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Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 276

Published at 10th of May 2023 10:49:56 AM


Chapter 276

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Yoshiwara.

“At least get out and go for a walk! You good-for-nothing otaku! Your “Otaku Smell” is beginning to float in the entire Yoshiwara, bastard!!”

Looking at Kawaki, who was beginning to emit an unknown smell, Tsukuyo could not bear it anymore and kicked Kawaki out of the window. Then, she threw Kawaki’s umbrella, which was beside the window, and slammed the window.



“It hurts, it hurts, it hurts…” Kawaki rubbed his head and slowly got up from the ground. He pouted and complained in a low voice, “What are you doing? You started going crazy early in the morning, did your menopause come early? Smelly woman!”

As soon as he finished speaking, two Kunai greeted Kawaki’s head…



In the streets of Edo.

Kawaki complained in a low voice as he walked with an umbrella. He did not notice that the pedestrians around him were pinching their noses as if they were avoiding a plague. Several pedestrians even vomited because they could not stand the smell coming from Kawaki’s body.

“Damn it, that woman. I only stayed in my room for less than a month and had some smell on my body. Why did you react so much? And what the hell is that “Otaku Smell”? I never heard of it at all. Smelly woman.”

As he spoke, Kawaki suddenly realized something and stopped. He stood where he was with his chin propped up and muttered, “No, that’s not right. Speaking of which, did I really stink? She’s not talking nonsense, is she? Although staying in the room during this rainy season is indeed easy to grow mold…”

Then, to verify whether he was like what Tsukuyo had said, Kawaki raised his arm and sniffed his clothes with his nose. However, in just a second, Kawaki turned around and directly vomited while leaning against the wall…

“?(´?`? ?)…” Kawaki wiped the saliva from his mouth and muttered with blackface, “So smelly… Is this legendary… otaku smell?”

“Don’t smell it! That’s otaku smell!” A mother with a child stood behind Kawaki, protecting her child from him. She crouched down and covered her child’s mouth and nose. Her face was full of seriousness, “It’s contagious! You will become an incurable otaku if you smell it!”

“There’s no such thing at all!” Kawaki turned around and shouted, “It’s not contagious at all! Why do you say that I’m like a biochemical virus?!”

The woman turned her head and glanced at Kawaki. She wanted to say something, but before she could open her mouth, she quickly covered her mouth, turned around, and vomited…

“Sorry, Tamaru.” The woman looked at her son apologetically, “Today, Mom might not be able to cook for you. Mom has been infected. If I don’t play pachinko today, it will definitely be hopeless. Mom will give you two thousand yen. Can you go to the convenience store to buy lunch?”

“What kind of specific detoxification method is that?! It was clearly you who wanted to play, right?!” Kawaki complained frantically, “It was clearly you who was too lazy to cook for your own son! And why did your son look at me with that resentful look?! Why did it seem like it was my fault?!”

“Mother!” Tamaru— the son looked at his mother, who was resisting to vomit, with tears in his eyes, and then looked at Kawaki with resentment again, “It was all your fault! It was all your fault that mother became like this!”

“So annoying, you stinking brat! It was clearly your mother who wanted to play pachinko! Are you an idiot?! Is it because you’re an idiot that you can’t see it? !” Kawaki shouted with veins popping out.

“I’m sorry, Tamaru…” The woman took out two thousand yen from her pocket and gently placed it in her son’s hand, “Mom… Mom can’t take it anymore…”

“Mom!!” Tamaru cried bitterly toward the sky and shouted.

Kawaki’s face was full of black lines, and the corners of his eyes were twitching as he looked at this farce that was like a death parting. The veins on his forehead were throbbing…



“Really, what “Otaku Smell”? I have never seen such a mother who deceives her son because she wants to play pachinko. Society is really sick…” As Kawaki walked, he muttered unhappily, “I was already in a terrible mood early in the morning. Really…”

“Where are we going to eat?” Tamaru followed behind Kawaki and asked.

“Whatever, just eat whatever you want, but before that, it’s better to take a bath first…” Kawaki subconsciously nodded and replied. However, just as he finished speaking, Kawaki suddenly reacted. He stopped and turned his head to look at the little guy behind him expressionlessly, “Why did you follow me? Didn’t I already say that your mother just wanted to play pachinko? It has nothing to do with me!”

Hearing this, Tamaru’s eyes instantly became moist, and the corners of his mouth curled as if he was about to cry at any time.

“This move doesn’t work on me.” Kawaki said expressionlessly, “I don’t have that kind of overflowing sympathy.”

Just as Kawaki finished speaking, Tamaru immediately started crying. The crying instantly attracted the surrounding passers-by.

“Wu… It’s all because of you… Wu… Mother left me alone,” Tamaru cried, “It’s all your fault, but you still have this attitude… Wu…”

“If it was touching the porcelain, your acting skills are too bad.” Kawaki looked up and snorted disdainfully, “This level of touching the porcelain was quite low.”

Hearing this, Tamaru cried even louder.

“Did you hear that? That child’s mother seems to have been abandoned by that man…”

“He looks good, but he can do that kind of thing…”

“Moreover, this man actually wants to abandon his own child. How disappointing…”

“That’s right, what a terrible stinky man…”

“Speaking of smelly, don’t you think there is a terrible smell? It’s the smell coming from that stinky man…”

“Ah, I also smell it. It smells so bad! He really is a disgusting man…”



Listening to the whispers and the gazes of the surrounding pedestrians, which he could feel even without looking, the veins on Kawaki’s already completely dark face were throbbing.

“Shut up!” Kawaki raised his head and shouted, “It’s not what you say, you bastards! I don’t know this brat at all!”

“This kind of man just has an appearance, but his heart is rotten to the extreme…”

“You’re right; the rotten smell in his heart was already spreading out from his body…”

“Yes…”



Listening to the whispers of the crowd, Kawaki’s face turned even darker…



In the bathhouse.

“That’s great~,” Kawaki leaned against the pool with his eyes closed and couldn’t help but moan, “Sure enough, occasionally taking a bath is a very comfortable thing~.”

“Yes~,” Tamaru imitated Kawaki and also closed his eyes to lean against the pool, “It’s really comfortable~.”

Hearing this voice, Kawaki’s expression instantly froze, and then he turned to look at Tamaru and reminded, “Hey, smelly brat, only this once. After taking a bath, I will take you to have a meal, and you will go home obediently.”

“Yes~,” Tamaru replied.

At this time, Kawaki finally sized up Tamaru carefully. He had short black hair, big eyes, a small round face, and looked to be six or seven years old.

“It looks harmless. Little brat is indeed little brat.” Kawaki snorted, then picked up the iced cola he had just bought from the vending machine and took a sip. He once again let out a comfortable moan, “Ah~ As expected, iced cola is very compatible with a bath. However, some people like to drink milk after bathing.”

“Yes, it really fits~,” Tamaru copied Kawaki and took a sip of the coke.

“Little brat, you understand it very well, hahaha…”



After soaking in the pool and changing into dry-cleaned clothes, Kawaki led Tamaru to a restaurant.

“Order as you please,” Kawaki crossed his arms and waved his hand impatiently, “But this is the only time.”

“Oh!” Tamaru answered and flipped through the menu with a face full of excitement.

“He really is a kid. He can be so excited at this level.” Kawaki muttered in disdain. Then, he glanced at Tamaru in front of him again, ‘His flax-colored clothes looked a little old but were very clean and had a few patches on them. It seemed that he was not a child of a rich family.’

“Obviously, in this kind of family situation, that mother still has the heart to play pachinko, really…” Kawaki curled the corners of his mouth and muttered again.

“Nani? Pachinko? What pachinko? Did you win this child by playing pachinko?” Gintoki, who was sitting next to Kawaki at some point in time, asked. Then, he raised his hand and called out to the waitress not far away, “Two cups of chocolate parfait, please!”

“No, I just met a woman who left her son behind to play pachinko,” Kawaki subconsciously replied. However, Kawaki immediately reacted. He expressionlessly looked at Gintoki, who was beside him, as well as a young girl and a human-shape glasses, “Hey, why are you here?”

“On the way, I accidentally saw a human trafficker that kidnapped children, so I followed them.” Gintoki cupped his hands and nodded.

“Do I look like someone who would do that?” Kawaki complained expressionlessly. Then, he looked at Shinpachi, who was constantly ordering and shouted expressionlessly, “Also… I didn’t say I would treat you to a meal! Can you stop ordering on your own?”

“What does it matter? In any case, it is fine to invite one. Even if you invite four, it is still fine.” Gintoki said casually while digging his nose.

“It’s completely different!” Kawaki retorted.

“Don’t be so stingy. Next time, I will lend you my photo book collection. They are all top quality.” Gintoki put his arm around Kawaki’s shoulder and laughed mischievously, “I promise you will like them.”




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