"Well, now that's just beautiful."
If he compiled his current experience into a book, the most appropriate title would be-
[ How To Get Fucked In Every Possible Way (PG-13) (Nosex) ].
Han Xuhan was tired of these disasters that kept striking him in the nuts over and over again.
After proclaiming internally that he would cultivate to the highest level possible and show it off in front of the Celestials above, he had opened the pouch his senior sister had given him earlier that day.
Following the usual tropes, he should've found a few cultivation techniques for beginners inside that could give him a primary boost in his path to becoming a powerful cultivator, except...
There were no cultivation techniques inside.
The pouch held a small booklet, riddled with various rules and tasks an outer court disciple had to learn, abide by and accomplish. Alongside the book were his identity token, a few brightly coloured, polished stones which he assumed to be a form of currency in the world of cultivators, and a peculiar-looking thin piece of jade that was labeled as an emergency contact establishment token.
That was it.
Initially, Xuhan was flabbergasted. He couldn't understand why he hadn't been given any cultivation techniques. Did they forget that he was a mortal?
However, once he decided to read the rulebook first, he understood that if he wanted to become a cultivator, the road ahead was way too slippery and dangerous...
Rule 1:
An outer court disciple has to obey any reasonable order from an inner court disciple / a core disciple / a legacy disciple / a direct disciple/ an elder.
Rule 2:
An outer court disciple must always perform their daily tasks, regardless of their personal issues and shall be punished appropriately if they fail to do so unless vouched for by an elder. They'll be paid a fixed amount of spirit stones as revenues based on the difficulty of the accomplished tasks.
Rule 3:
An outer court disciple must buy their own cultivation techniques from the sect's archives at full price. Only spirit stones will be counted as currency.
Rule 4:
An outer court disciple must accomplish the achievements listed below or risk facing expulsion from the sect.
4.1- reach the second layer of physique transformation within one month
4.2- reach the fifth layer of physique transformation within one year.
4.3- reach the eighth layer of physique transformation within two years.
4.4- reach the peak of the physique transformation realm within three years.
4.5- breakthrough to the Soul Reformation realm within five years.
Rule 5- All outer court disciples must be responsible for their own expenditures and must pay a fixed amount of fees to the sect every two months.
As Xuhan kept reading, more and more complicated and seemingly unfair rules popped up endlessly. How many elders the sect has, what the division of ranks and authorities of those elders was, who was in charge of which mountain peak, what type of food would be served in the sect's kitchen, what the price of the land around the sect's main territory was, etcetera etcetera etcetera...
Although Han Xuhan was greatly dissatisfied with many of the rules that seemed to resemble slave contracts, he still found them bearable.
But afterwards, he reached the part of the book that listed the usual daily tasks of an outer court disciple.
There were many tasks suitable for outer court disciples. For example, delivering shredded logs of at least 50 kilograms to the sect's kitchens, collecting fees from the neighboring smaller sects and organizations using their sect's mighty reputation as an excuse, collecting herbs and crafting materials from dangerous jungles, mines, and whatnot, helping other elders with experimenting on newly developed cultivation techniques and martial arts...
The problem here was that all of these tasks were suitable only for those with exceptional influence outside the sect or someone who has already taken a step into the realm of Physique Transformation.
There was nothing appropriate for a mere mortal like Xuhan!
As stated in the book, the more tasks a disciple accomplished, the more spirit stones would they earn, otherwise, punishment awaited! Did that mean his chances of earning spirit stones and buying his cultivation techniques soon were dashed just like that?
He counted the small number of spirit stones he had found inside the pouch.
25 in number.
Then he looked for the part of the book where the prices of various residential services were listed.
Bi-monthly fee- 20 spirit stones
Archive entrance fee- 2 spirit stones
Monthly food expenditure - 15 spirit stones
Living quarter's fee- 10 spirit stones per month
Toilet maintenance and hygiene product fee- 8 spirit stones per month
By this point, Han Xuhan's rage had reached the high heavens.
Was this still a reputable righteous sect and not a band of bandits?
This is daylight robbery! Even if he could accept most of the fees, what the hell was up with that toilet and hygiene product fee?
He was sure that if he made a fuss about this, the sect would just bar him from entering the toilets of the sect...
A horrifying scenery played itself in his mind uncontrollably--
Bleak dawnlight illuminated the mountains, caressing gently his silhouette, which was rushing towards the closest latrine.
A white figure suddenly appeared out of thin air and blocked his path, his road to salvation.
A saber rose, gleaming in the soothing, soft sunlight, radiating a deathly aura.
Foot-long beard moved as their owner declared, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"
In defiance and desperation, Han Xuhan raised his hands, ready to fight his way to his destination, as befitting of a cultivator!
Then he noticed that all the water inside the bidet he was carrying had fallen out in the process.
"NOOOO!" He screamed in fury, rushing back to the nearest stream to collect water once more.
"Hmph! Go take your dump outside, or pay 8 spirit stones, plus 3 more as a fine for late registration," came the old man's voice from behind, laden with contempt.
Han Xuhan slightly shuddered at the mental image of himself running for a toilet outside the sect's vast territory every morning.
By the time he finished reading the whole book, his heart was shaken deeply.
Then he saw a line written on the back of the book.
This book contains precious information about the sect and was written by the arduous elders of the sect. So it is not free and the reader must pay a tribute of 2 spirit stones to the sect's treasury as soon as possible after reading this.
".....#&#£€¥#!!! "
Han Xuhan temporarily lost his ability to be stunned. With the number of spirit stones in his hand, could he even last a week here?
Other disciples were mostly beginner-level cultivators with much more strength and influence than Xuhan. They would definitely be able to perform those tasks without much issue while Xuhan could only despair.
He remembered the kids present in the bloodline test arguing about how some guys among the examinees had a cultivation level at the third and fourth layers of physique transformation. Would those guys even need to bother with these shitty tasks?
Han Xuhan wanted to cry but had no tears left in his eyes.
But he didn't want to give up so easily. Even if his chances of becoming a cultivator were as minuscule as a single drop of water in an ocean, he knew he had to seize the chance. This world, as far as he was concerned, was an abomination of too many xianxia tropes and apocalyptic events every few years. A mere mortal had no choice but to accept their death or a worse fate in a place like this. And Xuhan still wanted to exact his indirect revenge on the heavens by becoming an immortal celestial.
Rubbing his slightly reddened eyes, he opened the only window of the hut to gaze outside at the vast expanse stretching infinitely from the foot of the mountains where the sect was located. A bright moon stared back at him from the sky for a few seconds before the dark clouds covered it. As the hut plunged into darkness from the absence of the moonlight, Han Xuhan felt a strange mood settle down in his heart.
It was a rather unfamiliar feeling, an intense longing, bordering on the point of obsession. He wanted to become an entity that could gaze at the moon and could blow away any cloud that impeded his vision with a single thought, an entity whose power was beyond fathomable boundaries, just like those super-powerful figures he loved to read about in junk novels in his previous life. Moreover, his curiosity to know exactly what was going on with his rebirth mishap was overflowing his thoughts ceaselessly since his awakening.
Han Xuhan laid back on his bed in the gloomy darkness and steeled his heart for the following day when he would start his duty as an outer court disciple of the Crimson Snow sect. He understood that he had a week's worth of time here, at best, if he didn't find a way to earn spirit stones and perform his daily tasks.
"Well, now that's just beautiful."
If he compiled his current experience into a book, the most appropriate title would be-
[ How To Get Fucked In Every Possible Way (PG-13) (Nosex) ].
Han Xuhan was tired of these disasters that kept striking him in the nuts over and over again.
After proclaiming internally that he would cultivate to the highest level possible and show it off in front of the Celestials above, he had opened the pouch his senior sister had given him earlier that day.
Following the usual tropes, he should've found a few cultivation techniques for beginners inside that could give him a primary boost in his path to becoming a powerful cultivator, except...
There were no cultivation techniques inside.
The pouch held a small booklet, riddled with various rules and tasks an outer court disciple had to learn, abide by and accomplish. Alongside the book were his identity token, a few brightly coloured, polished stones which he assumed to be a form of currency in the world of cultivators, and a peculiar-looking thin piece of jade that was labeled as an emergency contact establishment token.
That was it.
Initially, Xuhan was flabbergasted. He couldn't understand why he hadn't been given any cultivation techniques. Did they forget that he was a mortal?
However, once he decided to read the rulebook first, he understood that if he wanted to become a cultivator, the road ahead was way too slippery and dangerous...
Rule 1:
An outer court disciple has to obey any reasonable order from an inner court disciple / a core disciple / a legacy disciple / a direct disciple/ an elder.
Rule 2:
An outer court disciple must always perform their daily tasks, regardless of their personal issues and shall be punished appropriately if they fail to do so unless vouched for by an elder. They'll be paid a fixed amount of spirit stones as revenues based on the difficulty of the accomplished tasks.
Rule 3:
An outer court disciple must buy their own cultivation techniques from the sect's archives at full price. Only spirit stones will be counted as currency.
Rule 4:
An outer court disciple must accomplish the achievements listed below or risk facing expulsion from the sect.
4.1- reach the second layer of physique transformation within one month
4.2- reach the fifth layer of physique transformation within one year.
4.3- reach the eighth layer of physique transformation within two years.
4.4- reach the peak of the physique transformation realm within three years.
4.5- breakthrough to the Soul Reformation realm within five years.
Rule 5- All outer court disciples must be responsible for their own expenditures and must pay a fixed amount of fees to the sect every two months.
As Xuhan kept reading, more and more complicated and seemingly unfair rules popped up endlessly. How many elders the sect has, what the division of ranks and authorities of those elders was, who was in charge of which mountain peak, what type of food would be served in the sect's kitchen, what the price of the land around the sect's main territory was, etcetera etcetera etcetera...
Although Han Xuhan was greatly dissatisfied with many of the rules that seemed to resemble slave contracts, he still found them bearable.
But afterwards, he reached the part of the book that listed the usual daily tasks of an outer court disciple.
There were many tasks suitable for outer court disciples. For example, delivering shredded logs of at least 50 kilograms to the sect's kitchens, collecting fees from the neighboring smaller sects and organizations using their sect's mighty reputation as an excuse, collecting herbs and crafting materials from dangerous jungles, mines, and whatnot, helping other elders with experimenting on newly developed cultivation techniques and martial arts...
The problem here was that all of these tasks were suitable only for those with exceptional influence outside the sect or someone who has already taken a step into the realm of Physique Transformation.
There was nothing appropriate for a mere mortal like Xuhan!
As stated in the book, the more tasks a disciple accomplished, the more spirit stones would they earn, otherwise, punishment awaited! Did that mean his chances of earning spirit stones and buying his cultivation techniques soon were dashed just like that?
He counted the small number of spirit stones he had found inside the pouch.
25 in number.
Then he looked for the part of the book where the prices of various residential services were listed.
Bi-monthly fee- 20 spirit stones
Archive entrance fee- 2 spirit stones
Monthly food expenditure - 15 spirit stones
Living quarter's fee- 10 spirit stones per month
Toilet maintenance and hygiene product fee- 8 spirit stones per month
By this point, Han Xuhan's rage had reached the high heavens.
Was this still a reputable righteous sect and not a band of bandits?
This is daylight robbery! Even if he could accept most of the fees, what the hell was up with that toilet and hygiene product fee?
He was sure that if he made a fuss about this, the sect would just bar him from entering the toilets of the sect...
A horrifying scenery played itself in his mind uncontrollably--
Bleak dawnlight illuminated the mountains, caressing gently his silhouette, which was rushing towards the closest latrine.
A white figure suddenly appeared out of thin air and blocked his path, his road to salvation.
A saber rose, gleaming in the soothing, soft sunlight, radiating a deathly aura.
Foot-long beard moved as their owner declared, "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"
In defiance and desperation, Han Xuhan raised his hands, ready to fight his way to his destination, as befitting of a cultivator!
Then he noticed that all the water inside the bidet he was carrying had fallen out in the process.
"NOOOO!" He screamed in fury, rushing back to the nearest stream to collect water once more.
"Hmph! Go take your dump outside, or pay 8 spirit stones, plus 3 more as a fine for late registration," came the old man's voice from behind, laden with contempt.
Han Xuhan slightly shuddered at the mental image of himself running for a toilet outside the sect's vast territory every morning.
By the time he finished reading the whole book, his heart was shaken deeply.
Then he saw a line written on the back of the book.
This book contains precious information about the sect and was written by the arduous elders of the sect. So it is not free and the reader must pay a tribute of 2 spirit stones to the sect's treasury as soon as possible after reading this.
".....#&#£€¥#!!! "
Han Xuhan temporarily lost his ability to be stunned. With the number of spirit stones in his hand, could he even last a week here?
Other disciples were mostly beginner-level cultivators with much more strength and influence than Xuhan. They would definitely be able to perform those tasks without much issue while Xuhan could only despair.
He remembered the kids present in the bloodline test arguing about how some guys among the examinees had a cultivation level at the third and fourth layers of physique transformation. Would those guys even need to bother with these shitty tasks?
Han Xuhan wanted to cry but had no tears left in his eyes.
But he didn't want to give up so easily. Even if his chances of becoming a cultivator were as minuscule as a single drop of water in an ocean, he knew he had to seize the chance. This world, as far as he was concerned, was an abomination of too many xianxia tropes and apocalyptic events every few years. A mere mortal had no choice but to accept their death or a worse fate in a place like this. And Xuhan still wanted to exact his indirect revenge on the heavens by becoming an immortal celestial.
Rubbing his slightly reddened eyes, he opened the only window of the hut to gaze outside at the vast expanse stretching infinitely from the foot of the mountains where the sect was located. A bright moon stared back at him from the sky for a few seconds before the dark clouds covered it. As the hut plunged into darkness from the absence of the moonlight, Han Xuhan felt a strange mood settle down in his heart.
It was a rather unfamiliar feeling, an intense longing, bordering on the point of obsession. He wanted to become an entity that could gaze at the moon and could blow away any cloud that impeded his vision with a single thought, an entity whose power was beyond fathomable boundaries, just like those super-powerful figures he loved to read about in junk novels in his previous life. Moreover, his curiosity to know exactly what was going on with his rebirth mishap was overflowing his thoughts ceaselessly since his awakening.
Han Xuhan laid back on his bed in the gloomy darkness and steeled his heart for the following day when he would start his duty as an outer court disciple of the Crimson Snow sect. He understood that he had a week's worth of time here, at best, if he didn't find a way to earn spirit stones and perform his daily tasks.
