Chapter 360: 360
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Shen Tianyu shrugged at that. "I'm just trying to explain my viewpoint of things. You, and many people treat it like a big deal but it doesn't seem so in my eyes."
"But society as a whole sees it as an important event, couldn't you at least, act a little more excited?"
"That would just seem ungenuine. Isn't the whole point of your argument about being in love or something? It's not called love unless there's trust and there's no trust in dishonesty."
Bai Yaoxuan stayed quiet at that but Shen Tianyu started speaking on her own without prompting after a moment of silence.
"I get that you're worried why I'm not outwardly half as happy as other people about such an event. I willingly accepted his proposal so there's no need to be concerned about my consent.... It's just that I don't see marriages the same way as other people do, I guess."
Shen Tianyu took a breath and continued. "You know how I grew up. Mother trusted that man but ended up being tossed aside when things got rough. You know, he dangled the promise of marriage in front of my mother when they were still together, that's why mother was reckless enough to do something that resulted in me, multiple times. And yet, that trust came back to bite her in the form of abandonment. Mother was too kind, others may say too naïve or foolish, and decided to have my anyways. Her parents didn't take kindly to her decision. And you know despite all the talk about Women's Rights and Civil Rights, there's still a stigma when it comes to an unmarried woman with a child. Not to mention, Mother's education wasn't even complete when she had to take a break from college to have me. And then, she had two mouths to feed so time didn't allow her to continue pursuing her desired degree. If she was a divorcee, things may have been different but mother was an unmarried, single mother. People treated her with minimal respect, but as soon as she turned away, they would talk about her even if she was still within earshot. Even as a kid, I could feel their... not as bad as to constitute the word 'malicious' but... unkind? stares." Shen Tianyu tilted her head on the bed.
"It wasn't necessarily a social obligation, no matter how you tried to hash it out. The human population can expand just the same even without the concept of marriage, since procreation is the primary method of that and not some ceremony held in the name of gods who might not even exist." Shen Tianyu reached her hand out to pat Bai Yaoxuan's , which was keeping her in a sitting position on the bed. She already feels that the other was going to apologize or something along those lines.
"I had a negative view of marriage, perhaps I still do, I can't really say. Later on, when I grew up, I learned a bit more about marriages and slowly started to understand why people make such a big fuss about it. But I still couldn't connect those discoveries with my earliest memories of my interaction with the word and concept. So, I guess... right now, I'm less negative about it than I was but I'm not exactly positive about it like everyone else. I'm more neutral about it than anything, really." She comfortingly squeezed her sister's hand.
"And there's no need to apologize or feel bad. It had nothing to do with you, and even if you were a bystander as a young child, it's only because you were taught so. Young children are heavily influenced by their parents and adults in their environment. If the adults in your environment talked unfavorably about us, it's only natural for you, as a child, to stay away from us. I don't blame you and there's no need for you to feel sorry. This kind of conversation was bound to come up sooner or later." Shen Tianyu turned on her side and her eyes crinkled into a smile as she looked at her sister. Bai Yaoxuan looked like she wanted to say something but the words were stuck in her throat, while her face had a conflicted expression.
At last, Bai Yaoxuan's brain caught up with her and she decided to utter a thought that had been swirling in her mind. "... Are you going to tell this to Zhu Wangye?"
"Hm... not anytime soon, I don't think. Because then I'd have to talk about my previous life and that's... risky to say the least. From what I remember, both my birth parents and... money bags were married so... But if I had to talk about this issue, I guess I could bring up the useless money bags as an example instead? But I don't really want to think about them more than necessary, really." Shen Tianyu tapped her chin in thought.
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Shen Tianyu shrugged at that. "I'm just trying to explain my viewpoint of things. You, and many people treat it like a big deal but it doesn't seem so in my eyes."
"But society as a whole sees it as an important event, couldn't you at least, act a little more excited?"
"That would just seem ungenuine. Isn't the whole point of your argument about being in love or something? It's not called love unless there's trust and there's no trust in dishonesty."
Bai Yaoxuan stayed quiet at that but Shen Tianyu started speaking on her own without prompting after a moment of silence.
"I get that you're worried why I'm not outwardly half as happy as other people about such an event. I willingly accepted his proposal so there's no need to be concerned about my consent.... It's just that I don't see marriages the same way as other people do, I guess."
Shen Tianyu took a breath and continued. "You know how I grew up. Mother trusted that man but ended up being tossed aside when things got rough. You know, he dangled the promise of marriage in front of my mother when they were still together, that's why mother was reckless enough to do something that resulted in me, multiple times. And yet, that trust came back to bite her in the form of abandonment. Mother was too kind, others may say too naïve or foolish, and decided to have my anyways. Her parents didn't take kindly to her decision. And you know despite all the talk about Women's Rights and Civil Rights, there's still a stigma when it comes to an unmarried woman with a child. Not to mention, Mother's education wasn't even complete when she had to take a break from college to have me. And then, she had two mouths to feed so time didn't allow her to continue pursuing her desired degree. If she was a divorcee, things may have been different but mother was an unmarried, single mother. People treated her with minimal respect, but as soon as she turned away, they would talk about her even if she was still within earshot. Even as a kid, I could feel their... not as bad as to constitute the word 'malicious' but... unkind? stares." Shen Tianyu tilted her head on the bed.
"It wasn't necessarily a social obligation, no matter how you tried to hash it out. The human population can expand just the same even without the concept of marriage, since procreation is the primary method of that and not some ceremony held in the name of gods who might not even exist." Shen Tianyu reached her hand out to pat Bai Yaoxuan's , which was keeping her in a sitting position on the bed. She already feels that the other was going to apologize or something along those lines.
"I had a negative view of marriage, perhaps I still do, I can't really say. Later on, when I grew up, I learned a bit more about marriages and slowly started to understand why people make such a big fuss about it. But I still couldn't connect those discoveries with my earliest memories of my interaction with the word and concept. So, I guess... right now, I'm less negative about it than I was but I'm not exactly positive about it like everyone else. I'm more neutral about it than anything, really." She comfortingly squeezed her sister's hand.
"And there's no need to apologize or feel bad. It had nothing to do with you, and even if you were a bystander as a young child, it's only because you were taught so. Young children are heavily influenced by their parents and adults in their environment. If the adults in your environment talked unfavorably about us, it's only natural for you, as a child, to stay away from us. I don't blame you and there's no need for you to feel sorry. This kind of conversation was bound to come up sooner or later." Shen Tianyu turned on her side and her eyes crinkled into a smile as she looked at her sister. Bai Yaoxuan looked like she wanted to say something but the words were stuck in her throat, while her face had a conflicted expression.
At last, Bai Yaoxuan's brain caught up with her and she decided to utter a thought that had been swirling in her mind. "... Are you going to tell this to Zhu Wangye?"
"Hm... not anytime soon, I don't think. Because then I'd have to talk about my previous life and that's... risky to say the least. From what I remember, both my birth parents and... money bags were married so... But if I had to talk about this issue, I guess I could bring up the useless money bags as an example instead? But I don't really want to think about them more than necessary, really." Shen Tianyu tapped her chin in thought.
Shen Tianyu shrugged at that. "I'm just trying to explain my viewpoint of things. You, and many people treat it like a big deal but it doesn't seem so in my eyes.""But society as a whole sees it as an important event, couldn't you at least, act a little more excited?""That would just seem ungenuine. Isn't the whole point of your argument about being in love or something? It's not called love unless there's trust and there's no trust in dishonesty."Bai Yaoxuan stayed quiet at that but Shen Tianyu started speaking on her own without prompting after a moment of silence."I get that you're worried why I'm not outwardly half as happy as other people about such an event. I willingly accepted his proposal so there's no need to be concerned about my consent.... It's just that I don't see marriages the same way as other people do, I guess."Shen Tianyu took a breath and continued. "You know how I grew up. Mother trusted that man but ended up being tossed aside when things got rough. You know, he dangled the promise of marriage in front of my mother when they were still together, that's why mother was reckless enough to do something that resulted in me, multiple times. And yet, that trust came back to bite her in the form of abandonment. Mother was too kind, others may say too nave or foolish, and decided to have my anyways. Her parents didn't take kindly to her decision. And you know despite all the talk about Women's Rights and Civil Rights, there's still a stigma when it comes to an unmarried woman with a child. Not to mention, Mother's education wasn't even complete when she had to take a break from college to have me. And then, she had two mouths to feed so time didn't allow her to continue pursuing her desired degree. If she was a divorcee, things may have been different but mother was an unmarried, single mother. People treated her with minimal respect, but as soon as she turned away, they would talk about her even if she was still within earshot. Even as a kid, I could feel their... not as bad as to constitute the word 'malicious' but... unkind? stares." Shen Tianyu tilted her head on the bed."It wasn't necessarily a social obligation, no matter how you tried to hash it out. The human population can expand just the same even without the concept of marriage, since procreation is the primary method of that and not some ceremony held in the name of gods who might not even exist." Shen Tianyu reached her hand out to pat Bai Yaoxuan's , which was keeping her in a sitting position on the bed. She already feels that the other was going to apologize or something along those lines."I had a negative view of marriage, perhaps I still do, I can't really say. Later on, when I grew up, I learned a bit more about marriages and slowly started to understand why people make such a big fuss about it. But I still couldn't connect those discoveries with my earliest memories of my interaction with the word and concept. So, I guess... right now, I'm less negative about it than I was but I'm not exactly positive about it like everyone else. I'm more neutral about it than anything, really." She comfortingly squeezed her sister's hand."And there's no need to apologize or feel bad. It had nothing to do with you, and even if you were a bystander as a young child, it's only because you were taught so. Young children are heavily influenced by their parents and adults in their environment. If the adults in your environment talked unfavorably about us, it's only natural for you, as a child, to stay away from us. I don't blame you and there's no need for you to feel sorry. This kind of conversation was bound to come up sooner or later." Shen Tianyu turned on her side and her eyes crinkled into a smile as she looked at her sister. Bai Yaoxuan looked like she wanted to say something but the words were stuck in her throat, while her face had a conflicted expression.At last, Bai Yaoxuan's brain caught up with her and she decided to utter a thought that had been swirling in her mind. "... Are you going to tell this to Zhu Wangye?""Hm... not anytime soon, I don't think. Because then I'd have to talk about my previous life and that's... risky to say the least. From what I remember, both my birth parents and... money bags were married so... But if I had to talk about this issue, I guess I could bring up the useless money bags as an example instead? But I don't really want to think about them more than necessary, really." Shen Tianyu tapped her chin in thought.
