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Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 273

Published at 10th of May 2023 10:50:02 AM


Chapter 273

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About ten minutes later, the noise in the Snack Otose gradually calmed down. At least, the screams of Gintoki and Shinpachi were no longer as loud as they were at the beginning, only faint moans.

At this point, Kawaki’s face instantly changed into a fresh smile, and then he opened the door.

Gintoki and Shinpachi were lying on the ground with bloody noses and swollen faces. Not only were their clothes tattered, but their bodies were also tattered. There was no good place on their bodies. Of course, the entire Snack Otose had become a ruin.

Seeing Kawaki open the door and walk in, Shinpachi’s tears covered his entire face as he whispered, “Kawaki… san… save… me… Miss Tama… she seems to have gone berserk…”

“That’s really an incredible situation,” Kawaki said with a smile.

“The only one who can stop her is you, Kawaki-san… Please…” Shinpachi murmured, but just as he finished speaking, Shinpachi saw Tama walk up to Kawaki, lowering her head slightly and saying, “Kawaki-sama, the mission has been completed. The injuries caused by Tama require at least one month, half an hour, and thirty-two seconds of lying on the bed.”

“Well done, Tama.” Kawaki smiled and praised, “Next, just call an ambulance. Of course, you can also not call; just let the two of them go back upstairs to fend for themselves. “

“Understood.”

“Wait a minute!” The half-dead Gintoki on the ground yelled at Kawaki, “Are you joking? Did you instruct Tama to do this?! I’ll kill you!”

“Tama, I don’t really like the kind of time that is divided into parts. Please find a way to turn the half hour and a few seconds into whole numbers for me.” Kawaki said with a smile.

“But this way, it doesn’t meet the one-month Kawaki-sama requested,” Tama replied.

“Ah, no problem. If one month doesn’t work, let this silver-haired naturally wavy hair lie for three months. Let him lie down for a year if it hasn’t turned into a whole number again. If it still doesn’t work, it can be a lifetime. A lifetime is also a whole number~ Don’t you think so?” Kawaki glanced at Gintoki, who was still cursing on the ground and said.

“Understood.” After saying that, Tama turned around and walked toward Gintoki and Shinpachi again.

“Wait… wait…” Looking at Tama, who was getting closer and closer step by step, Gintoki was sweating profusely, “Listen to me! Tama! Don’t listen to the words of that kind of man! That kind of idiot is not worth it for you to do that!”

Hearing this, two veins popped out on Kawaki’s face, but he still said with a smile on his face, “Tama, let him lie in bed for the rest of his life.”

“Understood.”

Then, Kawaki turned around and left again, closing the door of Snack Otose.

Listening to the screams coming from inside the store, Kawaki’s expression softened a little.

“Sure enough, if I do this, my mood will be much better~.”

Kawaki suddenly thought of something as he spoke, and then he opened the door again. He took a stack of money from his bosom and directly threw it on the store counter.

“Tama, the money for breaking public property is here. Remember to tell her when the old woman comes back.”

After saying that, Kawaki closed the door again, turned around, and left without looking back…

It was evening. Otose, who had something to go out, brought Catherine back to the store while talking and laughing. But when Otose opened the door, she couldn’t laugh anymore.

Because in front of her was the entire Snack Otose, which had been destroyed, two human-shaped objects were lying on the floor, and Tama holding a broom to clean up the debris.

“What on earth happened to my store? A terrorist bombing?” Otose muttered with a face full of black lines.

“Otose… Help…” A human-shaped object on the ground made a weak sound…



The next day, Yoshiwara.

“Little uncle, why hasn’t Gin-chan and the others come to apologize to me-aru?” Kagura asked in front of Kawaki, who was lying on the floor, flipping through the Jump magazine in boredom.

“Maybe they were involved in some terrorist bombing.” Kawaki replied casually, “Maybe he’s lying on the bed with half his body paralyzed.”

“Maybe he still can’t bring himself to meet me right now,” Kagura analyzed with her arms crossed, “Maybe he’s even on his way to buy vinegar kelp right now!”

“The possibility of that is zero,” Kawaki replied without raising his head, “The two of them are currently in the hospital for treatment. Let alone buying you a vinegar kelp, the two of them can’t turn over…”

“Really-aru?!” Kagura exclaimed in shock, “Are they really involved in a terrorist bombing-aru?!”

With that, Kagura once again cupped her hands and nodded. She then said with a sigh, “Sure enough, without me, they wouldn’t even be able to complete a mission of that level.”

Kawaki, whose face was full of black lines, raised his head and said expressionlessly, “Speaking of which, shouldn’t you be more worried when you hear about the two of them in such a miserable state?”

“No need-aru!” Kagura looked up proudly, “They were in the wrong first. Why should I care about them? I won’t!”

“Well, do as you please,” Kawaki lowered his head again and turned over the Jump magazine page in his hand, “Aren’t you bored staying here? Even though it’s raining, staying indoors and watching TV all the time will be boring, right?”

“You’re right.” Kagura nodded in agreement.

“Then why don’t we take a stroll outside?” Kawaki continued to look at the Jump magazine in his hand and casually said, “It’s better than staying in the house and getting moldy all the time.”

“That’s right. Even if it’s raining, you should do some exercise-aru!” As she spoke, Kagura stood up and extended her hand toward Kawaki.

“In the shoes at the door,” Kawaki replied casually. However, Kawaki suddenly thought of something and raised his head to remind her, “Don’t forget to bring an umbrella.”

“I’m not as stupid as Little Uncle.” Kagura snorted disdainfully. Then she picked up her umbrella, turned around, and ran toward the door.

After arriving at the door, Kagura pinched her nose and took out an envelope with a pungent smell from Kawaki’s shoes.

“Be careful outside. Remember to send a message if you can’t come back for dinner.” Kawaki’s voice came again.

“I know-aru.” With that, Kagura put on her shoes and left without looking back.



On the street, the rain kept falling.

“Where should I go in this weather-aru?” Kagura muttered to herself as she held the umbrella. Then, Kagura suddenly thought of something. However, she quickly shook her head and said, “No, I absolutely don’t want-aru! It was clearly Gin-chan and the others who hurt me first. Why should I go to see them? No! Absolutely not!”

As she said that, Kagura nodded to herself, “Yes! That’s it! Mommy taught me-aru! Girls must never admit their mistakes first! No matter if it’s the girl’s fault or not, they can’t admit their mistakes first! Once they admit their mistakes first, those men will get worse from then on! It will fuel their arrogance-aru!”

Thinking of this, Kagura’s expression became serious, as if she had made up her mind. Then, she looked at the envelope she took out from Kawaki’s shoes and muttered, “Today, I will give my stomach a good reward! I want to eat barbecue-aru! I want to eat three people’s share!”

After saying that, Kagura strode toward the barbecue shop.

However, when Kagura arrived at the entrance of the barbecue shop, Kagura began to hesitate again.

“But… Mommy also said,” Kagura muttered to herself, “Sometimes, men can’t let go of their self-esteem. Girls can give men a step down at this time.”

“No! No! Absolutely not!” Kagura shook her head hard and then stepped forward to push open the glass door of the barbecue shop.

However, when Kagura’s hand was about to touch the door handle, she suddenly stopped, “As a girl who is so sensible, magnanimous, and cute that I can’t describe it in words, it’s okay to care about them occasionally at this time… I’m so distressed-aru…”

Just like that, Kagura stood at the entrance of the barbecue shop and paced back and forth. Half an hour passed, but Kagura still could not make a choice…



Noon, in front of the flower shop not far from the hospital.

Looking at the flower shop in front of her, Kagura finally chose to push the door open and walk in.

‘This is the only time!’ Kagura thought in her mind, ‘After all, the two of them are so miserable now. The casual care of such a cute girl will definitely be able to make the two of them feel moved and cry! Yes, yes! I am Yorozuya’s angel-like character!’

“Welcome,” The shop clerk greeted her with a smile on her face, “Little girl, are you going to buy flowers? What type do you need? Are you going to the hospital to visit your elders?”

“It’s not a little girl; it’s angel-aru!” Kagura corrected, “I’m like an angel to them!”

“I got it,” the clerk then asked with a smile, “Then, little angel, what kind of flowers do you need?”

“Anything is fine-aru,” Kagura waved her hand nonchalantly, “Even if you pick wildflowers from the road, it’s fine. They should be grateful since I’m kind enough to visit the two of them.”

“Alright, alright, I got it. How about this?” The clerk pointed to the beautiful flower basket and said, “This was ordered by a customer yesterday, but it’s past the pick-up time now, so I can sell it to you at a lower price.”

“It’s so beautiful.” Kagura opened her eyes wide and couldn’t help but sigh. But then, she noticed that she had lost her composure and hurriedly waved her hand, “No, no, no! There’s no need for such a beautiful flower basket-aru! Just pick the most common ones for them! “




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