Chapter 191: Twilight Determination
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Chapter 191: Twilight Determination
After we finished resting, we all headed back into town, bringing one of the Dragon’s teeth with us to verify we’d completed the job. The tooth was a little too big for us to fit it in any equipment packs we had, so instead I just had to carry it in my hands on the way back.
I decided against telling Ainash and Erani about the Tribute thing Index had told me about just yet, since we were still surrounded by our companion party, and I didn’t want to accidentally cause a dramatic reaction in front of everyone else with such big news, even if I used Ainash for silent communication with Erani. I’d just tell them next time we were alone; we wouldn’t be able to do the Tribute until then, anyway.
As we walked up to the town walls, I saw, at the entrance, the guards' eyes widen upon spotting us. They muttered to one another until we arrived.
“Hey,” I said, “just heading back in after doing a job. You need to see our degree plates?”
“You were the ones that fought the Dragon?” one of them asked.
I frowned. “How’d you know there was a Dragon?”
He chuckled. “How could we not know? It flew all the way up into the sky and then fell right back down! Could hear the landing from here.”
“Yeah,” Sylvie said before he could respond, “that was totally us! It was so awesome! I did, like, most of the work. If you look at it a certain way. Kind of.”
“It was horrendous,” Entismo muttered.
“Well, anyway,” I said, “could you let us in?”
We eventually got through the checkpoint and into the town proper, heading straight for the guild to turn in our trophy. We certainly got a lot of looks with the cargo we carried, but I wasn’t worried the attention would be too unwanted. We were the only ones who’d accepted the job, so if someone else tried to steal the Young Dragon’s tooth from us, they’d have a lot of trouble actually getting any money out of it.
Besides, out on the streets, most people didn’t really care enough to pay much attention to us.
Once we got to the guild, however, it was a different story.
The moment we opened the doors and people saw what we had, the entire lobby exploded into conversation.
“Is that the Dragon’s tooth?”
“Holy flames, it died?”
“It was really an adventuring party that killed it?”
“How in the flames did they drop it out of the sky?”
“Was there even a job out for that?”
It felt like millions of questions floated through the lobby, everyone muttering to each other or directly asking us. Sylvie made everything worse, of course, answering peoples’ questions with obvious over-exaggerations of what’d actually happened.
But above it all, there was one particular comment that caught my attention.
“Isn’t that the guy who ran away from the Goblin forest?” a woman asked. I recognized her, as well as the table she was sitting with, as one of the groups that’d initially seen Erani and I coming back from the forest having not completed the job, and mocked us for it, not knowing the real reason we’d been forced to retreat.
One of the men at the table leaned over to her. “I think it is. Him and that shadowy woman.”
Another chimed in, “Wasn’t that Dragon fight we saw happening inside of the Goblin forest?”
“So that was why they ran, then? They got chased off by a Dragon? Not the Goblins?”
“And then they went back and...killed it?”
The woman stood abruptly and approached me as I worked my way through the tables.
“Hey,” she said. “Uh, no hard feelings, right? We didn’t know what was going on before, and...”
I looked at her for a moment, then sighed. Eventually, I just said, “Don’t talk shit next time.”
And then I kept walking.
Once the trophy was turned in and we claimed our reward, we headed back to Boy’s place to count up the money and split it among ourselves without having to worry about the other adventurers in the lobby shouting at us.
And with it being late night already and everybody too exhausted to walk all the way through town to their own places to sleep, Boy ended up offering for us to spend the night there. He apparently had the bedrooms to spare.
Sylvie, of course, instantly broke out some alcohol and poured everyone a drink, though Erani and I were sure to be modest with our consumption. Plus, Erani’s Mana was running low anyway, so she needed to go somewhere before Distortion Strike ran out. Her solution was to just say she was tired, and then head to a bedroom and pretend to sleep while she waited. Then, once she had some Mana back, she could just say she couldn’t fall asleep and come back.
“So when’s our next job gonna be?” Sylvie said after Erani retired to a bedroom. “We’re working together for more stuff, right? Man, I’m so pumped!”
We were all sitting in Boy’s living room in various chairs and couches, around a central low-standing table where our plates sat. Boy, upon getting slightly tipsy, had wandered off and just made an entire dessert for us all—a frozen treat I hadn't had before that was made using cream and sugar. It was fantastic, but so rich I could barely handle having a couple spoonfuls before I could barely handle anymore, and sat my half-eaten bowl down on the table. I felt bad leaving something that tasted so good out like that, though, and if I was being honest with myself, would probably finish it within the hour.
“If you don’t wanna talk about it, that’s fine.”
“No, I suppose I should.” He paused for a moment, seeming to want to look anywhere but at me. With a white face and beads of sweat starting to form on his forehead, he honestly looked more like I’d caught him committing murder than just doing something kind of weird. He took a deep breath, and continued. “You see, I...I am quite fond of a, er, companion of mine.”
“Yeah, Aliss, right?”
He blinked, staring at me like I’d just stabbed him through the ribs. “W-what?”
“I mean, it’s kind of obvious. You have a crush on her, right?”
“My goodness.” He took a handkerchief from his pocket and used it to dab his forehead. “You must be quite experienced in courtship to have recognized it so easily. I-I commend your skill.”
“Uh...sure. But what’s that have to do with looking up words in a dictionary?”
He grabbed the thick book and held it with both hands, flipping it side over side absent-mindedly. “Well, you see...I was never naturally skilled at interacting with my fellow noblemen. I have just a horrendous memory, and trying to keep track of the names and the faces, the social rules, who you bow to and who you nod your head to and who you never make eye contact with...It was all too much for me.“
“I can imagine,” I said.
“However, I do believe the element I struggled most with was the speech. My parents and siblings, everyone I spoke to, they all had such a way with words! An eloquence that seemed to force the sun’s rays onto them whenever they spoke, as though it were words from an angel itself. An eloquence I could not aspire to mimic. I spent day and night practicing with my parents, but no matter how much I tried, my words simply did not flow in that way.”
“Wait, so that’s what you’re doing? You’re trying to find good words to use when you talk?”
“I will never reach the level of wit that my contemporaries seem to effortlessly wield, but perhaps my studying will be enough to allow me to stand upon the same pedestal they do, even if they stand taller.”
“But why? Aren’t you away from all of that noble stuff? Isn’t that, like, the whole point of leaving your hometown to become an adventurer?”
“No, you see, I must become better not to impress a noble, but...Tell me, Annor, what do you see when you look at me?”
“What?”
“What are my qualities?”
“Um, I don’t know. I don’t know you that well. But I guess if I had to answer, I’d say my first impression of you would be that you’re cautious, careful...”
“Yes, so I am a coward,” he said.
“No, I didn’t say that, I said—”
“But it is what I am.”
I pursed my lips. “Alright, well you also do speak well, even if you think you need practice, and...”
“And that is it, I am afraid. That is all the good you can say about me. I can imagine you have other ways to describe me, of course, such as weak, selfish, lazy, ignorant, unwilling to do what it takes. But if you wish to speak well of me, that is all you are able to say. I have a wide vocabulary. I do believe that is the only good thing about me, unfortunately. I would like, very much, to be able to put my noble lineage behind me, but I am afraid it is all I am worth. I certainly cannot add more value to myself, so to abandon the one thing that someone might find worthy in me...I cannot do that. Even if I am unskilled, I must hone my wordcraft, so that I may be able to pull a radiant beam to myself whenever I speak.
“I mean...” I sighed. “If you don’t like an aspect of yourself, I don’t think that’s some immutable flaw you could never change, right?”
He shook his head. “I do not have time to spend...”
He frowned, and reached down to grab the dictionary, opening it and flipping through the pages, before stopping somewhere and quickly reading the entry.
“Ah, yes,” he said, setting the book down and looking back up at me. “I do not have time to spend dillydallying. If I do not make myself at least slightly desirable to Aliss soon, then...”
“So she rejected your advance?”
“Hm? No, no! I have done my best to keep my feelings a secret. If she knows how I feel before I can become a better person, I fear she will never be able to see me as a romantic prospect. It is a delicate dance, you see, for one must first be worthy of admiration and affection before revealing their heart's desires. And so, I study this vast lexicon in hopes of enriching my speech, that I may charm her with the beauty of my words, just as others do effortlessly.”
“Well, if she doesn’t even know you like her, how do you know she wouldn’t already accept if you asked her on a date?”
“Oh, I could never! I should be completely confident before asking. A-and I certainly do not feel confident yet.”
“Well, man, I’m not sure I know what to tell you. I don’t think you need to be completely confident at all. I mean, I’ve asked plenty of people out while entirely sure I’d get a no. I’ve also asked people out knowing that, if we did start dating, it’d only be a matter of time before it ended. But you don’t have to wait until you’re perfectly confident in your abilities, or that the person you’re talking to is the one you’ll marry. I mean, romance is a skill, right? And you can’t learn a skill by just sitting around all day and studying it. Learning all the words will no more make you a poet than learning all the monster names will make you a gold-plate adventurer. You need practice. Ask her out. If she says yes, great. If she says no, that’s some damn good practice. And, I’m gonna be honest, there’s probably very little you could do to change her mind if she isn’t into you. It’s better to know for sure whether there’s a chance between you two now, rather than forcing yourself to wonder whether or not all this effort is worth it.”
He looked down for a moment. “...Thank you for the words, Annor. I will consider what you have said.”
I nodded. “No problem, man.”
Eventually, I got back to my room and laid down, closing my eyes. But I wasn’t going to sleep yet.
Okay, Index, I thought, I’m gonna go ahead and ignore your advice here. Even if it’ll be reset when I give my Level away to the Tribute, I wanna see what these Spells do.
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Chapter 191: Twilight Determination
After we finished resting, we all headed back into town, bringing one of the Dragon’s teeth with us to verify we’d completed the job. The tooth was a little too big for us to fit it in any equipment packs we had, so instead I just had to carry it in my hands on the way back.
I decided against telling Ainash and Erani about the Tribute thing Index had told me about just yet, since we were still surrounded by our companion party, and I didn’t want to accidentally cause a dramatic reaction in front of everyone else with such big news, even if I used Ainash for silent communication with Erani. I’d just tell them next time we were alone; we wouldn’t be able to do the Tribute until then, anyway.
As we walked up to the town walls, I saw, at the entrance, the guards' eyes widen upon spotting us. They muttered to one another until we arrived.
“Hey,” I said, “just heading back in after doing a job. You need to see our degree plates?”
“You were the ones that fought the Dragon?” one of them asked.
I frowned. “How’d you know there was a Dragon?”
He chuckled. “How could we not know? It flew all the way up into the sky and then fell right back down! Could hear the landing from here.”
“Yeah,” Sylvie said before he could respond, “that was totally us! It was so awesome! I did, like, most of the work. If you look at it a certain way. Kind of.”
“It was horrendous,” Entismo muttered.
“Well, anyway,” I said, “could you let us in?”
We eventually got through the checkpoint and into the town proper, heading straight for the guild to turn in our trophy. We certainly got a lot of looks with the cargo we carried, but I wasn’t worried the attention would be too unwanted. We were the only ones who’d accepted the job, so if someone else tried to steal the Young Dragon’s tooth from us, they’d have a lot of trouble actually getting any money out of it.
Besides, out on the streets, most people didn’t really care enough to pay much attention to us.
Once we got to the guild, however, it was a different story.
The moment we opened the doors and people saw what we had, the entire lobby exploded into conversation.
“Is that the Dragon’s tooth?”
“Holy flames, it died?”
“It was really an adventuring party that killed it?”
“How in the flames did they drop it out of the sky?”
“Was there even a job out for that?”
It felt like millions of questions floated through the lobby, everyone muttering to each other or directly asking us. Sylvie made everything worse, of course, answering peoples’ questions with obvious over-exaggerations of what’d actually happened.
But above it all, there was one particular comment that caught my attention.
“Isn’t that the guy who ran away from the Goblin forest?” a woman asked. I recognized her, as well as the table she was sitting with, as one of the groups that’d initially seen Erani and I coming back from the forest having not completed the job, and mocked us for it, not knowing the real reason we’d been forced to retreat.
One of the men at the table leaned over to her. “I think it is. Him and that shadowy woman.”
Another chimed in, “Wasn’t that Dragon fight we saw happening inside of the Goblin forest?”
“So that was why they ran, then? They got chased off by a Dragon? Not the Goblins?”
“And then they went back and...killed it?”
The woman stood abruptly and approached me as I worked my way through the tables.
“Hey,” she said. “Uh, no hard feelings, right? We didn’t know what was going on before, and...”
I looked at her for a moment, then sighed. Eventually, I just said, “Don’t talk shit next time.”
And then I kept walking.
Once the trophy was turned in and we claimed our reward, we headed back to Boy’s place to count up the money and split it among ourselves without having to worry about the other adventurers in the lobby shouting at us.
And with it being late night already and everybody too exhausted to walk all the way through town to their own places to sleep, Boy ended up offering for us to spend the night there. He apparently had the bedrooms to spare.
Sylvie, of course, instantly broke out some alcohol and poured everyone a drink, though Erani and I were sure to be modest with our consumption. Plus, Erani’s Mana was running low anyway, so she needed to go somewhere before Distortion Strike ran out. Her solution was to just say she was tired, and then head to a bedroom and pretend to sleep while she waited. Then, once she had some Mana back, she could just say she couldn’t fall asleep and come back.
“So when’s our next job gonna be?” Sylvie said after Erani retired to a bedroom. “We’re working together for more stuff, right? Man, I’m so pumped!”
We were all sitting in Boy’s living room in various chairs and couches, around a central low-standing table where our plates sat. Boy, upon getting slightly tipsy, had wandered off and just made an entire dessert for us all—a frozen treat I hadn't had before that was made using cream and sugar. It was fantastic, but so rich I could barely handle having a couple spoonfuls before I could barely handle anymore, and sat my half-eaten bowl down on the table. I felt bad leaving something that tasted so good out like that, though, and if I was being honest with myself, would probably finish it within the hour.
“If you don’t wanna talk about it, that’s fine.”
“No, I suppose I should.” He paused for a moment, seeming to want to look anywhere but at me. With a white face and beads of sweat starting to form on his forehead, he honestly looked more like I’d caught him committing murder than just doing something kind of weird. He took a deep breath, and continued. “You see, I...I am quite fond of a, er, companion of mine.”
“Yeah, Aliss, right?”
He blinked, staring at me like I’d just stabbed him through the ribs. “W-what?”
“I mean, it’s kind of obvious. You have a crush on her, right?”
“My goodness.” He took a handkerchief from his pocket and used it to dab his forehead. “You must be quite experienced in courtship to have recognized it so easily. I-I commend your skill.”
“Uh...sure. But what’s that have to do with looking up words in a dictionary?”
He grabbed the thick book and held it with both hands, flipping it side over side absent-mindedly. “Well, you see...I was never naturally skilled at interacting with my fellow noblemen. I have just a horrendous memory, and trying to keep track of the names and the faces, the social rules, who you bow to and who you nod your head to and who you never make eye contact with...It was all too much for me.“
“I can imagine,” I said.
“However, I do believe the element I struggled most with was the speech. My parents and siblings, everyone I spoke to, they all had such a way with words! An eloquence that seemed to force the sun’s rays onto them whenever they spoke, as though it were words from an angel itself. An eloquence I could not aspire to mimic. I spent day and night practicing with my parents, but no matter how much I tried, my words simply did not flow in that way.”
“Wait, so that’s what you’re doing? You’re trying to find good words to use when you talk?”
“I will never reach the level of wit that my contemporaries seem to effortlessly wield, but perhaps my studying will be enough to allow me to stand upon the same pedestal they do, even if they stand taller.”
“But why? Aren’t you away from all of that noble stuff? Isn’t that, like, the whole point of leaving your hometown to become an adventurer?”
“No, you see, I must become better not to impress a noble, but...Tell me, Annor, what do you see when you look at me?”
“What?”
“What are my qualities?”
“Um, I don’t know. I don’t know you that well. But I guess if I had to answer, I’d say my first impression of you would be that you’re cautious, careful...”
“Yes, so I am a coward,” he said.
“No, I didn’t say that, I said—”
“But it is what I am.”
I pursed my lips. “Alright, well you also do speak well, even if you think you need practice, and...”
“And that is it, I am afraid. That is all the good you can say about me. I can imagine you have other ways to describe me, of course, such as weak, selfish, lazy, ignorant, unwilling to do what it takes. But if you wish to speak well of me, that is all you are able to say. I have a wide vocabulary. I do believe that is the only good thing about me, unfortunately. I would like, very much, to be able to put my noble lineage behind me, but I am afraid it is all I am worth. I certainly cannot add more value to myself, so to abandon the one thing that someone might find worthy in me...I cannot do that. Even if I am unskilled, I must hone my wordcraft, so that I may be able to pull a radiant beam to myself whenever I speak.
“I mean...” I sighed. “If you don’t like an aspect of yourself, I don’t think that’s some immutable flaw you could never change, right?”
He shook his head. “I do not have time to spend...”
He frowned, and reached down to grab the dictionary, opening it and flipping through the pages, before stopping somewhere and quickly reading the entry.
“Ah, yes,” he said, setting the book down and looking back up at me. “I do not have time to spend dillydallying. If I do not make myself at least slightly desirable to Aliss soon, then...”
“So she rejected your advance?”
“Hm? No, no! I have done my best to keep my feelings a secret. If she knows how I feel before I can become a better person, I fear she will never be able to see me as a romantic prospect. It is a delicate dance, you see, for one must first be worthy of admiration and affection before revealing their heart's desires. And so, I study this vast lexicon in hopes of enriching my speech, that I may charm her with the beauty of my words, just as others do effortlessly.”
“Well, if she doesn’t even know you like her, how do you know she wouldn’t already accept if you asked her on a date?”
“Oh, I could never! I should be completely confident before asking. A-and I certainly do not feel confident yet.”
“Well, man, I’m not sure I know what to tell you. I don’t think you need to be completely confident at all. I mean, I’ve asked plenty of people out while entirely sure I’d get a no. I’ve also asked people out knowing that, if we did start dating, it’d only be a matter of time before it ended. But you don’t have to wait until you’re perfectly confident in your abilities, or that the person you’re talking to is the one you’ll marry. I mean, romance is a skill, right? And you can’t learn a skill by just sitting around all day and studying it. Learning all the words will no more make you a poet than learning all the monster names will make you a gold-plate adventurer. You need practice. Ask her out. If she says yes, great. If she says no, that’s some damn good practice. And, I’m gonna be honest, there’s probably very little you could do to change her mind if she isn’t into you. It’s better to know for sure whether there’s a chance between you two now, rather than forcing yourself to wonder whether or not all this effort is worth it.”
He looked down for a moment. “...Thank you for the words, Annor. I will consider what you have said.”
I nodded. “No problem, man.”
Eventually, I got back to my room and laid down, closing my eyes. But I wasn’t going to sleep yet.
Okay, Index, I thought, I’m gonna go ahead and ignore your advice here. Even if it’ll be reset when I give my Level away to the Tribute, I wanna see what these Spells do.
Chapter 191: Twilight DeterminationAfter we finished resting, we all headed back into town, bringing one of the Dragon's teeth with us to verify we'd completed the job. The tooth was a little too big for us to fit it in any equipment packs we had, so instead I just had to carry it in my hands on the way back.I decided against telling Ainash and Erani about the Tribute thing Index had told me about just yet, since we were still surrounded by our companion party, and I didn't want to accidentally cause a dramatic reaction in front of everyone else with such big news, even if I used Ainash for silent communication with Erani. I'd just tell them next time we were alone; we wouldn't be able to do the Tribute until then, anyway.As we walked up to the town walls, I saw, at the entrance, the guards' eyes widen upon spotting us. They muttered to one another until we arrived.Hey, I said, just heading back in after doing a job. You need to see our degree plates?You were the ones that fought the Dragon? one of them asked.I frowned. How'd you know there was a Dragon?He chuckled. How could we not know? It flew all the way up into the sky and then fell right back down! Could hear the landing from here.Yeah, Sylvie said before he could respond, that was totally us! It was so awesome! I did, like, most of the work. If you look at it a certain way. Kind of.It was horrendous, Entismo muttered.Well, anyway, I said, could you let us in?We eventually got through the checkpoint and into the town proper, heading straight for the guild to turn in our trophy. We certainly got a lot of looks with the cargo we carried, but I wasn't worried the attention would be too unwanted. We were the only ones who'd accepted the job, so if someone else tried to steal the Young Dragon's tooth from us, they'd have a lot of trouble actually getting any money out of it.Besides, out on the streets, most people didn't really care enough to pay much attention to us.Once we got to the guild, however, it was a different story.The moment we opened the doors and people saw what we had, the entire lobby exploded into conversation.Is that the Dragon's tooth?Holy flames, it died?It was really an adventuring party that killed it?How in the flames did they drop it out of the sky?Was there even a job out for that?It felt like millions of questions floated through the lobby, everyone muttering to each other or directly asking us. Sylvie made everything worse, of course, answering peoples' questions with obvious over-exaggerations of what'd actually happened.But above it all, there was one particular comment that caught my attention.Isn't that the guy who ran away from the Goblin forest? a woman asked. I recognized her, as well as the table she was sitting with, as one of the groups that'd initially seen Erani and I coming back from the forest having not completed the job, and mocked us for it, not knowing the real reason we'd been forced to retreat.One of the men at the table leaned over to her. I think it is. Him and that shadowy woman.Another chimed in, Wasn't that Dragon fight we saw happening inside of the Goblin forest?So that was why they ran, then? They got chased off by a Dragon? Not the Goblins?And then they went back and...killed it?The woman stood abruptly and approached me as I worked my way through the tables.Hey, she said. Uh, no hard feelings, right? We didn't know what was going on before, and...I looked at her for a moment, then sighed. Eventually, I just said, Don't talk shit next time.And then I kept walking.Once the trophy was turned in and we claimed our reward, we headed back to Boy's place to count up the money and split it among ourselves without having to worry about the other adventurers in the lobby shouting at us.And with it being late night already and everybody too exhausted to walk all the way through town to their own places to sleep, Boy ended up offering for us to spend the night there. He apparently had the bedrooms to spare.Sylvie, of course, instantly broke out some alcohol and poured everyone a drink, though Erani and I were sure to be modest with our consumption. Plus, Erani's Mana was running low anyway, so she needed to go somewhere before Distortion Strike ran out. Her solution was to just say she was tired, and then head to a bedroom and pretend to sleep while she waited. Then, once she had some Mana back, she could just say she couldn't fall asleep and come back.So when's our next job gonna be? Sylvie said after Erani retired to a bedroom. We're working together for more stuff, right? Man, I'm so pumped! We were all sitting in Boy's living room in various chairs and couches, around a central low-standing table where our plates sat. Boy, upon getting slightly tipsy, had wandered off and just made an entire dessert for us alla frozen treat I hadn't had before that was made using cream and sugar. It was fantastic, but so rich I could barely handle having a couple spoonfuls before I could barely handle anymore, and sat my half-eaten bowl down on the table. I felt bad leaving something that tasted so good out like that, though, and if I was being honest with myself, would probably finish it within the hour.If you don't wanna talk about it, that's fine.No, I suppose I should. He paused for a moment, seeming to want to look anywhere but at me. With a white face and beads of sweat starting to form on his forehead, he honestly looked more like I'd caught him committing murder than just doing something kind of weird. He took a deep breath, and continued. You see, I...I am quite fond of a, er, companion of mine.Yeah, Aliss, right?He blinked, staring at me like I'd just stabbed him through the ribs. W-what?I mean, it's kind of obvious. You have a crush on her, right?My goodness. He took a handkerchief from his pocket and used it to dab his forehead. You must be quite experienced in courtship to have recognized it so easily. I-I commend your skill.Uh...sure. But what's that have to do with looking up words in a dictionary?He grabbed the thick book and held it with both hands, flipping it side over side absent-mindedly. Well, you see...I was never naturally skilled at interacting with my fellow noblemen. I have just a horrendous memory, and trying to keep track of the names and the faces, the social rules, who you bow to and who you nod your head to and who you never make eye contact with...It was all too much for me.I can imagine, I said.However, I do believe the element I struggled most with was the speech. My parents and siblings, everyone I spoke to, they all had such a way with words! An eloquence that seemed to force the sun's rays onto them whenever they spoke, as though it were words from an angel itself. An eloquence I could not aspire to mimic. I spent day and night practicing with my parents, but no matter how much I tried, my words simply did not flow in that way.Wait, so that's what you're doing? You're trying to find good words to use when you talk?I will never reach the level of wit that my contemporaries seem to effortlessly wield, but perhaps my studying will be enough to allow me to stand upon the same pedestal they do, even if they stand taller.But why? Aren't you away from all of that noble stuff? Isn't that, like, the whole point of leaving your hometown to become an adventurer?No, you see, I must become better not to impress a noble, but...Tell me, Annor, what do you see when you look at me?What?What are my qualities?Um, I don't know. I don't know you that well. But I guess if I had to answer, I'd say my first impression of you would be that you're cautious, careful...Yes, so I am a coward, he said.No, I didn't say that, I saidBut it is what I am.I pursed my lips. Alright, well you also do speak well, even if you think you need practice, and...And that is it, I am afraid. That is all the good you can say about me. I can imagine you have other ways to describe me, of course, such as weak, selfish, lazy, ignorant, unwilling to do what it takes. But if you wish to speak well of me, that is all you are able to say. I have a wide vocabulary. I do believe that is the only good thing about me, unfortunately. I would like, very much, to be able to put my noble lineage behind me, but I am afraid it is all I am worth. I certainly cannot add more value to myself, so to abandon the one thing that someone might find worthy in me...I cannot do that. Even if I am unskilled, I must hone my wordcraft, so that I may be able to pull a radiant beam to myself whenever I speak.I mean... I sighed. If you don't like an aspect of yourself, I don't think that's some immutable flaw you could never change, right?He shook his head. I do not have time to spend...He frowned, and reached down to grab the dictionary, opening it and flipping through the pages, before stopping somewhere and quickly reading the entry.Ah, yes, he said, setting the book down and looking back up at me. I do not have time to spend dillydallying. If I do not make myself at least slightly desirable to Aliss soon, then...So she rejected your advance?Hm? No, no! I have done my best to keep my feelings a secret. If she knows how I feel before I can become a better person, I fear she will never be able to see me as a romantic prospect. It is a delicate dance, you see, for one must first be worthy of admiration and affection before revealing their heart's desires. And so, I study this vast lexicon in hopes of enriching my speech, that I may charm her with the beauty of my words, just as others do effortlessly.Well, if she doesn't even know you like her, how do you know she wouldn't already accept if you asked her on a date?Oh, I could never! I should be completely confident before asking. A-and I certainly do not feel confident yet.Well, man, I'm not sure I know what to tell you. I don't think you need to be completely confident at all. I mean, I've asked plenty of people out while entirely sure I'd get a no. I've also asked people out knowing that, if we did start dating, it'd only be a matter of time before it ended. But you don't have to wait until you're perfectly confident in your abilities, or that the person you're talking to is the one you'll marry. I mean, romance is a skill, right? And you can't learn a skill by just sitting around all day and studying it. Learning all the words will no more make you a poet than learning all the monster names will make you a gold-plate adventurer. You need practice. Ask her out. If she says yes, great. If she says no, that's some damn good practice. And, I'm gonna be honest, there's probably very little you could do to change her mind if she isn't into you. It's better to know for sure whether there's a chance between you two now, rather than forcing yourself to wonder whether or not all this effort is worth it.He looked down for a moment. ...Thank you for the words, Annor. I will consider what you have said.I nodded. No problem, man.Eventually, I got back to my room and laid down, closing my eyes. But I wasn't going to sleep yet.Okay, Index, I thought, I'm gonna go ahead and ignore your advice here. Even if it'll be reset when I give my Level away to the Tribute, I wanna see what these Spells do.
