Xenia has to kneel over for a moment, putting her hands around her head and taking very deep breaths to calm herself before making any further announcements. The guests watching on are a bit concerned at the display, although given that a few of the dungeon bosses are attempting to suppress giggles as they walk over and read Guy's screens for themselves, they at least don't begin to grow too worried.
Eventually though the dungeon master recovers enough to stand back up and point an accusatory finger in Guy's direction. "You said there were no bad achievements!"
"Well...it's not really bad, is it? It's free loot! Everyone loves free loot, do they not?"
"But the implications, Guy! Think of the implications! Oh, gods, what even are these!? A message from the gods going, 'hey, sorry our dungeon molested you, have a discount coupon as an apology'? And it's a numbered series! There's going to be more where those came from, probably! Ugh, good thing I've got the real avatar running now, I need to get really drunk."
Xenia staggers over to the nearest table before taking a seat and spawning herself an over-sized tankard of ale, before Beatrice comes over to ask the question on behalf of the party's outside observers. "Okay, Xen, I'm getting the feeling something either awful or hilarious just happened. Mind explaining which it was?"
"It's...actually, I think I need a Challenger viewpoint on this. Anyone here ever heard of a dungeon before where people get bonuses if they, uh...lose their virginity during an intrusion? Or stuff like that?"
There's a lot of raised eyebrows and confused expressions, but after a moment a look of realization crosses Sely's face. "Wait...you mean like with Darkest Pits? The so-called Ravager Dungeon?"
Taly still seems confused as she listens to her sister. "Eh? I don't recall hearing of one by that name. What's that one like?"
Sely's eyes narrow a little as she watches Xenia. "Known for capturing Challengers alive and then doing unspeakable acts to them. Challengers being Challengers, and not prone to giving up, I understand the place had quite a long list of victims before it was finally slated for destruction. It was active in the Valleylands right around when they were revolting from the Dragonlord's rule, so it gets overshadowed a bit in the history, but my church's order of paladins was one of the forces used to subdue the place." She peers a little closer at the heavily-drinking dungeon master. "Any particular reason you're asking?"
"Oh, great. The only other dungeon known for this shit got cracked open, just what I needed." Xenia sighs, and then looks back at Sely. "It's nothing harmful, just an apparent assumption that any fornication involving a dungeon monster must be of the non-consensual kind. And apparently now I'm going to be getting a running tally of how many times a boss has boned a mortal, or vice-versa, so that's gonna be fun." She pauses, and then glares at some of the couples who had been wandering off earlier that evening. "Wonder if we just tipped over the finish line for that second one tonight..."
Re-reading the achievement screen, Taly shrugs back at her boss. "Honestly, I'm with Guy on this one. Challengers love extra loot. Although...I don't think we've ever had something going on and then they go to beat up some floor bosses..."
Trush snorts. "Yeah, how would we even put that into play? A party of Challengers comes down on Floor Two, then asks Lollyp if they can have some fun before they kill her?" He smirks, although it fades a little when he notices Lollyp actually looking thoughtful about it.
"Well, you know, if we were having a slow day or something...although it doesn't say it's gotta be on the same intrusion!"
"I don't...I just..." Xenia slams her forehead down on the table. "How are we gonna tell people that they can get paid for boning a dungeon boss!?" She lifts her head back up to look over the assembled crew. "I mean, do you all even want every party coming by to be trying to chat you up?" To her despair, the majority of her staff actually seems to be considering it, although Dips does raise her hand to offer a different viewpoint.
"Yes! Because while they're asking, they'll be excellent targets for my javelins."
DEATH also has a similar line of thought. "IT WOULD MAKE FIGHTS MUCH MORE AMUSING IF THEY DID, I'LL SAY THAT MUCH."
"I suppose it would make working on Floor Five much more interesting..." As Xenia stares at Del, the Maid eventually gives a laugh. "Joking! I'm not that promiscuous a woman, you know! Although if I'm going to be honest, it's that last display which concerns me more. Is that one...my fault, somehow?"
"Right, yeah, let's move on to that one, shall we?" Xenia shakes her head. "Guy, any insights on what we broke there?"
The guide bobs in thought. "Well, now that I look into some of our new monster types more closely, I can say it's certainly not Deylia's fault. Rather, it seems that many of our new divine sprite crossbreeds are tagged as being 'divine servants', by which I assume it means that normally, such a creature would only be available if granted to a dungeon by a god. None of them have been, however, and so there's something of a broken link there. If Deylia is trained as a Priestess by Kahlia as you arranged earlier, perhaps it will complete that link with her information, but until then, the information is left blank."
"But what does that actually mean, now? If I try to use that ability, am I gonna explode? Or does 'followers of null' mean atheists? Cause I'll tell ya, those are real hard to find on a planet where the gods are actually wandering around and doin' shit."
"Ha, well, I believe I can safely discount the risk of explosion. As to the specifics, my guess would be that it will either affect nobody, or it will affect anyone who hasn't devoted their faith to a particular deity, or to some small subset of deities."
Xenia eyes her guests, with a disappointed look. "Man, sure am attracting a devout crowd of groupies these days, ain't I? Ah, Beatrice, you're still a godless heathen, right?"
The warrior looks around, a bit embarrassed by the looks the assembly's paladin and clerics are sending her. "I mean, I don't spurn the gods or anything, Xen. But I haven't joined a church here if that's what you mean."
"Good enough! Maybe. Well, we'll find out, won't we?" Calling forth her menus, Xenia finds the new option that was unlocked for her. "Boosts, boosts, what to pick...huh, fertility is an option, but not something we're testing out tonight...ah, here's an easy one to test." Xenia reaches out a hand, and across the meadow signs begin to appear, a staggered row going off into the distance. "Pick out the furthest one you can read and repeat it for me?"
"Um, alright. Let's say...third one down, says...wait. That's a picture of a dick made out of letters, Xen."
"Sure is! Okay, now, vision boost applied! Can you do the next one down?"
Beatrice blinks a few times. "Whoa, something just happened, it's like my eyes lost focus for a moment there. Alright, alright, let's take a look...okay, can do the fifth sign down now, and it's...heavens, Xenia! Did you draw that entirely out of O's and number threes?"
"And a few D's! Underappreciated art form, really." Xenia snaps her fingers, re-absorbing the signposts to the disappointment of those who didn't get to take a good look at them. "We can pick a new boost every day, but honestly, probably am going to go with that fertility option, at least til we hit our five from Floor Five. Now, what else, what else - oh yeah, biomes! Anyone know anything about those?"
Sable looks around, checking if anyone more expert than her wants to comment first. "Well, the basics are pretty well known, I suppose. Everyone knows dungeons take on forms similar to their environments, but that larger dungeons have more variety. Like, take the Fire Sands for example. Starts off with an ocean theme, beach-side caves and stuff, but deeper down it starts getting more volcanic. That 'Forest' option you mentioned is pretty common too, there's a couple of forest-based dungeons out there. They tend to grow wide rather than deep, mostly. Lots of monsters based on wild animals, plant monsters, insects, that sort of thing. That 'Town' option though...that one sounds strange to me."
Sincere picks up the explanation from there. "Artificial themes for dungeons are certainly much more rare. Dungeons do form in ancient ruins from time to time, and on other continents I've seen at least one dungeon based out of an ancient fortress - although virtually nothing remained of the actual original structure by time I saw it. Such dungeons do seem to be themed based on the culture they formed within, though I don't know if that's based on special unlocks or just how it affected their sense of style. 'Town', however...I'm not sure I've seen a dungeon themed after a town. Perhaps most dungeons don't acquire nearby towns until later in their development...or they form far too close to a town and are destroyed or stolen while they're still quite young."
Xenia nods along. "Yeah, that all makes sense. As for what to pick...well, Forest sounds like a waste for us." She waves her hand around, indicating the forest they are all currently occupying. "So I'm thinking Town. Anyone opposed?" No one speaks up, so after a few moments Xenia goes through her menus once again. "Town it is. This oughtta be interesting..."
As she taps the button, Guy shivers slightly. "Ah! It appears we have a few backlogged upgrades waiting for us, one moment!" Sure enough, another screen full of unlocks soon appears.
| ----------------------- ADDING NEW BASE 'TOWN' MATERIALS: NEW BASE 'TOWN' CONSTRUCT PATTERN QUALITIES ACQUIRED: |
Xenia smiles at the list. "Nice, nice. Now I can take Challengers out through the hazards of lead piping. I'm not...really sure about bovines, but I like the sound of felines!" Waving a hand, a tuxedo-colored cat suddenly appears on the table in front of her. "Kitty!"
A number of excited sounds circle around the table, although Taly seems a bit miffed. "Wait, you haven't added a single dog to the dungeon and you've had canines since you damn near got started, but you gotta make a cat the instant you get the option?"
Xenia shrugs as she scoops the animal up and begins to pet it. "What can I say, just always been a cat person. Or bunny, I guess, if it's an option." Looking around, she spies a number of envious glances. "...Do I need to start making some pets for people?"
Trush rubs his chin. "The dungeon might not be the safest spot for a dog to run wild in, even a dungeon-spawned one. But...perhaps a cat or two for the apartments wouldn't be amiss."
"Fine, fine, we'll sort out who gets what later. Next up, more freebies! Got some random upgrades, so let's see what the great RNG has to offer us, eh?" Xenia hits another command from her menu, and soon enough another screen appears.
| ------------------------ FIVE FREE RANDOM UPGRADES FROM THE SOUL STORE ACQUIRED: |
The dungeon master cheers as she goes over the list. "Whoo! Divine sprites up one, that could help nudge up a bunch of our crossbreeds. And our first A tier! Trush, you're getting a new kit! I'd offer you some, Beatrice, but I'm pretty sure yours is still a few steps higher than that."
Sable grins along with the dungeon bosses. "Better gear means better loot too, yeah? Maybe I should do an actual dungeon run again sometime now - unless you don't mind handing out some freebies to a good friend of the dungeon."
"Excuse you, how many free drinks have you had tonight? Only armor you're getting for free is chainmail bikini armor."
The paladin stops to consider what free armor might be worth. "...Would it be enchanted chainmail bikini armor, or..."
Xenia gives her an evil smirk. "Yeah, with a charisma boost, like the rabbit ears I handed out to that one dude ages back."
At that, Beatrice suddenly jolts upright in her seat. "Wait, Grizza's gear? Oh yeah - open up that mana purse, Xen, we have got to see Sable in a set of this."
DaScoot
Enjoy! We're probably due for a posting of the updated unlocks list next time, I think.
Xenia has to kneel over for a moment, putting her hands around her head and taking very deep breaths to calm herself before making any further announcements. The guests watching on are a bit concerned at the display, although given that a few of the dungeon bosses are attempting to suppress giggles as they walk over and read Guy's screens for themselves, they at least don't begin to grow too worried.
Eventually though the dungeon master recovers enough to stand back up and point an accusatory finger in Guy's direction. "You said there were no bad achievements!"
"Well...it's not really bad, is it? It's free loot! Everyone loves free loot, do they not?"
"But the implications, Guy! Think of the implications! Oh, gods, what even are these!? A message from the gods going, 'hey, sorry our dungeon molested you, have a discount coupon as an apology'? And it's a numbered series! There's going to be more where those came from, probably! Ugh, good thing I've got the real avatar running now, I need to get really drunk."
Xenia staggers over to the nearest table before taking a seat and spawning herself an over-sized tankard of ale, before Beatrice comes over to ask the question on behalf of the party's outside observers. "Okay, Xen, I'm getting the feeling something either awful or hilarious just happened. Mind explaining which it was?"
"It's...actually, I think I need a Challenger viewpoint on this. Anyone here ever heard of a dungeon before where people get bonuses if they, uh...lose their virginity during an intrusion? Or stuff like that?"
There's a lot of raised eyebrows and confused expressions, but after a moment a look of realization crosses Sely's face. "Wait...you mean like with Darkest Pits? The so-called Ravager Dungeon?"
Taly still seems confused as she listens to her sister. "Eh? I don't recall hearing of one by that name. What's that one like?"
Sely's eyes narrow a little as she watches Xenia. "Known for capturing Challengers alive and then doing unspeakable acts to them. Challengers being Challengers, and not prone to giving up, I understand the place had quite a long list of victims before it was finally slated for destruction. It was active in the Valleylands right around when they were revolting from the Dragonlord's rule, so it gets overshadowed a bit in the history, but my church's order of paladins was one of the forces used to subdue the place." She peers a little closer at the heavily-drinking dungeon master. "Any particular reason you're asking?"
"Oh, great. The only other dungeon known for this shit got cracked open, just what I needed." Xenia sighs, and then looks back at Sely. "It's nothing harmful, just an apparent assumption that any fornication involving a dungeon monster must be of the non-consensual kind. And apparently now I'm going to be getting a running tally of how many times a boss has boned a mortal, or vice-versa, so that's gonna be fun." She pauses, and then glares at some of the couples who had been wandering off earlier that evening. "Wonder if we just tipped over the finish line for that second one tonight..."
Re-reading the achievement screen, Taly shrugs back at her boss. "Honestly, I'm with Guy on this one. Challengers love extra loot. Although...I don't think we've ever had something going on and then they go to beat up some floor bosses..."
Trush snorts. "Yeah, how would we even put that into play? A party of Challengers comes down on Floor Two, then asks Lollyp if they can have some fun before they kill her?" He smirks, although it fades a little when he notices Lollyp actually looking thoughtful about it.
"Well, you know, if we were having a slow day or something...although it doesn't say it's gotta be on the same intrusion!"
"I don't...I just..." Xenia slams her forehead down on the table. "How are we gonna tell people that they can get paid for boning a dungeon boss!?" She lifts her head back up to look over the assembled crew. "I mean, do you all even want every party coming by to be trying to chat you up?" To her despair, the majority of her staff actually seems to be considering it, although Dips does raise her hand to offer a different viewpoint.
"Yes! Because while they're asking, they'll be excellent targets for my javelins."
DEATH also has a similar line of thought. "IT WOULD MAKE FIGHTS MUCH MORE AMUSING IF THEY DID, I'LL SAY THAT MUCH."
"I suppose it would make working on Floor Five much more interesting..." As Xenia stares at Del, the Maid eventually gives a laugh. "Joking! I'm not that promiscuous a woman, you know! Although if I'm going to be honest, it's that last display which concerns me more. Is that one...my fault, somehow?"
"Right, yeah, let's move on to that one, shall we?" Xenia shakes her head. "Guy, any insights on what we broke there?"
The guide bobs in thought. "Well, now that I look into some of our new monster types more closely, I can say it's certainly not Deylia's fault. Rather, it seems that many of our new divine sprite crossbreeds are tagged as being 'divine servants', by which I assume it means that normally, such a creature would only be available if granted to a dungeon by a god. None of them have been, however, and so there's something of a broken link there. If Deylia is trained as a Priestess by Kahlia as you arranged earlier, perhaps it will complete that link with her information, but until then, the information is left blank."
"But what does that actually mean, now? If I try to use that ability, am I gonna explode? Or does 'followers of null' mean atheists? Cause I'll tell ya, those are real hard to find on a planet where the gods are actually wandering around and doin' shit."
"Ha, well, I believe I can safely discount the risk of explosion. As to the specifics, my guess would be that it will either affect nobody, or it will affect anyone who hasn't devoted their faith to a particular deity, or to some small subset of deities."
Xenia eyes her guests, with a disappointed look. "Man, sure am attracting a devout crowd of groupies these days, ain't I? Ah, Beatrice, you're still a godless heathen, right?"
The warrior looks around, a bit embarrassed by the looks the assembly's paladin and clerics are sending her. "I mean, I don't spurn the gods or anything, Xen. But I haven't joined a church here if that's what you mean."
"Good enough! Maybe. Well, we'll find out, won't we?" Calling forth her menus, Xenia finds the new option that was unlocked for her. "Boosts, boosts, what to pick...huh, fertility is an option, but not something we're testing out tonight...ah, here's an easy one to test." Xenia reaches out a hand, and across the meadow signs begin to appear, a staggered row going off into the distance. "Pick out the furthest one you can read and repeat it for me?"
"Um, alright. Let's say...third one down, says...wait. That's a picture of a dick made out of letters, Xen."
"Sure is! Okay, now, vision boost applied! Can you do the next one down?"
Beatrice blinks a few times. "Whoa, something just happened, it's like my eyes lost focus for a moment there. Alright, alright, let's take a look...okay, can do the fifth sign down now, and it's...heavens, Xenia! Did you draw that entirely out of O's and number threes?"
"And a few D's! Underappreciated art form, really." Xenia snaps her fingers, re-absorbing the signposts to the disappointment of those who didn't get to take a good look at them. "We can pick a new boost every day, but honestly, probably am going to go with that fertility option, at least til we hit our five from Floor Five. Now, what else, what else - oh yeah, biomes! Anyone know anything about those?"
Sable looks around, checking if anyone more expert than her wants to comment first. "Well, the basics are pretty well known, I suppose. Everyone knows dungeons take on forms similar to their environments, but that larger dungeons have more variety. Like, take the Fire Sands for example. Starts off with an ocean theme, beach-side caves and stuff, but deeper down it starts getting more volcanic. That 'Forest' option you mentioned is pretty common too, there's a couple of forest-based dungeons out there. They tend to grow wide rather than deep, mostly. Lots of monsters based on wild animals, plant monsters, insects, that sort of thing. That 'Town' option though...that one sounds strange to me."
Sincere picks up the explanation from there. "Artificial themes for dungeons are certainly much more rare. Dungeons do form in ancient ruins from time to time, and on other continents I've seen at least one dungeon based out of an ancient fortress - although virtually nothing remained of the actual original structure by time I saw it. Such dungeons do seem to be themed based on the culture they formed within, though I don't know if that's based on special unlocks or just how it affected their sense of style. 'Town', however...I'm not sure I've seen a dungeon themed after a town. Perhaps most dungeons don't acquire nearby towns until later in their development...or they form far too close to a town and are destroyed or stolen while they're still quite young."
Xenia nods along. "Yeah, that all makes sense. As for what to pick...well, Forest sounds like a waste for us." She waves her hand around, indicating the forest they are all currently occupying. "So I'm thinking Town. Anyone opposed?" No one speaks up, so after a few moments Xenia goes through her menus once again. "Town it is. This oughtta be interesting..."
As she taps the button, Guy shivers slightly. "Ah! It appears we have a few backlogged upgrades waiting for us, one moment!" Sure enough, another screen full of unlocks soon appears.
| ----------------------- ADDING NEW BASE 'TOWN' MATERIALS: NEW BASE 'TOWN' CONSTRUCT PATTERN QUALITIES ACQUIRED: |
Xenia smiles at the list. "Nice, nice. Now I can take Challengers out through the hazards of lead piping. I'm not...really sure about bovines, but I like the sound of felines!" Waving a hand, a tuxedo-colored cat suddenly appears on the table in front of her. "Kitty!"
A number of excited sounds circle around the table, although Taly seems a bit miffed. "Wait, you haven't added a single dog to the dungeon and you've had canines since you damn near got started, but you gotta make a cat the instant you get the option?"
Xenia shrugs as she scoops the animal up and begins to pet it. "What can I say, just always been a cat person. Or bunny, I guess, if it's an option." Looking around, she spies a number of envious glances. "...Do I need to start making some pets for people?"
Trush rubs his chin. "The dungeon might not be the safest spot for a dog to run wild in, even a dungeon-spawned one. But...perhaps a cat or two for the apartments wouldn't be amiss."
"Fine, fine, we'll sort out who gets what later. Next up, more freebies! Got some random upgrades, so let's see what the great RNG has to offer us, eh?" Xenia hits another command from her menu, and soon enough another screen appears.
| ------------------------ FIVE FREE RANDOM UPGRADES FROM THE SOUL STORE ACQUIRED: |
The dungeon master cheers as she goes over the list. "Whoo! Divine sprites up one, that could help nudge up a bunch of our crossbreeds. And our first A tier! Trush, you're getting a new kit! I'd offer you some, Beatrice, but I'm pretty sure yours is still a few steps higher than that."
Sable grins along with the dungeon bosses. "Better gear means better loot too, yeah? Maybe I should do an actual dungeon run again sometime now - unless you don't mind handing out some freebies to a good friend of the dungeon."
"Excuse you, how many free drinks have you had tonight? Only armor you're getting for free is chainmail bikini armor."
The paladin stops to consider what free armor might be worth. "...Would it be enchanted chainmail bikini armor, or..."
Xenia gives her an evil smirk. "Yeah, with a charisma boost, like the rabbit ears I handed out to that one dude ages back."
At that, Beatrice suddenly jolts upright in her seat. "Wait, Grizza's gear? Oh yeah - open up that mana purse, Xen, we have got to see Sable in a set of this."
DaScoot
Enjoy! We're probably due for a posting of the updated unlocks list next time, I think.
