Translator: Denryuu; Editor: Ryunakama
I headed for the castle the following day, hoping to find Seraphin there. I had been planning to say hi to King Randolph, but couldn’t find him in his private quarters. Almeria was, as usual, at the orphanage.
『So she’s living in the wine cellar…?』
「It’s more of a storeroom used for wine than a proper cellar. But yes — I believe she was granted a lifetime’s supply of alcohol for being part of the Heroes’ Party.」
『There has to be a limit, isn’t there?』
I thought so too. Among all of us — Almeria, Rina, Elvi, Seraphin and myself — I was usually assumed to be a cut above the rest. Our ace, however, was in fact Seraphin.
『What kind of person is she?』
King Randolph’s servants, who knew me as their master’s friend, did a curt bow as we walked past before continuing on their way.
「She… has the least desirable personality. Almeria behaves like a reckless bull, Rina’s pure-hearted and innocent and Elvi’s extremely down-to-earth. Meanwhile, Seraphin is… hypocritically courteous. Polite on the outside, but lowkey obnoxious and rude.」
『In short, she’s a vulgar woman, right? Does she have no redeeming qualities?』
「She’s smart.」
She’ll know when she meets her, I thought. We descended below ground and into the basement, reaching the wine ‘cellar’. ‘Seraphin Mariade’s house ♡’ was scrawled on the door.
『Okay, I get the idea. She’s not someone you should associate with!』
Having sensed something off about her, Lyla tightened her guard. Since the High Priest had moved in permanently, King Randolph had ordered the construction of another wine cellar unbeknownst to her. We entered and immediately spotted a woman with her face buried in a keg. Her leg was peeking out from under her habit.
「Oi, you alive, Seraphin?」
The woman lifted her head out of the keg clumsily. It was undoubtedly Seraphin, though she looked much the worse for wear.
「Ah, Roland-san… so you came to see me～」
「It’s been a while. I have a favor to ask of you.」
「What happened to your arm?」
「It’s gone. The area is now better ventilated.」
「Ufufu～ your jokes are as -hic- as wonderful as always…」
『There’s a dangerous aroma coming from her…!』, warned the ‘Shadow’, tugging at my sleeve. 『You have to put some distance between the two of you…』
「You didn’t respond to my letter, and I thought something happened to you…」, continued the drunkard.
「Nothing happened to me. You asked a question and I answered accordingly. Were you expecting anything else?」
「Well, I was expecting a letter saying that you were coming to claim me instead of Almeria-san!」
「That’s a shame.」
Empty bottles were strewn all over the floor. There were too many kegs with their lids off to be counted even with both hands.
「The alcohol here is much better than I had expected… and I can’t leave now…」
「Sounds like an attitude problem.」
Seraphin belched through tears and in between hiccups. Almeria had already warned me when I inquired of her state…
『Nothing good will come out of talking to a wine cellar dweller. How about we wait for her to come out on her own?』
I wanted to, but I couldn’t say so.
「I need your help, Seraphin.」
「So you finally noticed my female charm, Roland-san…」
「This is purely work-related.」
「Work, is it? Ehh…」
Picking up a glass lying next to her, she filled it with wine from the keg and turned around to drink. Her eyes rolling around lazily, her body started gently swaying left and right.
『I can see why she has no suitors…』, muttered Lyla.
「Huh? That voice… coming from that puppet thing created with the Demon King’s magic…」
Sharp. Lyla darted behind me to evade Seraphin’s drunken gaze.
「Ignore that.」
「I simply couldn’t believe that you would die without leaving so much as a corpse behind. I heard from Almeria-san much later that you were alive and kicking… then that letter asking about the collar came. Oh yeah, it’s all coming together…」
「And what will you do with that realisation?」
「As long as Roland-san is around, there will be world peace.」
She smiled.
「You’re the reason why our isolated party was able to join forces with various armies. You’re well versed in the art of the deal, and that ability is what I need now」, I said.
「Ehehe.」
While I wasn’t a completely hopeless negotiator either, I found considerable difficulty in making the other party accept my offer unconditionally.
「Are you asking for my hand in marriage?」
「No.」
「Simply because I’m ten years older than Almeria-san and Elvi-san? I knew it –!? And I’m almost three times Rina-san’s age…」
「That’s not what I meant at all.」
She broke down in tears.
『She’s nothing but undesirable! Not just loose, but also a burden…!?』
I tried another few times, but only ended up going around in circles. Seraphin was fixated on the idea of marriage when I asked for her help, and bemoaned her years when I rejected her. She also took glances at me, checking me out. What a calculative woman, I thought.
「Looks like I have no choice.」
It was simply impossible to work with a drunk Seraphin. I instructed Lyla’s ‘Shadow’ to go to another storeroom and roll a large keg filled with water to where I was.
『What are you going to do?』
「Watch」, I said. 「‘Real Nightmare’.」
『Ah, the spell I taught you a long time ago.』
「Look, Seraphin. Alcohol. In a recent miraculous breakthrough, they discovered wine that won’t make you feel sick no matter how much you drink. What a time to be alive.」
「Really? Thank you, Roland-san. I see that even an unmarried drunkard like me is still worthy in your eyes!」
She clasped her hands together and looked at me meekly.
「What’s important is not your appearance or your age, but rather what’s inside.」
「Exactly…! You get it, Roland-san!」
There’s nothing but alcohol sloshing around inside, I thought. Please, for the love of god, do something about it.
「It’s a miracle indeed… I like the smell…」
She sniffed the keg for a little longer, then instead of removing the lid, smashed it open with her fist.
「Haiyaaa!」
『T-that’s one way of doing it…』
「I brought it here for you, Seraphin. Finish it, then tell me what you think.」
「Alright!」
She began chugging the barrel’s contents, forgetting that we were there. We went upstairs and asked to borrow a spare room in the castle.
「Hopefully she’ll be more sober once some of that water circulates around her body.」
『When she realised it was me… was that a trap?』
「…」
『I appeared in front of humans a few times during the war, but I don’t think I’ve ever revealed my voice to them.』
I tutted before I realised it.
「That woman…」
『I see why you hold her strength in such high regard.』
I wondered if she had been suspecting me all this time. When she passed me the collar, she had commented that it was ‘fit for a Demon King’. I remembered that clearly. Perhaps I had let the cat out of the bag by asking her about it…
Ta’uro had also heard the rumours of the Demon King’s revival.
『It’s rare of you to get outwitted』, chuckled Lyla. 『Quite the spectacle.』
Translator: Denryuu; Editor: Ryunakama
I headed for the castle the following day, hoping to find Seraphin there. I had been planning to say hi to King Randolph, but couldn’t find him in his private quarters. Almeria was, as usual, at the orphanage.
『So she’s living in the wine cellar…?』
「It’s more of a storeroom used for wine than a proper cellar. But yes — I believe she was granted a lifetime’s supply of alcohol for being part of the Heroes’ Party.」
『There has to be a limit, isn’t there?』
I thought so too. Among all of us — Almeria, Rina, Elvi, Seraphin and myself — I was usually assumed to be a cut above the rest. Our ace, however, was in fact Seraphin.
『What kind of person is she?』
King Randolph’s servants, who knew me as their master’s friend, did a curt bow as we walked past before continuing on their way.
「She… has the least desirable personality. Almeria behaves like a reckless bull, Rina’s pure-hearted and innocent and Elvi’s extremely down-to-earth. Meanwhile, Seraphin is… hypocritically courteous. Polite on the outside, but lowkey obnoxious and rude.」
『In short, she’s a vulgar woman, right? Does she have no redeeming qualities?』
「She’s smart.」
She’ll know when she meets her, I thought. We descended below ground and into the basement, reaching the wine ‘cellar’. ‘Seraphin Mariade’s house ♡’ was scrawled on the door.
『Okay, I get the idea. She’s not someone you should associate with!』
Having sensed something off about her, Lyla tightened her guard. Since the High Priest had moved in permanently, King Randolph had ordered the construction of another wine cellar unbeknownst to her. We entered and immediately spotted a woman with her face buried in a keg. Her leg was peeking out from under her habit.
「Oi, you alive, Seraphin?」
The woman lifted her head out of the keg clumsily. It was undoubtedly Seraphin, though she looked much the worse for wear.
「Ah, Roland-san… so you came to see me～」
「It’s been a while. I have a favor to ask of you.」
「What happened to your arm?」
「It’s gone. The area is now better ventilated.」
「Ufufu～ your jokes are as -hic- as wonderful as always…」
『There’s a dangerous aroma coming from her…!』, warned the ‘Shadow’, tugging at my sleeve. 『You have to put some distance between the two of you…』
「You didn’t respond to my letter, and I thought something happened to you…」, continued the drunkard.
「Nothing happened to me. You asked a question and I answered accordingly. Were you expecting anything else?」
「Well, I was expecting a letter saying that you were coming to claim me instead of Almeria-san!」
「That’s a shame.」
Empty bottles were strewn all over the floor. There were too many kegs with their lids off to be counted even with both hands.
「The alcohol here is much better than I had expected… and I can’t leave now…」
「Sounds like an attitude problem.」
Seraphin belched through tears and in between hiccups. Almeria had already warned me when I inquired of her state…
『Nothing good will come out of talking to a wine cellar dweller. How about we wait for her to come out on her own?』
I wanted to, but I couldn’t say so.
「I need your help, Seraphin.」
「So you finally noticed my female charm, Roland-san…」
「This is purely work-related.」
「Work, is it? Ehh…」
Picking up a glass lying next to her, she filled it with wine from the keg and turned around to drink. Her eyes rolling around lazily, her body started gently swaying left and right.
『I can see why she has no suitors…』, muttered Lyla.
「Huh? That voice… coming from that puppet thing created with the Demon King’s magic…」
Sharp. Lyla darted behind me to evade Seraphin’s drunken gaze.
「Ignore that.」
「I simply couldn’t believe that you would die without leaving so much as a corpse behind. I heard from Almeria-san much later that you were alive and kicking… then that letter asking about the collar came. Oh yeah, it’s all coming together…」
「And what will you do with that realisation?」
「As long as Roland-san is around, there will be world peace.」
She smiled.
「You’re the reason why our isolated party was able to join forces with various armies. You’re well versed in the art of the deal, and that ability is what I need now」, I said.
「Ehehe.」
While I wasn’t a completely hopeless negotiator either, I found considerable difficulty in making the other party accept my offer unconditionally.
「Are you asking for my hand in marriage?」
「No.」
「Simply because I’m ten years older than Almeria-san and Elvi-san? I knew it –!? And I’m almost three times Rina-san’s age…」
「That’s not what I meant at all.」
She broke down in tears.
『She’s nothing but undesirable! Not just loose, but also a burden…!?』
I tried another few times, but only ended up going around in circles. Seraphin was fixated on the idea of marriage when I asked for her help, and bemoaned her years when I rejected her. She also took glances at me, checking me out. What a calculative woman, I thought.
「Looks like I have no choice.」
It was simply impossible to work with a drunk Seraphin. I instructed Lyla’s ‘Shadow’ to go to another storeroom and roll a large keg filled with water to where I was.
『What are you going to do?』
「Watch」, I said. 「‘Real Nightmare’.」
『Ah, the spell I taught you a long time ago.』
「Look, Seraphin. Alcohol. In a recent miraculous breakthrough, they discovered wine that won’t make you feel sick no matter how much you drink. What a time to be alive.」
「Really? Thank you, Roland-san. I see that even an unmarried drunkard like me is still worthy in your eyes!」
She clasped her hands together and looked at me meekly.
「What’s important is not your appearance or your age, but rather what’s inside.」
「Exactly…! You get it, Roland-san!」
There’s nothing but alcohol sloshing around inside, I thought. Please, for the love of god, do something about it.
「It’s a miracle indeed… I like the smell…」
She sniffed the keg for a little longer, then instead of removing the lid, smashed it open with her fist.
「Haiyaaa!」
『T-that’s one way of doing it…』
「I brought it here for you, Seraphin. Finish it, then tell me what you think.」
「Alright!」
She began chugging the barrel’s contents, forgetting that we were there. We went upstairs and asked to borrow a spare room in the castle.
「Hopefully she’ll be more sober once some of that water circulates around her body.」
『When she realised it was me… was that a trap?』
「…」
『I appeared in front of humans a few times during the war, but I don’t think I’ve ever revealed my voice to them.』
I tutted before I realised it.
「That woman…」
『I see why you hold her strength in such high regard.』
I wondered if she had been suspecting me all this time. When she passed me the collar, she had commented that it was ‘fit for a Demon King’. I remembered that clearly. Perhaps I had let the cat out of the bag by asking her about it…
Ta’uro had also heard the rumours of the Demon King’s revival.
『It’s rare of you to get outwitted』, chuckled Lyla. 『Quite the spectacle.』
