Slow or whatever, Cadel wanted to faint. Beneath him, Garuel showed no sign of backing down, and his gaze grew deeper and deeper. He felt like he was suffocating.
‘If I hit him and run away…….’
In Cadel’s imagination, he pushed Garuel away with all his might several times. He attacked and even threatened Garuel with magic. But he couldn’t execute it in the end because Garuel was the knight Cadel needed to recruit.
If he couldn’t bear it this one time and rejected Garuel, his relationship with him could become unreasonably distant. Cadel was afraid of that.
He didn’t want to risk his subordinates’ lives again. Nor did he want to continue to fight a life-threatening battle. Cadel needed Garuel with his healing abilities. If he lost Garuel, they would have to risk their lives on the battlefield again with no insurance.
That was why Cadel thought that pushing Garuel away might be selfish pride. He was afraid he’d make it hard for everyone because he couldn’t stand anything he didn’t like. The hand holding Garuel’s shoulder kept losing strength.
“……You’re about to cry.”
A low, hushed voice tickled his ear. Garuel ruffled Cadel’s hair affectionately and locked eyes with him.
Garuel couldn’t believe Cadel was making this face when he couldn’t push Garuel properly. It was tempting to believe it was just a ploy to make Garuel feel bad for himself.
“You don’t like me that much?”
“…….”
“Or is it your first time?”
Eyes trembling precariously, Cadel lowered his gaze, evading an answer. Garuel lowered his hand from running through Cadel’s hair and cupped his ear. He brushed against the smooth auricle, and tickled the tender earlobe.
Cadel, craning his neck to escape the blatant touch, said in a hushing voice.
“If I say it’s my first time, will you stop……?”
“No, I think that would be difficult. This is an opportunity to quickly take the lead over so many competitors. And I tend not to miss a given opportunity.”
Cadel was left speechless by Garuel’s shameless demeanor. The look on his face clearly showed absurdity. Garuel didn’t bother to stifle his laughter. He laughed merrily, taking in the sight of the defenseless Cadel on the bed beneath him.
“I’m pretty confident in my night skills. I could make you feel better.”
“I don’t want to know.”
“I want to make you feel good.”
Garuel could see Cadel’s ears and the nape of his neck turning red from his crude jokes, and it was a nice sight, too. Garuel felt like a demon trying to prey on a chaste clergyman. While in fact, the one being the clergyman was Garuel himself.
If he was to look at the long-term relationship with Cadel, it was right to end it here. He didn’t like the idea of forcing himself on someone against the idea, and even if Cadel found a night with him satisfying, he would eventually avoid Garuel.
‘It’s dangerous enough as it is.’
Even though Garuel knew he had to stop, he kept pushing himself mischievously. There was a chance Cadel would turn away and say he would never interact with him again.
Even though he was worried about this and that, he couldn’t let Cadel go. The sound of his breathing, the hesitant look on his face, the warmth of his body. It all became a sweet trap that would not let Garuel go.
To get away from Cadel, he would have to open the sharp bear trap himself and twist his mangled ankle out. It was the last thing he wanted to do.
As if he had sensed Garuel’s intentions, Cadel, whose existence was like a bear trap, decided to move on his own.
“What are you doin…….”
The hand that was holding Garuel’s shoulder pitifully turned towards his face. To be exact, the eye patch covering his left eye.
With a reflexive bite, Garuel caught the hand that reached for his eye patch. Then Cadel looked up, his fear gone, his eyes determined.
“Take that off.”
“Any reason to do so?”
“Are you telling me to only look at your one eye the entire time, Sir? No, I do not want to. So take it off.”
“……If I take it off, will you think about sleeping with me?”
Cadel’s answer to that unexpected question was unexpected.
“Sure. I’ve been depressed lately, so why not cheer me up?”
All this time, he’d been enjoying himself, playing with Cadel’s mind, but now Garuel couldn’t quite muster the right expression. His slightly hardened gaze met Cadel’s grasping hand, and he took in Cadel’s disheveled face again.
“……It’s ugly. It’s a turn-off to look at.”
“For a person like you, a scar is your personality. Rather, I think it would be nice to feel a sense of humanity in you.”
“It bothers me.”
“So what should we do?”
Gone was the shyness of a moment ago, and the look on his face as he looked up at Garuel was one of triumph. Cadel tilted his head at an angle on the bed, his eyes darting about like a fox.
“Take it off if you want to, get up if you don’t.”
* * *
“I thought you would run away right away if I let you go.”
Leaning against the head of the bed, Garuel saw Cadel’s back to the table. Fumbling for something on the table, Cadel replied in a low voice.
“You said you wanted a night with me. Since the night has not yet passed, I plan to stay with you until you say otherwise.”
Turning, Cadel held two unopened flasks in his hand. He tossed one lightly onto the bed, and Garuel snatched it up in one swift motion.
Cadel sat down on the edge of the bed, ignoring Garuel, who was looking back and forth between him and the flask with interest.
“Still, I trust that you won’t do the same thing as before.”
“You said you’d sleep with me if I took off my eye patch.”
“You’re not going to take it off.”
Garuel raised his eyebrows at the confident reply. He couldn’t refute it. He uncorked the flask and stared at the profile of Cadel, who was drinking from the flask just like him.
His expression seemed more relaxed now that he was out of danger. When Cadel felt his gaze and turned his head, Garuel put the flask he was holding down on the bed.
“It’s really weird.”
“What is weird?”
“It was weird from the first time I saw it.”
“So what do—”
Garuel patted his own eye patch. His gaze toward Cadel was much drier than it had been the first time, much sharper.
“You always act like you know. What’s in here.”
“……It’s because I know.”
“You know?”
“Because usually, humans have their eyes in that position. Don’t you have one too?”
Cadel replied nonchalantly and looked away. He was trying to look nonchalant, but in fact, he was the exact opposite of nonchalant.
‘Is this a crisis or an opportunity?’
In order to get out of bed with Garuel smoothly, Cadel played on his weaknesses, and while he was able to avoid any major consequences, it seemed to make Garuel quite uncomfortable, as his sensitivities were irritated.
‘In any case, if I want to recruit Garuel, I must mention the evil eye. Only by accepting that power will Garuel be able to fulfill the role of a healer in the Knight Order.’
However, Cadel thought that if he was lucky, it would be right before recruiting Garuel into the Knight Order. He would turn Garuel’s mind as favorably as possible, then carefully approach this sensitive subject.
Cadel didn’t expect Garuel to be the first to suspect and bait him, at least not at a time like this.
‘……I have no idea.’
Cadel wasn’t sure if he should take the opportunity now that Garuel had opened that door first, or if he should play dumb and wait for a time when things had calmed down.
And Garuel had no intention of letting Cadel get lost in his thoughts.
“This is disappointing. I thought we were getting pretty close.”
“That’s how I feel too.”
“Then why do you lie? If you’re close to someone, don’t lie to them, at least not in front of them.”
Garuel shifted his body in a light motion, turning Cadel’s shoulders back to face him, then pressed his hands to the straps of his eye patch.
“I’ll show you, so you can be truly surprised. If you truly know nothing, you will see things you never imagined. I heard you have a talent for acting, right?”
“……Sir Garuel.”
“I’ll give you permission to run away.”
Garel’s voice was strangely intense as he roughly untied the straps of the eye patch, and the cloth that covered his eyes slid down.
But before the cloth could fall completely, Cadel hurried to catch it. Pulling the loose cloth back into place, Cadel pressed it against his palm, covering Garuel’s eyes.
Cold, purple eye reflected the panic on Cadel’s face.
“……Since when? Since when did you know?”
“…….”
“How did you know? No, before that…….”
Garuel grabbed Cadel’s wrist, which covered his left eye, and yanked it away.
“Why did you stay next to me even though you knew everything?”
The helpless eye patch crashed down, sweeping across Garuel’s nose and cheek. Cadel stared into his bare, unobscured, jet-black eye. The shame of Garuel that lay deeper than any other scar. Cadel had no choice but to stare.
Slow or whatever, Cadel wanted to faint. Beneath him, Garuel showed no sign of backing down, and his gaze grew deeper and deeper. He felt like he was suffocating.
‘If I hit him and run away…….’
In Cadel’s imagination, he pushed Garuel away with all his might several times. He attacked and even threatened Garuel with magic. But he couldn’t execute it in the end because Garuel was the knight Cadel needed to recruit.
If he couldn’t bear it this one time and rejected Garuel, his relationship with him could become unreasonably distant. Cadel was afraid of that.
He didn’t want to risk his subordinates’ lives again. Nor did he want to continue to fight a life-threatening battle. Cadel needed Garuel with his healing abilities. If he lost Garuel, they would have to risk their lives on the battlefield again with no insurance.
That was why Cadel thought that pushing Garuel away might be selfish pride. He was afraid he’d make it hard for everyone because he couldn’t stand anything he didn’t like. The hand holding Garuel’s shoulder kept losing strength.
“……You’re about to cry.”
A low, hushed voice tickled his ear. Garuel ruffled Cadel’s hair affectionately and locked eyes with him.
Garuel couldn’t believe Cadel was making this face when he couldn’t push Garuel properly. It was tempting to believe it was just a ploy to make Garuel feel bad for himself.
“You don’t like me that much?”
“…….”
“Or is it your first time?”
Eyes trembling precariously, Cadel lowered his gaze, evading an answer. Garuel lowered his hand from running through Cadel’s hair and cupped his ear. He brushed against the smooth auricle, and tickled the tender earlobe.
Cadel, craning his neck to escape the blatant touch, said in a hushing voice.
“If I say it’s my first time, will you stop……?”
“No, I think that would be difficult. This is an opportunity to quickly take the lead over so many competitors. And I tend not to miss a given opportunity.”
Cadel was left speechless by Garuel’s shameless demeanor. The look on his face clearly showed absurdity. Garuel didn’t bother to stifle his laughter. He laughed merrily, taking in the sight of the defenseless Cadel on the bed beneath him.
“I’m pretty confident in my night skills. I could make you feel better.”
“I don’t want to know.”
“I want to make you feel good.”
Garuel could see Cadel’s ears and the nape of his neck turning red from his crude jokes, and it was a nice sight, too. Garuel felt like a demon trying to prey on a chaste clergyman. While in fact, the one being the clergyman was Garuel himself.
If he was to look at the long-term relationship with Cadel, it was right to end it here. He didn’t like the idea of forcing himself on someone against the idea, and even if Cadel found a night with him satisfying, he would eventually avoid Garuel.
‘It’s dangerous enough as it is.’
Even though Garuel knew he had to stop, he kept pushing himself mischievously. There was a chance Cadel would turn away and say he would never interact with him again.
Even though he was worried about this and that, he couldn’t let Cadel go. The sound of his breathing, the hesitant look on his face, the warmth of his body. It all became a sweet trap that would not let Garuel go.
To get away from Cadel, he would have to open the sharp bear trap himself and twist his mangled ankle out. It was the last thing he wanted to do.
As if he had sensed Garuel’s intentions, Cadel, whose existence was like a bear trap, decided to move on his own.
“What are you doin…….”
The hand that was holding Garuel’s shoulder pitifully turned towards his face. To be exact, the eye patch covering his left eye.
With a reflexive bite, Garuel caught the hand that reached for his eye patch. Then Cadel looked up, his fear gone, his eyes determined.
“Take that off.”
“Any reason to do so?”
“Are you telling me to only look at your one eye the entire time, Sir? No, I do not want to. So take it off.”
“……If I take it off, will you think about sleeping with me?”
Cadel’s answer to that unexpected question was unexpected.
“Sure. I’ve been depressed lately, so why not cheer me up?”
All this time, he’d been enjoying himself, playing with Cadel’s mind, but now Garuel couldn’t quite muster the right expression. His slightly hardened gaze met Cadel’s grasping hand, and he took in Cadel’s disheveled face again.
“……It’s ugly. It’s a turn-off to look at.”
“For a person like you, a scar is your personality. Rather, I think it would be nice to feel a sense of humanity in you.”
“It bothers me.”
“So what should we do?”
Gone was the shyness of a moment ago, and the look on his face as he looked up at Garuel was one of triumph. Cadel tilted his head at an angle on the bed, his eyes darting about like a fox.
“Take it off if you want to, get up if you don’t.”
* * *
“I thought you would run away right away if I let you go.”
Leaning against the head of the bed, Garuel saw Cadel’s back to the table. Fumbling for something on the table, Cadel replied in a low voice.
“You said you wanted a night with me. Since the night has not yet passed, I plan to stay with you until you say otherwise.”
Turning, Cadel held two unopened flasks in his hand. He tossed one lightly onto the bed, and Garuel snatched it up in one swift motion.
Cadel sat down on the edge of the bed, ignoring Garuel, who was looking back and forth between him and the flask with interest.
“Still, I trust that you won’t do the same thing as before.”
“You said you’d sleep with me if I took off my eye patch.”
“You’re not going to take it off.”
Garuel raised his eyebrows at the confident reply. He couldn’t refute it. He uncorked the flask and stared at the profile of Cadel, who was drinking from the flask just like him.
His expression seemed more relaxed now that he was out of danger. When Cadel felt his gaze and turned his head, Garuel put the flask he was holding down on the bed.
“It’s really weird.”
“What is weird?”
“It was weird from the first time I saw it.”
“So what do—”
Garuel patted his own eye patch. His gaze toward Cadel was much drier than it had been the first time, much sharper.
“You always act like you know. What’s in here.”
“……It’s because I know.”
“You know?”
“Because usually, humans have their eyes in that position. Don’t you have one too?”
Cadel replied nonchalantly and looked away. He was trying to look nonchalant, but in fact, he was the exact opposite of nonchalant.
‘Is this a crisis or an opportunity?’
In order to get out of bed with Garuel smoothly, Cadel played on his weaknesses, and while he was able to avoid any major consequences, it seemed to make Garuel quite uncomfortable, as his sensitivities were irritated.
‘In any case, if I want to recruit Garuel, I must mention the evil eye. Only by accepting that power will Garuel be able to fulfill the role of a healer in the Knight Order.’
However, Cadel thought that if he was lucky, it would be right before recruiting Garuel into the Knight Order. He would turn Garuel’s mind as favorably as possible, then carefully approach this sensitive subject.
Cadel didn’t expect Garuel to be the first to suspect and bait him, at least not at a time like this.
‘……I have no idea.’
Cadel wasn’t sure if he should take the opportunity now that Garuel had opened that door first, or if he should play dumb and wait for a time when things had calmed down.
And Garuel had no intention of letting Cadel get lost in his thoughts.
“This is disappointing. I thought we were getting pretty close.”
“That’s how I feel too.”
“Then why do you lie? If you’re close to someone, don’t lie to them, at least not in front of them.”
Garuel shifted his body in a light motion, turning Cadel’s shoulders back to face him, then pressed his hands to the straps of his eye patch.
“I’ll show you, so you can be truly surprised. If you truly know nothing, you will see things you never imagined. I heard you have a talent for acting, right?”
“……Sir Garuel.”
“I’ll give you permission to run away.”
Garel’s voice was strangely intense as he roughly untied the straps of the eye patch, and the cloth that covered his eyes slid down.
But before the cloth could fall completely, Cadel hurried to catch it. Pulling the loose cloth back into place, Cadel pressed it against his palm, covering Garuel’s eyes.
Cold, purple eye reflected the panic on Cadel’s face.
“……Since when? Since when did you know?”
“…….”
“How did you know? No, before that…….”
Garuel grabbed Cadel’s wrist, which covered his left eye, and yanked it away.
“Why did you stay next to me even though you knew everything?”
The helpless eye patch crashed down, sweeping across Garuel’s nose and cheek. Cadel stared into his bare, unobscured, jet-black eye. The shame of Garuel that lay deeper than any other scar. Cadel had no choice but to stare.
