt the temperature again, and the spike-like touch felt like a tide, but it finally warmed up gradually; but the stomach was cold and cold, as if tossed a few. A hockey puck usually goes in, and it keeps falling heavily.
Reluctantly supported and stood up, but found that his legs and knees were trembling slightly, and the whole person showed a state of disengagement, opened the door of the compartment, staggered to the side of the sink, and then you could see The sweaty, messy hair and pale face in the mirror seemed to have just walked out of hell, and the corners of his mouth couldn't help but sketched out a wry smile of sarcasm.
Even when filming "Buried alive", even when he was in the coffin for eight hours, even when he was physically confronted with Van Diesel, he was never so embarrassed. But today, he is completely messed up, feeling that all the lines of defense of the whole person have been completely defeated, and it is almost impossible to fight back, even without the strength to fight back.
But this is not unusual, is it?
Because all this is really too real, for him, this is not a movie, this is life.
He understands the depression that sinks slowly but can't call for help, he understands the difficulty of eager to survive but is helpless, he understands the numbness of death close but indifferent, he is Chu Jiashu, and he is also Adam. No effort is required at all, and it is easy to get trapped in that chaotic space again, ups and downs.
The eyes in the mirror were broken, listless and lifeless. They were so ugly that they couldn't look directly at him. He couldn't help but lifted his right hand and swiped across the mirror, trying to delete the image, but only a row of fingers remained. The watermark made the projection blurred, and the face changed into six or seven broken pictures, just like the moon in the mirror.
Turn on the faucet, splash cold water on your cheeks to wash away the sweat, rubbing your cheeks vigorously, trying to make yourself sober, but then I realize that he is so sober and has always been so sober, because those memories are too real. There never seems to be an instant that is false.
The start is full of coldness, the skin temperature still has not been able to recover, almost can't feel the existence of blood vessels; that is almost a vampire touch, the desolation and recklessness of the undead surging.
Looking at the gently shaking hands, Lan Li suddenly understood. All that was just a side effect of chemotherapy.
But... side effects of chemotherapy? How ridiculous.
First, he did not have cancer; second, he did not receive chemotherapy; third, his body did not even have a big problem. But he is suffering from the side effects of chemotherapy? This is simply absurd! It's ridiculous! Nonsense!
The smile at the corner of his mouth could not help but tugged, and he mocked himself, but it rose halfway up, but stopped abruptly when he looked at himself in the mirror: this is not impossible.
It's like a pregnant couple. When the wife is pregnant, the husband, in order to show consideration and care, begins to adjust his life habits to the same pattern as his wife, such as getting up and rest, fitness methods, and even eating habits.
In certain specific psychological resonance situations, the husband may also experience "pregnancy" symptoms, including general conditions such as morning sickness and nausea, and may even experience conscious fetal movement and abdominal swelling, which completely simulates the wife's pregnancy.
This phenomenon has been confirmed by medicine, and there have been many cases in real life.
Everything is too real and too close, so that the body feels the psychological cues and starts to react accordingly, completely blurring the boundary between reality and hypothesis, and making the hypothetical situation evolve into reality. So, is this the way he is now?
He really felt the erosion of cancer, he really felt the invasion of chemotherapy, all of this was just like the previous life, the slow sinking suffocation, like death's right hand, grabbing He closed his neck, slowly closed it, and then killed all hope of life.
So, is he really crazy now? Illusion and reality have been completely integrated, just like in "Trumen's World", the illusion on TV has become the reality of his own life.
He exists, but he does not exist. He is a man-made real person. He has flesh and blood, personality and corners. He is indistinguishable from the real and the real is difficult to distinguish. But everything he has is controlled in the hands of "God". So, can he go out of this absurd reality reality show like Truman?
He raised his head again and looked at himself in the mirror, with drops of water hanging on his cheeks, still not seeing too much blood in his paleness, and all the brilliance was lost in those quiet eyes. He twitched the corner of his mouth, revealing a big smile, but there was no movement in the bottom of his eyes, and the unfathomable gloomy light reflected the vitality of the unborn machine.
He knew that in the depths, in the depths of his eyes, in the bottomless abyss of his eyes, a pair of invisible giant hands were dragging his legs and sinking, gradually moving away from the water, and the vitality was just like that little by little. Dissipated in the pitch-black lake until it disappeared completely.
This is the tumor talking.
He told himself that this was not his true thoughts, nor his true condition. All of this was just the tumor talking, the tumor called Adam.
All this is true. He is Lan Li, who is shooting a movie called "The Anti-Cancer Me"; he used to be Chu Jiashu, lying in a hospital bed/paralyzed for ten years; he is playing Adam , Has cancer and is undergoing chemotherapy; his realistic prototype is Will, the screenwriter of the movie, and successfully got rid of the entanglement of cancer.
This is all true. His thoughts were extremely clear.
However, the boundary between reality and illusion is nowhere to be found. He is not sure if this is on the set of "Anti-Cancer Me". He remembers that there is a scene in which Adam vomits in the bathroom; he is also not sure if this is a return. In the memory of the previous life, he remembered that the icy cold feeling when he died was not from the body, but from the soul; he was still not sure if it was his own true situation. His body became weak.
He tried to find his true self in the mirror. But I can't tell which one is the real self. Lan Li? Adam? Chu Jiashu? Which "self" should he look for in order to regain a foothold on the track of real life?
This is not normal. It was as abnormal as if he had experienced side effects of chemotherapy just now. So, this must be the tumor talking. When the tumor speaks, it's like the "Harry Potter" story, the trees can speak, and the hat can speak. It's all illusory, but it's all real.
It must be so. He was calm and not panicked at all. There is no such thing as a "buried alive" period, and even the dream and the set can't be distinguished. He is very awake now, and he needs to continue to stay awake.
Opening his eyes again, looking at the familiar face in the mirror, he said, "It is now in 2011, February 20th, in the afternoon, and I am in Seattle, filming'anti-cancer me'. I am an actor. , I'm filming, all of this is filming."
After speaking, he paused for a while, repeated all the words again, then paused again, and looked at himself in the mirror seriously, but the phrase "I am Lan Li" whirled on the tip of his tongue, anyway. He couldn't tell, in the end, he gave up altogether, took out two pieces of paper, wiped all the water drops on his cheeks, and let out a long breath, the whole person finally recovered a little.
Stepped forward again, left the bathroom, and then saw Seth and Will standing at the door.
Both of them had deep concerns on their faces. The nervous expressions did not hide anything at all. They wanted a few words of authority, but they didn't know where to start. The result was that they were not embarrassed and froze in place. It looks like a friend has just told them that he has cancer. Apart from an expression of "sorry" on his face, he doesn't know what to do.
Lan Li thought this was really funny, and the smile at the corner of his mouth could not help but rose, "Go ahead, I will sit down and rest for a while, and then follow." Now the limbs still don't feel much strength, the whole person There is a feeling of loss of strength~www.novelhall.com~ He needs to catch his breath.
"Are you okay?" Seth still didn't hold back, and asked cautiously, as if Lan Li was a fragile porcelain doll.
Will standing next to him also had a heavy face, but he did not speak, but looked at Lan Li firmly, the faint light revealed a trace of firmness and hope. The power of that belief awakened the resonance of Lan Li, and between the eyes, there was a tacit understanding of the same people.
"I'm fine." Lan Li smiled and nodded to Seth, "I just had a stomach upset just now, so I took care of it a little bit. Now, what I need most is to sit down and rest alone, alone." When Si made a request, Lan Li took the initiative to emphasize the "alone" matter, "I'm serious, you guys go over quickly."
Looking at the two big guys who were unwilling to move, Lan Li couldn't help but smile, "This is the hospital. The medical staff are always coming and going. This should be the place where you least need to worry about me. Don't worry, I have no plans. Take the risk of your own life."
Seth had a weird feeling. For a moment, he felt that Lanly was speaking; but the next moment, he felt that it was Adam who was speaking. That kind of vague feeling even makes it difficult to distinguish whether this is reality or a movie. He has the most opponents with Adam in the movie. He always feels that this scene just now seems to have happened in the script.
Seth scratched his head, hesitated for a moment, and then cast questioning gazes at Will. After the two nodded their heads, they stepped forward reluctantly. But after all, it was unavoidable to worry, and looked back, only to see that Lan Li walked to the bench next to him, sat down, and relaxed.
Seth felt a little relieved now, and Will dragged his arm and whispered, "Let's go, he'll be fine."
Gradually, the strength returned to the body, the cold limbs felt the temperature again, and the spike-like touch felt like a tide, but it finally warmed up gradually; but the stomach was cold and cold, as if tossed a few. A hockey puck usually goes in, and it keeps falling heavily.Reluctantly supported and stood up, but found that his legs and knees were trembling slightly, and the whole person showed a state of disengagement, opened the door of the compartment, staggered to the side of the sink, and then you could see The sweaty, messy hair and pale face in the mirror seemed to have just walked out of hell, and the corners of his mouth couldn't help but sketched out a wry smile of sarcasm.Even when filming "Buried alive", even when he was in the coffin for eight hours, even when he was physically confronted with Van Diesel, he was never so embarrassed. But today, he is completely messed up, feeling that all the lines of defense of the whole person have been completely defeated, and it is almost impossible to fight back, even without the strength to fight back.But this is not unusual, is it?Because all this is really too real, for him, this is not a movie, this is life.He understands the depression that sinks slowly but can't call for help, he understands the difficulty of eager to survive but is helpless, he understands the numbness of death close but indifferent, he is Chu Jiashu, and he is also Adam. No effort is required at all, and it is easy to get trapped in that chaotic space again, ups and downs.The eyes in the mirror were broken, listless and lifeless. They were so ugly that they couldn't look directly at him. He couldn't help but lifted his right hand and swiped across the mirror, trying to delete the image, but only a row of fingers remained. The watermark made the projection blurred, and the face changed into six or seven broken pictures, just like the moon in the mirror.Turn on the faucet, splash cold water on your cheeks to wash away the sweat, rubbing your cheeks vigorously, trying to make yourself sober, but then I realize that he is so sober and has always been so sober, because those memories are too real. There never seems to be an instant that is false.The start is full of coldness, the skin temperature still has not been able to recover, almost can't feel the existence of blood vessels; that is almost a vampire touch, the desolation and recklessness of the undead surging.Looking at the gently shaking hands, Lan Li suddenly understood. All that was just a side effect of chemotherapy.But... side effects of chemotherapy? How ridiculous.First, he did not have cancer; second, he did not receive chemotherapy; third, his body did not even have a big problem. But he is suffering from the side effects of chemotherapy? This is simply absurd! It's ridiculous! Nonsense!The smile at the corner of his mouth could not help but tugged, and he mocked himself, but it rose halfway up, but stopped abruptly when he looked at himself in the mirror: this is not impossible.It's like a pregnant couple. When the wife is pregnant, the husband, in order to show consideration and care, begins to adjust his life habits to the same pattern as his wife, such as getting up and rest, fitness methods, and even eating habits.In certain specific psychological resonance situations, the husband may also experience "pregnancy" symptoms, including general conditions such as morning sickness and nausea, and may even experience conscious fetal movement and abdominal swelling, which completely simulates the wife's pregnancy.This phenomenon has been confirmed by medicine, and there have been many cases in real life.Everything is too real and too close, so that the body feels the psychological cues and starts to react accordingly, completely blurring the boundary between reality and hypothesis, and making the hypothetical situation evolve into reality. So, is this the way he is now?He really felt the erosion of cancer, he really felt the invasion of chemotherapy, all of this was just like the previous life, the slow sinking suffocation, like death's right hand, grabbing He closed his neck, slowly closed it, and then killed all hope of life.So, is he really crazy now? Illusion and reality have been completely integrated, just like in "Trumen's World", the illusion on TV has become the reality of his own life.He exists, but he does not exist. He is a man-made real person. He has flesh and blood, personality and corners. He is indistinguishable from the real and the real is difficult to distinguish. But everything he has is controlled in the hands of "God". So, can he go out of this absurd reality reality show like Truman?He raised his head again and looked at himself in the mirror, with drops of water hanging on his cheeks, still not seeing too much blood in his paleness, and all the brilliance was lost in those quiet eyes. He twitched the corner of his mouth, revealing a big smile, but there was no movement in the bottom of his eyes, and the unfathomable gloomy light reflected the vitality of the unborn machine.He knew that in the depths, in the depths of his eyes, in the bottomless abyss of his eyes, a pair of invisible giant hands were dragging his legs and sinking, gradually moving away from the water, and the vitality was just like that little by little. Dissipated in the pitch-black lake until it disappeared completely.This is the tumor talking.He told himself that this was not his true thoughts, nor his true condition. All of this was just the tumor talking, the tumor called Adam.All this is true. He is Lan Li, who is shooting a movie called "The Anti-Cancer Me"; he used to be Chu Jiashu, lying in a hospital bed/paralyzed for ten years; he is playing Adam , Has cancer and is undergoing chemotherapy; his realistic prototype is Will, the screenwriter of the movie, and successfully got rid of the entanglement of cancer.This is all true. His thoughts were extremely clear.However, the boundary between reality and illusion is nowhere to be found. He is not sure if this is on the set of "Anti-Cancer Me". He remembers that there is a scene in which Adam vomits in the bathroom; he is also not sure if this is a return. In the memory of the previous life, he remembered that the icy cold feeling when he died was not from the body, but from the soul; he was still not sure if it was his own true situation. His body became weak.He tried to find his true self in the mirror. But I can't tell which one is the real self. Lan Li? Adam? Chu Jiashu? Which "self" should he look for in order to regain a foothold on the track of real life?This is not normal. It was as abnormal as if he had experienced side effects of chemotherapy just now. So, this must be the tumor talking. When the tumor speaks, it's like the "Harry Potter" story, the trees can speak, and the hat can speak. It's all illusory, but it's all real.It must be so. He was calm and not panicked at all. There is no such thing as a "buried alive" period, and even the dream and the set can't be distinguished. He is very awake now, and he needs to continue to stay awake.Opening his eyes again, looking at the familiar face in the mirror, he said, "It is now in 2011, February 20th, in the afternoon, and I am in Seattle, filming'anti-cancer me'. I am an actor. , I'm filming, all of this is filming."After speaking, he paused for a while, repeated all the words again, then paused again, and looked at himself in the mirror seriously, but the phrase "I am Lan Li" whirled on the tip of his tongue, anyway. He couldn't tell, in the end, he gave up altogether, took out two pieces of paper, wiped all the water drops on his cheeks, and let out a long breath, the whole person finally recovered a little.Stepped forward again, left the bathroom, and then saw Seth and Will standing at the door.Both of them had deep concerns on their faces. The nervous expressions did not hide anything at all. They wanted a few words of authority, but they didn't know where to start. The result was that they were not embarrassed and froze in place. It looks like a friend has just told them that he has cancer. Apart from an expression of "sorry" on his face, he doesn't know what to do.Lan Li thought this was really funny, and the smile at the corner of his mouth could not help but rose, "Go ahead, I will sit down and rest for a while, and then follow." Now the limbs still don't feel much strength, the whole person There is a feeling of loss of strength~www.novelhall.com~ He needs to catch his breath."Are you okay?" Seth still didn't hold back, and asked cautiously, as if Lan Li was a fragile porcelain doll.Will standing next to him also had a heavy face, but he did not speak, but looked at Lan Li firmly, the faint light revealed a trace of firmness and hope. The power of that belief awakened the resonance of Lan Li, and between the eyes, there was a tacit understanding of the same people."I'm fine." Lan Li smiled and nodded to Seth, "I just had a stomach upset just now, so I took care of it a little bit. Now, what I need most is to sit down and rest alone, alone." When Si made a request, Lan Li took the initiative to emphasize the "alone" matter, "I'm serious, you guys go over quickly."Looking at the two big guys who were unwilling to move, Lan Li couldn't help but smile, "This is the hospital. The medical staff are always coming and going. This should be the place where you least need to worry about me. Don't worry, I have no plans. Take the risk of your own life."Seth had a weird feeling. For a moment, he felt that Lanly was speaking; but the next moment, he felt that it was Adam who was speaking. That kind of vague feeling even makes it difficult to distinguish whether this is reality or a movie. He has the most opponents with Adam in the movie. He always feels that this scene just now seems to have happened in the script.Seth scratched his head, hesitated for a moment, and then cast questioning gazes at Will. After the two nodded their heads, they stepped forward reluctantly. But after all, it was unavoidable to worry, and looked back, only to see that Lan Li walked to the bench next to him, sat down, and relaxed.Seth felt a little relieved now, and Will dragged his arm and whispered, "Let's go, he'll be fine."
