Chapter 631
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Chapter 631
As the distant sounds of battle filter in through the shuttered windows, I lay in bed and pray for the blissful oblivion of sleep, but it will not come.
I expected as much before slipping under the covers, but hopes and dreams have little to do with expectations. In less than ten hours, Hongji will give the order to withdraw from Castle JiangHu and put into motion a plan which could make or break this war for the Imperial forces. The idea is to bait the Enemy forces here into chasing us for the better part of a day as we feign a withdrawal, before turning to fight and holding out long enough for our allies to close in around the Defiled flanks and set upon them from all sides. Thats the plan at least, but no plan survives contact with the Enemy, or so Im told, and theres so much that could go wrong I can hardly begin to list it all. I figured there was no point in coming to bed tonight, knowing Id be up all night plagued by thoughts adrift in a sea of angst and anxiety, but Yan insisted I at least lay down and try to rest. I was gonna fake it and slip out after an hour or two, but she came to bed with me and now Im trapped in her pale, slender embrace. Not the worst fate to suffer, and it does mean that most of my honour guard can stand down and get a few extra hours of sleep instead of following me out to the inner wall to satisfy my curiosity, but it feels so much worse not being able to do anything while worrying about my inability to do things.
Its a vicious cycle. Im anxious because I cant do anything, then I cant do anything to relieve said anxiety, which leads to more anxiety. I hate it.
At least Yan is getting some rest. Being Legate means I get a big boy bed, but we dont take up much room even with Ping Ping snoozing on my chest, Aurie sprawled out across my legs, and Mama Bun tucked into the crook of my arm, using my bicep as a pillow while she hugs my forearm tight. The red panda is also around somewhere, nestled under the covers close to Ping Ping, while Roc and his flock roost in and about the room, slumbering fitfully save for the odd snoring whistle from the darling fledglings. The rest of my pets are split up between Lin-Lin and Song, while beautiful Mila is out on the plains somewhere, no doubt busy making last minute preparations for our imminent retreat or getting as much sleep as she possibly can before the long day ahead. Mom, Akanai, Alsantset, so very many of my dear friends, and almost all my sweet moo-moos are also involved in this risky gambit, so even if everything goes perfectly to plan, theres a good chance that I will be mourning at least one of them come tomorrow evening.
Unless Im dead too, at which point Id be beyond mourning. So yea, Im having some trouble falling asleep.
It occurs to me that Yan knew Id be awake all night, but just wanted me to stay by her side, because Im not the only person around who needs comforting. Doing my best not to disturb her slumber, I angle my head to take in my beautiful wife, her expression so drained and weary even while fast asleep. Its been a tough week for her thus far, what with holding down fort Sinuji and taking part in the arduous withdrawal, and now things are about to get even harder as we dial things up to twelve and gamble with the fate of the Empire. Holding sturdy stone fortifications against the Defiled is an onerous task, but a frantic withdrawal while fending off the Defiled on the open plains of Central is a whole different beast. Out there, one mistake, one misstep, one miscommunication could spell doom for tens of thousands of soldiers, and even if each and every one of us does everything right in the battles to come, we could still lose due to no fault of our own. The second I stepped foot in Castle JiangHu and laid eyes on Yan, I almost gave in to panic and ordered her home alongside Lin-Lin, Mila, and all my pets, because I couldnt stand the thought of losing even a single one of them. Theyd never forgive me for it though, so that was the end of that, though I will say that with each passing second, I am feeling less confident about this plan.
What if the Enemy doesnt take the bait, and settles in to occupy the five abandoned castles instead? Unlike before, we intend to reoccupy Castle JiangHu once we deal with the Defiled army, so its not like we can firebomb it all like we did with all the front-line forts. This one simple fact is why I didnt want to commit so many troops to this counter-attack, but Nian Zu and Shuai Jiao claimed that even if this came to pass, it would work to our advantage since it would split the Defiled forces even further as theyd have to hold the castle and assault the neighbouring fortifications at the same time. Hardly seems like an advantage considering the bloody cost well pay to retake the castle, but the two Colonel Generals were pushing for this counter-attack so hard, I couldnt exactly say no. Well, technically, I could have, but then what? Keep fighting on the Enemys terms? If wed gone with my plan to just send reinforcements to help hold the centre, Akanai wouldnt have shown up to save Castle JiangHu and the Enemy wouldve overrun the defenders before the reinforcements arrived. Then they wouldve ridden out and torn the reinforcements to shreds before moving on to attack the neighbouring fortifications from all sides. Nian Zu and Shuai Jiao were right to push for decisive action, I see this now, but Im still not sure this was the best plan to move forward with, and in truth, I never will be.
Honestly, I dont understand how other people do this, just make decisions and move on with life, instead of over-analyzing whether or not theyve made the right choice while considering every possible negative outcome and the consequences thereafter. Are they just stupid? Do they turn their brains off or something? How is it possible to hold the lives of millions of people in your hands and be so cavalier about your actions? How do you turn off that voice in your head telling you all the things that will probably go wrong? Is it just me? Does no one else have this problem? This is why I hate making decisions and prefer to have things decided for me. I dont want to deal with all the uncertainty, so if I never make decisions, then I never have to worry about the consequences and can save myself all this stress. Im physically sweating while lying in bed, thats how bad its gotten, and I swear if my shoulders were any tighter, my head would pop like a zit and splatter my brains all over the walls.
Also, I kinda need to pee, but I know its just nerves and I dont want to wake Yan just yet, especially since I know that would only break the seal and Id have to pee again in less than an hour.
There are four other castles along the central front, while the Northern and Southern flanks hold five similar fortifications each. With only three armies in the field, and the largest by far here at Castle JiangHu, it would be foolish of the Enemy to commit almost half their manpower to chasing down our withdrawing forces and leave themselves surrounded on all sides. Zhen Shi is clearly happy to bide his time and train his Chosen, which means all his posturing and aggression might well have been done to bait me into abandoning the castle. Even if it wasnt, giving up a fortified base without a fight is awfully suspicious, and from what Ive seen, the Enemy commander doesnt strike me as the sort of fool to rush in headlong without a plan.
Then again, the same goes for Nian Zu and Shuai Jiao. My War Council assured me the Enemy would have no choice but to chase down such a tempting target, but my gut tells me the smart thing to do is to cancel the plan, batten down the hatches, and hold Castle JiangHu for as long as we are able to. Unfortunately, the wheels are already in motion, and cancelling now could have repercussions Im not yet ready to face, like public criticism from the honourable, respected, and principled Colonel General Shuai Jiao, or Nian Zus passive aggressive comments to Dad who then brings his concerns back to me. I still feel like theres something Im missing, because while catching Imperials on open ground is huge, if the Enemy occupies Castle JiangHu, theyll have plenty more chances to do the same. At some point, well have to either move to retake the castle, or else the Enemy will be perfectly positioned to intercept retreating forces when we inevitably give up the second line. In my eyes, its a no brainer for the Enemy to hold the castle, because it puts the Empire in an awkward position and gives the Defiled a fortified base right on the second line, but I do admit my cautious nature may have something to do with it.
Is it weird to hope for a bloody, hard-fought battle tomorrow, if it saves us from a bloodier, harder-fought battle in the near future?
A shame my Runic Cannons arent ready yet and wont be anytime soon. Even with the basic mechanics of the Rune figured out, itll still be a while before the Tyrant comes up with a working model, much less one which has been tested and perfected. Until such a time, well have to rely on crossbows and catapults, but having seen how many Defiled Chosen are arranged against us, Im starting to worry we didnt bring enough ammunition. Or crossbows and catapults, and irregulars to use them. I wish we didnt have to destroy the catapults we cant bring out of Castle JiangHu, but we cant risk the Defiled using them against us. We cant even leave enough of them intact to repair when we get back, because a lot of the value in my ranged weapons is the engineering behind them, what with the reinforced crossbeams, sling loaded ammo, and counterweight pulley mechanisms. We still have our mobile catapults to dish out the damage, modelled after the ones the Golden Highlands Coalition used in Sanshu, but if the Enemy learns to make full-sized catapults of their own, or worse, starts carrying around crossbows and bolts, then the Empire will be proper fucked. This was a point I had to drill into every single commander time after time. If the fortification is about to be taken, the number one priority is to burn the crossbows and catapults, because in the long run, that will probably save more lives than escaping.New novel chapters are published on
Thats the cold hard truth of war. Its a game of numbers, one the Empire is slowly, but surely, losing, and it falls on my shoulders to change this.
You know what really gets my drawers in a knot? The simple fact that my part in this is all but done with. From here on out, I am nothing more than a figurehead at best, and a burden at worst, because I can no longer affect tomorrows outcome in any meaningful way. Grandpa Du wants me to test my Oration abilities and yell stop or something mid-battle, but Im not sure itll work for a variety of reasons, including my inability to pick and choose my targets. If I try things his way, I might get everyone within range to stop fighting for an instant, but itd literally be everyone, not just the Defiled.
Or worse, what if Oration works based on language, and the tribal Defiled dont understand what Im saying? Then wed be really screwed...
Honestly, the only reason Im here is so the Death Corps and Royal Guardians can take the field, both of whom are present in lower numbers than Id like. Theres also the added benefit of semi-bluffing Zhen Shi and acting as a deterrence against Demons coming nearby, not to mention the none-too-subtle threat of carrying the Divine Ping Ping around and the effect her presence has on morale. Thats about all I bring to the table though, which means I get to twiddle my thumbs while my friends, family, loved ones, and comrades-in-arms fight for their lives in the impending battle. I hate not being able to personally contribute to the war effort anymore, even if its something as small as swinging my sword around and killing a dozen or so Defiled. I cant even string a proper longbow anymore, much less draw one, and the heaviest draw weight I can manage is a measly eighty-kilograms, which will only send an arrow about 250 meters, at best. Its my technique, probably, since I cant put my whole body into the draw like Lin-Lin and keep any semblance of good aim. Not that I could hit the broad side of a barn before, when I was still a Martial Warrior. Practice makes perfect, and I dont practice nearly enough, because lets be honest: swords are way cooler than arrows.
At least I can still use a crossbow, but the range on those things isnt all that much better, for the simple fact that crossbows require about twice the draw weight of a longbow to fire a projectile the same distance. It has something to do with length of power stroke and fixed limbs on a crossbow, but the physics all went over my head when Diyako tried to explain it and I had no advice to offer, so were stuck with 350 meter range on our crossbows unless we drastically drop rate of fire by including a hand-crank system or something. As such, Akanai deemed it too dangerous for me to join a firing line, since that would put me too close to the battlefield and within striking distance of Peak Experts and Wraiths, so I cant even use the shiny new crossbow I brought with me unless the battle really goes to hell in a hand-basket.
Lin-Lin brought her longbow though, which means even she will have more impact on the battle than I will. Feels bad man.
In short, I am once again, helpless to affect my own fate, and the fate of everyone I care about. This is almost worse than my time in the mines, because then, at least I could... not look forward to death, but romanticize it, rationalize that itd be better to reincarnate into another life and start over fresh. Despite knowing it was possible, I never could actually go through with it, because at the end of the day, I clung to the hope of a better life, and its a good thing I did. Look at where I am now. Sure, the current situation is dire as Im embroiled in a devastating war with no ability to fight and heavy responsibilities weighing me down, but putting that aside, life has never been better. I have two wives, Mila who inspires me to be better each and every day, and Yan who is my emotional rock, always fully confident in my abilities no matter the odds stacked against me. I have my sweet wifey Lin-Lin, who is always there to cheer me up and fills my heart with joy, and dutiful Luo-Luo, who I would be lost without and works day and night to support me in my financial and political endeavours, and even takes the time to try and understand my pseudo-science ramblings. Then theres Song, who I feel understands me in ways the others never will on account of our similar experiences, and Alsantset and Charok who have been nothing but kind and understanding since the day we met.
I cant forget Mom and Dad, who have given me more than even they themselves realize, which was already more than anyone should expect, and Akanai and Husolt, who not only supported and helped me along, also trusted me enough to let me marry their beloved daughter. A special mention also goes out to sweet Tali and Tate, who I still cant believe are twelve years old and already learning their trades, when it feels like just yesterday when I was swaddling them in blankets and rocking them to sleep. Taduk believed in me from the start and put not only himself at risk, but his beloved daughter too, just so he could teach me how to read, write, and gather herbs. Grandpa Du is the newest addition, but I am no less thankful to have him around, because he and I are kindred spirits in a sense, driven to learn more about the Martial Path so that we might pass our knowledge down to later generations. At great risk to himself, hes spent many an hour sitting by my side and discussing the Dao as we each see it, and while it has yet to bear fruit, I feel as if I am on the cusp of a grand discovery that could change everything in an instant.
Probably because that would give them too much individuality. Better to name them after colours and objects to remind them of what they are: property, rather than people. Stifling my sigh so Teal Three doesnt think Im upset with him, I gesture towards the outer walls and the Defiled beyond it. What do you know about the Defiled?
They are the Fathers foul minions who seek to destroy everything the Holy Mother Above has wrought.
There is no religious fervour in his tone or reverent glint in his eyes, as Teal Three is merely offering a rote response to a basic question any three year old in the Empire can answer. Why? Why must they destroy, is that their purpose? Doubtful, else the Defiled would have been eradicated by internecine conflict millennia ago. They form tribes, raise families, create their own languages, so surely this means they are capable of co-existing with one another. If this is the case, then what drives them to conflict with the Empire?
This... one does not know, Imperial Legate.
You dont have to address me in every sentence. Care to hazard a guess?
This one lacks the information required to offer any worthwhile conjecture, as this is his first encounter with the Enemy.
Teal Three is fairly eloquent as far as Death Corps Warriors go, which means its possible he, like Kuang Biao, used to be a Royal Guardian. Are you a Peak Expert? Teal Three nods, and I follow up with, If you dont mind sharing your age, Id be interested in hearing it.
After a moments hesitation to register the choice before him, Teal Three responds, This one is forty-five years of age.
Young as far as Peak Experts go, and the minor straightening of his back doesnt go unnoticed, showing he takes pride in his skills. Impressive. How is it youve never faced the Defiled before? I get the lack of incursions, but does the Eastern Province not have any outbreaks of local Defiled?
Again, he hesitates, and I can see the struggle in his expression as his Oaths force him to toe the line. There are, but not many, as the Eastern province is small and the population densely packed together, making it difficult for Defiled tendencies to go unnoticed.
Interesting. I didnt know the population was densely packed, which means there are probably more Easterners than I initially suspected. I was guessing in the low millions, but if theyre all packed together throughout the entire province, who knows how many there are over there? I first came into contact with the Defiled about nine years ago, though I didnt know it at the time.
...In the slave mines? Surprised by the interruption, I turn to Teal Three with a raised eyebrow, and he quickly falls to his knees, though his head is still raised and eyes fixed on the window to protect me from harm. This one begs Imperial Legate for forgiveness, or failing this, a swift death.
No offence taken, I say, gesturing for him to stand. I was just surprised is all. Yes, from my time as a slave, in the Canston Trading Groups mines. I was just twelve and didnt know much of the world, so I didnt realize my captors were Defiled. They tormented me every day for their own, sick amusement, and encouraged the slaves to harass one another too. Every few days, theyd torture some poor soul to death while the rest of us watched, usually over the most minor infractions and sometimes for no reason at all. It was not a pleasant experience, but lately, I find myself reflecting on that time more and more.
...Why?
Having lost myself in my thoughts once more, Teal Threes belated response takes me by surprise again. Because I still dont understand what their goal was. Why were we mining there? Not for any ore I recognize, nor were we equipped with the tools a proper stone quarry would require. Why did they feel the need to torment us, yet to take such care as to not cripple anyone? The illogical manner in which they chose their victims and the consistent number of deaths makes me wonder if they had a death quota to keep up, but why? It wasnt to turn any of us Defiled, else they wouldve encouraged deviant, violent behaviour or forced us to consume human flesh or something. No, they had a different purpose, one I still dont understand, and that bothers me, even more than the nightmares of torments past.
Well, now I know they were trying to set up an Anathema factory or something, but thats not public knowledge yet and probably never will be. Still, It reeks too much of coincidence for one amber-eyed slave to survive and head off into the wilderness, just to find the only group of people within a hundred kilometres who cared enough to save him. Extraordinary coincidence or Divine intervention, its impossible to prove beyond a reasonable doubt, and if its the latter, then Id be furious at the Mother Above for dropping me off in the deep end without any warning. Thats not how you teach kids to swim, Lady. Give them some water wings and start them where they can stand or something.
Realizing Ive fallen silent again, I find Teal Three still standing vigil beside me, and figure the poor guy could use a break. Closing the shutters, I shuffle over to the tea table and take a seat there instead, gesturing for my reluctant companion to take the chair across from me. The other Death Corps guards in the room stay at their posts, and I cant tell if theyre jealous or relieved at all the attention Teal Three is getting, but Im tired of monologuing to myself all the time, so I might as well keep talking out loud. Lately, Ive been wondering why I survived when so many others didnt. In truth, I should have died there, but through some... miracle of Heaven, I didnt, and it makes me want to believe I was saved for a purpose. Gesturing at the battlefield, I give a wry smile and add, Maybe even this purpose. Except... I dont know what I am supposed to do. How do we win this war?
You command, Imperial Legate, Teal Three replies, offering me a seated salute. And the Death Corps will obey. These are the trials and tribulations laid out before us, and all we can do is persevere through them.
Given that theyre Oath-sworn slaves compelled to do so, Teal Threes words shouldnt make me feel better, but something in his delivery buoys my spirits, a solemn, almost eager desire to follow my lead. Its not much, but its something, so I accept the gesture with a grateful nod before bidding him a silent farewell and shuffling back into my room to take my place at Yans side. Though she stirs in her sleep, she doesnt wake as I slip back under the covers, even snuggling in close until her forehead is resting against my cheek. Ping Ping likewise clambers back atop my chest while Aurie makes room for my feet to slide under him, and as Mama Bun flops back into the crook of my arm, I realize Ive been a fool for worrying so much. Ive done all I can, but I am not alone. I have family, friends, comrades, and soldiers to rely on, and I would be foolish not to. Its Imperial Army doctrine 101, no man is an island, and a lesson I would do well to not soon forget.
Tomorrow, the heroes of the Empire will do battle against the Defiled on the open plains of Central, and for better or for worse, we will get through this trial and tribulation together.
Chapter Meme
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Chapter 631
As the distant sounds of battle filter in through the shuttered windows, I lay in bed and pray for the blissful oblivion of sleep, but it will not come.
I expected as much before slipping under the covers, but hopes and dreams have little to do with expectations. In less than ten hours, Hongji will give the order to withdraw from Castle JiangHu and put into motion a plan which could make or break this war for the Imperial forces. The idea is to bait the Enemy forces here into chasing us for the better part of a day as we feign a withdrawal, before turning to fight and holding out long enough for our allies to close in around the Defiled flanks and set upon them from all sides. Thats the plan at least, but no plan survives contact with the Enemy, or so Im told, and theres so much that could go wrong I can hardly begin to list it all. I figured there was no point in coming to bed tonight, knowing Id be up all night plagued by thoughts adrift in a sea of angst and anxiety, but Yan insisted I at least lay down and try to rest. I was gonna fake it and slip out after an hour or two, but she came to bed with me and now Im trapped in her pale, slender embrace. Not the worst fate to suffer, and it does mean that most of my honour guard can stand down and get a few extra hours of sleep instead of following me out to the inner wall to satisfy my curiosity, but it feels so much worse not being able to do anything while worrying about my inability to do things.
Its a vicious cycle. Im anxious because I cant do anything, then I cant do anything to relieve said anxiety, which leads to more anxiety. I hate it.
At least Yan is getting some rest. Being Legate means I get a big boy bed, but we dont take up much room even with Ping Ping snoozing on my chest, Aurie sprawled out across my legs, and Mama Bun tucked into the crook of my arm, using my bicep as a pillow while she hugs my forearm tight. The red panda is also around somewhere, nestled under the covers close to Ping Ping, while Roc and his flock roost in and about the room, slumbering fitfully save for the odd snoring whistle from the darling fledglings. The rest of my pets are split up between Lin-Lin and Song, while beautiful Mila is out on the plains somewhere, no doubt busy making last minute preparations for our imminent retreat or getting as much sleep as she possibly can before the long day ahead. Mom, Akanai, Alsantset, so very many of my dear friends, and almost all my sweet moo-moos are also involved in this risky gambit, so even if everything goes perfectly to plan, theres a good chance that I will be mourning at least one of them come tomorrow evening.
Unless Im dead too, at which point Id be beyond mourning. So yea, Im having some trouble falling asleep.
It occurs to me that Yan knew Id be awake all night, but just wanted me to stay by her side, because Im not the only person around who needs comforting. Doing my best not to disturb her slumber, I angle my head to take in my beautiful wife, her expression so drained and weary even while fast asleep. Its been a tough week for her thus far, what with holding down fort Sinuji and taking part in the arduous withdrawal, and now things are about to get even harder as we dial things up to twelve and gamble with the fate of the Empire. Holding sturdy stone fortifications against the Defiled is an onerous task, but a frantic withdrawal while fending off the Defiled on the open plains of Central is a whole different beast. Out there, one mistake, one misstep, one miscommunication could spell doom for tens of thousands of soldiers, and even if each and every one of us does everything right in the battles to come, we could still lose due to no fault of our own. The second I stepped foot in Castle JiangHu and laid eyes on Yan, I almost gave in to panic and ordered her home alongside Lin-Lin, Mila, and all my pets, because I couldnt stand the thought of losing even a single one of them. Theyd never forgive me for it though, so that was the end of that, though I will say that with each passing second, I am feeling less confident about this plan.
What if the Enemy doesnt take the bait, and settles in to occupy the five abandoned castles instead? Unlike before, we intend to reoccupy Castle JiangHu once we deal with the Defiled army, so its not like we can firebomb it all like we did with all the front-line forts. This one simple fact is why I didnt want to commit so many troops to this counter-attack, but Nian Zu and Shuai Jiao claimed that even if this came to pass, it would work to our advantage since it would split the Defiled forces even further as theyd have to hold the castle and assault the neighbouring fortifications at the same time. Hardly seems like an advantage considering the bloody cost well pay to retake the castle, but the two Colonel Generals were pushing for this counter-attack so hard, I couldnt exactly say no. Well, technically, I could have, but then what? Keep fighting on the Enemys terms? If wed gone with my plan to just send reinforcements to help hold the centre, Akanai wouldnt have shown up to save Castle JiangHu and the Enemy wouldve overrun the defenders before the reinforcements arrived. Then they wouldve ridden out and torn the reinforcements to shreds before moving on to attack the neighbouring fortifications from all sides. Nian Zu and Shuai Jiao were right to push for decisive action, I see this now, but Im still not sure this was the best plan to move forward with, and in truth, I never will be.
Honestly, I dont understand how other people do this, just make decisions and move on with life, instead of over-analyzing whether or not theyve made the right choice while considering every possible negative outcome and the consequences thereafter. Are they just stupid? Do they turn their brains off or something? How is it possible to hold the lives of millions of people in your hands and be so cavalier about your actions? How do you turn off that voice in your head telling you all the things that will probably go wrong? Is it just me? Does no one else have this problem? This is why I hate making decisions and prefer to have things decided for me. I dont want to deal with all the uncertainty, so if I never make decisions, then I never have to worry about the consequences and can save myself all this stress. Im physically sweating while lying in bed, thats how bad its gotten, and I swear if my shoulders were any tighter, my head would pop like a zit and splatter my brains all over the walls.
Also, I kinda need to pee, but I know its just nerves and I dont want to wake Yan just yet, especially since I know that would only break the seal and Id have to pee again in less than an hour.
There are four other castles along the central front, while the Northern and Southern flanks hold five similar fortifications each. With only three armies in the field, and the largest by far here at Castle JiangHu, it would be foolish of the Enemy to commit almost half their manpower to chasing down our withdrawing forces and leave themselves surrounded on all sides. Zhen Shi is clearly happy to bide his time and train his Chosen, which means all his posturing and aggression might well have been done to bait me into abandoning the castle. Even if it wasnt, giving up a fortified base without a fight is awfully suspicious, and from what Ive seen, the Enemy commander doesnt strike me as the sort of fool to rush in headlong without a plan.
Then again, the same goes for Nian Zu and Shuai Jiao. My War Council assured me the Enemy would have no choice but to chase down such a tempting target, but my gut tells me the smart thing to do is to cancel the plan, batten down the hatches, and hold Castle JiangHu for as long as we are able to. Unfortunately, the wheels are already in motion, and cancelling now could have repercussions Im not yet ready to face, like public criticism from the honourable, respected, and principled Colonel General Shuai Jiao, or Nian Zus passive aggressive comments to Dad who then brings his concerns back to me. I still feel like theres something Im missing, because while catching Imperials on open ground is huge, if the Enemy occupies Castle JiangHu, theyll have plenty more chances to do the same. At some point, well have to either move to retake the castle, or else the Enemy will be perfectly positioned to intercept retreating forces when we inevitably give up the second line. In my eyes, its a no brainer for the Enemy to hold the castle, because it puts the Empire in an awkward position and gives the Defiled a fortified base right on the second line, but I do admit my cautious nature may have something to do with it.
Is it weird to hope for a bloody, hard-fought battle tomorrow, if it saves us from a bloodier, harder-fought battle in the near future?
A shame my Runic Cannons arent ready yet and wont be anytime soon. Even with the basic mechanics of the Rune figured out, itll still be a while before the Tyrant comes up with a working model, much less one which has been tested and perfected. Until such a time, well have to rely on crossbows and catapults, but having seen how many Defiled Chosen are arranged against us, Im starting to worry we didnt bring enough ammunition. Or crossbows and catapults, and irregulars to use them. I wish we didnt have to destroy the catapults we cant bring out of Castle JiangHu, but we cant risk the Defiled using them against us. We cant even leave enough of them intact to repair when we get back, because a lot of the value in my ranged weapons is the engineering behind them, what with the reinforced crossbeams, sling loaded ammo, and counterweight pulley mechanisms. We still have our mobile catapults to dish out the damage, modelled after the ones the Golden Highlands Coalition used in Sanshu, but if the Enemy learns to make full-sized catapults of their own, or worse, starts carrying around crossbows and bolts, then the Empire will be proper fucked. This was a point I had to drill into every single commander time after time. If the fortification is about to be taken, the number one priority is to burn the crossbows and catapults, because in the long run, that will probably save more lives than escaping.New novel chapters are published on
Thats the cold hard truth of war. Its a game of numbers, one the Empire is slowly, but surely, losing, and it falls on my shoulders to change this.
You know what really gets my drawers in a knot? The simple fact that my part in this is all but done with. From here on out, I am nothing more than a figurehead at best, and a burden at worst, because I can no longer affect tomorrows outcome in any meaningful way. Grandpa Du wants me to test my Oration abilities and yell stop or something mid-battle, but Im not sure itll work for a variety of reasons, including my inability to pick and choose my targets. If I try things his way, I might get everyone within range to stop fighting for an instant, but itd literally be everyone, not just the Defiled.
Or worse, what if Oration works based on language, and the tribal Defiled dont understand what Im saying? Then wed be really screwed...
Honestly, the only reason Im here is so the Death Corps and Royal Guardians can take the field, both of whom are present in lower numbers than Id like. Theres also the added benefit of semi-bluffing Zhen Shi and acting as a deterrence against Demons coming nearby, not to mention the none-too-subtle threat of carrying the Divine Ping Ping around and the effect her presence has on morale. Thats about all I bring to the table though, which means I get to twiddle my thumbs while my friends, family, loved ones, and comrades-in-arms fight for their lives in the impending battle. I hate not being able to personally contribute to the war effort anymore, even if its something as small as swinging my sword around and killing a dozen or so Defiled. I cant even string a proper longbow anymore, much less draw one, and the heaviest draw weight I can manage is a measly eighty-kilograms, which will only send an arrow about 250 meters, at best. Its my technique, probably, since I cant put my whole body into the draw like Lin-Lin and keep any semblance of good aim. Not that I could hit the broad side of a barn before, when I was still a Martial Warrior. Practice makes perfect, and I dont practice nearly enough, because lets be honest: swords are way cooler than arrows.
At least I can still use a crossbow, but the range on those things isnt all that much better, for the simple fact that crossbows require about twice the draw weight of a longbow to fire a projectile the same distance. It has something to do with length of power stroke and fixed limbs on a crossbow, but the physics all went over my head when Diyako tried to explain it and I had no advice to offer, so were stuck with 350 meter range on our crossbows unless we drastically drop rate of fire by including a hand-crank system or something. As such, Akanai deemed it too dangerous for me to join a firing line, since that would put me too close to the battlefield and within striking distance of Peak Experts and Wraiths, so I cant even use the shiny new crossbow I brought with me unless the battle really goes to hell in a hand-basket.
Lin-Lin brought her longbow though, which means even she will have more impact on the battle than I will. Feels bad man.
In short, I am once again, helpless to affect my own fate, and the fate of everyone I care about. This is almost worse than my time in the mines, because then, at least I could... not look forward to death, but romanticize it, rationalize that itd be better to reincarnate into another life and start over fresh. Despite knowing it was possible, I never could actually go through with it, because at the end of the day, I clung to the hope of a better life, and its a good thing I did. Look at where I am now. Sure, the current situation is dire as Im embroiled in a devastating war with no ability to fight and heavy responsibilities weighing me down, but putting that aside, life has never been better. I have two wives, Mila who inspires me to be better each and every day, and Yan who is my emotional rock, always fully confident in my abilities no matter the odds stacked against me. I have my sweet wifey Lin-Lin, who is always there to cheer me up and fills my heart with joy, and dutiful Luo-Luo, who I would be lost without and works day and night to support me in my financial and political endeavours, and even takes the time to try and understand my pseudo-science ramblings. Then theres Song, who I feel understands me in ways the others never will on account of our similar experiences, and Alsantset and Charok who have been nothing but kind and understanding since the day we met.
I cant forget Mom and Dad, who have given me more than even they themselves realize, which was already more than anyone should expect, and Akanai and Husolt, who not only supported and helped me along, also trusted me enough to let me marry their beloved daughter. A special mention also goes out to sweet Tali and Tate, who I still cant believe are twelve years old and already learning their trades, when it feels like just yesterday when I was swaddling them in blankets and rocking them to sleep. Taduk believed in me from the start and put not only himself at risk, but his beloved daughter too, just so he could teach me how to read, write, and gather herbs. Grandpa Du is the newest addition, but I am no less thankful to have him around, because he and I are kindred spirits in a sense, driven to learn more about the Martial Path so that we might pass our knowledge down to later generations. At great risk to himself, hes spent many an hour sitting by my side and discussing the Dao as we each see it, and while it has yet to bear fruit, I feel as if I am on the cusp of a grand discovery that could change everything in an instant.
Probably because that would give them too much individuality. Better to name them after colours and objects to remind them of what they are: property, rather than people. Stifling my sigh so Teal Three doesnt think Im upset with him, I gesture towards the outer walls and the Defiled beyond it. What do you know about the Defiled?
They are the Fathers foul minions who seek to destroy everything the Holy Mother Above has wrought.
There is no religious fervour in his tone or reverent glint in his eyes, as Teal Three is merely offering a rote response to a basic question any three year old in the Empire can answer. Why? Why must they destroy, is that their purpose? Doubtful, else the Defiled would have been eradicated by internecine conflict millennia ago. They form tribes, raise families, create their own languages, so surely this means they are capable of co-existing with one another. If this is the case, then what drives them to conflict with the Empire?
This... one does not know, Imperial Legate.
You dont have to address me in every sentence. Care to hazard a guess?
This one lacks the information required to offer any worthwhile conjecture, as this is his first encounter with the Enemy.
Teal Three is fairly eloquent as far as Death Corps Warriors go, which means its possible he, like Kuang Biao, used to be a Royal Guardian. Are you a Peak Expert? Teal Three nods, and I follow up with, If you dont mind sharing your age, Id be interested in hearing it.
After a moments hesitation to register the choice before him, Teal Three responds, This one is forty-five years of age.
Young as far as Peak Experts go, and the minor straightening of his back doesnt go unnoticed, showing he takes pride in his skills. Impressive. How is it youve never faced the Defiled before? I get the lack of incursions, but does the Eastern Province not have any outbreaks of local Defiled?
Again, he hesitates, and I can see the struggle in his expression as his Oaths force him to toe the line. There are, but not many, as the Eastern province is small and the population densely packed together, making it difficult for Defiled tendencies to go unnoticed.
Interesting. I didnt know the population was densely packed, which means there are probably more Easterners than I initially suspected. I was guessing in the low millions, but if theyre all packed together throughout the entire province, who knows how many there are over there? I first came into contact with the Defiled about nine years ago, though I didnt know it at the time.
...In the slave mines? Surprised by the interruption, I turn to Teal Three with a raised eyebrow, and he quickly falls to his knees, though his head is still raised and eyes fixed on the window to protect me from harm. This one begs Imperial Legate for forgiveness, or failing this, a swift death.
No offence taken, I say, gesturing for him to stand. I was just surprised is all. Yes, from my time as a slave, in the Canston Trading Groups mines. I was just twelve and didnt know much of the world, so I didnt realize my captors were Defiled. They tormented me every day for their own, sick amusement, and encouraged the slaves to harass one another too. Every few days, theyd torture some poor soul to death while the rest of us watched, usually over the most minor infractions and sometimes for no reason at all. It was not a pleasant experience, but lately, I find myself reflecting on that time more and more.
...Why?
Having lost myself in my thoughts once more, Teal Threes belated response takes me by surprise again. Because I still dont understand what their goal was. Why were we mining there? Not for any ore I recognize, nor were we equipped with the tools a proper stone quarry would require. Why did they feel the need to torment us, yet to take such care as to not cripple anyone? The illogical manner in which they chose their victims and the consistent number of deaths makes me wonder if they had a death quota to keep up, but why? It wasnt to turn any of us Defiled, else they wouldve encouraged deviant, violent behaviour or forced us to consume human flesh or something. No, they had a different purpose, one I still dont understand, and that bothers me, even more than the nightmares of torments past.
Well, now I know they were trying to set up an Anathema factory or something, but thats not public knowledge yet and probably never will be. Still, It reeks too much of coincidence for one amber-eyed slave to survive and head off into the wilderness, just to find the only group of people within a hundred kilometres who cared enough to save him. Extraordinary coincidence or Divine intervention, its impossible to prove beyond a reasonable doubt, and if its the latter, then Id be furious at the Mother Above for dropping me off in the deep end without any warning. Thats not how you teach kids to swim, Lady. Give them some water wings and start them where they can stand or something.
Realizing Ive fallen silent again, I find Teal Three still standing vigil beside me, and figure the poor guy could use a break. Closing the shutters, I shuffle over to the tea table and take a seat there instead, gesturing for my reluctant companion to take the chair across from me. The other Death Corps guards in the room stay at their posts, and I cant tell if theyre jealous or relieved at all the attention Teal Three is getting, but Im tired of monologuing to myself all the time, so I might as well keep talking out loud. Lately, Ive been wondering why I survived when so many others didnt. In truth, I should have died there, but through some... miracle of Heaven, I didnt, and it makes me want to believe I was saved for a purpose. Gesturing at the battlefield, I give a wry smile and add, Maybe even this purpose. Except... I dont know what I am supposed to do. How do we win this war?
You command, Imperial Legate, Teal Three replies, offering me a seated salute. And the Death Corps will obey. These are the trials and tribulations laid out before us, and all we can do is persevere through them.
Given that theyre Oath-sworn slaves compelled to do so, Teal Threes words shouldnt make me feel better, but something in his delivery buoys my spirits, a solemn, almost eager desire to follow my lead. Its not much, but its something, so I accept the gesture with a grateful nod before bidding him a silent farewell and shuffling back into my room to take my place at Yans side. Though she stirs in her sleep, she doesnt wake as I slip back under the covers, even snuggling in close until her forehead is resting against my cheek. Ping Ping likewise clambers back atop my chest while Aurie makes room for my feet to slide under him, and as Mama Bun flops back into the crook of my arm, I realize Ive been a fool for worrying so much. Ive done all I can, but I am not alone. I have family, friends, comrades, and soldiers to rely on, and I would be foolish not to. Its Imperial Army doctrine 101, no man is an island, and a lesson I would do well to not soon forget.
Tomorrow, the heroes of the Empire will do battle against the Defiled on the open plains of Central, and for better or for worse, we will get through this trial and tribulation together.
Chapter Meme
Chapter 631As the distant sounds of battle filter in through the shuttered windows, I lay in bed and pray for the blissful oblivion of sleep, but it will not come.I expected as much before slipping under the covers, but hopes and dreams have little to do with expectations. In less than ten hours, Hongji will give the order to withdraw from Castle JiangHu and put into motion a plan which could make or break this war for the Imperial forces. The idea is to bait the Enemy forces here into chasing us for the better part of a day as we feign a withdrawal, before turning to fight and holding out long enough for our allies to close in around the Defiled flanks and set upon them from all sides. Thats the plan at least, but no plan survives contact with the Enemy, or so Im told, and theres so much that could go wrong I can hardly begin to list it all. I figured there was no point in coming to bed tonight, knowing Id be up all night plagued by thoughts adrift in a sea of angst and anxiety, but Yan insisted I at least lay down and try to rest. I was gonna fake it and slip out after an hour or two, but she came to bed with me and now Im trapped in her pale, slender embrace. Not the worst fate to suffer, and it does mean that most of my honour guard can stand down and get a few extra hours of sleep instead of following me out to the inner wall to satisfy my curiosity, but it feels so much worse not being able to do anything while worrying about my inability to do things.Its a vicious cycle. Im anxious because I cant do anything, then I cant do anything to relieve said anxiety, which leads to more anxiety. I hate it.At least Yan is getting some rest. Being Legate means I get a big boy bed, but we dont take up much room even with Ping Ping snoozing on my chest, Aurie sprawled out across my legs, and Mama Bun tucked into the crook of my arm, using my bicep as a pillow while she hugs my forearm tight. The red panda is also around somewhere, nestled under the covers close to Ping Ping, while Roc and his flock roost in and about the room, slumbering fitfully save for the odd snoring whistle from the darling fledglings. The rest of my pets are split up between Lin-Lin and Song, while beautiful Mila is out on the plains somewhere, no doubt busy making last minute preparations for our imminent retreat or getting as much sleep as she possibly can before the long day ahead. Mom, Akanai, Alsantset, so very many of my dear friends, and almost all my sweet moo-moos are also involved in this risky gambit, so even if everything goes perfectly to plan, theres a good chance that I will be mourning at least one of them come tomorrow evening.Unless Im dead too, at which point Id be beyond mourning. So yea, Im having some trouble falling asleep.It occurs to me that Yan knew Id be awake all night, but just wanted me to stay by her side, because Im not the only person around who needs comforting. Doing my best not to disturb her slumber, I angle my head to take in my beautiful wife, her expression so drained and weary even while fast asleep. Its been a tough week for her thus far, what with holding down fort Sinuji and taking part in the arduous withdrawal, and now things are about to get even harder as we dial things up to twelve and gamble with the fate of the Empire. Holding sturdy stone fortifications against the Defiled is an onerous task, but a frantic withdrawal while fending off the Defiled on the open plains of Central is a whole different beast. Out there, one mistake, one misstep, one miscommunication could spell doom for tens of thousands of soldiers, and even if each and every one of us does everything right in the battles to come, we could still lose due to no fault of our own. The second I stepped foot in Castle JiangHu and laid eyes on Yan, I almost gave in to panic and ordered her home alongside Lin-Lin, Mila, and all my pets, because I couldnt stand the thought of losing even a single one of them. Theyd never forgive me for it though, so that was the end of that, though I will say that with each passing second, I am feeling less confident about this plan.What if the Enemy doesnt take the bait, and settles in to occupy the five abandoned castles instead? Unlike before, we intend to reoccupy Castle JiangHu once we deal with the Defiled army, so its not like we can firebomb it all like we did with all the front-line forts. This one simple fact is why I didnt want to commit so many troops to this counter-attack, but Nian Zu and Shuai Jiao claimed that even if this came to pass, it would work to our advantage since it would split the Defiled forces even further as theyd have to hold the castle and assault the neighbouring fortifications at the same time. Hardly seems like an advantage considering the bloody cost well pay to retake the castle, but the two Colonel Generals were pushing for this counter-attack so hard, I couldnt exactly say no. Well, technically, I could have, but then what? Keep fighting on the Enemys terms? If wed gone with my plan to just send reinforcements to help hold the centre, Akanai wouldnt have shown up to save Castle JiangHu and the Enemy wouldve overrun the defenders before the reinforcements arrived. Then they wouldve ridden out and torn the reinforcements to shreds before moving on to attack the neighbouring fortifications from all sides. Nian Zu and Shuai Jiao were right to push for decisive action, I see this now, but Im still not sure this was the best plan to move forward with, and in truth, I never will be.Honestly, I dont understand how other people do this, just make decisions and move on with life, instead of over-analyzing whether or not theyve made the right choice while considering every possible negative outcome and the consequences thereafter. Are they just stupid? Do they turn their brains off or something? How is it possible to hold the lives of millions of people in your hands and be so cavalier about your actions? How do you turn off that voice in your head telling you all the things that will probably go wrong? Is it just me? Does no one else have this problem? This is why I hate making decisions and prefer to have things decided for me. I dont want to deal with all the uncertainty, so if I never make decisions, then I never have to worry about the consequences and can save myself all this stress. Im physically sweating while lying in bed, thats how bad its gotten, and I swear if my shoulders were any tighter, my head would pop like a zit and splatter my brains all over the walls.Also, I kinda need to pee, but I know its just nerves and I dont want to wake Yan just yet, especially since I know that would only break the seal and Id have to pee again in less than an hour.There are four other castles along the central front, while the Northern and Southern flanks hold five similar fortifications each. With only three armies in the field, and the largest by far here at Castle JiangHu, it would be foolish of the Enemy to commit almost half their manpower to chasing down our withdrawing forces and leave themselves surrounded on all sides. Zhen Shi is clearly happy to bide his time and train his Chosen, which means all his posturing and aggression might well have been done to bait me into abandoning the castle. Even if it wasnt, giving up a fortified base without a fight is awfully suspicious, and from what Ive seen, the Enemy commander doesnt strike me as the sort of fool to rush in headlong without a plan.Then again, the same goes for Nian Zu and Shuai Jiao. My War Council assured me the Enemy would have no choice but to chase down such a tempting target, but my gut tells me the smart thing to do is to cancel the plan, batten down the hatches, and hold Castle JiangHu for as long as we are able to. Unfortunately, the wheels are already in motion, and cancelling now could have repercussions Im not yet ready to face, like public criticism from the honourable, respected, and principled Colonel General Shuai Jiao, or Nian Zus passive aggressive comments to Dad who then brings his concerns back to me. I still feel like theres something Im missing, because while catching Imperials on open ground is huge, if the Enemy occupies Castle JiangHu, theyll have plenty more chances to do the same. At some point, well have to either move to retake the castle, or else the Enemy will be perfectly positioned to intercept retreating forces when we inevitably give up the second line. In my eyes, its a no brainer for the Enemy to hold the castle, because it puts the Empire in an awkward position and gives the Defiled a fortified base right on the second line, but I do admit my cautious nature may have something to do with it.Is it weird to hope for a bloody, hard-fought battle tomorrow, if it saves us from a bloodier, harder-fought battle in the near future?A shame my Runic Cannons arent ready yet and wont be anytime soon. Even with the basic mechanics of the Rune figured out, itll still be a while before the Tyrant comes up with a working model, much less one which has been tested and perfected. Until such a time, well have to rely on crossbows and catapults, but having seen how many Defiled Chosen are arranged against us, Im starting to worry we didnt bring enough ammunition. Or crossbows and catapults, and irregulars to use them. I wish we didnt have to destroy the catapults we cant bring out of Castle JiangHu, but we cant risk the Defiled using them against us. We cant even leave enough of them intact to repair when we get back, because a lot of the value in my ranged weapons is the engineering behind them, what with the reinforced crossbeams, sling loaded ammo, and counterweight pulley mechanisms. We still have our mobile catapults to dish out the damage, modelled after the ones the Golden Highlands Coalition used in Sanshu, but if the Enemy learns to make full-sized catapults of their own, or worse, starts carrying around crossbows and bolts, then the Empire will be proper fucked. This was a point I had to drill into every single commander time after time. If the fortification is about to be taken, the number one priority is to burn the crossbows and catapults, because in the long run, that will probably save more lives than escaping.New novel chapters are published onThats the cold hard truth of war. Its a game of numbers, one the Empire is slowly, but surely, losing, and it falls on my shoulders to change this.You know what really gets my drawers in a knot? The simple fact that my part in this is all but done with. From here on out, I am nothing more than a figurehead at best, and a burden at worst, because I can no longer affect tomorrows outcome in any meaningful way. Grandpa Du wants me to test my Oration abilities and yell stop or something mid-battle, but Im not sure itll work for a variety of reasons, including my inability to pick and choose my targets. If I try things his way, I might get everyone within range to stop fighting for an instant, but itd literally be everyone, not just the Defiled.Or worse, what if Oration works based on language, and the tribal Defiled dont understand what Im saying? Then wed be really screwed...Honestly, the only reason Im here is so the Death Corps and Royal Guardians can take the field, both of whom are present in lower numbers than Id like. Theres also the added benefit of semi-bluffing Zhen Shi and acting as a deterrence against Demons coming nearby, not to mention the none-too-subtle threat of carrying the Divine Ping Ping around and the effect her presence has on morale. Thats about all I bring to the table though, which means I get to twiddle my thumbs while my friends, family, loved ones, and comrades-in-arms fight for their lives in the impending battle. I hate not being able to personally contribute to the war effort anymore, even if its something as small as swinging my sword around and killing a dozen or so Defiled. I cant even string a proper longbow anymore, much less draw one, and the heaviest draw weight I can manage is a measly eighty-kilograms, which will only send an arrow about 250 meters, at best. Its my technique, probably, since I cant put my whole body into the draw like Lin-Lin and keep any semblance of good aim. Not that I could hit the broad side of a barn before, when I was still a Martial Warrior. Practice makes perfect, and I dont practice nearly enough, because lets be honest: swords are way cooler than arrows.At least I can still use a crossbow, but the range on those things isnt all that much better, for the simple fact that crossbows require about twice the draw weight of a longbow to fire a projectile the same distance. It has something to do with length of power stroke and fixed limbs on a crossbow, but the physics all went over my head when Diyako tried to explain it and I had no advice to offer, so were stuck with 350 meter range on our crossbows unless we drastically drop rate of fire by including a hand-crank system or something. As such, Akanai deemed it too dangerous for me to join a firing line, since that would put me too close to the battlefield and within striking distance of Peak Experts and Wraiths, so I cant even use the shiny new crossbow I brought with me unless the battle really goes to hell in a hand-basket.Lin-Lin brought her longbow though, which means even she will have more impact on the battle than I will. Feels bad man.In short, I am once again, helpless to affect my own fate, and the fate of everyone I care about. This is almost worse than my time in the mines, because then, at least I could... not look forward to death, but romanticize it, rationalize that itd be better to reincarnate into another life and start over fresh. Despite knowing it was possible, I never could actually go through with it, because at the end of the day, I clung to the hope of a better life, and its a good thing I did. Look at where I am now. Sure, the current situation is dire as Im embroiled in a devastating war with no ability to fight and heavy responsibilities weighing me down, but putting that aside, life has never been better. I have two wives, Mila who inspires me to be better each and every day, and Yan who is my emotional rock, always fully confident in my abilities no matter the odds stacked against me. I have my sweet wifey Lin-Lin, who is always there to cheer me up and fills my heart with joy, and dutiful Luo-Luo, who I would be lost without and works day and night to support me in my financial and political endeavours, and even takes the time to try and understand my pseudo-science ramblings. Then theres Song, who I feel understands me in ways the others never will on account of our similar experiences, and Alsantset and Charok who have been nothing but kind and understanding since the day we met.I cant forget Mom and Dad, who have given me more than even they themselves realize, which was already more than anyone should expect, and Akanai and Husolt, who not only supported and helped me along, also trusted me enough to let me marry their beloved daughter. A special mention also goes out to sweet Tali and Tate, who I still cant believe are twelve years old and already learning their trades, when it feels like just yesterday when I was swaddling them in blankets and rocking them to sleep. Taduk believed in me from the start and put not only himself at risk, but his beloved daughter too, just so he could teach me how to read, write, and gather herbs. Grandpa Du is the newest addition, but I am no less thankful to have him around, because he and I are kindred spirits in a sense, driven to learn more about the Martial Path so that we might pass our knowledge down to later generations. At great risk to himself, hes spent many an hour sitting by my side and discussing the Dao as we each see it, and while it has yet to bear fruit, I feel as if I am on the cusp of a grand discovery that could change everything in an instant.Probably because that would give them too much individuality. Better to name them after colours and objects to remind them of what they are: property, rather than people. Stifling my sigh so Teal Three doesnt think Im upset with him, I gesture towards the outer walls and the Defiled beyond it. What do you know about the Defiled?They are the Fathers foul minions who seek to destroy everything the Holy Mother Above has wrought.There is no religious fervour in his tone or reverent glint in his eyes, as Teal Three is merely offering a rote response to a basic question any three year old in the Empire can answer. Why? Why must they destroy, is that their purpose? Doubtful, else the Defiled would have been eradicated by internecine conflict millennia ago. They form tribes, raise families, create their own languages, so surely this means they are capable of co-existing with one another. If this is the case, then what drives them to conflict with the Empire?This... one does not know, Imperial Legate.You dont have to address me in every sentence. Care to hazard a guess?This one lacks the information required to offer any worthwhile conjecture, as this is his first encounter with the Enemy.Teal Three is fairly eloquent as far as Death Corps Warriors go, which means its possible he, like Kuang Biao, used to be a Royal Guardian. Are you a Peak Expert? Teal Three nods, and I follow up with, If you dont mind sharing your age, Id be interested in hearing it.After a moments hesitation to register the choice before him, Teal Three responds, This one is forty-five years of age.Young as far as Peak Experts go, and the minor straightening of his back doesnt go unnoticed, showing he takes pride in his skills. Impressive. How is it youve never faced the Defiled before? I get the lack of incursions, but does the Eastern Province not have any outbreaks of local Defiled?Again, he hesitates, and I can see the struggle in his expression as his Oaths force him to toe the line. There are, but not many, as the Eastern province is small and the population densely packed together, making it difficult for Defiled tendencies to go unnoticed.Interesting. I didnt know the population was densely packed, which means there are probably more Easterners than I initially suspected. I was guessing in the low millions, but if theyre all packed together throughout the entire province, who knows how many there are over there? I first came into contact with the Defiled about nine years ago, though I didnt know it at the time....In the slave mines? Surprised by the interruption, I turn to Teal Three with a raised eyebrow, and he quickly falls to his knees, though his head is still raised and eyes fixed on the window to protect me from harm. This one begs Imperial Legate for forgiveness, or failing this, a swift death.No offence taken, I say, gesturing for him to stand. I was just surprised is all. Yes, from my time as a slave, in the Canston Trading Groups mines. I was just twelve and didnt know much of the world, so I didnt realize my captors were Defiled. They tormented me every day for their own, sick amusement, and encouraged the slaves to harass one another too. Every few days, theyd torture some poor soul to death while the rest of us watched, usually over the most minor infractions and sometimes for no reason at all. It was not a pleasant experience, but lately, I find myself reflecting on that time more and more....Why?Having lost myself in my thoughts once more, Teal Threes belated response takes me by surprise again. Because I still dont understand what their goal was. Why were we mining there? Not for any ore I recognize, nor were we equipped with the tools a proper stone quarry would require. Why did they feel the need to torment us, yet to take such care as to not cripple anyone? The illogical manner in which they chose their victims and the consistent number of deaths makes me wonder if they had a death quota to keep up, but why? It wasnt to turn any of us Defiled, else they wouldve encouraged deviant, violent behaviour or forced us to consume human flesh or something. No, they had a different purpose, one I still dont understand, and that bothers me, even more than the nightmares of torments past.Well, now I know they were trying to set up an Anathema factory or something, but thats not public knowledge yet and probably never will be. Still, It reeks too much of coincidence for one amber-eyed slave to survive and head off into the wilderness, just to find the only group of people within a hundred kilometres who cared enough to save him. Extraordinary coincidence or Divine intervention, its impossible to prove beyond a reasonable doubt, and if its the latter, then Id be furious at the Mother Above for dropping me off in the deep end without any warning. Thats not how you teach kids to swim, Lady. Give them some water wings and start them where they can stand or something.Realizing Ive fallen silent again, I find Teal Three still standing vigil beside me, and figure the poor guy could use a break. Closing the shutters, I shuffle over to the tea table and take a seat there instead, gesturing for my reluctant companion to take the chair across from me. The other Death Corps guards in the room stay at their posts, and I cant tell if theyre jealous or relieved at all the attention Teal Three is getting, but Im tired of monologuing to myself all the time, so I might as well keep talking out loud. Lately, Ive been wondering why I survived when so many others didnt. In truth, I should have died there, but through some... miracle of Heaven, I didnt, and it makes me want to believe I was saved for a purpose. Gesturing at the battlefield, I give a wry smile and add, Maybe even this purpose. Except... I dont know what I am supposed to do. How do we win this war?You command, Imperial Legate, Teal Three replies, offering me a seated salute. And the Death Corps will obey. These are the trials and tribulations laid out before us, and all we can do is persevere through them.Given that theyre Oath-sworn slaves compelled to do so, Teal Threes words shouldnt make me feel better, but something in his delivery buoys my spirits, a solemn, almost eager desire to follow my lead. Its not much, but its something, so I accept the gesture with a grateful nod before bidding him a silent farewell and shuffling back into my room to take my place at Yans side. Though she stirs in her sleep, she doesnt wake as I slip back under the covers, even snuggling in close until her forehead is resting against my cheek. Ping Ping likewise clambers back atop my chest while Aurie makes room for my feet to slide under him, and as Mama Bun flops back into the crook of my arm, I realize Ive been a fool for worrying so much. Ive done all I can, but I am not alone. I have family, friends, comrades, and soldiers to rely on, and I would be foolish not to. Its Imperial Army doctrine 101, no man is an island, and a lesson I would do well to not soon forget.Tomorrow, the heroes of the Empire will do battle against the Defiled on the open plains of Central, and for better or for worse, we will get through this trial and tribulation together.Chapter Meme
