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Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 183

Published at 10th of May 2023 10:52:14 AM


Chapter 183

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“Hey, it’s time to get up.”

Along with the strange feeling on his face and Tsukuyo’s voice. Kawaki faintly opened his eyes but in the next moment. Kawaki’s face turned black, and the veins on his face jumped…

He saw Tsukuyo’s shoes stepping on his cheek.

“I’ll really kill you. If you dare to do this again next time.” Kawaki said with a fake smile.

“Ah, don’t worry. Next time, I will use a more convenient method to wake you up.” Tsukuyo moved her feet away and said casually. Then, she took out several kunai that emitted a cold light from her bosom and looked at Kawaki with a hypocritical look.

“What kind of convenient method is that? Do you really want me to get up, or do you want me never to open my eyes?” Kawaki said expressionlessly, “I don’t need that kind of thing at all! I just need a simple alarm clock!”

“Alarm clock? Is that so?” Tsukuyo glanced at Kawaki with disdain and then took two steps back, revealing the corpse of an alarm clock on the ground.

“What’s going on? Did you step on it?” Kawaki asked doubtfully.

Tsukuyo curled the corners of her lips. After giving him a ‘hehe’, she turned around and walked out of Kawaki’s room without looking back.

[PS: Kawaki has a passive skill that can always accurately destroy the alarm clock that just rang in his sleep. ]

[PS: Including today’s one, there are already a hundred of them. ]



On the dining table.

“What is this?” Kawaki looked at the white rice and eggs in front of him and was stunned for a full ten seconds. Then, he looked at Hinowa, who was beside him, “Is this a new punishment?” 

(TL notes: Tamago Kake Gohan(egg on rice) – is a popular Japanese breakfast food consisting of cooked Japanese rice topped or mixed with raw egg and soy sauce.)

“Isn’t it good to eat like this once in a while?” Hinowa said with a smile.

“Why is it rice with raw eggs?! I can’t stand the fishy smell of raw eggs! This is simply a dark cuisine!” Kawaki said with a speechless face.

Then, Kawaki watched Tsukuyo skillfully crack the egg and put it into the rice, then poured soy sauce and began to stir it. Looking at the rice grains stained with egg fluid, Kawaki felt a little nauseous.

“What are you talking about? This is the most traditional cuisine of Japanese people,” Hinowa explained with a smile.

“It should be traditional dark cuisine, right?” Kawaki retorted and then sighed softly, “Forget it, I’ll just eat some bread today. Thank you for your hospitality.”

After saying that, Kawaki directly got up and returned to his room.

“It seems that Kawaki-san doesn’t like Tamago Kake Gohan.” Hinowa murmured, “But he is really like a child. If he doesn’t like something, he will say he doesn’t like it. I like this kind of free and easy character.”

Tsukuyo did not say a word from beginning to end. She only glanced at Kawaki’s back when he left.



“Really, why did you eat that kind of thing in the morning?” Kawaki sat in front of the computer and muttered to himself with a displeased face, “I can’t even eat bread when I see that kind of thing! By the way, why is there such a dish like rice with raw egg? Is it because they hadn’t mastered how to use fire when they created this dish?”

“Forget it; let’s wait until noon.” As he spoke, Kawaki turned on the computer. His eyes were full of energy, “There is still the most important adventure waiting for me!”

However, just as he finished speaking,

Kawaki suddenly felt his phone vibrate in his bosom.

Kawaki took out his phone and stared at it, “So it’s a message from Kagura-chan.”

[Today, I got a new egg cracker-aru! I’m so happy! Attachment: jpg]

“I almost forgot. Kagura-chan also likes rice mixed with raw eggs.” Kawaki murmured. Then he opened the attached picture. However, when he looked at it, he was stunned. It was not an egg cracker device at all! It’s the head of a girl with green hair!!

In an instant, Kawaki quickly composed a message and sent it out: [Throw it away! Quickly! ]

Then, Kawaki got up directly. He did not care about the game and rushed out of the door instantly. However, when he just ran out of the door and bumped into Tsukuyo, who was in the corridor.

“Why are you in such a hurry?” Tsukuyo said with a look of disgust.

“Contact the best lawyer!” Kawaki said with a serious face and then rushed out again.

“What the hell are you talking about? That idiot…”



At the same time, Yorozuya.

At this time, Gintoki was sleeping soundly in his room. But suddenly, Gintoki seemed to hear some kind of voice that seemed to have a sense of incongruity. It seemed to be a BGM he was familiar with.

Gintoki tried his best to open his eyes. The first thing he saw was Kagura, who was holding a microphone and wearing sunglasses.

“Murmur, Murmur, Murmur~ Murmur, Murmur, Murmur~ Murmur, Murmur, Murmur~”

“What are you doing?! You bastard!” Gintoki sat up and pinched Kagura’s mouth.

“Good morning. Did you cut your hair?” Kagura held the microphone and deliberately lowered her voice.

PS: Kagura cosplay is a Spoof of Cozy Tomita who is an impersonator for Tamori, who is the host of “To ni mo kimyo na monogatari” – Tales of the Unusual.

“Cut your sister! What annoying things are you doing when other people are sleeping!” Gintoki cursed, his veins popping out.



It was Yorozuya’s breakfast time.

“Seriously, no wonder I had nightmares~” Gintoki complained as he sat on the sofa. Then, he put a raw egg into the bowl with rice.

“Itadakimasu!” Kagura, who was sitting opposite Gintoki, clapped her hands and said. Then, she looked at Gintoki, who was sitting opposite her, “Nom, nom! What kind of dream is that?”

“Just cut off a human head or something,” Gintoki said casually. At the same time, he poured some soy sauce into his bowl and began to stir, “Forget it, let’s not talk about it anymore. When you dream and wake up, you can’t tell anyone else. If you say it, you will end up being laughed at.”

“Is it the head from the garbage dump-aru?” Kagura asked casually.

“Eh? How do you know?” Gintoki put down the bowl in his hand and looked at Kagura with a puzzled expression.

“You said something in your dream-aru,” Kagura played with the egg in her hand and casually replied, “You’re already so old; why do you still have that kind of dream that only children would have?”

“Don’t tell Shinpachi. I’ll give you three hundred yen.” Gintoki replied, “But then again, I don’t remember anything before I slept. What exactly did I do last night?”

“Go to the garbage dump and pick up the Jump,” Kagura replied. At the same time, she knocked the egg on a hard object on the table a few times, “I waited for a while, but I still didn’t see you come back. I went to take a look and found that you were sleeping in the garbage dump-aru.”

Looking at the familiar hard object, Gintoki wiped his eyes several times and then pointed to the hard object on the table that had just been knocked by an egg. He said, “Kagura-chan, what is that?”

“This,” Kagura instantly picked up the hard object, or a girl’s head, and introduced it with a happy face, “An egg cracker device-aru! I found it yesterday!”

“No, no, no, no!” Gintoki instantly stood up and retorted loudly with a black face, “That was not an egg cracker device at all! This is the head from yesterday! Didn’t I say that it was a dream? Why did it appear here again? You idiot!”

“It’s not a head; it’s an egg cracker device-aru,” Kagura said with a serious face.

“What were you talking about kid!” Gintoki spat and scolded loudly, “What the hell is an egg cracker device? There is no such thing at all!”

After hearing this, Kagura put the head back on the table, then picked up an egg again and put it in front of her. She explained with a serious face, “Things like eggs always make people want to use their heads to break them, but this is very troublesome…”

As she spoke, Kagura looked at the human head at the side, and her tone changed, “But! If there is this…”

Looking at Kagura, who had used the head to crack the eggs again, Gintoki felt bad, “No! Absolutely not! Put it back! Put it back to its original place!”

“Don’t want-aru! This is my egg cracker device! I won’t give it to anyone!” Kagura retorted, “And I have already sent a message to Mommy-aru! Mommy has agreed!”

As she spoke, Kagura directly picked up her phone and showed Kouka replied: [I didn’t expect there to be such a convenient thing~]

“Your family is not normal!” Gintoki wailed, “Throw it out quickly! This is not something that should appear in our house!”

“Men are all the same,” Kagura said disdainfully, holding her hands in her bosom, “The words that Gin-chan and little uncle said were basically the same! However, what Mommy said before, the words of men are things that can not be believed.”

“You’re not talking about the same thing at all!” Gintoki was mad.

However, just as he finished complaining, Gintoki suddenly heard the sound of footsteps again, “What’s going on? Isn’t it the police? Kagura, what exactly did you do?”

The next second, Yorozuya’s door was kicked open, accompanied by Kawaki’s furious voice, “Gintoki! I put my most adorable niece in your house. Is this how you educate her?”

As he spoke, Kawaki instantly rushed in and kicked Gintoki over. He then scolded, “At least teach her common sense! How did you instill the common sense of cracking eggs with human heads!”

“I don’t know!” Gintoki said loudly as he got up, “Who knows where she learned that kind of common sense? I don’t know anything at all!”

“Kagura-chan, it doesn’t matter.” Kawaki turned to Kagura and said, “I have already asked Tsukki to contact the best lawyer. When the police asked, all the responsibility will be pushed onto this naturally wavy hair!”

“What the hell are you talking about!” Gintoki retorted, “I didn’t do anything at all! Responsibility? What responsibility? Is it the responsibility to water your head?!”

“What about the head?” Kawaki asked doubtfully, “It should be destroyed at a time like this!”

“That makes sense.” Gintoki supported his chin and nodded.




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