Chapter 294
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Chapter 294
As the golden sun dips low and sets the sky alight with streaks of orange and red, our merchant ships are busy seeking safe harbour on sandy white beaches. Grand and inspiring as they are, the flat-bottomed coastal vessels still rely on human eyes for navigation. Not even a Martial Warriors night vision is enough to keep us from running afoul of rocks and reefs or drifting off-course into the deadly deep waters of the Azure Sea. While we could make better time sailing non-stop, its far too dangerous to risk the lives of thousands of sailors and soldiers and even though it ruins the romance of sailing beneath the stars, Im relieved were stopping each night. Not only am I in no rush to reach Nan Ping, I wasnt looking forward to sleeping inside a stuffy cargo hold beside my entire retinue. This also solves the problem of the overly-attached shelled dinosaur following me everywhere I go. Ancient and powerful giant turtle though she may be, Ping-Ping acts more like a clingy ex-girlfriend, insisting on being as close to me, or more likely Blobby, as circumstances permit. Im just glad shes happy sleeping outside the yurt, because if she insisted on being any closer, Id be sleeping beneath the open skies.
Sweet as she is, I dont want to find out what happens when Ping-Ping gets angry.
While Pran and Saluk set up my yurt and Ping-Ping buries herself in the sand beside it, I greet my caged feathery friends with a heavy heart. Seeing the white-bellied, brown-bodied, blue streaked birds hop about on their perches, I choke up at the thought of what Im about to do. Using dried fish to lure him over, I stroke Rocs chest through the bars for what might be the last time. You tubby little fiend, I whisper, trying not to cry. I think youll like it here. There's the sea and plains, plenty of variety for your diet. If youve forgotten how to hunt and get hungry, then you bring your flock and come find me okay? Ill be travelling south, so try to find which boat Im on. Ill probably be in the crows nest, but if you cant find me, then head south and follow the coast to Nan Ping. Therell be tons of people there, you cant miss it.
I dont know why Im giving directions to a bird, but I like to pretend Roc understands me as he gobbles down the treat. I dont know if setting them free is the right thing to do or if Im consigning them to a wretched death in the wilds, but I cant put this off any longer. Theyre stressed out from being cooped up all the time, plucking their feathers and fighting amongst themselves even on the rare occasions I let them out inside my yurt. Since I dont need their feathers anymore and weve travelled to a warmer climate, its time to let them spread their wings and fly.
Better to die free than live caged, right?
Giving Roc one last pat, I remove the padlock and unwrap the chains to their cage, dreading seeing them fly off into the sunset, but this must be done. As soon as the chains are gone, Roc lands on the gate and uses his beak to unlatch it, so smoothly his momentum is enough to swing it open. Without saying goodbye, the poofy bird flaps his wings and takes off with a flutter of motion, leading his flock out in the unending skies and soaring off into the-
...into a fallen sack of dried fish, carelessly dropped by a passing soldier.
After ripping the sack to shreds and devouring its contents, my feathery friends move to harass everyone in sight, laughing as they fearlessly approach soldier and sailor alike to check their packs and pockets for food or trinkets. Fearful of injuring the birds and drawing my anger, the poor souls suffer with minimal resistance as Roc and his flock flap unchecked along the beach side. Unsatisfied by the meagre offerings provided, they soon turn to assaulting anyone who lacks the means or intent to pay tribute. As I watch the cloud of laughing beaks and scratching talons nip and claw my friends and allies, Im beset by a sinking sensation in the pit of my stomach as I realize Ive made a huge mistake.
Oh dear Mother in Heaven, what horrors have I unleashed unto your world? I plea for mercy upon my soul, as this was done in ignorance and with only the best intentions.
After a half-hour spent failing to trick them back into the cage and a stern visit from my unamused Mentor, I settle the avian issue by placing their perch next to my yurt and feeding them another bag of dried fish. Inwardly cursing these devious and deplorable blackmailing birds as they settle in for a post-meal nap, I take comfort in knowing some farmer or hunter will shoot them out of the skies soon after I leave in the morning. Wherever Roc and his birdies came from, I imagine it must have been a wretched land of anarchy and ruin brought about by these voracious winged vermin.
As if to make up for being a pest, Roc taps his forehead against my hand, his signal for head scritches. Stupid as I am, his adorable antics bring a smile to my face and I pet him until he signals the end of touchy time with a softer-than-usual nip. Im not sure if he genuinely appreciates what Ive done or if hes exploiting my good nature, but either way, Im kinda glad he didnt just fly off into the distance.
I love all my pets. If I can, Ill help them all live long and happy lives.
Its a shame munching on Spiritual Plants does nothing for humans. At best, its trading Heavens bounty for little extra roughage in your diet. You might even suffer dire complications depending on the plant eaten. It hardly seems fair, but I suppose humanity is used to getting the short end of the stick and still coming out on top. Realistically, if I were an alien and knew nothing about humans aside from their physical appearance, I would hardly expect them to be the dominant species in a world with wolves, tigers, and bears, but here we are.
Woo, humanity. Fuck yea!
Praying my birds dont wake up and go on another rampage, I settle down for a hot dinner cooked by Charok and his adorable assistant Tali. Another reason we disembark every night, the ships don't have a kitchen, which sucks. Aside from the usual suspects joining us for dinner, Huu's half-wolf geezer and the Protectorate senior Guan Suo also make an appearance, though there's no sign of Huu himself. The old timers are like two taciturn peas in a pod, showing up for every meal and leaving without a word of praise or thanks. I dont mind the half-wolf geezer too much, hes with Huu which means hes one of us, but Guan Suo makes me uncomfortable. Not because hes an outsider or because I'm worried hell notice something strange about me feeding water to Ping-Ping, but for another, less practical reason.This chapter is updated by nov(e)(l)biin.com
Namely his big, floofy, red panda tail.
I dont like it. Milas floofy tail is adorable and it irks me to see one so similar on this long-browed, turtle-loving weirdo. Think about it: hes a grown-ass man who spends his days masquerading as a plebeian woodcutter on the off-chance someone wants to bother his turtle friend. Ping-Ping doesnt even acknowledge him, she doesnt seem to care about anything but eating and Blobby, and by extension, me. Considering Akanai all but begged me to be on my best behaviour around him, I can tell she respects him which means hes probably an incredible warrior, but I still cant bring myself to like him. My retinue shared their gear and yurts so the Protectorate could look presentable and sleep comfortably, but I havent heard a single peep of thanks. Hell, Guan Suo is still dressed in his stinky woodsman rags. I cant stand him, he smokes while we eat, spits where we walk, and expects everyone to cater to his needs while he hides all day and presumably brushes his silky white beard and eyebrows.
Hes disgusting and the sight of him fills me with loathing. Red pandas are supposed to be cute and lovable. Its a damn crime is what it is.
My irrational animosity with their leader aside, Im glad the Protectorate joined up. Shabbily dressed though they might be, theyre a fine addition to the retinue. About a third of them know how to Conceal themselves and hide in plain sight, a skill Im dying to learn but requires external Chi usage. The rest are skilled scouts, trackers, and huntsmen, which will be useful in Nan Ping if food ever becomes an issue. Even if theyre only here to protect their Guardian Turtle, so long as I stick close to Ping-Ping, then its almost the same as protecting me. If we include Lang Yi and the other seventy-nine former slaves from Yo Lings island, then my two hundred and eighty strong retinue has grown to a healthy four hundred and seventy odd soldiers.
Don't think about the odds. Positive Mental Attitude. Every little bit counts, right? Then again, I'm a little concerned by how everyone talks like our victory over the Defiled is all but inevitable, with no one mentioning what to do should the worst come to pass. Is it pure arrogance or fear and apprehension keeping people from speculating?
Using external help is no good, children must learn to deal with their own problems.
Trading incredulous stares with BoShui, we quietly leave the two old codgers as their discussion devolves into mud-slinging and name-calling. It's kinda cute seeing two old farts making friends. At least... I hope they're making friends.
While escorting BoShui back to his camp with a full complement of my guards, I ask, So... exactly how many siblings do you have? And how strong is the Han Patriarch? I mean... their suggestions weren't terrible, we could do the first to buy some time then work on the second. Whos the little scamp? I should figure that out and ask her for help. Can't be the turtle, Guan Suo would never be so rude to Ping-Ping.
Shrugging, BoShui answers, Two full-blooded siblings and seventeen half-siblings, but Im only comfortable murdering one or two of them without knowing which one is the true heir. The pitfalls of having a conscience I suppose. As for the Patriarch... Im not sure. Stronger than Uncle BoHai at least, or he wouldve killed my father for sending BoLao to the Confessor.
Hmm... nineteen is a little more than I expected, and despite having never seen his uncle in action, Im not confident we can kill someone stronger than the eight Spiritual Weapon-wielding Major General. Dude looks awesome in his spiked boots and gauntlets, like some medieval biker gangster or something. Besides, as Clan Patriarch and one of three shot-callers of the Society, I imagine BoShuis scumbag daddy is fairly well-protected. Ugh, this is so bothersome. Is every faction in the North so full of strife or is the Han Clan an outlier? If not then were really fucked when it comes time to fight...
This really begs the question: After millennia of discord and dissension, how did the Defiled overcome their enmity and band together to attack the Empire and why didnt we see it coming? There were no rumours or inklings of Defiled unification before their coordinated attack on the three Provinces, which means their alliance was less than a year in the making. How did their leader or leaders manage such a miracle? How are they communicating across such vast distances quickly enough to coordinate movements down to the minute? Do they have Defiled Radio or did they station one Defiled every kilometre and used Sending to create the longest game of broken telephone in history?
So many questions but Im hardly qualified to ask them, much less put together an answer.
Whatever. Putting what I just learned to use, I focus on the positives in life, chatting with my friend about training and martial skills. Even if I cant swing the outcome of the war, what I can do is put my best foot forward while doing everything I can not to start new feuds. Even better if I can make new friends, so its important I remain humble and pleasant throughout my entire stay in Nan Ping.
Peace and Tranquility is a state of mind, not two weapons I use to handle my problems. Balance in all things, not just martial skills and mindset, but in social interactions and stressful situations. I will become the embodiment of friendliness and harmony. No off-hand remarks, no funny looks, no accidental insults, just a pleasant, affable young man seeking like-minded individuals to make friends with.
Yea... this is going to work out great...
Ah, add that to the list: No sarcastic quips.
... And no eye-rolling.
Or smirking.
Or ogling.
Or sighing.
...
......
Ah fuck it. Were probably doomed.
Where my furbabies at? I need a cuddle.
Chapter Meme
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Chapter 294
As the golden sun dips low and sets the sky alight with streaks of orange and red, our merchant ships are busy seeking safe harbour on sandy white beaches. Grand and inspiring as they are, the flat-bottomed coastal vessels still rely on human eyes for navigation. Not even a Martial Warriors night vision is enough to keep us from running afoul of rocks and reefs or drifting off-course into the deadly deep waters of the Azure Sea. While we could make better time sailing non-stop, its far too dangerous to risk the lives of thousands of sailors and soldiers and even though it ruins the romance of sailing beneath the stars, Im relieved were stopping each night. Not only am I in no rush to reach Nan Ping, I wasnt looking forward to sleeping inside a stuffy cargo hold beside my entire retinue. This also solves the problem of the overly-attached shelled dinosaur following me everywhere I go. Ancient and powerful giant turtle though she may be, Ping-Ping acts more like a clingy ex-girlfriend, insisting on being as close to me, or more likely Blobby, as circumstances permit. Im just glad shes happy sleeping outside the yurt, because if she insisted on being any closer, Id be sleeping beneath the open skies.
Sweet as she is, I dont want to find out what happens when Ping-Ping gets angry.
While Pran and Saluk set up my yurt and Ping-Ping buries herself in the sand beside it, I greet my caged feathery friends with a heavy heart. Seeing the white-bellied, brown-bodied, blue streaked birds hop about on their perches, I choke up at the thought of what Im about to do. Using dried fish to lure him over, I stroke Rocs chest through the bars for what might be the last time. You tubby little fiend, I whisper, trying not to cry. I think youll like it here. There's the sea and plains, plenty of variety for your diet. If youve forgotten how to hunt and get hungry, then you bring your flock and come find me okay? Ill be travelling south, so try to find which boat Im on. Ill probably be in the crows nest, but if you cant find me, then head south and follow the coast to Nan Ping. Therell be tons of people there, you cant miss it.
I dont know why Im giving directions to a bird, but I like to pretend Roc understands me as he gobbles down the treat. I dont know if setting them free is the right thing to do or if Im consigning them to a wretched death in the wilds, but I cant put this off any longer. Theyre stressed out from being cooped up all the time, plucking their feathers and fighting amongst themselves even on the rare occasions I let them out inside my yurt. Since I dont need their feathers anymore and weve travelled to a warmer climate, its time to let them spread their wings and fly.
Better to die free than live caged, right?
Giving Roc one last pat, I remove the padlock and unwrap the chains to their cage, dreading seeing them fly off into the sunset, but this must be done. As soon as the chains are gone, Roc lands on the gate and uses his beak to unlatch it, so smoothly his momentum is enough to swing it open. Without saying goodbye, the poofy bird flaps his wings and takes off with a flutter of motion, leading his flock out in the unending skies and soaring off into the-
...into a fallen sack of dried fish, carelessly dropped by a passing soldier.
After ripping the sack to shreds and devouring its contents, my feathery friends move to harass everyone in sight, laughing as they fearlessly approach soldier and sailor alike to check their packs and pockets for food or trinkets. Fearful of injuring the birds and drawing my anger, the poor souls suffer with minimal resistance as Roc and his flock flap unchecked along the beach side. Unsatisfied by the meagre offerings provided, they soon turn to assaulting anyone who lacks the means or intent to pay tribute. As I watch the cloud of laughing beaks and scratching talons nip and claw my friends and allies, Im beset by a sinking sensation in the pit of my stomach as I realize Ive made a huge mistake.
Oh dear Mother in Heaven, what horrors have I unleashed unto your world? I plea for mercy upon my soul, as this was done in ignorance and with only the best intentions.
After a half-hour spent failing to trick them back into the cage and a stern visit from my unamused Mentor, I settle the avian issue by placing their perch next to my yurt and feeding them another bag of dried fish. Inwardly cursing these devious and deplorable blackmailing birds as they settle in for a post-meal nap, I take comfort in knowing some farmer or hunter will shoot them out of the skies soon after I leave in the morning. Wherever Roc and his birdies came from, I imagine it must have been a wretched land of anarchy and ruin brought about by these voracious winged vermin.
As if to make up for being a pest, Roc taps his forehead against my hand, his signal for head scritches. Stupid as I am, his adorable antics bring a smile to my face and I pet him until he signals the end of touchy time with a softer-than-usual nip. Im not sure if he genuinely appreciates what Ive done or if hes exploiting my good nature, but either way, Im kinda glad he didnt just fly off into the distance.
I love all my pets. If I can, Ill help them all live long and happy lives.
Its a shame munching on Spiritual Plants does nothing for humans. At best, its trading Heavens bounty for little extra roughage in your diet. You might even suffer dire complications depending on the plant eaten. It hardly seems fair, but I suppose humanity is used to getting the short end of the stick and still coming out on top. Realistically, if I were an alien and knew nothing about humans aside from their physical appearance, I would hardly expect them to be the dominant species in a world with wolves, tigers, and bears, but here we are.
Woo, humanity. Fuck yea!
Praying my birds dont wake up and go on another rampage, I settle down for a hot dinner cooked by Charok and his adorable assistant Tali. Another reason we disembark every night, the ships don't have a kitchen, which sucks. Aside from the usual suspects joining us for dinner, Huu's half-wolf geezer and the Protectorate senior Guan Suo also make an appearance, though there's no sign of Huu himself. The old timers are like two taciturn peas in a pod, showing up for every meal and leaving without a word of praise or thanks. I dont mind the half-wolf geezer too much, hes with Huu which means hes one of us, but Guan Suo makes me uncomfortable. Not because hes an outsider or because I'm worried hell notice something strange about me feeding water to Ping-Ping, but for another, less practical reason.This chapter is updated by nov(e)(l)biin.com
Namely his big, floofy, red panda tail.
I dont like it. Milas floofy tail is adorable and it irks me to see one so similar on this long-browed, turtle-loving weirdo. Think about it: hes a grown-ass man who spends his days masquerading as a plebeian woodcutter on the off-chance someone wants to bother his turtle friend. Ping-Ping doesnt even acknowledge him, she doesnt seem to care about anything but eating and Blobby, and by extension, me. Considering Akanai all but begged me to be on my best behaviour around him, I can tell she respects him which means hes probably an incredible warrior, but I still cant bring myself to like him. My retinue shared their gear and yurts so the Protectorate could look presentable and sleep comfortably, but I havent heard a single peep of thanks. Hell, Guan Suo is still dressed in his stinky woodsman rags. I cant stand him, he smokes while we eat, spits where we walk, and expects everyone to cater to his needs while he hides all day and presumably brushes his silky white beard and eyebrows.
Hes disgusting and the sight of him fills me with loathing. Red pandas are supposed to be cute and lovable. Its a damn crime is what it is.
My irrational animosity with their leader aside, Im glad the Protectorate joined up. Shabbily dressed though they might be, theyre a fine addition to the retinue. About a third of them know how to Conceal themselves and hide in plain sight, a skill Im dying to learn but requires external Chi usage. The rest are skilled scouts, trackers, and huntsmen, which will be useful in Nan Ping if food ever becomes an issue. Even if theyre only here to protect their Guardian Turtle, so long as I stick close to Ping-Ping, then its almost the same as protecting me. If we include Lang Yi and the other seventy-nine former slaves from Yo Lings island, then my two hundred and eighty strong retinue has grown to a healthy four hundred and seventy odd soldiers.
Don't think about the odds. Positive Mental Attitude. Every little bit counts, right? Then again, I'm a little concerned by how everyone talks like our victory over the Defiled is all but inevitable, with no one mentioning what to do should the worst come to pass. Is it pure arrogance or fear and apprehension keeping people from speculating?
Using external help is no good, children must learn to deal with their own problems.
Trading incredulous stares with BoShui, we quietly leave the two old codgers as their discussion devolves into mud-slinging and name-calling. It's kinda cute seeing two old farts making friends. At least... I hope they're making friends.
While escorting BoShui back to his camp with a full complement of my guards, I ask, So... exactly how many siblings do you have? And how strong is the Han Patriarch? I mean... their suggestions weren't terrible, we could do the first to buy some time then work on the second. Whos the little scamp? I should figure that out and ask her for help. Can't be the turtle, Guan Suo would never be so rude to Ping-Ping.
Shrugging, BoShui answers, Two full-blooded siblings and seventeen half-siblings, but Im only comfortable murdering one or two of them without knowing which one is the true heir. The pitfalls of having a conscience I suppose. As for the Patriarch... Im not sure. Stronger than Uncle BoHai at least, or he wouldve killed my father for sending BoLao to the Confessor.
Hmm... nineteen is a little more than I expected, and despite having never seen his uncle in action, Im not confident we can kill someone stronger than the eight Spiritual Weapon-wielding Major General. Dude looks awesome in his spiked boots and gauntlets, like some medieval biker gangster or something. Besides, as Clan Patriarch and one of three shot-callers of the Society, I imagine BoShuis scumbag daddy is fairly well-protected. Ugh, this is so bothersome. Is every faction in the North so full of strife or is the Han Clan an outlier? If not then were really fucked when it comes time to fight...
This really begs the question: After millennia of discord and dissension, how did the Defiled overcome their enmity and band together to attack the Empire and why didnt we see it coming? There were no rumours or inklings of Defiled unification before their coordinated attack on the three Provinces, which means their alliance was less than a year in the making. How did their leader or leaders manage such a miracle? How are they communicating across such vast distances quickly enough to coordinate movements down to the minute? Do they have Defiled Radio or did they station one Defiled every kilometre and used Sending to create the longest game of broken telephone in history?
So many questions but Im hardly qualified to ask them, much less put together an answer.
Whatever. Putting what I just learned to use, I focus on the positives in life, chatting with my friend about training and martial skills. Even if I cant swing the outcome of the war, what I can do is put my best foot forward while doing everything I can not to start new feuds. Even better if I can make new friends, so its important I remain humble and pleasant throughout my entire stay in Nan Ping.
Peace and Tranquility is a state of mind, not two weapons I use to handle my problems. Balance in all things, not just martial skills and mindset, but in social interactions and stressful situations. I will become the embodiment of friendliness and harmony. No off-hand remarks, no funny looks, no accidental insults, just a pleasant, affable young man seeking like-minded individuals to make friends with.
Yea... this is going to work out great...
Ah, add that to the list: No sarcastic quips.
... And no eye-rolling.
Or smirking.
Or ogling.
Or sighing.
...
......
Ah fuck it. Were probably doomed.
Where my furbabies at? I need a cuddle.
Chapter Meme
Chapter 294As the golden sun dips low and sets the sky alight with streaks of orange and red, our merchant ships are busy seeking safe harbour on sandy white beaches. Grand and inspiring as they are, the flat-bottomed coastal vessels still rely on human eyes for navigation. Not even a Martial Warriors night vision is enough to keep us from running afoul of rocks and reefs or drifting off-course into the deadly deep waters of the Azure Sea. While we could make better time sailing non-stop, its far too dangerous to risk the lives of thousands of sailors and soldiers and even though it ruins the romance of sailing beneath the stars, Im relieved were stopping each night. Not only am I in no rush to reach Nan Ping, I wasnt looking forward to sleeping inside a stuffy cargo hold beside my entire retinue. This also solves the problem of the overly-attached shelled dinosaur following me everywhere I go. Ancient and powerful giant turtle though she may be, Ping-Ping acts more like a clingy ex-girlfriend, insisting on being as close to me, or more likely Blobby, as circumstances permit. Im just glad shes happy sleeping outside the yurt, because if she insisted on being any closer, Id be sleeping beneath the open skies.Sweet as she is, I dont want to find out what happens when Ping-Ping gets angry.While Pran and Saluk set up my yurt and Ping-Ping buries herself in the sand beside it, I greet my caged feathery friends with a heavy heart. Seeing the white-bellied, brown-bodied, blue streaked birds hop about on their perches, I choke up at the thought of what Im about to do. Using dried fish to lure him over, I stroke Rocs chest through the bars for what might be the last time. You tubby little fiend, I whisper, trying not to cry. I think youll like it here. There's the sea and plains, plenty of variety for your diet. If youve forgotten how to hunt and get hungry, then you bring your flock and come find me okay? Ill be travelling south, so try to find which boat Im on. Ill probably be in the crows nest, but if you cant find me, then head south and follow the coast to Nan Ping. Therell be tons of people there, you cant miss it.I dont know why Im giving directions to a bird, but I like to pretend Roc understands me as he gobbles down the treat. I dont know if setting them free is the right thing to do or if Im consigning them to a wretched death in the wilds, but I cant put this off any longer. Theyre stressed out from being cooped up all the time, plucking their feathers and fighting amongst themselves even on the rare occasions I let them out inside my yurt. Since I dont need their feathers anymore and weve travelled to a warmer climate, its time to let them spread their wings and fly.Better to die free than live caged, right?Giving Roc one last pat, I remove the padlock and unwrap the chains to their cage, dreading seeing them fly off into the sunset, but this must be done. As soon as the chains are gone, Roc lands on the gate and uses his beak to unlatch it, so smoothly his momentum is enough to swing it open. Without saying goodbye, the poofy bird flaps his wings and takes off with a flutter of motion, leading his flock out in the unending skies and soaring off into the-...into a fallen sack of dried fish, carelessly dropped by a passing soldier.After ripping the sack to shreds and devouring its contents, my feathery friends move to harass everyone in sight, laughing as they fearlessly approach soldier and sailor alike to check their packs and pockets for food or trinkets. Fearful of injuring the birds and drawing my anger, the poor souls suffer with minimal resistance as Roc and his flock flap unchecked along the beach side. Unsatisfied by the meagre offerings provided, they soon turn to assaulting anyone who lacks the means or intent to pay tribute. As I watch the cloud of laughing beaks and scratching talons nip and claw my friends and allies, Im beset by a sinking sensation in the pit of my stomach as I realize Ive made a huge mistake.Oh dear Mother in Heaven, what horrors have I unleashed unto your world? I plea for mercy upon my soul, as this was done in ignorance and with only the best intentions.After a half-hour spent failing to trick them back into the cage and a stern visit from my unamused Mentor, I settle the avian issue by placing their perch next to my yurt and feeding them another bag of dried fish. Inwardly cursing these devious and deplorable blackmailing birds as they settle in for a post-meal nap, I take comfort in knowing some farmer or hunter will shoot them out of the skies soon after I leave in the morning. Wherever Roc and his birdies came from, I imagine it must have been a wretched land of anarchy and ruin brought about by these voracious winged vermin.As if to make up for being a pest, Roc taps his forehead against my hand, his signal for head scritches. Stupid as I am, his adorable antics bring a smile to my face and I pet him until he signals the end of touchy time with a softer-than-usual nip. Im not sure if he genuinely appreciates what Ive done or if hes exploiting my good nature, but either way, Im kinda glad he didnt just fly off into the distance.I love all my pets. If I can, Ill help them all live long and happy lives.Its a shame munching on Spiritual Plants does nothing for humans. At best, its trading Heavens bounty for little extra roughage in your diet. You might even suffer dire complications depending on the plant eaten. It hardly seems fair, but I suppose humanity is used to getting the short end of the stick and still coming out on top. Realistically, if I were an alien and knew nothing about humans aside from their physical appearance, I would hardly expect them to be the dominant species in a world with wolves, tigers, and bears, but here we are.Woo, humanity. Fuck yea!Praying my birds dont wake up and go on another rampage, I settle down for a hot dinner cooked by Charok and his adorable assistant Tali. Another reason we disembark every night, the ships don't have a kitchen, which sucks. Aside from the usual suspects joining us for dinner, Huu's half-wolf geezer and the Protectorate senior Guan Suo also make an appearance, though there's no sign of Huu himself. The old timers are like two taciturn peas in a pod, showing up for every meal and leaving without a word of praise or thanks. I dont mind the half-wolf geezer too much, hes with Huu which means hes one of us, but Guan Suo makes me uncomfortable. Not because hes an outsider or because I'm worried hell notice something strange about me feeding water to Ping-Ping, but for another, less practical reason.This chapter is updated by novelbiin.comNamely his big, floofy, red panda tail.I dont like it. Milas floofy tail is adorable and it irks me to see one so similar on this long-browed, turtle-loving weirdo. Think about it: hes a grown-ass man who spends his days masquerading as a plebeian woodcutter on the off-chance someone wants to bother his turtle friend. Ping-Ping doesnt even acknowledge him, she doesnt seem to care about anything but eating and Blobby, and by extension, me. Considering Akanai all but begged me to be on my best behaviour around him, I can tell she respects him which means hes probably an incredible warrior, but I still cant bring myself to like him. My retinue shared their gear and yurts so the Protectorate could look presentable and sleep comfortably, but I havent heard a single peep of thanks. Hell, Guan Suo is still dressed in his stinky woodsman rags. I cant stand him, he smokes while we eat, spits where we walk, and expects everyone to cater to his needs while he hides all day and presumably brushes his silky white beard and eyebrows.Hes disgusting and the sight of him fills me with loathing. Red pandas are supposed to be cute and lovable. Its a damn crime is what it is.My irrational animosity with their leader aside, Im glad the Protectorate joined up. Shabbily dressed though they might be, theyre a fine addition to the retinue. About a third of them know how to Conceal themselves and hide in plain sight, a skill Im dying to learn but requires external Chi usage. The rest are skilled scouts, trackers, and huntsmen, which will be useful in Nan Ping if food ever becomes an issue. Even if theyre only here to protect their Guardian Turtle, so long as I stick close to Ping-Ping, then its almost the same as protecting me. If we include Lang Yi and the other seventy-nine former slaves from Yo Lings island, then my two hundred and eighty strong retinue has grown to a healthy four hundred and seventy odd soldiers.Don't think about the odds. Positive Mental Attitude. Every little bit counts, right? Then again, I'm a little concerned by how everyone talks like our victory over the Defiled is all but inevitable, with no one mentioning what to do should the worst come to pass. Is it pure arrogance or fear and apprehension keeping people from speculating?Using external help is no good, children must learn to deal with their own problems.Trading incredulous stares with BoShui, we quietly leave the two old codgers as their discussion devolves into mud-slinging and name-calling. It's kinda cute seeing two old farts making friends. At least... I hope they're making friends.While escorting BoShui back to his camp with a full complement of my guards, I ask, So... exactly how many siblings do you have? And how strong is the Han Patriarch? I mean... their suggestions weren't terrible, we could do the first to buy some time then work on the second. Whos the little scamp? I should figure that out and ask her for help. Can't be the turtle, Guan Suo would never be so rude to Ping-Ping. Shrugging, BoShui answers, Two full-blooded siblings and seventeen half-siblings, but Im only comfortable murdering one or two of them without knowing which one is the true heir. The pitfalls of having a conscience I suppose. As for the Patriarch... Im not sure. Stronger than Uncle BoHai at least, or he wouldve killed my father for sending BoLao to the Confessor.Hmm... nineteen is a little more than I expected, and despite having never seen his uncle in action, Im not confident we can kill someone stronger than the eight Spiritual Weapon-wielding Major General. Dude looks awesome in his spiked boots and gauntlets, like some medieval biker gangster or something. Besides, as Clan Patriarch and one of three shot-callers of the Society, I imagine BoShuis scumbag daddy is fairly well-protected. Ugh, this is so bothersome. Is every faction in the North so full of strife or is the Han Clan an outlier? If not then were really fucked when it comes time to fight...This really begs the question: After millennia of discord and dissension, how did the Defiled overcome their enmity and band together to attack the Empire and why didnt we see it coming? There were no rumours or inklings of Defiled unification before their coordinated attack on the three Provinces, which means their alliance was less than a year in the making. How did their leader or leaders manage such a miracle? How are they communicating across such vast distances quickly enough to coordinate movements down to the minute? Do they have Defiled Radio or did they station one Defiled every kilometre and used Sending to create the longest game of broken telephone in history?So many questions but Im hardly qualified to ask them, much less put together an answer.Whatever. Putting what I just learned to use, I focus on the positives in life, chatting with my friend about training and martial skills. Even if I cant swing the outcome of the war, what I can do is put my best foot forward while doing everything I can not to start new feuds. Even better if I can make new friends, so its important I remain humble and pleasant throughout my entire stay in Nan Ping.Peace and Tranquility is a state of mind, not two weapons I use to handle my problems. Balance in all things, not just martial skills and mindset, but in social interactions and stressful situations. I will become the embodiment of friendliness and harmony. No off-hand remarks, no funny looks, no accidental insults, just a pleasant, affable young man seeking like-minded individuals to make friends with.Yea... this is going to work out great...Ah, add that to the list: No sarcastic quips.... And no eye-rolling.Or smirking.Or ogling.Or sighing..........Ah fuck it. Were probably doomed.Where my furbabies at? I need a cuddle.Chapter Meme
