To my dismay when I wake up my spider legs are out.
Naturally, I'm extremely startled, but manage to pull them back without destroying anything.
It seems they extend whenever I get too comfortable and let my guard down against them coming out.
They aren't really ugly, but more like metallic spears ready to pierce something, which is extremely intimidating.
And the fact that they are spider legs is troubling me in addition.
Also, it's simply distressing to wake up in an embrace of your own legs.
Because this happened, I need to think about how Talisa said that this is only a partial transformation.
I could turn completely into a spider if I'm not careful.
This might just be appearance, but with my fear of spiders, I might lose my mind if this happens.
I put the clothes on I detected yesterday.
This time the colors are a light silverish grey and a light violet.
It is a layered piece of clothing just for the upper body, which looks like from a warm country, and a long skirt with embroidery and frills.
All these clothes have something princess-like.
Maybe this is Talisa’s hobby?
Now I am properly outfitted, however...
I am still not confident enough to leave and wander around on my own.
The probability to encounter spiders in the sanctuary is quite low, as they simply have no tasks here, but the chance is there with those numbers.
Since my mind is constantly strained by this whole situation, maybe I will calm down with time, yet for now this is too much.
Things being like this, I can only stay inside.
Also, I have to take care of another urge.
I need to pee!
Fortunately, there's something like a toilet installed in this room.
Or more a heightened position with a hole where you cannot fathom the end of it.
There is also some threadwork for cleaning, so I am sure about the purpose of this place.
The disturbing thing happens during the usage.
First, it's astonishing that I just now have to go, as it seems that my intervals got extremely lengthened with the transformation, but the reason could be the second part.
It sizzles!
My pee sounds like it would deepen the hole down there by burning straight through the stone!
Everything I take in gets first dissolved with an extremely nasty acid and this is inhuman!
Maybe I shouldn't wonder about a lack of normalcy, yet this feels so wrong to me.
My pee shouldn't be a weapon.
Not this dangerous something, you need cautiously get rid of!
This isn't right!
A little downtrodden I sit back on my bed and try to calm down.
"Good morning Nerysi! Can I come in or are you occupied?" (T)
Talisa!
She's very intimidating, yet courteous, and has a caring side, as you can see with all the things she brought to my room yesterday.
"I-it's fine!" (N)
She might have left me yesterday, but at least she's not showing as much of her monstrous nature.
So I can feel somewhat calm around her, as she drives the other monsters away.
"It is good to see you're in a good state. Did it work out yesterday with Masiabi?" (T)
Do you mean after you sold me out to her?
"She did not really keep her part with not assaulting me and brought me to the gathering halls. Besides that we just ate something in this hall with the big table." (N)
"It seems I need to talk with her about that. Anything else?" (T)
"Ehm, are all of you sharing her thoughts about killing and eating humans?" (N)
"Well... look: It's not like we specifically hunt them down. But to us, it is a waste if we leave the corpses to rot when they die in our territory. And we can't talk it out with them. Humans as a society tend to take advantage of you if you don't hold against it. We cannot allow others to hunt in our territory or we'll lose our prey. And they will come and stay if they notice that it works out for them. Despite that, too many of them already died here to hope that they will ever think positively about Arachnae." (T)
"So you want to kill them?" (N)
"If you ask me, I would rather avoid them without getting noticed. Eritu harnesses deep aversions, which grow with every dead familiar to add to her grudge, so she's rather hostile. Akasia is oddly fascinated by them, but never complained about our general direction. And Kyroki is foremost into her experiments, yet would possibly poison a village or two, if only to study the effects." (T)
"I don't know about the other two but Eritu didn't look like she would hate me." (N)
"Keke... Because you're not human! She's directly distinguishing at this line and besides this, I doubt you ever killed anything, much less a spider, regarding your little issue." (T)
"I... I killed flies!" (N)
"Mhm. Yes... Good for you?" (T)
I feel like I'm looked down upon.
In addition, it seems I cannot convince anyone here that there is a difference between me and a normal Arachne, which is making it harder to convince myself.
"So, I wanted to tell you that I made myself free today, so I have time for you. You should learn how to use your silk I think. Maybe you can by the end of the day make something to catch flies, kekeke!" (T)
I'm certainly looked down upon!
Why am I even competing about killing here?!
"We can go to my place if you like. I've driven all the brood out, so there shouldn't be any issues." (T)
She seems very eager to do this with all those preparations, but I still feel quite uncomfortable with the idea.
However, I glance down at my current outfit.
Based on her creations, she is an incredible seamstress.
There would be people willing to pay to be her apprentice, if she were human.
And it would be nice to be able to make beautiful clothes.
Maybe I could avoid certain spiders by sewing in my room?
It may be worth it to at least try once.
Eventually, I nod in admission.
We walk through the sanctuary, yet sometimes there are spiders.
However, they leave as soon as Talisa comes close.
"Can you really control all these spiders?" (N)
"I directly control my own brood with simple thoughts, and to all spiders I can communicate my will at a certain distance and even make them permanently mine. Though, the brood of the others only listens if they have no different orders and can't be controlled. You did the same. Your familiars initially belonged to Eritu and she freed them of her will. So you claimed them subconsciously when they entered your body." (T)
A shiver runs down my spine when I think about them.
Especially, when I think about my time in the cocoon.
The simple thought of them digging into my body makes my skin crawl.
Or is it them, crawling inside me?
Nonetheless, I can take as a good thing out of her explanation, that I can now tell spiders to leave me alone.
This might be the first good side-effect for me.
After a short while, we reach her place.
The room turns dark, with far fewer light stones in here.
"Sorry, I don't like light so much. One of the reasons why I stay inside here. But the work area is properly lighted." (T)
So she prefers darkness.
Not surprising, considering everything about her is black.
The construction is alike to the one in my room, yet far bigger with many more adds and modifications.
I can't even imagine how something like this is used to its fullest.
"Sit down please! We are starting with the basics." (T)
"Uhm, basics?" (N)
"First, you need to learn how to produce silk." (T)
Produce silk!?
That mere thought makes me uneasy.
"You, you mean I have to make something come out of my body? That sounds dirty." (N)
"It isn't! The silk will be extremely clean. And as far as I know, even the humans hold our silk in high regard. It is something very precious and you should be proud of it. I've heard there are even occasions where countries are accepting the losses of human life, just because they instead gain a steady supply of this resource. Such petty beings!" (T)
I didn't know this, but it makes sense.
Although I trampled with my spider legs through the bed it was rather worn out than ripped.
Also, the material feels extremely fine.
Such a resilient material that is so light and of such high quality should be special.
I probably should at least try to understand how my own body works, even if I feel bad about it.
Maybe I only feel bad because I associate webs with spiders.
However, a single thread is different from a web and so I can dodge with this way of thinking, I guess.
In the end, it is just some kind of white cord!
Okay, I can do this!
"Okay, how can I make the silk?" (N)
"There are two possibilities. We start with the simple one before you tie yourself up by mistake. You just pull it out of your navel." (T)
I can't do this!
"My navel? Such a thing. I mean it isn't meant for this and I will feel weird. My navel should be a weak spot I mean..." (N)
"Calm down! Your senses adjusted with your transformation. It won't hurt and you can do it without being anxious." (T)
"But what am I supposed to do if I end up with strings protruding out of me?! That would be bad! And I don't want this!" (N)
"You simply stop producing the silk. It will just end the thread then and nothing bad happens. Your body is able to clean itself from such things." (T)
This sounds assuring, nonetheless pulling something out of my navel is like a foreign horror in my eyes.
"Just concentrate on that place and think about silk. Think about the place directly behind it, relax it, and apply pressure in repetition till you get a special feeling you need to hold onto." (T)
I don't want to and feel bad thinking about this.
My thoughts on how something like silk gets produced at this place behind my navel make me stressed out.
I cramp my muscles a little and can't look away from my, in these clothes, exposed waist.
So that kind of revealing design was intentional!
And then it happens.
A substance emerges from my navel.
It seems my dread and unwillingness in fact just triggered what I feared.
"You've done well! Now pick it up with your fingers!" (T)
There is this odd feeling in my stomach and more is released.
I take it before it becomes too much.
"Good! If you think you have too much to handle, put it on the hooks at the station and wrap it around." (T)
I don't really want to hold it in my hand with where it came from so I put it on the construction.
The strands are thick yet even and remind me of the clothes I'm wearing, which are still much finer.
As more gets released I can barely manage to put it away, threatened to become overwhelmed.
"Now you cut it! Just avert your thoughts a moment!" (T)
As if I can! I've lost control!
Suddenly there's a stinging pain coming from my forehead.
I need a moment to realize that Talisa flicked her finger against it.
"Stay focused and clear in mind! This thread can be dangerous if you get tangled up in it. There's only a limited number of ways to get you out again." (T)
I look dumbfounded at her, but then I notice...
It stopped!
Her snap brought me out of my daze and averted my mind.
She helped me!
"It was good to do it like this. You are apparently prone to lose your concentration. Your navel makes the thickest and strongest threads but is the easiest to work with, as it is more rough work with a single big strand. You can also make them sticky if you adjust the production in your mind, however, we should postpone this until you can work with the normal one." (T)
I feel a bit dejected, yet when I look up I notice that the construction is almost overfilled at the parts where I stored the silk.
This is a crazy amount and I lost control.
"But now to the second way to produce the silk. It's very simple. Under your nails are glands that produce the strands. All ten of them. Those threads are far thinner, so it's more difficult to work with them. Also, you would be more prone to get tangled up since you can't get rid of it from your fingers. Just try one finger and concentrate as well as possible or you might trigger the others. And if that happens you would surely again lose control. This is too advanced for you yet." (T)
My fingers!
It might be interesting to work like this.
The ultimate tailor, having the material always at hand.
I concentrate on my index finger and call the feeling from before back to my mind.
Soon the thread comes out.
This time I feel more comfortable with the process and can control it.
"Good! Use your nails to guide the strand and lay it on the construction. When you get better you can make just the tip sticky to fix it in place. This is a little trick that helps getting started." (T)
This feels far more professional than before and I can cut the thread without problems when I want it.
We continue for some hours and I think I get better.
I attempted to use some sticky strands, but was just allowed the tiniest amount.
I could in the end use one finger on each hand simultaneously and got instructed in the right manner to move them and hold the threads.
Actual sewing was not really part of it. Just some knotting and such.
"That's it for today. You can use your own device to train by yourself, but never more than your navel or one finger, and always be extremely careful! And don't overdo it, since it costs you energy and you might overextend yourself." (T)
This seems far more dangerous than anticipated.
She has great respect for the thread.
And I can understand her way of thinking, this stuff is nearly impossible to sever.
Also, those threads from the fingers are so thin and stable that they can easily cut through flesh.
So I should respect it as well.
Talisa leads me back to my room and I note that I've got tired.
The flow of time is really hard to follow without daylight.
I realize that I don't even know if I am nocturnal.
That wouldn't be the most outrageous thing for me.
I mean, what does it matter to me during what hours I rest compared to all the rest?
But I have nothing against digging into my bed.
This is one of the only nice things I have for myself.
Yet I need to say that the threading was, apart from the distressing parts, a bit fun.
Maybe I can make it through all of this.
"Ah, I wanted to tell you that Akasia has asked to meet you tomorrow. She seems to be a little jealous that she was left out after all the others, except Kyroki, met you already. So she asked if you could come to her place. She even said that she'd drive out all her familiars for the time being." (T)
This is a difficult request.
It would mean meeting another monster.
However, this is inevitable anyways.
It might be better to get along with all of them instead of drawing hostility and I was told that none of them has bad feelings for me.
"O-okay, I will go!" (N)
"I will tell her later." (T)
At least she asked properly unlike certain others who just jump me down.
When we arrive I find a new sac with liquid on my table.
"I thought you might prefer to eat here instead of in our dining hall. By the way, you can dine comfortably, we caught not a single human since we found you." (T)
This is very considerate of her.
I prefer being here to outside, where spiders and certain overly affectionate apex predators might be, so eating at the table I got last time seems preferable.
But this tableware I find on it is new!
"Oh, it seems Akasia brought her own welcome gift for you." (T)
You can see that it is made from etched stone, but the craftsmanship required to do such a thing must be incredible.
Nonetheless, any sane person should be wary of people who work with acid, especially to dissolve living beings, and are so extremely fond of it.
To my dismay when I wake up my spider legs are out.
Naturally, I'm extremely startled, but manage to pull them back without destroying anything.
It seems they extend whenever I get too comfortable and let my guard down against them coming out.
They aren't really ugly, but more like metallic spears ready to pierce something, which is extremely intimidating.
And the fact that they are spider legs is troubling me in addition.
Also, it's simply distressing to wake up in an embrace of your own legs.
Because this happened, I need to think about how Talisa said that this is only a partial transformation.
I could turn completely into a spider if I'm not careful.
This might just be appearance, but with my fear of spiders, I might lose my mind if this happens.
I put the clothes on I detected yesterday.
This time the colors are a light silverish grey and a light violet.
It is a layered piece of clothing just for the upper body, which looks like from a warm country, and a long skirt with embroidery and frills.
All these clothes have something princess-like.
Maybe this is Talisa’s hobby?
Now I am properly outfitted, however...
I am still not confident enough to leave and wander around on my own.
The probability to encounter spiders in the sanctuary is quite low, as they simply have no tasks here, but the chance is there with those numbers.
Since my mind is constantly strained by this whole situation, maybe I will calm down with time, yet for now this is too much.
Things being like this, I can only stay inside.
Also, I have to take care of another urge.
I need to pee!
Fortunately, there's something like a toilet installed in this room.
Or more a heightened position with a hole where you cannot fathom the end of it.
There is also some threadwork for cleaning, so I am sure about the purpose of this place.
The disturbing thing happens during the usage.
First, it's astonishing that I just now have to go, as it seems that my intervals got extremely lengthened with the transformation, but the reason could be the second part.
It sizzles!
My pee sounds like it would deepen the hole down there by burning straight through the stone!
Everything I take in gets first dissolved with an extremely nasty acid and this is inhuman!
Maybe I shouldn't wonder about a lack of normalcy, yet this feels so wrong to me.
My pee shouldn't be a weapon.
Not this dangerous something, you need cautiously get rid of!
This isn't right!
A little downtrodden I sit back on my bed and try to calm down.
"Good morning Nerysi! Can I come in or are you occupied?" (T)
Talisa!
She's very intimidating, yet courteous, and has a caring side, as you can see with all the things she brought to my room yesterday.
"I-it's fine!" (N)
She might have left me yesterday, but at least she's not showing as much of her monstrous nature.
So I can feel somewhat calm around her, as she drives the other monsters away.
"It is good to see you're in a good state. Did it work out yesterday with Masiabi?" (T)
Do you mean after you sold me out to her?
"She did not really keep her part with not assaulting me and brought me to the gathering halls. Besides that we just ate something in this hall with the big table." (N)
"It seems I need to talk with her about that. Anything else?" (T)
"Ehm, are all of you sharing her thoughts about killing and eating humans?" (N)
"Well... look: It's not like we specifically hunt them down. But to us, it is a waste if we leave the corpses to rot when they die in our territory. And we can't talk it out with them. Humans as a society tend to take advantage of you if you don't hold against it. We cannot allow others to hunt in our territory or we'll lose our prey. And they will come and stay if they notice that it works out for them. Despite that, too many of them already died here to hope that they will ever think positively about Arachnae." (T)
"So you want to kill them?" (N)
"If you ask me, I would rather avoid them without getting noticed. Eritu harnesses deep aversions, which grow with every dead familiar to add to her grudge, so she's rather hostile. Akasia is oddly fascinated by them, but never complained about our general direction. And Kyroki is foremost into her experiments, yet would possibly poison a village or two, if only to study the effects." (T)
"I don't know about the other two but Eritu didn't look like she would hate me." (N)
"Keke... Because you're not human! She's directly distinguishing at this line and besides this, I doubt you ever killed anything, much less a spider, regarding your little issue." (T)
"I... I killed flies!" (N)
"Mhm. Yes... Good for you?" (T)
I feel like I'm looked down upon.
In addition, it seems I cannot convince anyone here that there is a difference between me and a normal Arachne, which is making it harder to convince myself.
"So, I wanted to tell you that I made myself free today, so I have time for you. You should learn how to use your silk I think. Maybe you can by the end of the day make something to catch flies, kekeke!" (T)
I'm certainly looked down upon!
Why am I even competing about killing here?!
"We can go to my place if you like. I've driven all the brood out, so there shouldn't be any issues." (T)
She seems very eager to do this with all those preparations, but I still feel quite uncomfortable with the idea.
However, I glance down at my current outfit.
Based on her creations, she is an incredible seamstress.
There would be people willing to pay to be her apprentice, if she were human.
And it would be nice to be able to make beautiful clothes.
Maybe I could avoid certain spiders by sewing in my room?
It may be worth it to at least try once.
Eventually, I nod in admission.
We walk through the sanctuary, yet sometimes there are spiders.
However, they leave as soon as Talisa comes close.
"Can you really control all these spiders?" (N)
"I directly control my own brood with simple thoughts, and to all spiders I can communicate my will at a certain distance and even make them permanently mine. Though, the brood of the others only listens if they have no different orders and can't be controlled. You did the same. Your familiars initially belonged to Eritu and she freed them of her will. So you claimed them subconsciously when they entered your body." (T)
A shiver runs down my spine when I think about them.
Especially, when I think about my time in the cocoon.
The simple thought of them digging into my body makes my skin crawl.
Or is it them, crawling inside me?
Nonetheless, I can take as a good thing out of her explanation, that I can now tell spiders to leave me alone.
This might be the first good side-effect for me.
After a short while, we reach her place.
The room turns dark, with far fewer light stones in here.
"Sorry, I don't like light so much. One of the reasons why I stay inside here. But the work area is properly lighted." (T)
So she prefers darkness.
Not surprising, considering everything about her is black.
The construction is alike to the one in my room, yet far bigger with many more adds and modifications.
I can't even imagine how something like this is used to its fullest.
"Sit down please! We are starting with the basics." (T)
"Uhm, basics?" (N)
"First, you need to learn how to produce silk." (T)
Produce silk!?
That mere thought makes me uneasy.
"You, you mean I have to make something come out of my body? That sounds dirty." (N)
"It isn't! The silk will be extremely clean. And as far as I know, even the humans hold our silk in high regard. It is something very precious and you should be proud of it. I've heard there are even occasions where countries are accepting the losses of human life, just because they instead gain a steady supply of this resource. Such petty beings!" (T)
I didn't know this, but it makes sense.
Although I trampled with my spider legs through the bed it was rather worn out than ripped.
Also, the material feels extremely fine.
Such a resilient material that is so light and of such high quality should be special.
I probably should at least try to understand how my own body works, even if I feel bad about it.
Maybe I only feel bad because I associate webs with spiders.
However, a single thread is different from a web and so I can dodge with this way of thinking, I guess.
In the end, it is just some kind of white cord!
Okay, I can do this!
"Okay, how can I make the silk?" (N)
"There are two possibilities. We start with the simple one before you tie yourself up by mistake. You just pull it out of your navel." (T)
I can't do this!
"My navel? Such a thing. I mean it isn't meant for this and I will feel weird. My navel should be a weak spot I mean..." (N)
"Calm down! Your senses adjusted with your transformation. It won't hurt and you can do it without being anxious." (T)
"But what am I supposed to do if I end up with strings protruding out of me?! That would be bad! And I don't want this!" (N)
"You simply stop producing the silk. It will just end the thread then and nothing bad happens. Your body is able to clean itself from such things." (T)
This sounds assuring, nonetheless pulling something out of my navel is like a foreign horror in my eyes.
"Just concentrate on that place and think about silk. Think about the place directly behind it, relax it, and apply pressure in repetition till you get a special feeling you need to hold onto." (T)
I don't want to and feel bad thinking about this.
My thoughts on how something like silk gets produced at this place behind my navel make me stressed out.
I cramp my muscles a little and can't look away from my, in these clothes, exposed waist.
So that kind of revealing design was intentional!
And then it happens.
A substance emerges from my navel.
It seems my dread and unwillingness in fact just triggered what I feared.
"You've done well! Now pick it up with your fingers!" (T)
There is this odd feeling in my stomach and more is released.
I take it before it becomes too much.
"Good! If you think you have too much to handle, put it on the hooks at the station and wrap it around." (T)
I don't really want to hold it in my hand with where it came from so I put it on the construction.
The strands are thick yet even and remind me of the clothes I'm wearing, which are still much finer.
As more gets released I can barely manage to put it away, threatened to become overwhelmed.
"Now you cut it! Just avert your thoughts a moment!" (T)
As if I can! I've lost control!
Suddenly there's a stinging pain coming from my forehead.
I need a moment to realize that Talisa flicked her finger against it.
"Stay focused and clear in mind! This thread can be dangerous if you get tangled up in it. There's only a limited number of ways to get you out again." (T)
I look dumbfounded at her, but then I notice...
It stopped!
Her snap brought me out of my daze and averted my mind.
She helped me!
"It was good to do it like this. You are apparently prone to lose your concentration. Your navel makes the thickest and strongest threads but is the easiest to work with, as it is more rough work with a single big strand. You can also make them sticky if you adjust the production in your mind, however, we should postpone this until you can work with the normal one." (T)
I feel a bit dejected, yet when I look up I notice that the construction is almost overfilled at the parts where I stored the silk.
This is a crazy amount and I lost control.
"But now to the second way to produce the silk. It's very simple. Under your nails are glands that produce the strands. All ten of them. Those threads are far thinner, so it's more difficult to work with them. Also, you would be more prone to get tangled up since you can't get rid of it from your fingers. Just try one finger and concentrate as well as possible or you might trigger the others. And if that happens you would surely again lose control. This is too advanced for you yet." (T)
My fingers!
It might be interesting to work like this.
The ultimate tailor, having the material always at hand.
I concentrate on my index finger and call the feeling from before back to my mind.
Soon the thread comes out.
This time I feel more comfortable with the process and can control it.
"Good! Use your nails to guide the strand and lay it on the construction. When you get better you can make just the tip sticky to fix it in place. This is a little trick that helps getting started." (T)
This feels far more professional than before and I can cut the thread without problems when I want it.
We continue for some hours and I think I get better.
I attempted to use some sticky strands, but was just allowed the tiniest amount.
I could in the end use one finger on each hand simultaneously and got instructed in the right manner to move them and hold the threads.
Actual sewing was not really part of it. Just some knotting and such.
"That's it for today. You can use your own device to train by yourself, but never more than your navel or one finger, and always be extremely careful! And don't overdo it, since it costs you energy and you might overextend yourself." (T)
This seems far more dangerous than anticipated.
She has great respect for the thread.
And I can understand her way of thinking, this stuff is nearly impossible to sever.
Also, those threads from the fingers are so thin and stable that they can easily cut through flesh.
So I should respect it as well.
Talisa leads me back to my room and I note that I've got tired.
The flow of time is really hard to follow without daylight.
I realize that I don't even know if I am nocturnal.
That wouldn't be the most outrageous thing for me.
I mean, what does it matter to me during what hours I rest compared to all the rest?
But I have nothing against digging into my bed.
This is one of the only nice things I have for myself.
Yet I need to say that the threading was, apart from the distressing parts, a bit fun.
Maybe I can make it through all of this.
"Ah, I wanted to tell you that Akasia has asked to meet you tomorrow. She seems to be a little jealous that she was left out after all the others, except Kyroki, met you already. So she asked if you could come to her place. She even said that she'd drive out all her familiars for the time being." (T)
This is a difficult request.
It would mean meeting another monster.
However, this is inevitable anyways.
It might be better to get along with all of them instead of drawing hostility and I was told that none of them has bad feelings for me.
"O-okay, I will go!" (N)
"I will tell her later." (T)
At least she asked properly unlike certain others who just jump me down.
When we arrive I find a new sac with liquid on my table.
"I thought you might prefer to eat here instead of in our dining hall. By the way, you can dine comfortably, we caught not a single human since we found you." (T)
This is very considerate of her.
I prefer being here to outside, where spiders and certain overly affectionate apex predators might be, so eating at the table I got last time seems preferable.
But this tableware I find on it is new!
"Oh, it seems Akasia brought her own welcome gift for you." (T)
You can see that it is made from etched stone, but the craftsmanship required to do such a thing must be incredible.
Nonetheless, any sane person should be wary of people who work with acid, especially to dissolve living beings, and are so extremely fond of it.
