Marlene Lainsfont barely had time to click her tongue before a crack filled the air.
She disappeared in a flash of blinding light, the scythe decapitating the air where she stood before it sharply cornered and returned to its owner.
Sitting up on my pile of crowns, I observed a scene of devastation beyond the treasury door. And none of it a result of the magical rune. As I searched for the flames and the smoke, I instead found a very large hole in the ground–as well as the diving scythe that'd caused it.
If any magical rune had activated, then it'd lost out against the force that was a clockwork doll with little regard for safety and an intense admiration for craters.
The sheer strength of her [Moonlit Divider] had broken the ground utterly.
Tiles and snow marked a clear boundary where everything within had burst outwards in a wide circle, leaving a ring of debris to fence the beaming maiden whose smile burned brighter than the gleam of her returning scythe.
She caught it effortlessly in one hand, swinging it around her back before resting the shaft against her shoulder.
“Wooooooooo! Did you see that? I'm amazing! That … That totally wasn't my first time throwing my scythe like that or anything!”
I shot to my feet.
I was appalled! A scythe was not a projectile weapon! Why, to throw it in my direction even to assist was a wholly unnecessary risk!
… Because if that scythe was broken, then it meant an extremely promising gardening instrument being lost!
In the moment I witnessed the scythe spinning as it cut through the air, I saw the future! A scythe was an instrument of farming. A tool to cut crops and prepare harvests. But what was to stop it from being utilised for trimming hedges and unkempt grass?
Indeed, if Coppelia could control the scythe with so much confidence that she was certain not a immaculate single hair of mine was at risk, then that meant another wonderful reason to keep her by my side!
If I could simply request Coppelia to sweep a meadow with a single toss, then the amount of time I could be saved from cutting with my sword was breathtaking!
“Coppelia! You've done excellently! I applaud your highly trained, if unorthodox use of your gardening scythe!”
“Thanks! … Although I've never gardened before!”
I immediately dismissed her words.
Experience could be taught. As well as tea making classes, etiquette training and cooking lessons, the road ahead of her was long and gruesome. But with enchanted limbs and unsurpassed physical dexterity, I was confident that the tutors would surrender to grief before she did!
Just as I thought that–the sound of a mage swiping away smoke from her cloak stole my attention.
Maria reappeared in the back of the treasury, her attire having suffered the brunt of successive teleportation spells. Magic was not without cost. Advanced magic even more so. And yet the damage to her outerwear paled in comparison to the creases scribbled on her face.
“I didn't even want it!” she said, patting her hips to indicate where something scandalously lacy resided. “But what was I supposed to do?! I can't even throw something like this away without it raising questions! Wearing it is the only way to guarantee it remains unseen!”
Her scythe in her hands, Coppelia suddenly paused, her frame locked in the motion of preparing to leap.
“Oh, I see,” she said, offering a look of pity.
Maria threw her arms up, the embers around her staff fizzling as whatever spell she'd planned was disrupted by a surge of indignation.
“What do you mean you see?! Why do you appear so consoling?!”
“I mean, when you say nobody's going to see the underwear you're wearing in that way, it does come across as a little bit depressing.”
The woman's mouth opened silently, too distraught by Coppelia's underhanded verbal attack to respond.
I opted to seize my opportunity at once.
“Coppelia, stay back! I will dispatch this menace to public decency!”
Raising Starlight Grace, I–
“Noooooooooope~”
Suddenly, my vision was blocked by a pair of hands covering my eyes.
Glancing behind, I found myself wildly disoriented by the sight of Coppelia's cheerful face taking up my view as she released her palms, despite only a moment ago being more than a dozen steps away.
She smiled as she leaned in, then playfully tapped me on the nose.
“I have one job, you know? I'd be a terrible assistant librarian if I let you take that away from me.”
I blinked, then offered her my finest raised brow.
“You have two jobs, actually. You're my future handmaiden. To poke my nose as anything else is treason.”
Coppelia swept past my shoulder, her smile turning from me to the mage.
“Nose poking is how we show affection in Ouzelia. The other is to offer generous repayment packages to ensure any library fee for titles past their return date is paid in a responsible and achievable manner. 35,087 gold crowns as an initial fine, followed by 15,476 gold crowns per day to a maximum accruement of 35 days is 576,747 gold crowns. Would you like to hear about our limited offer 10,000 year premium refinancing scheme?”
Marzipan brought her staff towards her chest, her lips pursed tightly together.
“How very generous,” she said, her chin raised as she believed, wrongly, that the topic of her underwear was finished. “Unfortunately, there's little incentive for me to agree to your fees. As the fine has a threshold which I've already long reached, I intend to make use of my borrow until I no longer require it any further. My apologies, but your reparations will need to wait.”
Coppelia's smile widened.
The mage tensed, clearly ready to counter a sudden attack.
Instead, Coppelia stood where she was, swaying sweetly, if not innocently, from left to right. The back of her fluffy golden hair shifted slightly, blown by a breeze summoned entirely by her displeasure.
No matter what expression she wore, I knew enough of my own future handmaiden to see when she was being quite serious.
Why, she was currently silent.
That was the biggest indicator of them all.
“Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.” Coppelia gave her giant scythe a casual twirl, as if to merely keep her hands occupied. “You're mistaken if you think that there's no punishment beyond the fine limit. Do you know what happens after 35 days?”
The woman glanced tellingly at the scythe.
“Allow me an educated guess. Decapitation with an instrument which has no right to be used as a weapon?”
“Ding! Correct! That's half a point!”
“Only half?”
“Mmh~ after all, the decapitation only comes at the very, very end. Until then, you need to make amends by helping out the library.”
Matilda broke out into laughter.
“Well, then, why didn't you say so? I would've been far more receptive to your attempts at locating me had I known that cleaning shelves and cataloguing ancient texts would be my punishment. What else would be expected of me? Shushing loud visitors?”
Coppelia raised her hand to her lips and giggled.
I nodded. A crude impersonation, perhaps, but crudeness had its own merits as well.
“I said you'd be helping out the library. Not in the library. Don't worry, there are plenty of jobs which need doing outside the front door. Decorating the garden as the newest petrified bust while you're awake for each passing season. Or swimming in the coin fountain as a goldfish while fleeing restlessly from Henry the crab. Which do you want?”
The mage flicked aside her cloak, opening a satchel by her waist.
“Let me think about it,” she said, plucking out a vial of bubbling green liquid. “Once I've mourned over your melted remains and teleported back to my belongings before they ride off without me, I vow to provide my answer to your replacement.”
Coppelia and I eyed the highly suspect vial.
Clearly an acid of some description. It churned and tossed like an ocean wave in a storm, its sickly green hue the colour of every vile toxin brewed by a witch and their cauldron since time immemorial.
“Step one–the melting,” said the alchemist, her nefarious smile a meagre 6.5/10 as she readied the vial for a throw. “And an overdue field experiment in the process.”
I raised Starlight Grace, even as Coppelia merely contented herself to watch. And no wonder. Both of us remembered how pitifully her last throw of a vial ended up. It was so anaemic that no woman of her gloating pride would even pretend it was an act.
Even if it was, neither me nor my [Spring Breeze] could allow such a grim concoction to come anywhere near bubbling distance of my boots.
Seeing how it licked and fought against the glass, I had no doubt that something like this could only be used for erasing the strongest stain. The handprints of nobility as they admired the cutlery of the Royal Villa.
I prepared myself to catch the vial to utilise for my own needs–only to be filled with dismay as she smashed it before her own feet.
“Ooooh, now that's something~” said Coppelia, her voice lit with curiosity as she made no attempt to stop the hellish landscape which greeted my nose.
A single moment of uncorked freedom was too much.
The odour was beyond compare. It was like a peasant's breakfast. A vile mix of gruel and poverty seasoned with sadness.
“... H-How dare you!” I called out, fingers pinching harder to obstruct the odour. “To enfeeble me with queasiness as your ultimate attack! Such a cowardly move has no place in even the most unchivalrous of dens!”
The alchemist merely smiled, her sense of smell clearly excess to requirements when it came to her profession.
Indeed, as the green spillage bubbled away on the floor before her, she took a step forwards, then brought the end of her staff down–
Glug. Glug. Glug.
Upon which the liquid began to seep into it.
A sight as bizarre as it was confounding.
Liquid was absorbed into the gnarled wood, the green sludge flowing through its faint grooves like veins, until all that remained was a trickle melting the floor to the sound of a bubbling sizzle.
“Huh,” said Coppelia, raising her scythe. “That's new.”
Maisie Lainsfont clearly agreed. She smiled, the overwhelming certainty of triumph washing over her face as she raised her staff.
… Just in time to face Coppelia, who'd leaped at her with such sudden turn of speed that even a startled deer in a forest would find itself outmatched.
“[Dragon's Breath].”
And then–
The staff poured forth an eruption of fire.
Whooooooooooooooooooooooooosh.
An immense spurt of unholy green flames shot out from the gnarled head, its ferocity visibly scorching the air as it shot directly towards its target.
Unable to dodge the coming flames, Coppelia did what Coppelia did.
She simply went through it instead.
“This is bad ideaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!”
And yet despite her words, an expression of undiluted joy lit up her face more than the alchemical flames did. She was a blur of moonlight, her scythe an indomitable crescent as she twirled, all the strength and elegance in her small frame effortlessly coming together to cleave into the flames.
Propelling herself through the air, Coppelia's zany smile and unmatched laughter outshone the faltering flames as they gave in before her dancing form.
“Ahahahahahahahahah–”
“[Dragon's Breath].”
And just like that–
Coppelia was sent hurtling into the ancient stone wall as the dying stream of flames became a sudden, powerful sprout.
Pwoomph!
Disappearing amidst a smog of black smoke and hissing steam, the strength of the lashing attack caused every crown in the treasury to jingle as the fair clockwork doll now found herself lodged deep into a freshly created hole.
My mouth opened in horror.
“H-How dare you use the same attack twice!” I called out to the mage. “That is … That is unseemly! The unwritten rules of fighting etiquette are very clear! Once your ability has been bested, you are not permitted to use it again! It is awkward, crude and clumsy!”
Mary smiled as she turned to me.
“All experiments require repetition to calculate the standard deviation of results. And I'm certain both of your charred corpses will make for excellent samples when determining how long my imbuing elixir can fuel my staff. But you're right. I suppose I'll have to remove all evidence of my impropriety. Fortunately, my elixir of dragon's breath is excellent for the task at hand.”
She aimed her staff towards me. I raised Starlight Grace in tandem.
All the while, that jet of green flame remained pinned in my vision even after the plumes of smoke had taken its place.
Why, to dip one's weapon in an elixir and have it simply breathe fire! It was absurdly unfair! Almost comical! There was no talent to that! No subtlety! It was … It was …
… It was amazing!
How much was she selling that vial for?!
With such an elixir, I could finally make Starlight Grace light up with flames! No, even more than that, I could have it emit flames!
So often, words were clearly insufficient in conveying my ire! No chastisement was fit as a response! When I saw that my roasted salmon meuniére wasn't cooked to specification, it wasn't with furious words I wanted to greet the tearful servants with! It was with flames which could both terrify and finish applying the correct sear!
“... The truth of the stars, revealed as dew beneath the first leaf. Luna Form, 2nd Stance. [Moonlit Flutter].”
Suddenly, Coppelia blinked into existence.
However, it wasn't to attack the circus performer, whose artless overuse of an otherwise impressive [Dragon's Breath] was purposefully held back until her reappearance.
Rather, it was to scoop me in her arms.
“–Hiieee?!”
“Here it is! One free explosion carry!”
Wearing a wide beam on her slightly singed face, Coppelia effortlessly lifted me in her arms even as she carried her scythe over her shoulder.
And then–
“[Dragon's Breath].”
She leapt again, carrying me with her as a torrent of green flames smashed into the ground where we'd both stood.
“–Hieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!”
Terror, confusion and elation did the rounds in my head as I was subjected to the sensation of moving at speeds far beyond my expectations.
Coppelia twirled and danced, leaping like a gazelle against a battering ram as the stream of green flames followed her lithe form. All the while, I tucked my face beside her neck, joy and nausea mixing as the number one aspiration of every princess, to be carried away from certain doom by a faithful retainer, was now being met to a backdrop of exploding coins and snow!
This … This is exactly what I wanted!
Except that in my dreams, the explosions eventually ceased!
In a testament to her alchemical skills, Mariana Lainsfont needed only to glance at the smoke rising from her staff before she renewed her outrageous mode of attack. And though her smile could barely be spied behind the roaring flame, the sparkle of entertainment in her brown eyes made her current feelings on the matter incredibly clear.
Indiscriminately pouring forth green fire, as it turned out, was very fun.
A problem.
Because wherever the alchemical flames went, it stayed. In moments, the treasury was utterly alight, all the snow having melted into steam and the coins now …
I gasped in unmatched horror.
The coins!
They were … They were melting!
“C-Coppelia! We must stop her! Now!”
“I want to! But she's seriously not stopping! It's actually really impressive! Do you think she can give me tips on how to make my poison berries more–”
Coppelia's query was cut short as she narrowly dodged the latest jet of flames by leaping off the side of the wall. One of the last surfaces not to be scorched.
Abandoning any plans to wait for the spewing alchemical fire to end, she leaped towards the only spot within the treasury which wasn't yet fully engulfed.
Namely, behind the frozen statue of Duke Valence.
Or rather, what remained of it.
That the Duke's last moments could be used in defence of the princess he'd foolishly tried betraying was an honour beyond him. Especially as he appeared as incapable of it as he was at paying taxes.
As Coppelia landed, an explosion of ice burst out as a solid bolt of green flame struck the Duke's figure–resulting in what was by far the more grisly sight of the day.
Half of the man's belly and face immediately vanished, and what remained would now serve as a meagre shield for us.
I allowed Coppelia to drop me, despite neither my safety nor satisfaction being met. She immediately started stamping out the little green flame at the heel of her shoe.
“Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot! Okay! New plan! You do your sword thing and I'll do my scythe thing! Neither of us have any sense of fair play! One of us will definitely get her!”
I nodded, Starlight Grace at the ready.
“True! Together, not even alchemical fire can stop our attacks! We must put an end to these dire flames at once!”
I peeked around the half-melted statue of the Duke as the latest attack paused. To my ire, the foe before me wore a proud smile as wisps of smoke emanated from the tip of the staff.
“Alchemical fire?” mused Miranda. “To view it as such is a gross disservice to the pains I went through to magically cultivate it. No, this is not alchemy. This is alchemy and magic. This is true dragon fire. So by all means, remain huddled behind that blundering fool. I will take as much joy in melting what remains of him as I will you. In the name of research, of course.”
Now my interest was truly stoked.
It was more than a name? Preposterous. To emit fire was one thing … but to legitimately threaten the fury of a dragon!
If … If I could use it to lay waste to the next castle I taxed, then the sight as it burns into the night would leave an impression far beyond merely seizing it!
“This … This cannot be dragon fire! And if it was, why, the cost would be … affordable or … ?”
“The cost is well worth your guaranteed demise! Know that dragons are the strongest creatures in this world, and my elixir of dragon's breath is no mere replica! My work was derived from the essence of a fallen green wyrm! Even in death, its fire cannot be bested by any means! … [Dragon's Breath]!”
To prove a point, she sent another jet of green flames into the Duke's face. Gone were any traces of the eyes locked in indignation as an explosion of ice burst outwards. Not even magical ice, it seems, could match against the fire of a dragon.
Coppelia rapidly blew at some of the green flames which lashed past us.
“Ehhh. So how do you wanna do this? That seriously is dragon fire. And I'm pretty sure this statue's going to melt before her staff does.”
“It's … It's fine! So long as she's melting the treasonous Duke, she's not melting the treasury!”
In answer, a fresh jet of the dragon fire burned what remained of the Duke's formerly large belly, indicating that it perhaps wasn't entirely fine.
Indeed, only the Winter Queen's power allowed any of the Duke's frozen figure to stay standing where even the stone had begun to melt. But whereas her fabled ice failed to nullify the last throes of a fallen dragon, the ruler of the Winter Court still possessed a brand of magic stronger than any frost.
The magic of undying loyalty.
Quack, quack. Quack, quack.
Indeed … we weren't the only ones to be sheltering behind the Duke's statue.
Looking down, I observed a duck whose presence was bizarrely invisible, still nibbling on the only copper crown in the entire treasury as it ignored the surrounding fires as easily as it did the acid arrows still stuck to its head.
I let out a smile.
And why not?
After all … I was a princess. And if there was something I could do better than anyone else, it was making full use of those with undying loyalty!
“I must say,” said the alchemist, her calm voice at odds with the flames spewing without end as it struck the rapidly melting statue before us. “I never expected being at the forefront of magical alchemy revolution to be so invigorating. Fieldwork was never an advertised part of either specialisation. Far too much mud and too little blood. But those who plant the seeds reap the harvest. And here I am, thoroughly enjoying the fruits of my labour.”
Ugh. A farming metaphor. That instantly made her meandering taunting a 3.5/10.
“Coppelia.”
“Yes?”
I pointed Starlight Grace at the duck, then began to swish.
“Do you recall the mailbox?”
“Sure!”
“And the fruit slimes?”
“Yup!”
“Well, now there's a duck.”
“Got it!~”
Coppelia leaned over and picked up the duck. It looked at her with a pair of luminous blue eyes, appearing as disinterested in her as it was in the flames dancing around us.
“Now?” she asked.
“Now,” I replied with a nod, Starlight Grace at the ready.
Coppelia smiled.
And then–she tossed the duck into the air.
It rose high above us, a holy beacon of white in a treasury flickering with green flames and dancing shadows. Rejecting its thin wings, this fluffy white duck soared as high as the ceiling, then descended like a cloud brought down from the sky.
The stream of fire ceased.
“... Is that a duck?” came a deeply uncertain voice.
Dragging my accumulated puff of wind around, I stepped to the side of the Duke's no longer rotund figure and pointed my sword ahead.
Not at the mage.
But at the duck as it fell to eye level.
“No,” I replied. “It's my roasted foie gras. And this is my [Spring Breeze].”
With a disinterested quack, the Winter Queen's snow duck shot forth at blistering speed towards the startled mage.
“[Dragon's Breath]!”
She reacted with a commendable lack of hesitation. Out shot a fresh spew of green flames. But against my [Spring Breeze], honed through more fieldwork than this self-proclaimed researcher had ever conducted in her life, only the heat from the flames could seek to stop whatever I sent her way.
Heat which failed to incinerate a duck under the direct service of the Winter Queen.
Forbidden to perish unless explicitly commanded to, the calm duck hurtled through the [Dragon's Breath]. And instead of combusting to the flames, it instead carried them–all the way back towards the mage.
Marlene's eyes widened in shock as a fiery cannonball hurtled towards her.
“W-What?!”
She stumbled as she twisted to one side, a yelp escaping her lips as the fiery duck caught her cloak. A scattering of green flames clawed against the fabric at once. But any consideration she had to give to her attire being on fire were pushed aside by the sight of the scythe swinging towards her instead.
“[Moonlit Sickle]!”
The young woman threw herself out of harm's way, relinquishing her staff instead of toiling to swing it with her.
A wise choice.
When the glimmering blade guillotined the staff in two, the front of her dress was caught by the sweeping crescent.
The fine gash left behind offered little to the imagination as to what would've happened had she chosen to remain for even a moment longer.
As the staff snapped in two, so too did whatever magic resided within it. A flashing burst of light was accompanied by a cascade of fiery embers, the light dying before the two halves of the staff dropped to the ground.
Marigold immediately clapped her hands together.
“[Force Re–] … ugh, no, I refuse! ... [Arcane Teleport]!”
Whatever spell the panicked mage had planned to cast, she instead made the unorthodox choice of risking a scythe as it swung towards her instead.
“Hmmmmmmmm~”
Coppelia's sweet voice filled the air like a death knell. Her eyes narrowed as she took in the woman. The blade that accompanied her sang as it swiped through the air.
The mage, unable to hurry her spell any faster, winced as the scythe swiftly approached–
And then, her naturally wide eyes opened as the scythe passed her by, swiping off a dozen strands of chestnut hair from her fringe as it struck the air by her side.
For a moment, the mage merely blinked. And then a range of emotions swept across her face.
Shock that the scythe had missed her. Elation that she would escape.
And then despair at the blade vanishing as it dug into the air beside her.
The space warped like the surface of a disturbed lake.
As the young woman's spell completed, the last thing she saw before her form vanished was the sight of a heavy tome being fished out, impaled by the tip of a scythe.
“No!” she cried. “I need–”
The sound of a cracking whip filled the air.
Then, the mage was gone, leaving only flames, an abrupt cry … and also a forbidden tome in her wake.
Before me, I watched as an assistant librarian lowered her scythe, her eyes examining the precious object she'd retrieved from whatever magical repository the mage had kept by her side.
And then she looked at me and beamed, raising two fingers in a bizarre V-sign.
“Tee-hee~”
Coppelia had finally gotten her book back.
Marlene Lainsfont barely had time to click her tongue before a crack filled the air.
She disappeared in a flash of blinding light, the scythe decapitating the air where she stood before it sharply cornered and returned to its owner.
Sitting up on my pile of crowns, I observed a scene of devastation beyond the treasury door. And none of it a result of the magical rune. As I searched for the flames and the smoke, I instead found a very large hole in the ground–as well as the diving scythe that'd caused it.
If any magical rune had activated, then it'd lost out against the force that was a clockwork doll with little regard for safety and an intense admiration for craters.
The sheer strength of her [Moonlit Divider] had broken the ground utterly.
Tiles and snow marked a clear boundary where everything within had burst outwards in a wide circle, leaving a ring of debris to fence the beaming maiden whose smile burned brighter than the gleam of her returning scythe.
She caught it effortlessly in one hand, swinging it around her back before resting the shaft against her shoulder.
“Wooooooooo! Did you see that? I'm amazing! That … That totally wasn't my first time throwing my scythe like that or anything!”
I shot to my feet.
I was appalled! A scythe was not a projectile weapon! Why, to throw it in my direction even to assist was a wholly unnecessary risk!
… Because if that scythe was broken, then it meant an extremely promising gardening instrument being lost!
In the moment I witnessed the scythe spinning as it cut through the air, I saw the future! A scythe was an instrument of farming. A tool to cut crops and prepare harvests. But what was to stop it from being utilised for trimming hedges and unkempt grass?
Indeed, if Coppelia could control the scythe with so much confidence that she was certain not a immaculate single hair of mine was at risk, then that meant another wonderful reason to keep her by my side!
If I could simply request Coppelia to sweep a meadow with a single toss, then the amount of time I could be saved from cutting with my sword was breathtaking!
“Coppelia! You've done excellently! I applaud your highly trained, if unorthodox use of your gardening scythe!”
“Thanks! … Although I've never gardened before!”
I immediately dismissed her words.
Experience could be taught. As well as tea making classes, etiquette training and cooking lessons, the road ahead of her was long and gruesome. But with enchanted limbs and unsurpassed physical dexterity, I was confident that the tutors would surrender to grief before she did!
Just as I thought that–the sound of a mage swiping away smoke from her cloak stole my attention.
Maria reappeared in the back of the treasury, her attire having suffered the brunt of successive teleportation spells. Magic was not without cost. Advanced magic even more so. And yet the damage to her outerwear paled in comparison to the creases scribbled on her face.
“I didn't even want it!” she said, patting her hips to indicate where something scandalously lacy resided. “But what was I supposed to do?! I can't even throw something like this away without it raising questions! Wearing it is the only way to guarantee it remains unseen!”
Her scythe in her hands, Coppelia suddenly paused, her frame locked in the motion of preparing to leap.
“Oh, I see,” she said, offering a look of pity.
Maria threw her arms up, the embers around her staff fizzling as whatever spell she'd planned was disrupted by a surge of indignation.
“What do you mean you see?! Why do you appear so consoling?!”
“I mean, when you say nobody's going to see the underwear you're wearing in that way, it does come across as a little bit depressing.”
The woman's mouth opened silently, too distraught by Coppelia's underhanded verbal attack to respond.
I opted to seize my opportunity at once.
“Coppelia, stay back! I will dispatch this menace to public decency!”
Raising Starlight Grace, I–
“Noooooooooope~”
Suddenly, my vision was blocked by a pair of hands covering my eyes.
Glancing behind, I found myself wildly disoriented by the sight of Coppelia's cheerful face taking up my view as she released her palms, despite only a moment ago being more than a dozen steps away.
She smiled as she leaned in, then playfully tapped me on the nose.
“I have one job, you know? I'd be a terrible assistant librarian if I let you take that away from me.”
I blinked, then offered her my finest raised brow.
“You have two jobs, actually. You're my future handmaiden. To poke my nose as anything else is treason.”
Coppelia swept past my shoulder, her smile turning from me to the mage.
“Nose poking is how we show affection in Ouzelia. The other is to offer generous repayment packages to ensure any library fee for titles past their return date is paid in a responsible and achievable manner. 35,087 gold crowns as an initial fine, followed by 15,476 gold crowns per day to a maximum accruement of 35 days is 576,747 gold crowns. Would you like to hear about our limited offer 10,000 year premium refinancing scheme?”
Marzipan brought her staff towards her chest, her lips pursed tightly together.
“How very generous,” she said, her chin raised as she believed, wrongly, that the topic of her underwear was finished. “Unfortunately, there's little incentive for me to agree to your fees. As the fine has a threshold which I've already long reached, I intend to make use of my borrow until I no longer require it any further. My apologies, but your reparations will need to wait.”
Coppelia's smile widened.
The mage tensed, clearly ready to counter a sudden attack.
Instead, Coppelia stood where she was, swaying sweetly, if not innocently, from left to right. The back of her fluffy golden hair shifted slightly, blown by a breeze summoned entirely by her displeasure.
No matter what expression she wore, I knew enough of my own future handmaiden to see when she was being quite serious.
Why, she was currently silent.
That was the biggest indicator of them all.
“Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.” Coppelia gave her giant scythe a casual twirl, as if to merely keep her hands occupied. “You're mistaken if you think that there's no punishment beyond the fine limit. Do you know what happens after 35 days?”
The woman glanced tellingly at the scythe.
“Allow me an educated guess. Decapitation with an instrument which has no right to be used as a weapon?”
“Ding! Correct! That's half a point!”
“Only half?”
“Mmh~ after all, the decapitation only comes at the very, very end. Until then, you need to make amends by helping out the library.”
Matilda broke out into laughter.
“Well, then, why didn't you say so? I would've been far more receptive to your attempts at locating me had I known that cleaning shelves and cataloguing ancient texts would be my punishment. What else would be expected of me? Shushing loud visitors?”
Coppelia raised her hand to her lips and giggled.
I nodded. A crude impersonation, perhaps, but crudeness had its own merits as well.
“I said you'd be helping out the library. Not in the library. Don't worry, there are plenty of jobs which need doing outside the front door. Decorating the garden as the newest petrified bust while you're awake for each passing season. Or swimming in the coin fountain as a goldfish while fleeing restlessly from Henry the crab. Which do you want?”
The mage flicked aside her cloak, opening a satchel by her waist.
“Let me think about it,” she said, plucking out a vial of bubbling green liquid. “Once I've mourned over your melted remains and teleported back to my belongings before they ride off without me, I vow to provide my answer to your replacement.”
Coppelia and I eyed the highly suspect vial.
Clearly an acid of some description. It churned and tossed like an ocean wave in a storm, its sickly green hue the colour of every vile toxin brewed by a witch and their cauldron since time immemorial.
“Step one–the melting,” said the alchemist, her nefarious smile a meagre 6.5/10 as she readied the vial for a throw. “And an overdue field experiment in the process.”
I raised Starlight Grace, even as Coppelia merely contented herself to watch. And no wonder. Both of us remembered how pitifully her last throw of a vial ended up. It was so anaemic that no woman of her gloating pride would even pretend it was an act.
Even if it was, neither me nor my [Spring Breeze] could allow such a grim concoction to come anywhere near bubbling distance of my boots.
Seeing how it licked and fought against the glass, I had no doubt that something like this could only be used for erasing the strongest stain. The handprints of nobility as they admired the cutlery of the Royal Villa.
I prepared myself to catch the vial to utilise for my own needs–only to be filled with dismay as she smashed it before her own feet.
“Ooooh, now that's something~” said Coppelia, her voice lit with curiosity as she made no attempt to stop the hellish landscape which greeted my nose.
A single moment of uncorked freedom was too much.
The odour was beyond compare. It was like a peasant's breakfast. A vile mix of gruel and poverty seasoned with sadness.
“... H-How dare you!” I called out, fingers pinching harder to obstruct the odour. “To enfeeble me with queasiness as your ultimate attack! Such a cowardly move has no place in even the most unchivalrous of dens!”
The alchemist merely smiled, her sense of smell clearly excess to requirements when it came to her profession.
Indeed, as the green spillage bubbled away on the floor before her, she took a step forwards, then brought the end of her staff down–
Glug. Glug. Glug.
Upon which the liquid began to seep into it.
A sight as bizarre as it was confounding.
Liquid was absorbed into the gnarled wood, the green sludge flowing through its faint grooves like veins, until all that remained was a trickle melting the floor to the sound of a bubbling sizzle.
“Huh,” said Coppelia, raising her scythe. “That's new.”
Maisie Lainsfont clearly agreed. She smiled, the overwhelming certainty of triumph washing over her face as she raised her staff.
… Just in time to face Coppelia, who'd leaped at her with such sudden turn of speed that even a startled deer in a forest would find itself outmatched.
“[Dragon's Breath].”
And then–
The staff poured forth an eruption of fire.
Whooooooooooooooooooooooooosh.
An immense spurt of unholy green flames shot out from the gnarled head, its ferocity visibly scorching the air as it shot directly towards its target.
Unable to dodge the coming flames, Coppelia did what Coppelia did.
She simply went through it instead.
“This is bad ideaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!”
And yet despite her words, an expression of undiluted joy lit up her face more than the alchemical flames did. She was a blur of moonlight, her scythe an indomitable crescent as she twirled, all the strength and elegance in her small frame effortlessly coming together to cleave into the flames.
Propelling herself through the air, Coppelia's zany smile and unmatched laughter outshone the faltering flames as they gave in before her dancing form.
“Ahahahahahahahahah–”
“[Dragon's Breath].”
And just like that–
Coppelia was sent hurtling into the ancient stone wall as the dying stream of flames became a sudden, powerful sprout.
Pwoomph!
Disappearing amidst a smog of black smoke and hissing steam, the strength of the lashing attack caused every crown in the treasury to jingle as the fair clockwork doll now found herself lodged deep into a freshly created hole.
My mouth opened in horror.
“H-How dare you use the same attack twice!” I called out to the mage. “That is … That is unseemly! The unwritten rules of fighting etiquette are very clear! Once your ability has been bested, you are not permitted to use it again! It is awkward, crude and clumsy!”
Mary smiled as she turned to me.
“All experiments require repetition to calculate the standard deviation of results. And I'm certain both of your charred corpses will make for excellent samples when determining how long my imbuing elixir can fuel my staff. But you're right. I suppose I'll have to remove all evidence of my impropriety. Fortunately, my elixir of dragon's breath is excellent for the task at hand.”
She aimed her staff towards me. I raised Starlight Grace in tandem.
All the while, that jet of green flame remained pinned in my vision even after the plumes of smoke had taken its place.
Why, to dip one's weapon in an elixir and have it simply breathe fire! It was absurdly unfair! Almost comical! There was no talent to that! No subtlety! It was … It was …
… It was amazing!
How much was she selling that vial for?!
With such an elixir, I could finally make Starlight Grace light up with flames! No, even more than that, I could have it emit flames!
So often, words were clearly insufficient in conveying my ire! No chastisement was fit as a response! When I saw that my roasted salmon meuniére wasn't cooked to specification, it wasn't with furious words I wanted to greet the tearful servants with! It was with flames which could both terrify and finish applying the correct sear!
“... The truth of the stars, revealed as dew beneath the first leaf. Luna Form, 2nd Stance. [Moonlit Flutter].”
Suddenly, Coppelia blinked into existence.
However, it wasn't to attack the circus performer, whose artless overuse of an otherwise impressive [Dragon's Breath] was purposefully held back until her reappearance.
Rather, it was to scoop me in her arms.
“–Hiieee?!”
“Here it is! One free explosion carry!”
Wearing a wide beam on her slightly singed face, Coppelia effortlessly lifted me in her arms even as she carried her scythe over her shoulder.
And then–
“[Dragon's Breath].”
She leapt again, carrying me with her as a torrent of green flames smashed into the ground where we'd both stood.
“–Hieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!”
Terror, confusion and elation did the rounds in my head as I was subjected to the sensation of moving at speeds far beyond my expectations.
Coppelia twirled and danced, leaping like a gazelle against a battering ram as the stream of green flames followed her lithe form. All the while, I tucked my face beside her neck, joy and nausea mixing as the number one aspiration of every princess, to be carried away from certain doom by a faithful retainer, was now being met to a backdrop of exploding coins and snow!
This … This is exactly what I wanted!
Except that in my dreams, the explosions eventually ceased!
In a testament to her alchemical skills, Mariana Lainsfont needed only to glance at the smoke rising from her staff before she renewed her outrageous mode of attack. And though her smile could barely be spied behind the roaring flame, the sparkle of entertainment in her brown eyes made her current feelings on the matter incredibly clear.
Indiscriminately pouring forth green fire, as it turned out, was very fun.
A problem.
Because wherever the alchemical flames went, it stayed. In moments, the treasury was utterly alight, all the snow having melted into steam and the coins now …
I gasped in unmatched horror.
The coins!
They were … They were melting!
“C-Coppelia! We must stop her! Now!”
“I want to! But she's seriously not stopping! It's actually really impressive! Do you think she can give me tips on how to make my poison berries more–”
Coppelia's query was cut short as she narrowly dodged the latest jet of flames by leaping off the side of the wall. One of the last surfaces not to be scorched.
Abandoning any plans to wait for the spewing alchemical fire to end, she leaped towards the only spot within the treasury which wasn't yet fully engulfed.
Namely, behind the frozen statue of Duke Valence.
Or rather, what remained of it.
That the Duke's last moments could be used in defence of the princess he'd foolishly tried betraying was an honour beyond him. Especially as he appeared as incapable of it as he was at paying taxes.
As Coppelia landed, an explosion of ice burst out as a solid bolt of green flame struck the Duke's figure–resulting in what was by far the more grisly sight of the day.
Half of the man's belly and face immediately vanished, and what remained would now serve as a meagre shield for us.
I allowed Coppelia to drop me, despite neither my safety nor satisfaction being met. She immediately started stamping out the little green flame at the heel of her shoe.
“Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot! Okay! New plan! You do your sword thing and I'll do my scythe thing! Neither of us have any sense of fair play! One of us will definitely get her!”
I nodded, Starlight Grace at the ready.
“True! Together, not even alchemical fire can stop our attacks! We must put an end to these dire flames at once!”
I peeked around the half-melted statue of the Duke as the latest attack paused. To my ire, the foe before me wore a proud smile as wisps of smoke emanated from the tip of the staff.
“Alchemical fire?” mused Miranda. “To view it as such is a gross disservice to the pains I went through to magically cultivate it. No, this is not alchemy. This is alchemy and magic. This is true dragon fire. So by all means, remain huddled behind that blundering fool. I will take as much joy in melting what remains of him as I will you. In the name of research, of course.”
Now my interest was truly stoked.
It was more than a name? Preposterous. To emit fire was one thing … but to legitimately threaten the fury of a dragon!
If … If I could use it to lay waste to the next castle I taxed, then the sight as it burns into the night would leave an impression far beyond merely seizing it!
“This … This cannot be dragon fire! And if it was, why, the cost would be … affordable or … ?”
“The cost is well worth your guaranteed demise! Know that dragons are the strongest creatures in this world, and my elixir of dragon's breath is no mere replica! My work was derived from the essence of a fallen green wyrm! Even in death, its fire cannot be bested by any means! … [Dragon's Breath]!”
To prove a point, she sent another jet of green flames into the Duke's face. Gone were any traces of the eyes locked in indignation as an explosion of ice burst outwards. Not even magical ice, it seems, could match against the fire of a dragon.
Coppelia rapidly blew at some of the green flames which lashed past us.
“Ehhh. So how do you wanna do this? That seriously is dragon fire. And I'm pretty sure this statue's going to melt before her staff does.”
“It's … It's fine! So long as she's melting the treasonous Duke, she's not melting the treasury!”
In answer, a fresh jet of the dragon fire burned what remained of the Duke's formerly large belly, indicating that it perhaps wasn't entirely fine.
Indeed, only the Winter Queen's power allowed any of the Duke's frozen figure to stay standing where even the stone had begun to melt. But whereas her fabled ice failed to nullify the last throes of a fallen dragon, the ruler of the Winter Court still possessed a brand of magic stronger than any frost.
The magic of undying loyalty.
Quack, quack. Quack, quack.
Indeed … we weren't the only ones to be sheltering behind the Duke's statue.
Looking down, I observed a duck whose presence was bizarrely invisible, still nibbling on the only copper crown in the entire treasury as it ignored the surrounding fires as easily as it did the acid arrows still stuck to its head.
I let out a smile.
And why not?
After all … I was a princess. And if there was something I could do better than anyone else, it was making full use of those with undying loyalty!
“I must say,” said the alchemist, her calm voice at odds with the flames spewing without end as it struck the rapidly melting statue before us. “I never expected being at the forefront of magical alchemy revolution to be so invigorating. Fieldwork was never an advertised part of either specialisation. Far too much mud and too little blood. But those who plant the seeds reap the harvest. And here I am, thoroughly enjoying the fruits of my labour.”
Ugh. A farming metaphor. That instantly made her meandering taunting a 3.5/10.
“Coppelia.”
“Yes?”
I pointed Starlight Grace at the duck, then began to swish.
“Do you recall the mailbox?”
“Sure!”
“And the fruit slimes?”
“Yup!”
“Well, now there's a duck.”
“Got it!~”
Coppelia leaned over and picked up the duck. It looked at her with a pair of luminous blue eyes, appearing as disinterested in her as it was in the flames dancing around us.
“Now?” she asked.
“Now,” I replied with a nod, Starlight Grace at the ready.
Coppelia smiled.
And then–she tossed the duck into the air.
It rose high above us, a holy beacon of white in a treasury flickering with green flames and dancing shadows. Rejecting its thin wings, this fluffy white duck soared as high as the ceiling, then descended like a cloud brought down from the sky.
The stream of fire ceased.
“... Is that a duck?” came a deeply uncertain voice.
Dragging my accumulated puff of wind around, I stepped to the side of the Duke's no longer rotund figure and pointed my sword ahead.
Not at the mage.
But at the duck as it fell to eye level.
“No,” I replied. “It's my roasted foie gras. And this is my [Spring Breeze].”
With a disinterested quack, the Winter Queen's snow duck shot forth at blistering speed towards the startled mage.
“[Dragon's Breath]!”
She reacted with a commendable lack of hesitation. Out shot a fresh spew of green flames. But against my [Spring Breeze], honed through more fieldwork than this self-proclaimed researcher had ever conducted in her life, only the heat from the flames could seek to stop whatever I sent her way.
Heat which failed to incinerate a duck under the direct service of the Winter Queen.
Forbidden to perish unless explicitly commanded to, the calm duck hurtled through the [Dragon's Breath]. And instead of combusting to the flames, it instead carried them–all the way back towards the mage.
Marlene's eyes widened in shock as a fiery cannonball hurtled towards her.
“W-What?!”
She stumbled as she twisted to one side, a yelp escaping her lips as the fiery duck caught her cloak. A scattering of green flames clawed against the fabric at once. But any consideration she had to give to her attire being on fire were pushed aside by the sight of the scythe swinging towards her instead.
“[Moonlit Sickle]!”
The young woman threw herself out of harm's way, relinquishing her staff instead of toiling to swing it with her.
A wise choice.
When the glimmering blade guillotined the staff in two, the front of her dress was caught by the sweeping crescent.
The fine gash left behind offered little to the imagination as to what would've happened had she chosen to remain for even a moment longer.
As the staff snapped in two, so too did whatever magic resided within it. A flashing burst of light was accompanied by a cascade of fiery embers, the light dying before the two halves of the staff dropped to the ground.
Marigold immediately clapped her hands together.
“[Force Re–] … ugh, no, I refuse! ... [Arcane Teleport]!”
Whatever spell the panicked mage had planned to cast, she instead made the unorthodox choice of risking a scythe as it swung towards her instead.
“Hmmmmmmmm~”
Coppelia's sweet voice filled the air like a death knell. Her eyes narrowed as she took in the woman. The blade that accompanied her sang as it swiped through the air.
The mage, unable to hurry her spell any faster, winced as the scythe swiftly approached–
And then, her naturally wide eyes opened as the scythe passed her by, swiping off a dozen strands of chestnut hair from her fringe as it struck the air by her side.
For a moment, the mage merely blinked. And then a range of emotions swept across her face.
Shock that the scythe had missed her. Elation that she would escape.
And then despair at the blade vanishing as it dug into the air beside her.
The space warped like the surface of a disturbed lake.
As the young woman's spell completed, the last thing she saw before her form vanished was the sight of a heavy tome being fished out, impaled by the tip of a scythe.
“No!” she cried. “I need–”
The sound of a cracking whip filled the air.
Then, the mage was gone, leaving only flames, an abrupt cry … and also a forbidden tome in her wake.
Before me, I watched as an assistant librarian lowered her scythe, her eyes examining the precious object she'd retrieved from whatever magical repository the mage had kept by her side.
And then she looked at me and beamed, raising two fingers in a bizarre V-sign.
“Tee-hee~”
Coppelia had finally gotten her book back.
