“The family you speak of and the family I think of are completely different.”
“Yes, what?”
“No, it’s nothing.”
Aster, who quickly managed his expression, clung to Elusiana’s hand even more as if he were a child.
“I’m sick, Lusi. I need your help.”
“Where? Where are you sick? What can I do for you?”
“Just… stay being like this. This is enough.”
Aster closed his eyes as if it was difficult to say anymore.
Elusiana looked at him still for a while. Aster’s expression seemed relaxed as he closed his eyes as if he had fallen asleep. She gently brushed his hair like her past habit and whispered softly. “Really… I’m really sorry. I mean it.”
Aster, whom she thought had fallen asleep, slowly lifted his eyelids. He gently placed his hand on her hand, smiling lightly. “If you’re that sorry—”
“Huh?”
“Then, stay next to me. Just like before, until I fall asleep.”
“Until you fall asleep…?”
“Yes. I couldn’t sleep a wink last night because of someone.”
The flinching Elusiana’s cheeks were red. She forgot, but until a few hours ago, she was asleep in this bed.
“You’ll stay, right? Lusi.”
“Yes. I’ll be next to you.”
Elusiana, who nodded, brought a chair and sat at the bedside. Aster, who was quietly watching, asked as if he was wondering. “Why bring the chair?”
“Huh?”
“You’re a patient too.”
“…Uh?”
“The patient wants to sit there?”
“…?”
Her brain stopped because she couldn’t keep up with the conversation. He wanted her to stay by his side, but tell her not to sit on the chair? You want me to stand?
“What’s wrong, As?”
Aster, who raised himself, suddenly grabbed and pulled Elusiana’s arm. It seemed like she was pulled slightly, but her body was quickly sucked into the soft bed.
“As!”
“I told you. Please stay by my side like before.”
Elusiana’s heart suddenly skipped a beat. He asked her to stay next to him, so she thought he was asking her to nurse him, but he asked to lie in the same bed together! Of course, when she was young, she would often lie next to him and sleep with him. But it was when she was young, but now she’s all grown up!
Elusiana fumbled and said, turning her head, afraid that he might notice her reddened cheeks. “T-that’s why I said I’d stay by your side.”
“You have to put me to sleep.”
“What?”
Aster pulled the blanket over Elusiana’s chest. Then he lay down next to her and quietly covered himself with the blanket.
At the natural and familiar movement, Elusiana closed her eyes without realizing it. The look in his eyes that looked at her was so kind that she thought he would hear her pounding heart if she looked at him more.
Is this what you really meant when you asked me to stay by your side? S-sleep together?
“Lusi.”
“…Yes?”
“Are you not going to put me to sleep?”
“…”
“Elusiana.”
Elusiana, who was holding her breath, raised herself faster than the bullet. “Ah, I don’t think this is right, As.”
Elusiana, who jumped off the bed, fanned her red face with her hands.
“Why? Did you change your mind?”
“T-that’s not it!”
Elusiana truly felt like her insides were going to explode at Aster’s gentle gaze. A grown man and woman lying down in the same bed? What kind of bullshit is this?
No matter how close we’re like family. Huh. This doesn’t make sense, As! Even if we’re men and women who know each other!
Elusiana sat down after putting the chair away from her bedside.
“Lusi, what are you doing?”
“Why… I don’t think there’s any need for me to sleep next to you. I’ll just stay here. You go to sleep quickly.”
“I like it better when you’re by my side.”
“That’s more! It’s good, but I think I’ll fall asleep first if I lie down there. Haha.”
“Then we can sleep together.”
“…S-still. Wouldn’t that be too much?”
“Are you uncomfortable with me? Because my appearance has changed? Ah. Do you hate this face?”
“No! No! I like it a lot mo— It’s okay. You of the past and you of the present are the same to me.”
“Then, come next to me. Unless you hate me.”
“…”
“Lusi.”
“Yes… Okay.”
Elusiana, who nodded reluctantly, approached the bed. She lifted the thin blanket, carefully lifted her body, and laid down.
“Aster. You know—”
“Sleep well, Lusi.”
“…Yes. Y-you too.”
Aster’s mouth was drawn in an arc as he could see her lying on the bed.
* * *
Elusiana, who slipped out of the room after checking on Aster, who was asleep, swept her chest as soon as she closed the door.
Just like when she was young, she planned to lie still and get out. But before even five minutes had passed, she desperately regretted that thought.
That’s what thoughts are. Once you become conscious, your thoughts take over your mind like a flood.
Every single sound of his body turning. Every sound of his breath. There was no sound that didn’t stimulate her ears. Then, very slightly, their skin touched for a moment, and her brain couldn’t keep up with it.
At that moment.
Thump.
Thump, thump, thump.
Thump, thump, thump.
Her heart started beating like crazy.
From then on, it was like hell. She was afraid that Aster next to her would hear this sound. The more she did, the louder her heart pounded, and eventually she felt dizzy.
It felt like I was walking down a cliff a thousand miles away. If she took one wrong step, her inner thoughts would be revealed. Fortunately or unfortunately, she escaped but couldn’t raise her head due to an unknown sense of guilt.
“To someone who is more like family than my family…”
What did she feel?
Elusiana, who shook her head, clapped her head with both hands. “Get yourself together, Elusiana. As is your family.”
Haahuu, Elusiana took a deep breath, came to her senses, and headed to the first floor. Louis, who had just come up from the first floor, found her at that time.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going to go home. I think my father might be worried.”
“I see. Is His Excellency in the bedroom?”
“Yes. I’m on my way out after checking that he fell asleep.”
“Hmm. I see. Are you leaving right away?”
“Yes.”
Louis nodded affirmatively. “I’ll call the carriage, so please take it.”
“Thank you.”
“Ah, and I sent a small gift for Waieos family.”
“Gift?” Elusiana looked at Louis with a puzzled look.
Louis replied with a big smile. “It’s nothing special. In fact, they’re gifts because no one else could use them, so please don’t feel burdened.”
“Ah.”
I wanted to ask, ‘What’s that?’ but Elusiana swallowed her words to herself. If she thought they’d tell her, they’d tell her before she even asked. And if she refused again— They’ll tell me to throw it away. The ownership of the items has already been transferred to me.
“…Yes. Then, I will accept it gratefully.” Elusiana went down to the first floor, thanking him.
Louis, who even checked that she was leaving the front door on the first floor, turned around and looked suspicious. “That’s strange. He’s not the kind of person who sleeps in broad daylight.”
Tilting his head, Louis headed towards the second-floor bedroom where Aster would be.
* * *
Knock, knock. Louis knocked on Aster’s bedroom door.
“Come in.”
When a short answer came from inside, Louis opened the door and went inside. Bowing politely, he glanced at Aster standing by the window.
“The lady has just departed for her home.”
“Home, right away?”
“Yes, Your Excellency.”
Aster nodded slowly. But he frowned slightly as if he didn’t feel anything right.
“You look uneasy, Your Excellency. Do you have trouble resolving the misunderstanding with the young lady?”
Louis’s worried question deepened the fan wrinkles in Aster’s brow.
He was lost in agony for a moment. Did he have any conversation with Elusiana that led to a misunderstanding?
She looked like she was going to ask a question about the past at any moment and mumbled to herself, ‘Why on earth…!’ Then, she continued, ‘Well, you’ve been fine. It’s a relief that you’re safe, As,’ spoke to her warmly, just like in the old days.
So, should this be accepted as she understands his past mistakes? Is it right to say that the series of processes prepared for her, the desire to be together hidden under the bottom of his heart, was conveyed? If you ask him that—
That’s not it.
Her reaction now was just pretending to go back to the old relationship. It was an attempt to return to that time, that ‘family period’ he had so desperately tried to escape. Or perhaps, even a worse relationship.
At least in the past, she would have confronted him with questions like, ‘Why did you leave without a word?’, ‘I could never have imagined you’d become the head of the Sestein family!’, ‘Explain everything that happened, everything!’, ‘You should be prepared if you can’t explain it properly!’.
“The family you speak of and the family I think of are completely different.”
“Yes, what?”
“No, it’s nothing.”
Aster, who quickly managed his expression, clung to Elusiana’s hand even more as if he were a child.
“I’m sick, Lusi. I need your help.”
“Where? Where are you sick? What can I do for you?”
“Just… stay being like this. This is enough.”
Aster closed his eyes as if it was difficult to say anymore.
Elusiana looked at him still for a while. Aster’s expression seemed relaxed as he closed his eyes as if he had fallen asleep. She gently brushed his hair like her past habit and whispered softly. “Really… I’m really sorry. I mean it.”
Aster, whom she thought had fallen asleep, slowly lifted his eyelids. He gently placed his hand on her hand, smiling lightly. “If you’re that sorry—”
“Huh?”
“Then, stay next to me. Just like before, until I fall asleep.”
“Until you fall asleep…?”
“Yes. I couldn’t sleep a wink last night because of someone.”
The flinching Elusiana’s cheeks were red. She forgot, but until a few hours ago, she was asleep in this bed.
“You’ll stay, right? Lusi.”
“Yes. I’ll be next to you.”
Elusiana, who nodded, brought a chair and sat at the bedside. Aster, who was quietly watching, asked as if he was wondering. “Why bring the chair?”
“Huh?”
“You’re a patient too.”
“…Uh?”
“The patient wants to sit there?”
“…?”
Her brain stopped because she couldn’t keep up with the conversation. He wanted her to stay by his side, but tell her not to sit on the chair? You want me to stand?
“What’s wrong, As?”
Aster, who raised himself, suddenly grabbed and pulled Elusiana’s arm. It seemed like she was pulled slightly, but her body was quickly sucked into the soft bed.
“As!”
“I told you. Please stay by my side like before.”
Elusiana’s heart suddenly skipped a beat. He asked her to stay next to him, so she thought he was asking her to nurse him, but he asked to lie in the same bed together! Of course, when she was young, she would often lie next to him and sleep with him. But it was when she was young, but now she’s all grown up!
Elusiana fumbled and said, turning her head, afraid that he might notice her reddened cheeks. “T-that’s why I said I’d stay by your side.”
“You have to put me to sleep.”
“What?”
Aster pulled the blanket over Elusiana’s chest. Then he lay down next to her and quietly covered himself with the blanket.
At the natural and familiar movement, Elusiana closed her eyes without realizing it. The look in his eyes that looked at her was so kind that she thought he would hear her pounding heart if she looked at him more.
Is this what you really meant when you asked me to stay by your side? S-sleep together?
“Lusi.”
“…Yes?”
“Are you not going to put me to sleep?”
“…”
“Elusiana.”
Elusiana, who was holding her breath, raised herself faster than the bullet. “Ah, I don’t think this is right, As.”
Elusiana, who jumped off the bed, fanned her red face with her hands.
“Why? Did you change your mind?”
“T-that’s not it!”
Elusiana truly felt like her insides were going to explode at Aster’s gentle gaze. A grown man and woman lying down in the same bed? What kind of bullshit is this?
No matter how close we’re like family. Huh. This doesn’t make sense, As! Even if we’re men and women who know each other!
Elusiana sat down after putting the chair away from her bedside.
“Lusi, what are you doing?”
“Why… I don’t think there’s any need for me to sleep next to you. I’ll just stay here. You go to sleep quickly.”
“I like it better when you’re by my side.”
“That’s more! It’s good, but I think I’ll fall asleep first if I lie down there. Haha.”
“Then we can sleep together.”
“…S-still. Wouldn’t that be too much?”
“Are you uncomfortable with me? Because my appearance has changed? Ah. Do you hate this face?”
“No! No! I like it a lot mo— It’s okay. You of the past and you of the present are the same to me.”
“Then, come next to me. Unless you hate me.”
“…”
“Lusi.”
“Yes… Okay.”
Elusiana, who nodded reluctantly, approached the bed. She lifted the thin blanket, carefully lifted her body, and laid down.
“Aster. You know—”
“Sleep well, Lusi.”
“…Yes. Y-you too.”
Aster’s mouth was drawn in an arc as he could see her lying on the bed.
* * *
Elusiana, who slipped out of the room after checking on Aster, who was asleep, swept her chest as soon as she closed the door.
Just like when she was young, she planned to lie still and get out. But before even five minutes had passed, she desperately regretted that thought.
That’s what thoughts are. Once you become conscious, your thoughts take over your mind like a flood.
Every single sound of his body turning. Every sound of his breath. There was no sound that didn’t stimulate her ears. Then, very slightly, their skin touched for a moment, and her brain couldn’t keep up with it.
At that moment.
Thump.
Thump, thump, thump.
Thump, thump, thump.
Her heart started beating like crazy.
From then on, it was like hell. She was afraid that Aster next to her would hear this sound. The more she did, the louder her heart pounded, and eventually she felt dizzy.
It felt like I was walking down a cliff a thousand miles away. If she took one wrong step, her inner thoughts would be revealed. Fortunately or unfortunately, she escaped but couldn’t raise her head due to an unknown sense of guilt.
“To someone who is more like family than my family…”
What did she feel?
Elusiana, who shook her head, clapped her head with both hands. “Get yourself together, Elusiana. As is your family.”
Haahuu, Elusiana took a deep breath, came to her senses, and headed to the first floor. Louis, who had just come up from the first floor, found her at that time.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going to go home. I think my father might be worried.”
“I see. Is His Excellency in the bedroom?”
“Yes. I’m on my way out after checking that he fell asleep.”
“Hmm. I see. Are you leaving right away?”
“Yes.”
Louis nodded affirmatively. “I’ll call the carriage, so please take it.”
“Thank you.”
“Ah, and I sent a small gift for Waieos family.”
“Gift?” Elusiana looked at Louis with a puzzled look.
Louis replied with a big smile. “It’s nothing special. In fact, they’re gifts because no one else could use them, so please don’t feel burdened.”
“Ah.”
I wanted to ask, ‘What’s that?’ but Elusiana swallowed her words to herself. If she thought they’d tell her, they’d tell her before she even asked. And if she refused again— They’ll tell me to throw it away. The ownership of the items has already been transferred to me.
“…Yes. Then, I will accept it gratefully.” Elusiana went down to the first floor, thanking him.
Louis, who even checked that she was leaving the front door on the first floor, turned around and looked suspicious. “That’s strange. He’s not the kind of person who sleeps in broad daylight.”
Tilting his head, Louis headed towards the second-floor bedroom where Aster would be.
* * *
Knock, knock. Louis knocked on Aster’s bedroom door.
“Come in.”
When a short answer came from inside, Louis opened the door and went inside. Bowing politely, he glanced at Aster standing by the window.
“The lady has just departed for her home.”
“Home, right away?”
“Yes, Your Excellency.”
Aster nodded slowly. But he frowned slightly as if he didn’t feel anything right.
“You look uneasy, Your Excellency. Do you have trouble resolving the misunderstanding with the young lady?”
Louis’s worried question deepened the fan wrinkles in Aster’s brow.
He was lost in agony for a moment. Did he have any conversation with Elusiana that led to a misunderstanding?
She looked like she was going to ask a question about the past at any moment and mumbled to herself, ‘Why on earth…!’ Then, she continued, ‘Well, you’ve been fine. It’s a relief that you’re safe, As,’ spoke to her warmly, just like in the old days.
So, should this be accepted as she understands his past mistakes? Is it right to say that the series of processes prepared for her, the desire to be together hidden under the bottom of his heart, was conveyed? If you ask him that—
That’s not it.
Her reaction now was just pretending to go back to the old relationship. It was an attempt to return to that time, that ‘family period’ he had so desperately tried to escape. Or perhaps, even a worse relationship.
At least in the past, she would have confronted him with questions like, ‘Why did you leave without a word?’, ‘I could never have imagined you’d become the head of the Sestein family!’, ‘Explain everything that happened, everything!’, ‘You should be prepared if you can’t explain it properly!’.
