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Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 293

Published at 15th of April 2024 05:59:16 AM


Chapter 293

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When he heard this, Kawaki once again turned his face away and whispered, “He~”

That’s enough! Why can’t you trust me? Do you only think about that kind of thing?!” Shinpachi argued loudly, with veins popping out of his eyes. Then, his expression gradually calmed down, “That was a letter that was delivered to me after drifting across the wide ocean. There must be some kind of fate.”

As he spoke, a trace of distress appeared on Shinpachi’s face, “However, if sister knew, she would definitely think that I’m ridiculous and would definitely be angry.”

“Shinpachi, I don’t mean anything else.” Kawaki waved his hand impatiently, “I just have some vegetables in my teeth. No, it’s just that my teeth were a bit uncomfortable. You should be the one thinking the wrong way…”

“Who will believe it?!”

“Also, don’t always think of your sister as pedantic,” Kawaki continued nonchalantly, “After telling this kind of thing, your sister might be able to understand it.”

Gintoki cupped his hands and nodded in agreement.

“No, she definitely won’t understand!” Shinpachi replied without hesitation.

However, just as Shinpachi finished speaking, the door was suddenly open. At the same time, Otae’s voice rang out, “Shin-chan, I have brought tea and snacks over…”

“Sis…” Shinpachi hurriedly shouted.

The expressionless Otae placed a wooden tray into the door, “Eat some if you can. Here.”

Looking at the large piece of sweet potato in the middle of the tray and the whole bottle of lubricant next to the sweet potato, Shinpachi was confused.

At this time, Otae lowered her head and said with an expressionless face, “If… if you are worried that’s not enough…”

As she said this, Otae brought a bowl of sticky, boiled lubricant(noodles?), “You can add this one; please make do with it.”

At this time, several black lines had already appeared in the corner of Shinpachi’s eyes. At the same time, they were already beginning to twitch.

“Shin-chan,” Otae turned her face away. No one could see her expression. She held the sliding door with both hands and muttered, “That… no matter what kind of child Shin-chan has become, you are still my… younger brother!”

After saying that, Otae closed the sliding door forcefully and left without looking back, not giving Shinpachi a chance to explain at all.

“Look, doesn’t she understand it very well?” Gintoki was still looking at the photo in his hand and asked casually.

“Yeah, what a good sister. She can actually face her brother’s psychological growth in such a normal way.” Kawaki nodded.

“Wait a minute!” Only then did Shinpachi react. She could not help but shout, “Speaking of which, what method did you two use to make her understand?! What did you two say to other people’s sisters?! Why did she take out a lubricant when serving tea?! Why did she especially open a hole in the sweet potato like a konjac?!”

As he spoke, Shinpachi covered his face and looked at the ceiling. “She’s completely misunderstood! She hasn’t looked at me once since just now! What should I do now? If this continues, the situation will get worse, right?! How are you two going to resolve the misunderstanding?!!”

“No, I didn’t say anything. It was all Gintoki who told your sister everything.” Kawaki waved his hand and argued with an indifferent expression.

“Gin-san!!!”

“Don’t make such a big fuss. Calm down, Shinpachi,” Gintoki consoled indifferently. At the same time, he picked up the sweet potato on the plate and took a big bite. As he ate, he said vaguely, “Isn’t it nice to have lubricant and a pen pal?”

“Not good at all!” Shinpachi retorted loudly, “Compared to the exposure of the pen buddy, this situation is even worse, right?”

“What does it matter?” Kawaki shrugged indifferently, “There will be such a day sooner or later, right? It doesn’t matter if it’s earlier.”

“It does matter!” Shinpachi retorted.

While Shinpachi and Kawaki were arguing, Gintoki stood up and walked to the small desk by the window. He sat down at the desk and picked up the letter that Shinpachi had just written. He muttered in a low voice, “Then, what did you write in your reply letter? Let me take a look at it.”

“No, don’t look!” Only then did Shinpachi notice. He hurriedly stepped forward to stop him, but it was already too late. Gintoki had already read through all the contents of the letter and read it out.

“Nice to meet you. I’ve already read your letter. It’s really incredible. It drifted through such a vast sea to my hands…” After reading for a while, Gintoki suddenly lost interest in continuing. He turned his head to look at Shinpachi and sighed. He then said with dissatisfaction, “What are you writing? It’s long and boring. It’s so ordinary.”

“There… there is nothing wrong with this! I can’t possibly write something interesting like today, right?” Shinpachi retorted while trying to snatch the letter from Gintoki. However, Gintoki did not give him a chance.

“Let me see.” Kawaki suddenly stood up and walked over. He took the letter from Gintoki and looked at it. However, after looking at it for a while, Kawaki could not help but burst out laughing. Then, he looked at Shinpachi, who was still trying to snatch the letter from him, “Isn’t your writing too ordinary? No, this should be right. Because you are ordinary Shinpachi that you be able to write such an ordinary letter.”

“What do you mean by ‘Ordinary Shinpachi’ and ‘Ordinary letter ‘? Why did you add such adjectives to my name?” Shinpachi retorted. At the same time, he also took the opportunity to snatch the letter from Kawaki’s hand.

“Don’t you understand?” Kawaki was puzzled and then looked at Gintoki beside him, “Hey, Gintoki, this child doesn’t understand, so can you act like the reaction of a girl who receives this kind of letter?”

“There’s no other way, that’s the only way to go,” Gintoki nodded, then snatched the letter from Shinpachi’s hand again. Then, he put on an act of a shy woman. He pinched his throat and said, “Ah~ This boy is really boring~ I can see from the letter that he is a virgin in heat who wears glasses. Ah~ So disgusting~ I absolutely must not reply to him~

After saying that, Gintoki returned to his normal state and sighed. He looked at Shinpachi helplessly and said, “Look. Basically, that’s the case.”

“The ones just now are clearly me in your eyes!” Shinpachi said anxiously, “How could you see so many things with just a letter?!”

“No, no, you have to know that there are some things that can be seen at a glance through words,” Gintoki shook his head and sighed, “Girls are not like boys. Girls are very meticulous. They can find many key information from your words, such as your character, your clothes, your astrological signs, etc… Basically, they will see it clearly after reading it.”

“How could that be…” Shinpachi revealed a look of disbelief.

“So, it’s better not to look down on words,” Kawaki kindly reminded, “A girl’s sixth sense is really something.”

“If you want to be friends with this child, it is best to be cautious and even more unconventional.” Gintoki continued, “The other party is playing with a novelty and interesting thing like a drifting bottle. There is also the other party’s concise letter. People who like this kind of novelty mostly hate trouble. I’m afraid they won’t read more than three sentences of your letter.”

After listening, Shinpachi sat down and muttered with a disappointed face, “It’s true that my letter is long and pointless…”

“Since you don’t know much about the other party’s situation, you can only write about your own matters.” Gintoki suggested, “If you want to introduce yourself, three lines are enough. There is also the photo. You have to send your photo to the other party like the other party.”

“Speaking of which…” Shinpachi looked up at Gintoki and asked with some uncertainty, “But there are only three lines for self-introduction. Can it work?”

Just as Shinpachi finished asking, Kawaki on the other side had already put down his pen and picked up the [reply letter] he had just written and handed it to Shinpachi.

“Take it and use it. Don’t be polite.” Kawaki crossed his arms and chuckled.

Looking at the three-line letter in his hand, Shinpachi was silent. After a while, Shinpachi finally threw the letter in his hand on the table and shouted, “What is this? It’s too simple!”

There were really only three lines written by Kawaki: Shimura Shinpachi, Virgin, Sixteen Years Old.

“But I think it’s not bad,” Gintoki murmured. “It’s exactly like you, no matter who reads this letter, they will think of you.”

“That “Virgin” is superfluous no matter how you look at it! How can someone emphasize that he is a “Virgin” in a reply letter to a girl?” Shinpachi retorted loudly.

“That makes sense,” Gintoki nodded, “The word “Virgin” is indeed a bit inappropriate. It feels a bit old-fashioned.”

“That’s right, no matter what the word “Virgin” should not appear in this kind of place!” Shinpachi nodded and replied strongly.

“Then how about changing it to Cherry Boy?” Kawaki suggested, “Would it be better if it was changed to Cherry Boy? It feels more fashionable in English.”

“Indeed, if Cherry Boy replaced it, it would feel much better.” Gintoki nodded in agreement.

“There is no difference at all!” Shinpachi really wanted to flip the table, “Can’t the two of you suggest something more useful?! Why must you emphasize this kind of thing in the letter?! It doesn’t make any sense!”




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