Still, he dreamt of her, of her silhouette, of her ethereal presence that vanished upon awakening in an empty bed. She had slipped away once, the girl who unexpectedly became his universe. The realization struck him. He had believed he had endless time to mend his errors, but the truth was far from that… They had crossed paths amidst the chaos of tangled circumstances, with much to unravel. How could he have foreseen the profound weight each word, each action, or the loss of her would bear as bitter remorse?
Having lost her once, he vowed never to repeat the same missteps. Igor gazed down at her everlasting beauty, yearning for this moment to endure eternally. Though he might never again touch the fortress of her guarded heart, he vowed to remain by her side. Whether it be the late hours of night or the early dawn, he would forever be her steadfast companion. The remainder of his existence would be dedicated to atoning for his transgressions.
Igor raised his fingers stiffly, gingerly brushing against the strands of her hair. His heart palpitated within his chest.
Meanwhile, she mumbled, “Dimi…?”
His hand froze. Dimi… the name of her cherished cousin, a man she had endeavored to save at great lengths.
Did his heart ache?
…Cease this torment… you do not deserve…
He pressed his palm against his heart, averting his gaze. In the meantime, she stirred from her slumber, her eyelids fluttering open. As her eyes landed upon his silhouette, a faint surprise graced her lips, and she swiftly sat up. The warmth of her presence receded, plunging Igor back into reality. He cleared his throat, informing her that they had taken a detour to her estate.
Gratitude and relief washed over her countenance. While she spent time with her people and inspected the estate’s current state, Igor wandered alone in the garden, pacing back and forth. The memory of Dimi, the person she called out to in her dreams, resurfaced in his mind. He remained a special presence, both then and now. The open affection in her eyes was evident. Tears had streamed down her face upon seeing him, the cousin she had not laid eyes upon for years. It was no different this time.
“Your Majesty, are you still preoccupied with that? Simply be truthful with her.”
Igor had intended to take a solitary stroll, yet as always, Basil appeared uninvited, buzzing around like an unwelcome insect. A shadow of displeasure crossed Igor’s face as he regarded Basil.
“Do not give me that look. I have acquired new information. Surely, Your Majesty desires it? But first, extend kindness to your loyal servant.”
Igor dismissed Basil’s last comment and inquired, “What information?”
“I have heard from the servants that the count is interred here.”
Igor fixed his gaze on Basil. “The count’s tomb is here?”
“Yes, Your Majesty. Moreover, did he not bring an illegitimate child into the estate, only to be ejected by Lady Rihannan, along with his father and daughter, before their journey to Chrichton? In any case, the count was buried beside his wife following his demise. Lady Rihannan must have softened towards him after his passing.”
In the past, Rihannan had clung to her familial ties, unaware of her father and half-sister’s lack of love… she had gone to great lengths to grant their selfish requests.
But what of her present stance? Why had she permitted him to be buried alongside her mother? Was it pity or forgiveness?
If he were in Rihannan’s place, he would never have forgiven them in the past, nor in the present. Unknowingly, Igor, along with countless others, had inflicted pain and anguish upon her.
Igor tightly shut his eyes. He could never forget the beast that had been unleashed within him—the blood staining his hands, the sensation of breaking bones and grinding flesh, the piercing screams. Those unforgettable days remained etched vividly in his memory. No human should bear witness to such horrors. A man ought to be righteous, but during that time, an evil that had lain dormant awakened within him, seizing control of his body and spirit.
Since then, he had lived a life steeped in destruction and hatred until the hands of time turned back. Even after her passing, he had concealed from her the evil that had run rampant inside him. He was ashamed, then and now… ashamed of deceiving her.
“I know your mind is burdened, Your Majesty, but why not be with her? Having someone by her side may offer more solace than being alone.”
Igor turned his head at Basil’s words.
“You should address the misunderstanding from the ship, Your Majesty. It might be awkward, but you should go. And take a flower with you. Women adore flowers.”
“…Does her mother appreciate flowers?”
Basil stood dumbfounded, taken aback. Was it not common knowledge that women adored flowers? He had never encountered one who did not… or perhaps he simply had not met the right ones.
“You make it abundantly clear that you wish not to answer my question, Basil.”
Basil grumbled, muttering softly, “Forget it, I shall refrain from offering you advice. This beast shall only vex me.” However, in the next instant, Basil’s face broke into a wide smile, clapping his hands together. “Of course, that is not the case, Your Majesty. Of course, of course! The late countess shall undoubtedly appreciate your gracious gesture.”
And in the end, Igor resolved to gather a bouquet of flowers from the garden, paying proper homage to her late mother. She had been her sole family member who genuinely cared for her, yet due to the late countess’ close association with the former queen, Igor had developed a deep aversion towards her. Regret plagued him…
She stood by the late countess’ grave, as expected, and Igor placed the bouquet before the tomb. His eyes sought Basil.
“Women cherish flowers,” Basil swiftly replied. Why don’t you state it yourself, you beast?!
Igor felt a tinge of nervousness, fearing her rejection, but fortunately, she displayed no signs of disdain. As he conversed with her, his gaze landed upon the count’s grave, and he stared at it with a cold, piercing glare. He had never delved into her family’s history. That was his fault. He had never sought to bridge their communication gap. No… it would be more accurate to say he had never truly known his wife. Only in her absence did he uncover the truth.
“Rihannan, I understand the difficult position you find yourself in, and I cannot fathom the depths of your emotions. However, I wish to make it unequivocally clear that I have no intention of treating you as a hostage. You are my wife, and I shall shield you from any harm. Please, do not be apprehensive,” he spoke, his nerves getting the best of him.
He fervently hoped that his words would be believed. He would never bring harm upon her again—it would be his final transgression. He knew that forcing her had been a selfish act, driven by his own desires… he comprehended this… and it would be his ultimate self-centered request…
Thankfully, she nodded gently. It marked the first time she had accepted his presence. That delicate affirmation brought him immeasurable joy, causing his heart to flutter.
In her previous life, she had sought love from the wrong people, only to be met with pain and suffering. Unaware of her inherent worthiness of all the beautiful things life had to offer, including love… Igor knew she might never love him, and he was content with that. He did not require her love. It was something he did not deserve. Instead, he would offer her the love he had never bestowed upon her.
And if an opportunity were to present itself, he hoped that one day, he could confess his sins and beg for forgiveness…
This was his earnest wish before her mother’s grave.
***
The return to the palace transpired quietly and inconspicuously. Having emerged triumphant in their battle against their arch-nemesis and rival, Chrichton, they had expected to partake in a victory parade. However, circumstances took a different turn. They returned to the palace directly, without the knowledge of the people of Edirne that their king had come back.
Nevertheless, the reception within the royal palace was splendid. As Rihannan stepped foot in the palace alongside Igor, a throng of people emerged in an organized manner, extending their warm welcome.
“Welcome, Your Majesty and Her Majesty the Queen.”
Prior to the wedding procession, the palace servants had already conferred upon her the title of queen.
“This is the lady-in-waiting who will attend to you.” Igor introduced the servant to Rihannan.
The woman, advanced in years, gathered her skirts and executed a deep bow. “The late Duke Cesley was my husband. You may call me Mrs. Cesley, my queen.”
Recognition flickered within Rihannan’s mind. Duke Cesley had been an upright nobleman, possessing vast territories in the province. Duke Cesley’s lineage could be traced back to the founding of Arundell. Consequently, the duchess wielded significant influence within social circles. However, after her husband’s demise, she retreated to her estate, choosing a life of quiet seclusion.
“Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Mrs. Cesley,” Rihannan smiled.
Though inwardly, she harbored no intentions of forging deep connections with the ladies-in-waiting, aware that she would depart the palace within a year’s time. Moreover, she held no fond memories of her previous maid of honor. When she first arrived at the palace as a young girl, the late queen had appointed a countess, a close confidante, as Rihannan’s maid of honor. The two of them had never seen eye to eye. With the countess’s privileged background, she exuded arrogance and a sense of superiority over the young queen. Rihannan had traversed her life within the palace, treading on thin ice, perpetually awaiting judgmental gazes seeking an opportunity to exploit her missteps. Yet she endured. Especially during that one occasion… even after a year had elapsed and she had failed to conceive a child, she had been coerced into taking medicine.
Still, he dreamt of her, of her silhouette, of her ethereal presence that vanished upon awakening in an empty bed. She had slipped away once, the girl who unexpectedly became his universe. The realization struck him. He had believed he had endless time to mend his errors, but the truth was far from that… They had crossed paths amidst the chaos of tangled circumstances, with much to unravel. How could he have foreseen the profound weight each word, each action, or the loss of her would bear as bitter remorse?
Having lost her once, he vowed never to repeat the same missteps. Igor gazed down at her everlasting beauty, yearning for this moment to endure eternally. Though he might never again touch the fortress of her guarded heart, he vowed to remain by her side. Whether it be the late hours of night or the early dawn, he would forever be her steadfast companion. The remainder of his existence would be dedicated to atoning for his transgressions.
Igor raised his fingers stiffly, gingerly brushing against the strands of her hair. His heart palpitated within his chest.
Meanwhile, she mumbled, “Dimi…?”
His hand froze. Dimi… the name of her cherished cousin, a man she had endeavored to save at great lengths.
Did his heart ache?
…Cease this torment… you do not deserve…
He pressed his palm against his heart, averting his gaze. In the meantime, she stirred from her slumber, her eyelids fluttering open. As her eyes landed upon his silhouette, a faint surprise graced her lips, and she swiftly sat up. The warmth of her presence receded, plunging Igor back into reality. He cleared his throat, informing her that they had taken a detour to her estate.
Gratitude and relief washed over her countenance. While she spent time with her people and inspected the estate’s current state, Igor wandered alone in the garden, pacing back and forth. The memory of Dimi, the person she called out to in her dreams, resurfaced in his mind. He remained a special presence, both then and now. The open affection in her eyes was evident. Tears had streamed down her face upon seeing him, the cousin she had not laid eyes upon for years. It was no different this time.
“Your Majesty, are you still preoccupied with that? Simply be truthful with her.”
Igor had intended to take a solitary stroll, yet as always, Basil appeared uninvited, buzzing around like an unwelcome insect. A shadow of displeasure crossed Igor’s face as he regarded Basil.
“Do not give me that look. I have acquired new information. Surely, Your Majesty desires it? But first, extend kindness to your loyal servant.”
Igor dismissed Basil’s last comment and inquired, “What information?”
“I have heard from the servants that the count is interred here.”
Igor fixed his gaze on Basil. “The count’s tomb is here?”
“Yes, Your Majesty. Moreover, did he not bring an illegitimate child into the estate, only to be ejected by Lady Rihannan, along with his father and daughter, before their journey to Chrichton? In any case, the count was buried beside his wife following his demise. Lady Rihannan must have softened towards him after his passing.”
In the past, Rihannan had clung to her familial ties, unaware of her father and half-sister’s lack of love… she had gone to great lengths to grant their selfish requests.
But what of her present stance? Why had she permitted him to be buried alongside her mother? Was it pity or forgiveness?
If he were in Rihannan’s place, he would never have forgiven them in the past, nor in the present. Unknowingly, Igor, along with countless others, had inflicted pain and anguish upon her.
Igor tightly shut his eyes. He could never forget the beast that had been unleashed within him—the blood staining his hands, the sensation of breaking bones and grinding flesh, the piercing screams. Those unforgettable days remained etched vividly in his memory. No human should bear witness to such horrors. A man ought to be righteous, but during that time, an evil that had lain dormant awakened within him, seizing control of his body and spirit.
Since then, he had lived a life steeped in destruction and hatred until the hands of time turned back. Even after her passing, he had concealed from her the evil that had run rampant inside him. He was ashamed, then and now… ashamed of deceiving her.
“I know your mind is burdened, Your Majesty, but why not be with her? Having someone by her side may offer more solace than being alone.”
Igor turned his head at Basil’s words.
“You should address the misunderstanding from the ship, Your Majesty. It might be awkward, but you should go. And take a flower with you. Women adore flowers.”
“…Does her mother appreciate flowers?”
Basil stood dumbfounded, taken aback. Was it not common knowledge that women adored flowers? He had never encountered one who did not… or perhaps he simply had not met the right ones.
“You make it abundantly clear that you wish not to answer my question, Basil.”
Basil grumbled, muttering softly, “Forget it, I shall refrain from offering you advice. This beast shall only vex me.” However, in the next instant, Basil’s face broke into a wide smile, clapping his hands together. “Of course, that is not the case, Your Majesty. Of course, of course! The late countess shall undoubtedly appreciate your gracious gesture.”
And in the end, Igor resolved to gather a bouquet of flowers from the garden, paying proper homage to her late mother. She had been her sole family member who genuinely cared for her, yet due to the late countess’ close association with the former queen, Igor had developed a deep aversion towards her. Regret plagued him…
She stood by the late countess’ grave, as expected, and Igor placed the bouquet before the tomb. His eyes sought Basil.
“Women cherish flowers,” Basil swiftly replied. Why don’t you state it yourself, you beast?!
Igor felt a tinge of nervousness, fearing her rejection, but fortunately, she displayed no signs of disdain. As he conversed with her, his gaze landed upon the count’s grave, and he stared at it with a cold, piercing glare. He had never delved into her family’s history. That was his fault. He had never sought to bridge their communication gap. No… it would be more accurate to say he had never truly known his wife. Only in her absence did he uncover the truth.
“Rihannan, I understand the difficult position you find yourself in, and I cannot fathom the depths of your emotions. However, I wish to make it unequivocally clear that I have no intention of treating you as a hostage. You are my wife, and I shall shield you from any harm. Please, do not be apprehensive,” he spoke, his nerves getting the best of him.
He fervently hoped that his words would be believed. He would never bring harm upon her again—it would be his final transgression. He knew that forcing her had been a selfish act, driven by his own desires… he comprehended this… and it would be his ultimate self-centered request…
Thankfully, she nodded gently. It marked the first time she had accepted his presence. That delicate affirmation brought him immeasurable joy, causing his heart to flutter.
In her previous life, she had sought love from the wrong people, only to be met with pain and suffering. Unaware of her inherent worthiness of all the beautiful things life had to offer, including love… Igor knew she might never love him, and he was content with that. He did not require her love. It was something he did not deserve. Instead, he would offer her the love he had never bestowed upon her.
And if an opportunity were to present itself, he hoped that one day, he could confess his sins and beg for forgiveness…
This was his earnest wish before her mother’s grave.
***
The return to the palace transpired quietly and inconspicuously. Having emerged triumphant in their battle against their arch-nemesis and rival, Chrichton, they had expected to partake in a victory parade. However, circumstances took a different turn. They returned to the palace directly, without the knowledge of the people of Edirne that their king had come back.
Nevertheless, the reception within the royal palace was splendid. As Rihannan stepped foot in the palace alongside Igor, a throng of people emerged in an organized manner, extending their warm welcome.
“Welcome, Your Majesty and Her Majesty the Queen.”
Prior to the wedding procession, the palace servants had already conferred upon her the title of queen.
“This is the lady-in-waiting who will attend to you.” Igor introduced the servant to Rihannan.
The woman, advanced in years, gathered her skirts and executed a deep bow. “The late Duke Cesley was my husband. You may call me Mrs. Cesley, my queen.”
Recognition flickered within Rihannan’s mind. Duke Cesley had been an upright nobleman, possessing vast territories in the province. Duke Cesley’s lineage could be traced back to the founding of Arundell. Consequently, the duchess wielded significant influence within social circles. However, after her husband’s demise, she retreated to her estate, choosing a life of quiet seclusion.
“Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Mrs. Cesley,” Rihannan smiled.
Though inwardly, she harbored no intentions of forging deep connections with the ladies-in-waiting, aware that she would depart the palace within a year’s time. Moreover, she held no fond memories of her previous maid of honor. When she first arrived at the palace as a young girl, the late queen had appointed a countess, a close confidante, as Rihannan’s maid of honor. The two of them had never seen eye to eye. With the countess’s privileged background, she exuded arrogance and a sense of superiority over the young queen. Rihannan had traversed her life within the palace, treading on thin ice, perpetually awaiting judgmental gazes seeking an opportunity to exploit her missteps. Yet she endured. Especially during that one occasion… even after a year had elapsed and she had failed to conceive a child, she had been coerced into taking medicine.
