"Mono/Dialogue"
'Inner thoughts'
Narration
[Message/communication apparatus]
Date: Data not found
Location: Data not found
POV: Narrator
The debacle that caused the major disruption should have caused Nyx to suffer a lot of consequences… but because of unprecedented amount of investment and popularity her little improvisation brought to the table, K.G.C.C. was forced to just give her a stern warning…
Then again she still comply with her contract of making the Major more popular…
It didn’t end there, Kazimierz now have 2 major nationwide, and even international, sensations. Degenbrecher stunning victory during Kazimierz Major on her first try, and Nyx’ siren-like singing performance. The former was due to how powerful she is, while the latter was due to how unexpected it is. Nyx was always known to be a ruthless mercenary… not a charming and dazzling singer with hypnotizing voice…
On a completely, definitely, unrelated note, Kazimierz’s social media had a sudden resurge of Higashinese terminology called Gap-moe. The reason is something that, to this very day, cannot be comprehended. Yeah, definitely…
Back to the topic…
Degenbrecher has been officially granted the Grand Knight title with her moniker as “The” Black Knight due to how unwavering and utterly fearsome she is in combat, unlike grand knights before her. She is still in the process of creating her own Knight Order, but potential applicants had reached thousands both from inside and outside of Kawalerielki.
Nyx is also having the greatest headache of her life, her fanbase practically multiplied itself to the point that she now has her own fanatics in the thousands. She is also being hounded by entertainment agencies left and right, for another obvious reason, but it was quite entertaining how a single photo of her genuinely smiling had lit the entertainment sphere on fire.
Several leaks had also spread where Degenbrecher was seen having the time of her life partying up and for Nyx to be in what appears to be a dinner date. Their respective fanbase were thrilled and dismayed, respectively, with these leaks, but it is not like either of them care anyway.
Not to mention that to even entertain harming either of them would resulted of them being turned into a pretzel, on a good day. So these fanboys and fangirls can only curse these lucky fellows seen in the leaks, while the more rabid one starts hunting them, with predictable result…
Now, the Grey Serpent got herself another moniker, the Silver Siren. Partly due to a lot of people now doubting her true race to be anything but ordinary Pythian, partly again because her voice was truly intoxicating for their ears, like a siren’ invitation in myth, and mostly because it rolled off the tongue better by the end of the day.
Another important piece of information, Degenbrecher had received substantial backing from several chairmen while Nyx had finally shed her neutrality to side with… the Nearl Family. Her reception with the 3 factions are all professional and businesslike, but she will always takes the Nearl’ side 10 / 10 times.
No one knows why Nyx sided with a failing family, thus the repercussions are minimal. It is only a matter of time before the Nearl fade into obscurity… or is it?
Date: 4th December 1082
Location: Nearl’s Mansion, Kawalerielki, Kazimierz
POV: Zofia
“Alright! This time, I’ll cook breakfast, no way big sis is awake at the moment! Hehe~ I’ll also show Mar that I’m a dependable older sister!” I said to no one in particular while skipping down the staircase towards the kitchen, still…
Big sis actually returned home after strong-arming Młynar to stay for a bit longer, don’t know for what though. He hadn’t left the Nearl’s Mansion for 3 days now… but I wonder where those two are right now since their respective bedroom is opened and empty.
Also I have a much more personal reasoning…
“Why did Mar called me auntie these days!? That was so embarrassing… it also made me feel old! Hmph! I’ll show her that I’m no old hag.” Why am I so annoyed when someone called me auntie? Whatever, I’ll think about it later.
“Hmm? The door to the lounge is ajar? I wonder who’s in it, couldn’t be Mar or Maria, that’s for sure… Might as well check it out.” I slinked towards the door carefully, and the view that I saw almost made me squeal in delight and joy.
I see Big Sis and that blockheaded cousin of mine cuddling on the sofa! Big sis really tucked herself comfortably into his arms, while that insensitive blockhead seems to be cradling her in a protective embrace…
Aww… The face of bliss and contentment on her face is so adorably cute… the blockhead face is still scowling but that’s just how he is… wait… a corner of his mouth is curled upward a little… I knew it, while he is indeed an almost irredeemable blockhead, at least he is aware of her feelings. Oh wait! I can use this~
“Hehe… where is my PT… aha there it is… hehehe.” I got dirt on Big Sis and Młynar now, with this I can finally force her to up her training while making that blockhead to finally make good of his promise! My career as a powerful, respected, knight will soon be upon my grasp and I can finally become a good… um… what was the term again? Something about wing… meh
“*cough* *cough*”
My body gone stiff all of a sudden, I was so focused on seeing them that neglected my guard. Turning around I can see Uncle Kiril is looking at me in puzzlement… wait, he was unable to move, was it not!? Why is he here!?
“U-u-uncle! You shouldn’t be straining yourself! Why are you out of your bed without telling anyone!?” I whispered a bit louder than I intended too, luckily those two are still blissfully sleeping without much care.
“Goodness me. *cough* I had a sudden urge to walk around, not to mention that my vigor had recovered somewhat… *cough*… Can’t just lay down like a potato or a hibernating burdenbeasts every day now, can’t I?”
“B-b-but your afflic-”
“Zofia… I’m fine *cough* *cough* besides… why are you here? You’re usually competing with Nyx for the chance of making breakfast, from what Margaret told me from time to time anyway.” He chuckled a little, but I want to see what he’ll think about this.
“Well… yes… I should have. But you see! I’m currently looking at something really interesting inside the lounge!”
“Truly? What is it?”
“It would be better if you take a look at it yourself.”
Uncle Kiril unsteadily walked towards the door, his constitution is unlike what it once was… he is limping, his back is a tad hunched, his breathing is on the rougher side, and his blond hair had turned white here and there… I know I shouldn’t talk about it… but the day when he returned with a completely exhausted figure and expression had carved itself deep in my mind.
I can only imagine what Margaret, Maria, and Młynar felt back then…
Uncle finally made it to the door and he gasped quietly, before his face turned into a smile. He said nothing and left them alone, he turned his head to me and say what is on his mind to me.
“Zofia, let them rest… *cough* cough* we have 2 stubborn people now… haha…” Uncle then left the hallway, he is going back upstairs to rest up again.
“Yes, uncle.”
I understand since big sis was a real busybody once she knows we need something she would do it without being asked to, even when she just arrived from her own work. There was that one time she barged into a postal office because we got sent what was in all honesty death threats, let’s just say her furious face is putting it lightly.
At this moment, everyone knows that big sis is aligned with us. Not with the Adeptus, not K.A, and not K.G.C.C. she made it abundantly clear, she still received jobs regarding mercenary works. But now she focused most of her time for taking care of us.
Then the more recent one like yesterday when I offhandedly remarked that there is problem with some things like winter supplies. Big sis just told me to go sleep and immediately go outside herself… at 11 P.M…
I know that she is really overprotective… but it feels like she worked herself for us like a servant. That’s also the reason why I’m getting up earlier these days, she won’t budge when being told to look for herself first.
You know it is funny when she always complained that the Nearls are all so stubborn, while she herself is not so different… Maybe that’s one of the reason why she was already accepted into the family. Honestly, this family is really made up of stubborn people.
Now if only a certain someone can coax her to stop being so stubborn, to take things easier and not acting like it is the end of the world every 5 minutes or so.
Big sis always said that she has plenty of chance for lazing around in her apartment, thus her work hour’s ethics is always a 1/1 copy to being outright workaholic.
Well enough of that, it is my turn to show my dependability!
‘Hmm~ hmm~ I’m one going to show them what I’m made of! Here comes Zofia, a soon to be famous and dependable knightess!’
Guess it is time for me to show off my culinary arts! Big sis’ teaching and training worked tremendously well! Margaret was really jealous that I can cooked so well, so I’ll awe her with my culinary arts to finally force her to call me big sis. My plan is foolproof!
POV: Młynar
“…” I stirred awake from my sleep… last night was probably the first time I can rest so relaxed and eased off my mental exhaustion. I felt… odd, however. Like something is on top of my right arm, it doesn’t feel heavy or discomforting however. Then I moved my eyes towards the source…
“...Nyx?” It was quite a startling sight, she was never this bold before… internally panicking I look on ourselves that, thankfully, the both of us are still clothed. I’m having a headache of how did this happened… I tried to remember what happened yesterday, and I succeed.
She said that since yesterday was my birthday, an event I always neglect since it is pointless, I got strong-armed to rest, one way or another. I was really exhausted but she was humming a soothing melody that reinvigorate my nerves. Her surprise singing last year seems to solidify some insights on her natural arts construct.
While at it she gave me a proposition…
Flashback
“Hey Mwi, can you help me out with something?” I’m currently laying my head on her lap, it was relaxing and comforting experience… it happened regularly every time she ambushed me on the way home from another taxing search and investigation. In short, she forced me to comply, and I somehow having a hard time saying no.
“Sure.” I have nothing to do at the moment, courtesy of this one, so might as well hear her out.
“Well… since I’m still figuring out my arts, I had come up with a hypothesis of sort about its nature. Do you recalled that day when we all camped out, I accidentally sang aloud? The one where I ended waking up later than usual along with some of us?” She moved her face away from mine.
“Yes, I do remember about that…” I straighten myself to sit back up, she scowled a little. Most likely from the fact that I had gotten up from her lap but she decided not to pursue the matter.
“Yep, if my hypothesis is correct… it is less about my singing, and more about how I can affect my surrounding. Of course, that means a sense of harmony and attraction must be one of the prerequisite… in other words, the audience’s focus must have had an effect. Yet, I don’t know what constituted as an audience, is it everyone, just a select few, or is there something else?”
“… Interesting, but that means you, yourself, is an arts conduit with flexibility in terms of usage but limited to what kind of source you can draw yourself from…”
“Holy shit, I never thought of that… wait… then does that mean the humming or the song were… or not exactly the content, but the arts? Besides I’m not from here… did I perhaps messed up or something?”
‘What? Not from here? She’s self-absorbed with her own thoughts, and judging by her expression it was not a pleasant one.’
Her face shows her confliction on the matter, whatever it is must have been very sensitive and made her really uncomfortable… I will not sugarcoat it, she had done horrible things. Her remorse came late, that’s what I think anyway.
‘I know that face. I had seen a lot of people who mainly suffered an acute PTSD to be having this exact problem…’ Besides… her body starts shaking, and her breathing is getting rougher by the second.
And this woman has a really disappointing result of concealing her traumas from those who were allowed to see her true face and had experience in dealing with battlefield stress. It takes more than mental therapy to make someone who seen deaths daily to return into a normal civilian life, and she never even had said therapy from the looks of it.
How she would sometimes stared into nothing when we’re just taking breaks, or how her hand never strayed too far away from a weapon out in the field, then how her posture always has trace of wariness to the point of showing some easily missed reflexes, also how she has this withdrawn demeanor being masked with faux languidness, and etcetera.
“Song? Arts? Not from here? What are you implying here?”
Her body jerked and turned stiff, finally realizing that she’s not alone… and her face clearly displayed her worries. I instinctively reached out and hug her gently, I don’t know how much would that help… but I’ll try.
“N-no, no, no that was nothing. Haha…”
“… very well, just now that we- no I’m more than willing to listen.”
“… sorry.”
‘You have been apologizing a lot…’ Thankfully I didn’t voice it…
Seeing that it is futile, I decided to just move the conversation along. It won’t do much good for either of us to dwell on this matter, there is also the matter about her past that still eludes me… She is at least an Elder, that’s my own assessment, so she should have seen a lot of things.
“Don’t be, we all have our secrets… so are you still up for it?”
“Huh… o-oh… yeah, if you’re… um… stop being so close to me? I mean… uh… if you… want… to… I uh…” hold on, that was a gross misunderstanding.
“Sorry for that.”
“Yeah… um… thanks…”
I let go of her hand and it dawned on me of how uncouth that was. She is averting her eyes from me, and I must say that was indeed not an ideal method of calming her down. Despite everything and all her notoriety suggested, she is still a lady and that probably had been… a little too close for comfort.
“If you’re uncomfortable then…”
“N-No… it’s just… you know… Fuck… It’s getting awkward…” Her face is blushing and her speech manners has been impaired… She just sat there mumbling some nonsense too rapid for me to understand.
Her eyes then suddenly glinted with… bravado? Just what is wrong with this woman?
“Wellsinceitisyourbirthdayanywaysotohellwithit!”
She then pulled me to lay beside her… this couch is too small for the both of us, yet before I can protest, she starts singing…. And all goes black immediately…
End of flashback
“Hmm… guess that’s why I have this bipolar lady laying here with me… hopefully it doesn’t turned into some contrived scandals… more problems on her part, sadly…”
I slowly raised myself up from the couch, despite the positioning that would have suggested back cramps or discomfort and such… there were none, I feel more energized in fact. Feeling that I can search them with greater zeal does liven up my mood a notch or two.
Not long after, Nyx had woken up from her sleep. Her body rose up very languidly, although not the first time I seen her like this, she looks more refreshed this time around. Like a person who hadn’t sleep for years…
“Good morning.”
“G’mornin…. *Yawn*… where am I?”
“The lounge.”
“I see… I see… I… see? … WAIT WHAT!?”
“Easy there.” I chuckled a little, seeing blood rushing up her face, she then looked at me with… conflicting expression… She appears shocked that’s for sure, but there is also this uncertainty I detected from her.
She starts checking her body and glancing on mine before she exhaled with ease. Seeing that neither of us had any trace of indecency… which I would have much preferred it, if she doesn’t look so disappointed.
“I’ll go ahead, I have a tight schedule on my plate now.”
“Um… what will you do about… this?” She looked at me like… a third embarrassed, a third pleading, and a third… panicky?
“Of course, since it would be more troubling on you, I completely understand.” Whatever happened here won’t go out.
Her expression fell further… I really don’t understand this woman… what does she want really? Did I misspoke again? I suppose it would better to confirm her little experiment, lest things got awkward again.
“It appears that your experiment yesterday had some merits.”
“…experiment? Oh yeah! It was!”
“So what can you conclude at the moment?”
“Hmm… I can conclude that it does affect the both of us… but it seems that the mood and occasion had also affected the song. I’m one step closer to finally comprehend this arts of mine, for that… thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
“… And uh… I… never mind, sorry for holding you up…”
Numerous emotions had flitted around her face, she keeps her gaze on mine and mine on hers. Before she looked away, breaking both of us from the trance. Seeing that she would need more time with whatever she has in mind,
I suppose it is best for me to leave… and yet a sentence I desperately held back was reflexively uttered, we had been dancing along this matter for too long.
“I’m truly sorry, words are all I can spare but… Thank you for everything. I can’t accept anything more than this, not until I find them so please, look after yourself now. It’s not that I can’t accept your feelings, more like I have no idea how to make you happy without compromising my goal.”
That… was the harshest thing I said the first thing in the morning, her eyes gained a solemn gleam and she exhaled ever so slightly, nigh unnoticed even.
“… I understand.”
She smiled, her pinkish, amber tinted, eyes are full of understanding, but I can plainly see that her heart has been rend asunder. I’m starting to back away, the longer I linger the more baggage she would have to bury deep inside… my scheduled search has been postponed long enough as well.
Next year… yeah, when her contract will finally end… I’ll conclude our deal and agreement. Each passing of the day will only be a memory mired with bitterness for this girl otherwise.
I’m not the brightest person, nor am I the kindness… but even someone like me know that she deserves to be free.
“Hang on a second!” her voice starts cracking… desperation but also … joy? Can be felt clearly through her voice.
“… Yes?” Without meaning to, the sounds that comes out of my mouth was hoarse and bereft of vigor.
She fumbled the inside of her bag, not far from the couch, for a while before pulling out some kind of device. She immediately sat up and walked briskly my way, then hand it over to me. She let her palm linger on mine for a while, before withdrawing hers off.
I’m truly troubled… since it is a rather expensive, and a military grade to boot, communication device. This device no doubt brought her so many troubles to get… why go so far? It might sounds heartless and rude but… her infatuation had now crossed a line between adoration and obsession…
“… What do you want me to do with it?”
“I forgot an important thing… which I should have had said yesterday so… happy 23rd…” Tears starts falling from her eyes, but her smile is one of utmost sincerity and joy.
“… What am I going to do with you…?” I failed to realize that an apologetic smile already formed on my face.
“Please… it has an inbuilt tracker, map, and even drone interface… I had also registered you into its database, so no thievery there or else the assailant would get a nasty wakeup call… pretty amazing yeah? Hahaha… With this device help, you can find them faster… hopefully… and don’t worry about m-m-me, this was bought months ago. Just, you know… w-w-work and all that…” She put her hands behind her back, no doubt resisting the urge to wipe her tears.
“… Won’t it compromise you? They will surely know, I can’t cause you more… trouble…”
“…” This girl… she just smiled without saying nary a thing.
I contemplated about returning everything back to her, but that would only amount to an insult and me making light of her… love… This girl is truly something I can’t understand … normally people would be hurt after having their feelings goes unanswered for so long, and yet…
‘Forgive me but… no more, I have to be blunt now more than ever.’
“Why go so far for me? You know I only have one thing in mind for the foreseeable future right?”
“… O-o-of course… but… please… if only for you to… r-r-re-remember… a foolish girl’ selfishness… *sniff* and… her idiotic dre-… *sniff* no… her baseless… fantasy…”
“…”
“… *sniff* …” her face is facing everywhere but me…
“… I truly can’t understand you… but I can’t leave you empty handed after everything either… so this is all I have to return these affections of yours.”
‘For now…’ a part that was better left unsaid. The future is still a mystery, a bleak one too from the looks of it.
I walked closer upon her face and tucked away those locks of ashen hair that glimmered with silver light behind her… then wipe her tears away gently, cupping her jaw ever so gently… before giving a kiss upon this girl’ forehead…
… To say she was stunned was an understatement. Her unbridled joy was truly a sight to behold, but she finally locked her eyes on mine, she must have truly seen my resolute gaze… she starts to whimper even more, her whole being is shivering and yet she stifled the pain.
Her arms are shaking, no doubt trying to yank me down but she dare not to… It is best for me to leave now. Else her wound would fester into something that would damage and ravage her with falsified hope for an uncertain future… truly hypocritical of me to repeat myself…
With that I dragged my feet towards the door… I can finally hear her sobbing sounds coming from behind me, but I dare not to look back… I had inflicted so much after all, no longer do I deserve to what’s so close but also nigh unreachable…
As much as I want to comfort her, Schnitz and Yolanta are my only priority… they far outweigh anything in this world, even Margaret, Maria, my Father… then this stubborn, boneheaded, and… affectionate girl… combined.
That’s how much those two meant for my pitiful self and I just added another strike on my streak of selfishness… Sorry Nyx, the future is untenable… the present is not welcoming… and the past is clawing its way onto me, just a matter of time.
When I reached upon the doorway, I have someone waiting for me. There stands Zofia, her face hold no emotion, but it is all too clear for me about how disappointed she is. She is younger than me, but her judgmental eyes does pricked me deep inside.
“… Grats on your little celebration, our steadfast Wandering Hero… I hope you can find them, I truly am. Now go, don’t waste your time standing there like a buffoon any longer.” Zofia with a tray of food in her hand said nothing else and brushed past me. At least… she can comfort the heartbroken girl in the room.
This cousin of mine has matured quickly too, just like Margaret who delved more seriously into statecraft and knightly matters while I’m having a hard time picturing anything else than my brother and sister-in-law.
“It’s time to go…”
POV: Zofia
‘What must I do now? Should I just told big sis to rest up and just do something else? She would most likely pushed back on that request, she would argue about still needing to train us…’
That is the only string of words swirling in my mind. I was actually intending to tease them a little… not to be given a first row in a really rushed love drama… That damn cousin of mine is gone now, I know that he just wanted for big sis to be free once more, not chained down with his responsibility.
But that was such a gross way to spell it out, crush her heart and leave. Effective, efficient, honest, and absurdly cruel… Big sis is now just sitting on the couch. When she sees me, she gazed downward… her sobbing stops but her tears continue…
‘Feels like she just sat there between daze, hurt, puzzlement, shame, and… ugh to hell with this!’
Before I can say anything however, she raised her head with a smile… her smile was… adorably pure… She then look back at me warmly… uh… what happened? Is this what people called coping with the pain? This is a tad frightening.
“Big sis… are you alright?”
“How silly! Of course not!”
My mind failed to comprehend her words. Hold on, are we even speaking the same language?
‘Ok, why are you smiling so proudly now!? Was the sadness so bad you go full circle!?’
“Uh?”
“But that’s just so like him… makes me smitten with him all the more… You know why?”
“… Um… no?”
“Because I’m a hopeless girl… besides… didn’t you see how he kissed my forehead!? I was about to faint from it you know!? Fufufufu~”
Um… what? If she was madly in love before, then she is truly a hopeless and idiotic maiden, with flowers filling her brain to the brim, right now… Romance novel that I had read does had an absurd plot like this every now and then, and that’s fine and all but to see it actually played out in real life? I’m concerned at best…
“Hah… but you’re mistaken, really. I’m sad yes, but when I comprehend his words again… he never said anything about rejecting me… only explaining in a roundabout manner about the time being inappropriate, that’s all~”
Big sis… your optimism is admirable…Soooo… I can only smile? Um… yeah I guess? Why am I second guessing myself? This is weird… but whatever rocks her boat, I’m here to deliver her breakfast anyway, besides the other thing.
“Oh! Is that for me? My, you learned quickly.”
“Of course I am. Especially with Margaret still as hopeless as ever, Maria being too young, that blockhead rarely at home, then uncle’s condition can worsen abruptly, and… you will leave eventually… hah… guess I’ll be working twice if not thrice as hard, but that’s alright. This family treated me like their own child after all…”
“You matured really quickly, a shame that I just lost one of my reason to just spoil and cuddle you up…”
“Should I be concerned?”
“Dear, you’re still as cute as a button. I wonder if someday I’ll have a cute but responsible kid like you… nah, not gonna happen! My child would be a menace to society… as long as they do not do anything stupid, I can live with that.”
“…”
While I’m contemplating about what she just said, big sis starts eating her breakfast with a gusto, I wonder why can she recover so quickly?
“Um… Big sis?”
“mmyeaaaaah, lil sis?”
“How can you… act so nonchalant, despite what had happened?”
She stopped eating her breakfast, and I can see that her eyes shook… seem like that was something I shouldn’t have touch… Good work Zofia, you no longer have the rights to call that blockhead insensitive.
“Sorry… I shouldn’t ask you something like tha-”
“Because it’s not the first time…” a melancholic yet hopeful voice resonated deeply from her voice.
“… huh?”
“Zofia, I had more or less, quote on quote, died more than once.”
“… What’s that supposed to mean? Sorry I don’t understand…”
“Hmm… how about I give you a little story of my life instead? Would you care to listen?”
I can only nod my head, she smiled at me. Before continuing on…
“I had been called various variants of colorful, impressionable, names… I had been stabbed in the back numerous times… I had been humiliated and degraded countless times… and I had known how painful it is to suffer for a long, long, time… but that’s exactly why, even briefly, I always try to enjoy the good in the world… even if it’s only the size of a morning dew by comparison…”
“…”
“You know, someone told me that when all you can see is hate, suffering, pain, and death… it will make you go mad with insanity… but then what would happened if you have been through so much pain and little good? You will hate the world, you will curse the god, and you will denounce fate. Then taking it further, what can you see after all that? Nothing, only a blank painted hall… full of suffocating emptiness.”
“Emptiness?”
“Well yeah, and… despite what I had said about being positive and stuff… this idiotic self of mine had lapsed there every now and then… how I would be burning with negative emotions, how I would feel envy for something that’s in hindsight was caused by no one but me… but with some good deeds and actions in the world, no matter how hypocritical… I managed.”
I’m trying to wrap my head around her words, they can be understood from literal sense, but surely it is anything but… Is she an Elder race? Or is she talking in metaphorical sense?
“Which is why… every joyous occasion, which can be felt through the bleak lens of life, is precious… I had seen places destroyed, people died, and all sort of horrors… and yet all of those can still be remedied by seeing children playing and learning… old couples giving home trinkets… and the downtrodden to live like a human with pride…”
She then smiled again, a serene smile. Her optimism is not something replicable for me.
“Besides, my lovely blockhead still gives me more chances~. Oh right! Our dinner date yesterday was great!”
And she changed the topic again…
“… Big sis, how does your mind work exactly? This sounds… concerning, at best…”
“Hmm… If I can word it with my own words… then… let’s say that I can be quite the patient type if I’m stubborn enough… it will work out, that’s what I think anyway. Oh~ this salad is tasty.”
“… If it didn’t?”
“I’ll cry, again! Then I’ll try, again, of course!”
“…”
I give up, big sis’ mind is beyond my comprehension… hopefully that she is actually fine for the most part. The last thing this family need is more people acting out their roles… and not being themselves… Maria is my only hope for someone to act normally at this point.
‘What a day, Zofia… What a day… well I better say one thing however…’
“Big sis?”
“Lil sis?”
I mustered my sincerest and brightest smile.
“You’re an idiot.”
“Why thank you!”
"... That was not a compliment, I'm afraid..."
“Wait, that wasn’t?”
“… Haaaahhhhhhhhh…”
Date: 17th November 1083
Location: Somewhere Kawalerielki, Kazimierz
POV: Nyx.
A woman in her prime of 20’s can be seen to be fighting against 2 girls, one with a heavier apparel in lieu of armor and armed with a mace while the other armed with a sword and wearing only a breastplate. They had been going back and forth for the last few hours, yet none shows a significant level of fatigue.
“Focus! Zofia, don’t slack off!”
“Yes, Ma’am!”
“Margaret, eyes on me! Don’t even take your vision away mid combat!”
“Understood!”
With renewed vigor, the knight apprentices are attacking with coordinated movement. When Zofia was caught out of position, Margaret would cover for her until she regained her posture. Margaret in return would receive more opportunity for an opening to deliver a blow.
But their teacher is none other than the Grey Serpent. A monster specialized to seek and destroy her target. Nyx is relentless in beating and grinding their confidence to a pulp, her current target. That way they won’t despair when they fell at their lowest point and instead learn more diligently.
“Remember, you can temper yourself past the limit! All depends on how much you dare to!”
“YES! / UNDERSTOOD!”
40 minutes later…
The 2 soon-to-be knightess are left panting on the floor, the last half hour or so was the most difficult one so far. Margaret can feel her muscle screaming from overexertion while Zofia is just down on her knees and panting wildly.
“… Hah… what did I told you? This training portion wasn’t mean for kids.”
“But!”
“No buts, you’re still too young. It will hamper if not outright stunt your growth if you keep being so stubborn like this… or do you need me to give me another lecture of why backbreaking training can have serious effect?”
“…”
“…”
“No is still no, young ladies! I will not compromise your growth with some misguided needs to grow unattended. The only thing after enforcing yourselves on a harsher training would be a long list of long-term consequences.”
Margaret and Zofia didn’t budge and they instead glared at their teacher. Nyx is at a complete lost with how desperate they have become in training. Margaret in particular had gotten more restless than usual.
Well it is not without reason since Nyx will be leaving soon in preparation for New Year’s Eve in Toron. Vincent had given her the message, a message that she has been waiting for months now. Thus they squeeze out anything they can learn while Nyx is still here for them and then for another year after returning from Victoria.
“… How long are you going to keep standing there Mwi?”
“Just passing by…”
“… Class dismissed.”
The 2 girls left the room obediently albeit with some dissatisfactions, now Nyx turn her face to look at Młynar. She can see that his mental state is stable but also deteriorating from how despondent he look. The last months had been torturous for herself, seeing the man she loves keeps losing a part of himself had a negative effect on her.
“Still the same?”
“Yeah… also… is that true?”
"Mm-hmm... I'll be leaving for Victoria soon... Vincent had finally gotten his end of the bargain after months... But if you need m-"
"No, even though I had asked of you to safeguard the family, you should still prioritize yourself... besides, it just feels wrong to deny you of your own hard work."
“… Right… Take care of yourself…else, I’ll drag you to hell if I found proof of a certain blonde man who keeps pushing himself…”
“No promise.”
“Hmph, figured you’ll say that… fucking blockhead…” despite her vulgar words, a melancholic smile graced her face.
“Before you go, I have something for you.”
Młynar presented a sword for her, the sword looks plain but looks can be deceiving.
“…You don’t have to…”
“Nonsense, consider it my gift to you… the blade emphasized more on durability.”
“Heh… Thanks…” She fastened the blade on her hip, and then cupped the man she adored so much.
“Until we meet again…”
“Likewise.” Młynar then left the room, he will need to rest. The search for Schnitz and Yolanta had been going on a standstill, but he won’t give up.
Seeing that he has vacated himself from the room, Nyx pulled her personal terminal out to re-read the message Vincent sent her.
[Nyx, your doctor will be attending the New Year’s Eve in my mansion this end of the year. She is a trustworthy woman and you’ll get whatever answers or objectives you’re always looking for. She can spare her time this year and the next 3 months only, in all honesty she is a busy woman and it is up to you at this point.]
“… Toron, here I come…”
[END OF CHAPTER]
Author’s Note:
Yo there, this is me, myself, and I, the author who doesn’t know how love work.
Wait, how does it work anyway? I'm serious here, because I keep hearing people and reading quotes along the line that "love is blind", "all is fair in love and war", and all those sophisticated stuff, which is why... I'm kinda lost, honestly speaking.
We’re back to Victoria, and those who know will know what transpired there.
Update as usual, I need to go sleep.
Ciao
"Mono/Dialogue"
'Inner thoughts'
Narration
[Message/communication apparatus]
Date: Data not found
Location: Data not found
POV: Narrator
The debacle that caused the major disruption should have caused Nyx to suffer a lot of consequences… but because of unprecedented amount of investment and popularity her little improvisation brought to the table, K.G.C.C. was forced to just give her a stern warning…
Then again she still comply with her contract of making the Major more popular…
It didn’t end there, Kazimierz now have 2 major nationwide, and even international, sensations. Degenbrecher stunning victory during Kazimierz Major on her first try, and Nyx’ siren-like singing performance. The former was due to how powerful she is, while the latter was due to how unexpected it is. Nyx was always known to be a ruthless mercenary… not a charming and dazzling singer with hypnotizing voice…
On a completely, definitely, unrelated note, Kazimierz’s social media had a sudden resurge of Higashinese terminology called Gap-moe. The reason is something that, to this very day, cannot be comprehended. Yeah, definitely…
Back to the topic…
Degenbrecher has been officially granted the Grand Knight title with her moniker as “The” Black Knight due to how unwavering and utterly fearsome she is in combat, unlike grand knights before her. She is still in the process of creating her own Knight Order, but potential applicants had reached thousands both from inside and outside of Kawalerielki.
Nyx is also having the greatest headache of her life, her fanbase practically multiplied itself to the point that she now has her own fanatics in the thousands. She is also being hounded by entertainment agencies left and right, for another obvious reason, but it was quite entertaining how a single photo of her genuinely smiling had lit the entertainment sphere on fire.
Several leaks had also spread where Degenbrecher was seen having the time of her life partying up and for Nyx to be in what appears to be a dinner date. Their respective fanbase were thrilled and dismayed, respectively, with these leaks, but it is not like either of them care anyway.
Not to mention that to even entertain harming either of them would resulted of them being turned into a pretzel, on a good day. So these fanboys and fangirls can only curse these lucky fellows seen in the leaks, while the more rabid one starts hunting them, with predictable result…
Now, the Grey Serpent got herself another moniker, the Silver Siren. Partly due to a lot of people now doubting her true race to be anything but ordinary Pythian, partly again because her voice was truly intoxicating for their ears, like a siren’ invitation in myth, and mostly because it rolled off the tongue better by the end of the day.
Another important piece of information, Degenbrecher had received substantial backing from several chairmen while Nyx had finally shed her neutrality to side with… the Nearl Family. Her reception with the 3 factions are all professional and businesslike, but she will always takes the Nearl’ side 10 / 10 times.
No one knows why Nyx sided with a failing family, thus the repercussions are minimal. It is only a matter of time before the Nearl fade into obscurity… or is it?
Date: 4th December 1082
Location: Nearl’s Mansion, Kawalerielki, Kazimierz
POV: Zofia
“Alright! This time, I’ll cook breakfast, no way big sis is awake at the moment! Hehe~ I’ll also show Mar that I’m a dependable older sister!” I said to no one in particular while skipping down the staircase towards the kitchen, still…
Big sis actually returned home after strong-arming Młynar to stay for a bit longer, don’t know for what though. He hadn’t left the Nearl’s Mansion for 3 days now… but I wonder where those two are right now since their respective bedroom is opened and empty.
Also I have a much more personal reasoning…
“Why did Mar called me auntie these days!? That was so embarrassing… it also made me feel old! Hmph! I’ll show her that I’m no old hag.” Why am I so annoyed when someone called me auntie? Whatever, I’ll think about it later.
“Hmm? The door to the lounge is ajar? I wonder who’s in it, couldn’t be Mar or Maria, that’s for sure… Might as well check it out.” I slinked towards the door carefully, and the view that I saw almost made me squeal in delight and joy.
I see Big Sis and that blockheaded cousin of mine cuddling on the sofa! Big sis really tucked herself comfortably into his arms, while that insensitive blockhead seems to be cradling her in a protective embrace…
Aww… The face of bliss and contentment on her face is so adorably cute… the blockhead face is still scowling but that’s just how he is… wait… a corner of his mouth is curled upward a little… I knew it, while he is indeed an almost irredeemable blockhead, at least he is aware of her feelings. Oh wait! I can use this~
“Hehe… where is my PT… aha there it is… hehehe.” I got dirt on Big Sis and Młynar now, with this I can finally force her to up her training while making that blockhead to finally make good of his promise! My career as a powerful, respected, knight will soon be upon my grasp and I can finally become a good… um… what was the term again? Something about wing… meh
“*cough* *cough*”
My body gone stiff all of a sudden, I was so focused on seeing them that neglected my guard. Turning around I can see Uncle Kiril is looking at me in puzzlement… wait, he was unable to move, was it not!? Why is he here!?
“U-u-uncle! You shouldn’t be straining yourself! Why are you out of your bed without telling anyone!?” I whispered a bit louder than I intended too, luckily those two are still blissfully sleeping without much care.
“Goodness me. *cough* I had a sudden urge to walk around, not to mention that my vigor had recovered somewhat… *cough*… Can’t just lay down like a potato or a hibernating burdenbeasts every day now, can’t I?”
“B-b-but your afflic-”
“Zofia… I’m fine *cough* *cough* besides… why are you here? You’re usually competing with Nyx for the chance of making breakfast, from what Margaret told me from time to time anyway.” He chuckled a little, but I want to see what he’ll think about this.
“Well… yes… I should have. But you see! I’m currently looking at something really interesting inside the lounge!”
“Truly? What is it?”
“It would be better if you take a look at it yourself.”
Uncle Kiril unsteadily walked towards the door, his constitution is unlike what it once was… he is limping, his back is a tad hunched, his breathing is on the rougher side, and his blond hair had turned white here and there… I know I shouldn’t talk about it… but the day when he returned with a completely exhausted figure and expression had carved itself deep in my mind.
I can only imagine what Margaret, Maria, and Młynar felt back then…
Uncle finally made it to the door and he gasped quietly, before his face turned into a smile. He said nothing and left them alone, he turned his head to me and say what is on his mind to me.
“Zofia, let them rest… *cough* cough* we have 2 stubborn people now… haha…” Uncle then left the hallway, he is going back upstairs to rest up again.
“Yes, uncle.”
I understand since big sis was a real busybody once she knows we need something she would do it without being asked to, even when she just arrived from her own work. There was that one time she barged into a postal office because we got sent what was in all honesty death threats, let’s just say her furious face is putting it lightly.
At this moment, everyone knows that big sis is aligned with us. Not with the Adeptus, not K.A, and not K.G.C.C. she made it abundantly clear, she still received jobs regarding mercenary works. But now she focused most of her time for taking care of us.
Then the more recent one like yesterday when I offhandedly remarked that there is problem with some things like winter supplies. Big sis just told me to go sleep and immediately go outside herself… at 11 P.M…
I know that she is really overprotective… but it feels like she worked herself for us like a servant. That’s also the reason why I’m getting up earlier these days, she won’t budge when being told to look for herself first.
You know it is funny when she always complained that the Nearls are all so stubborn, while she herself is not so different… Maybe that’s one of the reason why she was already accepted into the family. Honestly, this family is really made up of stubborn people.
Now if only a certain someone can coax her to stop being so stubborn, to take things easier and not acting like it is the end of the world every 5 minutes or so.
Big sis always said that she has plenty of chance for lazing around in her apartment, thus her work hour’s ethics is always a 1/1 copy to being outright workaholic.
Well enough of that, it is my turn to show my dependability!
‘Hmm~ hmm~ I’m one going to show them what I’m made of! Here comes Zofia, a soon to be famous and dependable knightess!’
Guess it is time for me to show off my culinary arts! Big sis’ teaching and training worked tremendously well! Margaret was really jealous that I can cooked so well, so I’ll awe her with my culinary arts to finally force her to call me big sis. My plan is foolproof!
POV: Młynar
“…” I stirred awake from my sleep… last night was probably the first time I can rest so relaxed and eased off my mental exhaustion. I felt… odd, however. Like something is on top of my right arm, it doesn’t feel heavy or discomforting however. Then I moved my eyes towards the source…
“...Nyx?” It was quite a startling sight, she was never this bold before… internally panicking I look on ourselves that, thankfully, the both of us are still clothed. I’m having a headache of how did this happened… I tried to remember what happened yesterday, and I succeed.
She said that since yesterday was my birthday, an event I always neglect since it is pointless, I got strong-armed to rest, one way or another. I was really exhausted but she was humming a soothing melody that reinvigorate my nerves. Her surprise singing last year seems to solidify some insights on her natural arts construct.
While at it she gave me a proposition…
Flashback
“Hey Mwi, can you help me out with something?” I’m currently laying my head on her lap, it was relaxing and comforting experience… it happened regularly every time she ambushed me on the way home from another taxing search and investigation. In short, she forced me to comply, and I somehow having a hard time saying no.
“Sure.” I have nothing to do at the moment, courtesy of this one, so might as well hear her out.
“Well… since I’m still figuring out my arts, I had come up with a hypothesis of sort about its nature. Do you recalled that day when we all camped out, I accidentally sang aloud? The one where I ended waking up later than usual along with some of us?” She moved her face away from mine.
“Yes, I do remember about that…” I straighten myself to sit back up, she scowled a little. Most likely from the fact that I had gotten up from her lap but she decided not to pursue the matter.
“Yep, if my hypothesis is correct… it is less about my singing, and more about how I can affect my surrounding. Of course, that means a sense of harmony and attraction must be one of the prerequisite… in other words, the audience’s focus must have had an effect. Yet, I don’t know what constituted as an audience, is it everyone, just a select few, or is there something else?”
“… Interesting, but that means you, yourself, is an arts conduit with flexibility in terms of usage but limited to what kind of source you can draw yourself from…”
“Holy shit, I never thought of that… wait… then does that mean the humming or the song were… or not exactly the content, but the arts? Besides I’m not from here… did I perhaps messed up or something?”
‘What? Not from here? She’s self-absorbed with her own thoughts, and judging by her expression it was not a pleasant one.’
Her face shows her confliction on the matter, whatever it is must have been very sensitive and made her really uncomfortable… I will not sugarcoat it, she had done horrible things. Her remorse came late, that’s what I think anyway.
‘I know that face. I had seen a lot of people who mainly suffered an acute PTSD to be having this exact problem…’ Besides… her body starts shaking, and her breathing is getting rougher by the second.
And this woman has a really disappointing result of concealing her traumas from those who were allowed to see her true face and had experience in dealing with battlefield stress. It takes more than mental therapy to make someone who seen deaths daily to return into a normal civilian life, and she never even had said therapy from the looks of it.
How she would sometimes stared into nothing when we’re just taking breaks, or how her hand never strayed too far away from a weapon out in the field, then how her posture always has trace of wariness to the point of showing some easily missed reflexes, also how she has this withdrawn demeanor being masked with faux languidness, and etcetera.
“Song? Arts? Not from here? What are you implying here?”
Her body jerked and turned stiff, finally realizing that she’s not alone… and her face clearly displayed her worries. I instinctively reached out and hug her gently, I don’t know how much would that help… but I’ll try.
“N-no, no, no that was nothing. Haha…”
“… very well, just now that we- no I’m more than willing to listen.”
“… sorry.”
‘You have been apologizing a lot…’ Thankfully I didn’t voice it…
Seeing that it is futile, I decided to just move the conversation along. It won’t do much good for either of us to dwell on this matter, there is also the matter about her past that still eludes me… She is at least an Elder, that’s my own assessment, so she should have seen a lot of things.
“Don’t be, we all have our secrets… so are you still up for it?”
“Huh… o-oh… yeah, if you’re… um… stop being so close to me? I mean… uh… if you… want… to… I uh…” hold on, that was a gross misunderstanding.
“Sorry for that.”
“Yeah… um… thanks…”
I let go of her hand and it dawned on me of how uncouth that was. She is averting her eyes from me, and I must say that was indeed not an ideal method of calming her down. Despite everything and all her notoriety suggested, she is still a lady and that probably had been… a little too close for comfort.
“If you’re uncomfortable then…”
“N-No… it’s just… you know… Fuck… It’s getting awkward…” Her face is blushing and her speech manners has been impaired… She just sat there mumbling some nonsense too rapid for me to understand.
Her eyes then suddenly glinted with… bravado? Just what is wrong with this woman?
“Wellsinceitisyourbirthdayanywaysotohellwithit!”
She then pulled me to lay beside her… this couch is too small for the both of us, yet before I can protest, she starts singing…. And all goes black immediately…
End of flashback
“Hmm… guess that’s why I have this bipolar lady laying here with me… hopefully it doesn’t turned into some contrived scandals… more problems on her part, sadly…”
I slowly raised myself up from the couch, despite the positioning that would have suggested back cramps or discomfort and such… there were none, I feel more energized in fact. Feeling that I can search them with greater zeal does liven up my mood a notch or two.
Not long after, Nyx had woken up from her sleep. Her body rose up very languidly, although not the first time I seen her like this, she looks more refreshed this time around. Like a person who hadn’t sleep for years…
“Good morning.”
“G’mornin…. *Yawn*… where am I?”
“The lounge.”
“I see… I see… I… see? … WAIT WHAT!?”
“Easy there.” I chuckled a little, seeing blood rushing up her face, she then looked at me with… conflicting expression… She appears shocked that’s for sure, but there is also this uncertainty I detected from her.
She starts checking her body and glancing on mine before she exhaled with ease. Seeing that neither of us had any trace of indecency… which I would have much preferred it, if she doesn’t look so disappointed.
“I’ll go ahead, I have a tight schedule on my plate now.”
“Um… what will you do about… this?” She looked at me like… a third embarrassed, a third pleading, and a third… panicky?
“Of course, since it would be more troubling on you, I completely understand.” Whatever happened here won’t go out.
Her expression fell further… I really don’t understand this woman… what does she want really? Did I misspoke again? I suppose it would better to confirm her little experiment, lest things got awkward again.
“It appears that your experiment yesterday had some merits.”
“…experiment? Oh yeah! It was!”
“So what can you conclude at the moment?”
“Hmm… I can conclude that it does affect the both of us… but it seems that the mood and occasion had also affected the song. I’m one step closer to finally comprehend this arts of mine, for that… thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.”
“… And uh… I… never mind, sorry for holding you up…”
Numerous emotions had flitted around her face, she keeps her gaze on mine and mine on hers. Before she looked away, breaking both of us from the trance. Seeing that she would need more time with whatever she has in mind,
I suppose it is best for me to leave… and yet a sentence I desperately held back was reflexively uttered, we had been dancing along this matter for too long.
“I’m truly sorry, words are all I can spare but… Thank you for everything. I can’t accept anything more than this, not until I find them so please, look after yourself now. It’s not that I can’t accept your feelings, more like I have no idea how to make you happy without compromising my goal.”
That… was the harshest thing I said the first thing in the morning, her eyes gained a solemn gleam and she exhaled ever so slightly, nigh unnoticed even.
“… I understand.”
She smiled, her pinkish, amber tinted, eyes are full of understanding, but I can plainly see that her heart has been rend asunder. I’m starting to back away, the longer I linger the more baggage she would have to bury deep inside… my scheduled search has been postponed long enough as well.
Next year… yeah, when her contract will finally end… I’ll conclude our deal and agreement. Each passing of the day will only be a memory mired with bitterness for this girl otherwise.
I’m not the brightest person, nor am I the kindness… but even someone like me know that she deserves to be free.
“Hang on a second!” her voice starts cracking… desperation but also … joy? Can be felt clearly through her voice.
“… Yes?” Without meaning to, the sounds that comes out of my mouth was hoarse and bereft of vigor.
She fumbled the inside of her bag, not far from the couch, for a while before pulling out some kind of device. She immediately sat up and walked briskly my way, then hand it over to me. She let her palm linger on mine for a while, before withdrawing hers off.
I’m truly troubled… since it is a rather expensive, and a military grade to boot, communication device. This device no doubt brought her so many troubles to get… why go so far? It might sounds heartless and rude but… her infatuation had now crossed a line between adoration and obsession…
“… What do you want me to do with it?”
“I forgot an important thing… which I should have had said yesterday so… happy 23rd…” Tears starts falling from her eyes, but her smile is one of utmost sincerity and joy.
“… What am I going to do with you…?” I failed to realize that an apologetic smile already formed on my face.
“Please… it has an inbuilt tracker, map, and even drone interface… I had also registered you into its database, so no thievery there or else the assailant would get a nasty wakeup call… pretty amazing yeah? Hahaha… With this device help, you can find them faster… hopefully… and don’t worry about m-m-me, this was bought months ago. Just, you know… w-w-work and all that…” She put her hands behind her back, no doubt resisting the urge to wipe her tears.
“… Won’t it compromise you? They will surely know, I can’t cause you more… trouble…”
“…” This girl… she just smiled without saying nary a thing.
I contemplated about returning everything back to her, but that would only amount to an insult and me making light of her… love… This girl is truly something I can’t understand … normally people would be hurt after having their feelings goes unanswered for so long, and yet…
‘Forgive me but… no more, I have to be blunt now more than ever.’
“Why go so far for me? You know I only have one thing in mind for the foreseeable future right?”
“… O-o-of course… but… please… if only for you to… r-r-re-remember… a foolish girl’ selfishness… *sniff* and… her idiotic dre-… *sniff* no… her baseless… fantasy…”
“…”
“… *sniff* …” her face is facing everywhere but me…
“… I truly can’t understand you… but I can’t leave you empty handed after everything either… so this is all I have to return these affections of yours.”
‘For now…’ a part that was better left unsaid. The future is still a mystery, a bleak one too from the looks of it.
I walked closer upon her face and tucked away those locks of ashen hair that glimmered with silver light behind her… then wipe her tears away gently, cupping her jaw ever so gently… before giving a kiss upon this girl’ forehead…
… To say she was stunned was an understatement. Her unbridled joy was truly a sight to behold, but she finally locked her eyes on mine, she must have truly seen my resolute gaze… she starts to whimper even more, her whole being is shivering and yet she stifled the pain.
Her arms are shaking, no doubt trying to yank me down but she dare not to… It is best for me to leave now. Else her wound would fester into something that would damage and ravage her with falsified hope for an uncertain future… truly hypocritical of me to repeat myself…
With that I dragged my feet towards the door… I can finally hear her sobbing sounds coming from behind me, but I dare not to look back… I had inflicted so much after all, no longer do I deserve to what’s so close but also nigh unreachable…
As much as I want to comfort her, Schnitz and Yolanta are my only priority… they far outweigh anything in this world, even Margaret, Maria, my Father… then this stubborn, boneheaded, and… affectionate girl… combined.
That’s how much those two meant for my pitiful self and I just added another strike on my streak of selfishness… Sorry Nyx, the future is untenable… the present is not welcoming… and the past is clawing its way onto me, just a matter of time.
When I reached upon the doorway, I have someone waiting for me. There stands Zofia, her face hold no emotion, but it is all too clear for me about how disappointed she is. She is younger than me, but her judgmental eyes does pricked me deep inside.
“… Grats on your little celebration, our steadfast Wandering Hero… I hope you can find them, I truly am. Now go, don’t waste your time standing there like a buffoon any longer.” Zofia with a tray of food in her hand said nothing else and brushed past me. At least… she can comfort the heartbroken girl in the room.
This cousin of mine has matured quickly too, just like Margaret who delved more seriously into statecraft and knightly matters while I’m having a hard time picturing anything else than my brother and sister-in-law.
“It’s time to go…”
POV: Zofia
‘What must I do now? Should I just told big sis to rest up and just do something else? She would most likely pushed back on that request, she would argue about still needing to train us…’
That is the only string of words swirling in my mind. I was actually intending to tease them a little… not to be given a first row in a really rushed love drama… That damn cousin of mine is gone now, I know that he just wanted for big sis to be free once more, not chained down with his responsibility.
But that was such a gross way to spell it out, crush her heart and leave. Effective, efficient, honest, and absurdly cruel… Big sis is now just sitting on the couch. When she sees me, she gazed downward… her sobbing stops but her tears continue…
‘Feels like she just sat there between daze, hurt, puzzlement, shame, and… ugh to hell with this!’
Before I can say anything however, she raised her head with a smile… her smile was… adorably pure… She then look back at me warmly… uh… what happened? Is this what people called coping with the pain? This is a tad frightening.
“Big sis… are you alright?”
“How silly! Of course not!”
My mind failed to comprehend her words. Hold on, are we even speaking the same language?
‘Ok, why are you smiling so proudly now!? Was the sadness so bad you go full circle!?’
“Uh?”
“But that’s just so like him… makes me smitten with him all the more… You know why?”
“… Um… no?”
“Because I’m a hopeless girl… besides… didn’t you see how he kissed my forehead!? I was about to faint from it you know!? Fufufufu~”
Um… what? If she was madly in love before, then she is truly a hopeless and idiotic maiden, with flowers filling her brain to the brim, right now… Romance novel that I had read does had an absurd plot like this every now and then, and that’s fine and all but to see it actually played out in real life? I’m concerned at best…
“Hah… but you’re mistaken, really. I’m sad yes, but when I comprehend his words again… he never said anything about rejecting me… only explaining in a roundabout manner about the time being inappropriate, that’s all~”
Big sis… your optimism is admirable…Soooo… I can only smile? Um… yeah I guess? Why am I second guessing myself? This is weird… but whatever rocks her boat, I’m here to deliver her breakfast anyway, besides the other thing.
“Oh! Is that for me? My, you learned quickly.”
“Of course I am. Especially with Margaret still as hopeless as ever, Maria being too young, that blockhead rarely at home, then uncle’s condition can worsen abruptly, and… you will leave eventually… hah… guess I’ll be working twice if not thrice as hard, but that’s alright. This family treated me like their own child after all…”
“You matured really quickly, a shame that I just lost one of my reason to just spoil and cuddle you up…”
“Should I be concerned?”
“Dear, you’re still as cute as a button. I wonder if someday I’ll have a cute but responsible kid like you… nah, not gonna happen! My child would be a menace to society… as long as they do not do anything stupid, I can live with that.”
“…”
While I’m contemplating about what she just said, big sis starts eating her breakfast with a gusto, I wonder why can she recover so quickly?
“Um… Big sis?”
“mmyeaaaaah, lil sis?”
“How can you… act so nonchalant, despite what had happened?”
She stopped eating her breakfast, and I can see that her eyes shook… seem like that was something I shouldn’t have touch… Good work Zofia, you no longer have the rights to call that blockhead insensitive.
“Sorry… I shouldn’t ask you something like tha-”
“Because it’s not the first time…” a melancholic yet hopeful voice resonated deeply from her voice.
“… huh?”
“Zofia, I had more or less, quote on quote, died more than once.”
“… What’s that supposed to mean? Sorry I don’t understand…”
“Hmm… how about I give you a little story of my life instead? Would you care to listen?”
I can only nod my head, she smiled at me. Before continuing on…
“I had been called various variants of colorful, impressionable, names… I had been stabbed in the back numerous times… I had been humiliated and degraded countless times… and I had known how painful it is to suffer for a long, long, time… but that’s exactly why, even briefly, I always try to enjoy the good in the world… even if it’s only the size of a morning dew by comparison…”
“…”
“You know, someone told me that when all you can see is hate, suffering, pain, and death… it will make you go mad with insanity… but then what would happened if you have been through so much pain and little good? You will hate the world, you will curse the god, and you will denounce fate. Then taking it further, what can you see after all that? Nothing, only a blank painted hall… full of suffocating emptiness.”
“Emptiness?”
“Well yeah, and… despite what I had said about being positive and stuff… this idiotic self of mine had lapsed there every now and then… how I would be burning with negative emotions, how I would feel envy for something that’s in hindsight was caused by no one but me… but with some good deeds and actions in the world, no matter how hypocritical… I managed.”
I’m trying to wrap my head around her words, they can be understood from literal sense, but surely it is anything but… Is she an Elder race? Or is she talking in metaphorical sense?
“Which is why… every joyous occasion, which can be felt through the bleak lens of life, is precious… I had seen places destroyed, people died, and all sort of horrors… and yet all of those can still be remedied by seeing children playing and learning… old couples giving home trinkets… and the downtrodden to live like a human with pride…”
She then smiled again, a serene smile. Her optimism is not something replicable for me.
“Besides, my lovely blockhead still gives me more chances~. Oh right! Our dinner date yesterday was great!”
And she changed the topic again…
“… Big sis, how does your mind work exactly? This sounds… concerning, at best…”
“Hmm… If I can word it with my own words… then… let’s say that I can be quite the patient type if I’m stubborn enough… it will work out, that’s what I think anyway. Oh~ this salad is tasty.”
“… If it didn’t?”
“I’ll cry, again! Then I’ll try, again, of course!”
“…”
I give up, big sis’ mind is beyond my comprehension… hopefully that she is actually fine for the most part. The last thing this family need is more people acting out their roles… and not being themselves… Maria is my only hope for someone to act normally at this point.
‘What a day, Zofia… What a day… well I better say one thing however…’
“Big sis?”
“Lil sis?”
I mustered my sincerest and brightest smile.
“You’re an idiot.”
“Why thank you!”
"... That was not a compliment, I'm afraid..."
“Wait, that wasn’t?”
“… Haaaahhhhhhhhh…”
Date: 17th November 1083
Location: Somewhere Kawalerielki, Kazimierz
POV: Nyx.
A woman in her prime of 20’s can be seen to be fighting against 2 girls, one with a heavier apparel in lieu of armor and armed with a mace while the other armed with a sword and wearing only a breastplate. They had been going back and forth for the last few hours, yet none shows a significant level of fatigue.
“Focus! Zofia, don’t slack off!”
“Yes, Ma’am!”
“Margaret, eyes on me! Don’t even take your vision away mid combat!”
“Understood!”
With renewed vigor, the knight apprentices are attacking with coordinated movement. When Zofia was caught out of position, Margaret would cover for her until she regained her posture. Margaret in return would receive more opportunity for an opening to deliver a blow.
But their teacher is none other than the Grey Serpent. A monster specialized to seek and destroy her target. Nyx is relentless in beating and grinding their confidence to a pulp, her current target. That way they won’t despair when they fell at their lowest point and instead learn more diligently.
“Remember, you can temper yourself past the limit! All depends on how much you dare to!”
“YES! / UNDERSTOOD!”
40 minutes later…
The 2 soon-to-be knightess are left panting on the floor, the last half hour or so was the most difficult one so far. Margaret can feel her muscle screaming from overexertion while Zofia is just down on her knees and panting wildly.
“… Hah… what did I told you? This training portion wasn’t mean for kids.”
“But!”
“No buts, you’re still too young. It will hamper if not outright stunt your growth if you keep being so stubborn like this… or do you need me to give me another lecture of why backbreaking training can have serious effect?”
“…”
“…”
“No is still no, young ladies! I will not compromise your growth with some misguided needs to grow unattended. The only thing after enforcing yourselves on a harsher training would be a long list of long-term consequences.”
Margaret and Zofia didn’t budge and they instead glared at their teacher. Nyx is at a complete lost with how desperate they have become in training. Margaret in particular had gotten more restless than usual.
Well it is not without reason since Nyx will be leaving soon in preparation for New Year’s Eve in Toron. Vincent had given her the message, a message that she has been waiting for months now. Thus they squeeze out anything they can learn while Nyx is still here for them and then for another year after returning from Victoria.
“… How long are you going to keep standing there Mwi?”
“Just passing by…”
“… Class dismissed.”
The 2 girls left the room obediently albeit with some dissatisfactions, now Nyx turn her face to look at Młynar. She can see that his mental state is stable but also deteriorating from how despondent he look. The last months had been torturous for herself, seeing the man she loves keeps losing a part of himself had a negative effect on her.
“Still the same?”
“Yeah… also… is that true?”
"Mm-hmm... I'll be leaving for Victoria soon... Vincent had finally gotten his end of the bargain after months... But if you need m-"
"No, even though I had asked of you to safeguard the family, you should still prioritize yourself... besides, it just feels wrong to deny you of your own hard work."
“… Right… Take care of yourself…else, I’ll drag you to hell if I found proof of a certain blonde man who keeps pushing himself…”
“No promise.”
“Hmph, figured you’ll say that… fucking blockhead…” despite her vulgar words, a melancholic smile graced her face.
“Before you go, I have something for you.”
Młynar presented a sword for her, the sword looks plain but looks can be deceiving.
“…You don’t have to…”
“Nonsense, consider it my gift to you… the blade emphasized more on durability.”
“Heh… Thanks…” She fastened the blade on her hip, and then cupped the man she adored so much.
“Until we meet again…”
“Likewise.” Młynar then left the room, he will need to rest. The search for Schnitz and Yolanta had been going on a standstill, but he won’t give up.
Seeing that he has vacated himself from the room, Nyx pulled her personal terminal out to re-read the message Vincent sent her.
[Nyx, your doctor will be attending the New Year’s Eve in my mansion this end of the year. She is a trustworthy woman and you’ll get whatever answers or objectives you’re always looking for. She can spare her time this year and the next 3 months only, in all honesty she is a busy woman and it is up to you at this point.]
“… Toron, here I come…”
[END OF CHAPTER]
Author’s Note:
Yo there, this is me, myself, and I, the author who doesn’t know how love work.
Wait, how does it work anyway? I'm serious here, because I keep hearing people and reading quotes along the line that "love is blind", "all is fair in love and war", and all those sophisticated stuff, which is why... I'm kinda lost, honestly speaking.
We’re back to Victoria, and those who know will know what transpired there.
Update as usual, I need to go sleep.
Ciao
