Chapter 82
If audio player doesn't work, press Stop then Play button again
Chapter 82
“You always do that… You always judge and act as you please in the name of doing it for me.”
“….”
“…And Zachary, I’m not happy with that behavior at all.”
There was faint anger at the end of Iellie’s voice as she mumbled a little. After all, she was also human so there was no way she couldn’t not be angry at his act of pushing her away at will. Taking deep breaths, she opened her mouth again.
“Last time, I was deceived and left you, but… I won’t be deceived by you this time.”
Still, there was no answer from behind the closed door though she believed the truth had been conveyed.
“Zachary. Are you really not going to open this door?”
That question was the starting point. The next moment, Zachary could no longer control his own actions and the door opened with a click. As she squatted down, Iellie gazed up at him before calling his name.
“Zachary.”
Iellie got up and approached him. Immediately, he retreated.
“Don’t come.”
“No.”
However, she took a step closer. Their distance was getting closer. Tears welled up in the pale green eyes. For a moment, Zachary felt his head turn white.
‘…Please, Iellie. Do not cry.’
He desperately thought so.
When you cry, I go crazy.
She staggered, standing in front of Zachary, and she glared at him with all her might. She opened her mouth as it trembled softly.
“You were really bad.”
Tears streamed down her cheeks. Iellie, who was staring at him, spat out.
“If you were going to lie, you should have fooled me completely.”
Emotions are overflowing. In front of him, she thought she would be able to control her emotions until the end. It was a mistake.
“You were going to leave me so coldly, that’s why you wanted to deceive me until the very end.”
Having said that, Iellie raised her chin. Zachary’s pale face. There was no trace of the coldness that was there anymore.
“Somehow, you should have made me think you hated me.”
“Le…n.”
“If you can’t even take care of your emotions on your face properly, are you going to say things like that?”
She shot back fiercely. As she stared at his pale face, her upset heart poured out.
“Look. Even now, you look like you’re about to cry.”
“But, Len. I…”
The feeling of choking his neck was released. At the same time, the breath that had been blocked flowed. He took a deep breath.
“I—you, so I…”
He didn’t know what expression to put. Moreover, no matter what kind of face Zachary was making, Iellie saw his most secret feelings without any hesitation.
She uttered in a firm tone.
“I can recognize your feelings no matter how you look.”
“….”
“You’re still trying to fool me, Zachary?”
Iellie gazed up at him with a calm face. At that moment, Zachary hugged her tightly.
“Len.”
It hurt his heart to see Iellie feeling too light in his arms. He whispered lowly.
“You said you were coming back to me.”
“Yes.”
“…How many times have I given you a chance to leave me.”
The silver hair tangled on the white forehead shone pale in the moonlight. Then, his blue eyes look down at Iellie. His salvation. His miracle… Even though he tried to turn away and push her away, he couldn’t get away from her.
“I can’t let you go anymore.”
“Yes.”
She nodded her head and dug into his arms. Swallowing his breath, he missed this warmth so much.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, Len…”
Zachary’s voice was muffled. Still, there was no tear in his dry voice. It was a pity that it felt as if he had forgotten how to cry. Looking at him like that, Iellie reached out her hand and gently stroked his cheek.
“If you were going to be so sorry, you shouldn’t have done it in the first place.”
Saying so, she smiled faintly. Seeing her, Zachary wanted to apologize to her somehow.
“Len, how much I hurt you.”
“….”
“So, I don’t think there’s anything I can do if you don’t forgive me…”
At that, he grabbed her hand and rested his cheek against her palm. Iellie glanced at him with a puzzled face.
“What are you talking about?”
“I was selfish. I hurt you very much, so you can blame me for the rest of your life.”
Zachary continued speaking in a quick manner. He looked intently like a sinner confessing his sins. He concluded.
“Because you came back to me first.”
“….”
“…Please, don’t leave me.”
As he uttered so, Zachary put his head on her shoulder. It was a polite gesture as if he was adoring the Goddess.
“I know it’s funny to say this to you because I was the one who wanted to let you go first.”
“Zachary.”
“Even though I tried with all my might to forget you…”
Like confessing, he whispered a little. Iellie held her breath quietly as she listened to him.
“No matter how hard I tried, I just found out that I couldn’t forget you.”
Every time he opened and closed his eyes, and every time he passed his time… the only person that came to mind was Iellie. The wounded beast licked its wound. It still did it even though it knew that the wound would hurt.
“…Zachary.”
Iellie realized instinctively. Now, she was facing Zachary’s most intimate truth.
“To end our relationship, to let you go… I thought it was the way to make you happier.”
Not knowing what to say, she was silent. At the same time, Zachary’s eyes gradually grew red as he continued his words.
“Even though I still don’t think that judgment is wrong…”
Pain filled his eyes. Seeing him like that, Iellie knew. It must have been difficult for him, too. Zachary spoke in a muffled voice, sobbing lowly.
“From the moment you appeared before me.”
“….”
“Looking at you. Hearing your voice… I feel like I can hug you.”
Zachary buried his head deep in her shoulder. It was regrettable that he confessed his feelings like this.
“…I don’t think I can live without you now.”
The words came in a groan. He didn’t have the courage to look into Iellie’s eyes. He was so guilty that she couldn’t stand it.
“Even though I couldn’t control my emotions properly, I even ran into a rampage in front of you.”
“….”
“Even though I know you might be in danger… I can never give up on you.”
Zachary recalled the past. After the two divorced, he continued to watch over her, hearing news about her. Even though it was said to be for Iellie’s protection, in fact, he thought he would die if he didn’t even know about her.
“Len, you know what…”
Iellie silently listened to his words. Zachary brought out the anguish that had been lingering in him for a long time.
“I was afraid that you would be like my mother.”
If he kept her next to him, he thought she would get hurt because of him—like his mother, he feared that he would lose her forever.
“As you say… Even though I knew very well that my mother and you were different people.”
His mother, who always appeared in his nightmares. His mother, who belittled him that he would have been better off dead… If Iellie ever took her place in that nightmare…
At the thought, he was afraid of it and chose to separate instead.
“Nevertheless, I couldn’t help but be afraid. Even though I forcefully sent you…”
He tried to speak more before biting his lip again. The troubling times when he couldn’t let her go, even though he thought he shouldn’t be stopping her from going to another man. Zachary poured out his honest feelings.
“…I thought I was going to die because you weren’t with me.”
“….”
“I was patient and patient. Since I sent you, I thought I had to endure your absence somehow…….”
Letting out a shaky breath—even though he couldn’t stand it, he still had to endure it—he thought so. However, even that was arrogant.
“I didn’t know it was so painful that there was no one left for me.”
“…Zachary.”
“Even if I lose you, even if I lose my father… At least, I thought I could live.”
Iellie looked at him blankly. Zachary’s shoulders were shaking slightly.
“…It was all my mistake.”
…A child abandoned by the whole world and left alone. A boy who lived in a cold world made of snow and ice… The loneliness she felt the first time she met Zachary at the age of thirteen engulfed her again.
“Shall I beg you to come back? But, do I have the right to beg you?”
Zachary smiled bitterly. He knew that speaking out his heart was not something he should do.
“During the time I spent with you, I only thought about it… Is it funny?”
Iellie, who was staring at him, shook her head.
It wasn’t funny at all. It was because she did, too.
“Though you know what’s even funnier than that?”
It was Iellie who had endured the difficult times alone. Besides, it was he who had plunged her into that long loneliness, but he was so selfish that he kept begging her.
“Just before Father passed away, when we had our last conversation…”
His eyes wandered back to the past. Hearing those words, Iellie swallowed dry saliva for a moment. She didn’t think he would mention the Duke’s death first.
Zachary’s voice was now hoarse.
“Even then, I told father… I couldn’t answer if I would give up on you.”
“….”
“When I was the one who let you know that I am breaking up with you. When I hurt you, I-I…”
His voice began to tremble slightly.
Iellie bit the soft flesh in her mouth. She remembered the lasting time of losing him and living alone. The time she unintentionally looked out of the window and waited for him. Perhaps, someday he would come back to her, or maybe he would make her smile…
…The moments she had always been waiting for.
Iellie, who was looking at Zachary, opened her mouth.
“And I…”
“….”
“I want to know why the Duke chose death.”
Hearing those words, Zachary hardened his shoulders. Iellie calmly spoke.
“The Duke… I heard that he laid down his life.”
“Len.”
“I thought there was no reason for the Duke to give up his own life. If he died, I assumed it was because he had been ill all the time and was getting so ill… Still, why did he choose death?”
For the whole time, the reason why the Duke had made such a choice lingered in her mind. Seeing Zachary’s face darken all of a sudden, Iellie swallowed a sigh.
“Besides, it didn’t seem like it was going to get any worse right away until I left, so I never thought I would hear this kind of news.”
Iellie blurted the end of her words.
It was because she suddenly remembered a letter from the princess. The letter stated that the duke had committed suicide. However, there was no reason for the Duke to commit suicide.
“The reason is…”
Meanwhile, Zachary, who was reflexively trying to explain the reason, closed his mouth. The Duke’s death. Iellie still didn’t know anything. He had no intention of making it a secret though his mind was still complicated.
“The reason is…”
“Reason?”
“Yes.”
Saying that, Zachary’s eyes were complicated.
‘…Because I was a monster that couldn’t even handle my own strength properly.’
With that in mind, his mouth was filled with the bitter taste again. A frost demon that inherited the power of a silver dragon. What his father endured for such a monster, Zachary knew all too well.
“I…”
As he opened his mouth blankly, Zachary’s mind was a mess like a tangled thread. He didn’t even know where to start or how to tell the truth.
However, Iellie spoke up again.
“If it’s hard…”
Zachary gazed at her with painful eyes. She whispered.
“You can tell me later.”
“…Len.”
“I’m here, and I’m always ready to hear from you.”
Having said that, Iellie gently took his hand in hers. The warmth that passed from her hand to his hand was suffocatingly warm, and Zachary unconsciously felt the tip of his nose grow cold.
She smiled faintly.
__
Thank you so much for always supporting the novels I work on, even if you don’t buy me a coffee, I really do appreciate it a lot.
If you find any errors ( broken links, non-standard content, etc.. ), Please let us know or tag admin in comments so we can fix it as soon as possible.
Please report us if you find any errors so we can fix it asap!
Chapter 82
“You always do that… You always judge and act as you please in the name of doing it for me.”
“….”
“…And Zachary, I’m not happy with that behavior at all.”
There was faint anger at the end of Iellie’s voice as she mumbled a little. After all, she was also human so there was no way she couldn’t not be angry at his act of pushing her away at will. Taking deep breaths, she opened her mouth again.
“Last time, I was deceived and left you, but… I won’t be deceived by you this time.”
Still, there was no answer from behind the closed door though she believed the truth had been conveyed.
“Zachary. Are you really not going to open this door?”
That question was the starting point. The next moment, Zachary could no longer control his own actions and the door opened with a click. As she squatted down, Iellie gazed up at him before calling his name.
“Zachary.”
Iellie got up and approached him. Immediately, he retreated.
“Don’t come.”
“No.”
However, she took a step closer. Their distance was getting closer. Tears welled up in the pale green eyes. For a moment, Zachary felt his head turn white.
‘…Please, Iellie. Do not cry.’
He desperately thought so.
When you cry, I go crazy.
She staggered, standing in front of Zachary, and she glared at him with all her might. She opened her mouth as it trembled softly.
“You were really bad.”
Tears streamed down her cheeks. Iellie, who was staring at him, spat out.
“If you were going to lie, you should have fooled me completely.”
Emotions are overflowing. In front of him, she thought she would be able to control her emotions until the end. It was a mistake.
“You were going to leave me so coldly, that’s why you wanted to deceive me until the very end.”
Having said that, Iellie raised her chin. Zachary’s pale face. There was no trace of the coldness that was there anymore.
“Somehow, you should have made me think you hated me.”
“Le…n.”
“If you can’t even take care of your emotions on your face properly, are you going to say things like that?”
She shot back fiercely. As she stared at his pale face, her upset heart poured out.
“Look. Even now, you look like you’re about to cry.”
“But, Len. I…”
The feeling of choking his neck was released. At the same time, the breath that had been blocked flowed. He took a deep breath.
“I—you, so I…”
He didn’t know what expression to put. Moreover, no matter what kind of face Zachary was making, Iellie saw his most secret feelings without any hesitation.
She uttered in a firm tone.
“I can recognize your feelings no matter how you look.”
“….”
“You’re still trying to fool me, Zachary?”
Iellie gazed up at him with a calm face. At that moment, Zachary hugged her tightly.
“Len.”
It hurt his heart to see Iellie feeling too light in his arms. He whispered lowly.
“You said you were coming back to me.”
“Yes.”
“…How many times have I given you a chance to leave me.”
The silver hair tangled on the white forehead shone pale in the moonlight. Then, his blue eyes look down at Iellie. His salvation. His miracle… Even though he tried to turn away and push her away, he couldn’t get away from her.
“I can’t let you go anymore.”
“Yes.”
She nodded her head and dug into his arms. Swallowing his breath, he missed this warmth so much.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, Len…”
Zachary’s voice was muffled. Still, there was no tear in his dry voice. It was a pity that it felt as if he had forgotten how to cry. Looking at him like that, Iellie reached out her hand and gently stroked his cheek.
“If you were going to be so sorry, you shouldn’t have done it in the first place.”
Saying so, she smiled faintly. Seeing her, Zachary wanted to apologize to her somehow.
“Len, how much I hurt you.”
“….”
“So, I don’t think there’s anything I can do if you don’t forgive me…”
At that, he grabbed her hand and rested his cheek against her palm. Iellie glanced at him with a puzzled face.
“What are you talking about?”
“I was selfish. I hurt you very much, so you can blame me for the rest of your life.”
Zachary continued speaking in a quick manner. He looked intently like a sinner confessing his sins. He concluded.
“Because you came back to me first.”
“….”
“…Please, don’t leave me.”
As he uttered so, Zachary put his head on her shoulder. It was a polite gesture as if he was adoring the Goddess.
“I know it’s funny to say this to you because I was the one who wanted to let you go first.”
“Zachary.”
“Even though I tried with all my might to forget you…”
Like confessing, he whispered a little. Iellie held her breath quietly as she listened to him.
“No matter how hard I tried, I just found out that I couldn’t forget you.”
Every time he opened and closed his eyes, and every time he passed his time… the only person that came to mind was Iellie. The wounded beast licked its wound. It still did it even though it knew that the wound would hurt.
“…Zachary.”
Iellie realized instinctively. Now, she was facing Zachary’s most intimate truth.
“To end our relationship, to let you go… I thought it was the way to make you happier.”
Not knowing what to say, she was silent. At the same time, Zachary’s eyes gradually grew red as he continued his words.
“Even though I still don’t think that judgment is wrong…”
Pain filled his eyes. Seeing him like that, Iellie knew. It must have been difficult for him, too. Zachary spoke in a muffled voice, sobbing lowly.
“From the moment you appeared before me.”
“….”
“Looking at you. Hearing your voice… I feel like I can hug you.”
Zachary buried his head deep in her shoulder. It was regrettable that he confessed his feelings like this.
“…I don’t think I can live without you now.”
The words came in a groan. He didn’t have the courage to look into Iellie’s eyes. He was so guilty that she couldn’t stand it.
“Even though I couldn’t control my emotions properly, I even ran into a rampage in front of you.”
“….”
“Even though I know you might be in danger… I can never give up on you.”
Zachary recalled the past. After the two divorced, he continued to watch over her, hearing news about her. Even though it was said to be for Iellie’s protection, in fact, he thought he would die if he didn’t even know about her.
“Len, you know what…”
Iellie silently listened to his words. Zachary brought out the anguish that had been lingering in him for a long time.
“I was afraid that you would be like my mother.”
If he kept her next to him, he thought she would get hurt because of him—like his mother, he feared that he would lose her forever.
“As you say… Even though I knew very well that my mother and you were different people.”
His mother, who always appeared in his nightmares. His mother, who belittled him that he would have been better off dead… If Iellie ever took her place in that nightmare…
At the thought, he was afraid of it and chose to separate instead.
“Nevertheless, I couldn’t help but be afraid. Even though I forcefully sent you…”
He tried to speak more before biting his lip again. The troubling times when he couldn’t let her go, even though he thought he shouldn’t be stopping her from going to another man. Zachary poured out his honest feelings.
“…I thought I was going to die because you weren’t with me.”
“….”
“I was patient and patient. Since I sent you, I thought I had to endure your absence somehow…….”
Letting out a shaky breath—even though he couldn’t stand it, he still had to endure it—he thought so. However, even that was arrogant.
“I didn’t know it was so painful that there was no one left for me.”
“…Zachary.”
“Even if I lose you, even if I lose my father… At least, I thought I could live.”
Iellie looked at him blankly. Zachary’s shoulders were shaking slightly.
“…It was all my mistake.”
…A child abandoned by the whole world and left alone. A boy who lived in a cold world made of snow and ice… The loneliness she felt the first time she met Zachary at the age of thirteen engulfed her again.
“Shall I beg you to come back? But, do I have the right to beg you?”
Zachary smiled bitterly. He knew that speaking out his heart was not something he should do.
“During the time I spent with you, I only thought about it… Is it funny?”
Iellie, who was staring at him, shook her head.
It wasn’t funny at all. It was because she did, too.
“Though you know what’s even funnier than that?”
It was Iellie who had endured the difficult times alone. Besides, it was he who had plunged her into that long loneliness, but he was so selfish that he kept begging her.
“Just before Father passed away, when we had our last conversation…”
His eyes wandered back to the past. Hearing those words, Iellie swallowed dry saliva for a moment. She didn’t think he would mention the Duke’s death first.
Zachary’s voice was now hoarse.
“Even then, I told father… I couldn’t answer if I would give up on you.”
“….”
“When I was the one who let you know that I am breaking up with you. When I hurt you, I-I…”
His voice began to tremble slightly.
Iellie bit the soft flesh in her mouth. She remembered the lasting time of losing him and living alone. The time she unintentionally looked out of the window and waited for him. Perhaps, someday he would come back to her, or maybe he would make her smile…
…The moments she had always been waiting for.
Iellie, who was looking at Zachary, opened her mouth.
“And I…”
“….”
“I want to know why the Duke chose death.”
Hearing those words, Zachary hardened his shoulders. Iellie calmly spoke.
“The Duke… I heard that he laid down his life.”
“Len.”
“I thought there was no reason for the Duke to give up his own life. If he died, I assumed it was because he had been ill all the time and was getting so ill… Still, why did he choose death?”
For the whole time, the reason why the Duke had made such a choice lingered in her mind. Seeing Zachary’s face darken all of a sudden, Iellie swallowed a sigh.
“Besides, it didn’t seem like it was going to get any worse right away until I left, so I never thought I would hear this kind of news.”
Iellie blurted the end of her words.
It was because she suddenly remembered a letter from the princess. The letter stated that the duke had committed suicide. However, there was no reason for the Duke to commit suicide.
“The reason is…”
Meanwhile, Zachary, who was reflexively trying to explain the reason, closed his mouth. The Duke’s death. Iellie still didn’t know anything. He had no intention of making it a secret though his mind was still complicated.
“The reason is…”
“Reason?”
“Yes.”
Saying that, Zachary’s eyes were complicated.
‘…Because I was a monster that couldn’t even handle my own strength properly.’
With that in mind, his mouth was filled with the bitter taste again. A frost demon that inherited the power of a silver dragon. What his father endured for such a monster, Zachary knew all too well.
“I…”
As he opened his mouth blankly, Zachary’s mind was a mess like a tangled thread. He didn’t even know where to start or how to tell the truth.
However, Iellie spoke up again.
“If it’s hard…”
Zachary gazed at her with painful eyes. She whispered.
“You can tell me later.”
“…Len.”
“I’m here, and I’m always ready to hear from you.”
Having said that, Iellie gently took his hand in hers. The warmth that passed from her hand to his hand was suffocatingly warm, and Zachary unconsciously felt the tip of his nose grow cold.
She smiled faintly.
__
Thank you so much for always supporting the novels I work on, even if you don’t buy me a coffee, I really do appreciate it a lot.
If you find any errors ( broken links, non-standard content, etc.. ), Please let us know or tag admin in comments so we can fix it as soon as possible.
Chapter 82You always do that You always judge and act as you please in the name of doing it for me..And Zachary, I'm not happy with that behavior at all.There was faint anger at the end of Iellie's voice as she mumbled a little. After all, she was also human so there was no way she couldn't not be angry at his act of pushing her away at will. Taking deep breaths, she opened her mouth again.Last time, I was deceived and left you, but I won't be deceived by you this time.Still, there was no answer from behind the closed door though she believed the truth had been conveyed.Zachary. Are you really not going to open this door?That question was the starting point. The next moment, Zachary could no longer control his own actions and the door opened with a click. As she squatted down, Iellie gazed up at him before calling his name.Zachary.Iellie got up and approached him. Immediately, he retreated.Don't come.No.However, she took a step closer. Their distance was getting closer. Tears welled up in the pale green eyes. For a moment, Zachary felt his head turn white.Please, Iellie. Do not cry.'He desperately thought so.When you cry, I go crazy.She staggered, standing in front of Zachary, and she glared at him with all her might. She opened her mouth as it trembled softly.You were really bad.Tears streamed down her cheeks. Iellie, who was staring at him, spat out.If you were going to lie, you should have fooled me completely.Emotions are overflowing. In front of him, she thought she would be able to control her emotions until the end. It was a mistake.You were going to leave me so coldly, that's why you wanted to deceive me until the very end.Having said that, Iellie raised her chin. Zachary's pale face. There was no trace of the coldness that was there anymore.Somehow, you should have made me think you hated me.Len.If you can't even take care of your emotions on your face properly, are you going to say things like that?She shot back fiercely. As she stared at his pale face, her upset heart poured out.Look. Even now, you look like you're about to cry.But, Len. IThe feeling of choking his neck was released. At the same time, the breath that had been blocked flowed. He took a deep breath.Iyou, so IHe didn't know what expression to put. Moreover, no matter what kind of face Zachary was making, Iellie saw his most secret feelings without any hesitation.She uttered in a firm tone.I can recognize your feelings no matter how you look..You're still trying to fool me, Zachary?Iellie gazed up at him with a calm face. At that moment, Zachary hugged her tightly.Len.It hurt his heart to see Iellie feeling too light in his arms. He whispered lowly.You said you were coming back to me.Yes.How many times have I given you a chance to leave me.The silver hair tangled on the white forehead shone pale in the moonlight. Then, his blue eyes look down at Iellie. His salvation. His miracle Even though he tried to turn away and push her away, he couldn't get away from her.I can't let you go anymore.Yes.She nodded her head and dug into his arms. Swallowing his breath, he missed this warmth so much.I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, LenZachary's voice was muffled. Still, there was no tear in his dry voice. It was a pity that it felt as if he had forgotten how to cry. Looking at him like that, Iellie reached out her hand and gently stroked his cheek.If you were going to be so sorry, you shouldn't have done it in the first place.Saying so, she smiled faintly. Seeing her, Zachary wanted to apologize to her somehow.Len, how much I hurt you..So, I don't think there's anything I can do if you don't forgive meAt that, he grabbed her hand and rested his cheek against her palm. Iellie glanced at him with a puzzled face.What are you talking about?I was selfish. I hurt you very much, so you can blame me for the rest of your life.Zachary continued speaking in a quick manner. He looked intently like a sinner confessing his sins. He concluded.Because you came back to me first..Please, don't leave me.As he uttered so, Zachary put his head on her shoulder. It was a polite gesture as if he was adoring the Goddess.I know it's funny to say this to you because I was the one who wanted to let you go first.Zachary.Even though I tried with all my might to forget youLike confessing, he whispered a little. Iellie held her breath quietly as she listened to him.No matter how hard I tried, I just found out that I couldn't forget you.Every time he opened and closed his eyes, and every time he passed his time the only person that came to mind was Iellie. The wounded beast licked its wound. It still did it even though it knew that the wound would hurt.Zachary.Iellie realized instinctively. Now, she was facing Zachary's most intimate truth.To end our relationship, to let you go I thought it was the way to make you happier.Not knowing what to say, she was silent. At the same time, Zachary's eyes gradually grew red as he continued his words.Even though I still don't think that judgment is wrongPain filled his eyes. Seeing him like that, Iellie knew. It must have been difficult for him, too. Zachary spoke in a muffled voice, sobbing lowly.From the moment you appeared before me..Looking at you. Hearing your voice I feel like I can hug you.Zachary buried his head deep in her shoulder. It was regrettable that he confessed his feelings like this.I don't think I can live without you now.The words came in a groan. He didn't have the courage to look into Iellie's eyes. He was so guilty that she couldn't stand it.Even though I couldn't control my emotions properly, I even ran into a rampage in front of you..Even though I know you might be in danger I can never give up on you.Zachary recalled the past. After the two divorced, he continued to watch over her, hearing news about her. Even though it was said to be for Iellie's protection, in fact, he thought he would die if he didn't even know about her.Len, you know whatIellie silently listened to his words. Zachary brought out the anguish that had been lingering in him for a long time.I was afraid that you would be like my mother.If he kept her next to him, he thought she would get hurt because of himlike his mother, he feared that he would lose her forever.As you say Even though I knew very well that my mother and you were different people.His mother, who always appeared in his nightmares. His mother, who belittled him that he would have been better off dead If Iellie ever took her place in that nightmareAt the thought, he was afraid of it and chose to separate instead.Nevertheless, I couldn't help but be afraid. Even though I forcefully sent youHe tried to speak more before biting his lip again. The troubling times when he couldn't let her go, even though he thought he shouldn't be stopping her from going to another man. Zachary poured out his honest feelings.I thought I was going to die because you weren't with me..I was patient and patient. Since I sent you, I thought I had to endure your absence somehow.Letting out a shaky breatheven though he couldn't stand it, he still had to endure ithe thought so. However, even that was arrogant.I didn't know it was so painful that there was no one left for me.Zachary.Even if I lose you, even if I lose my father At least, I thought I could live.Iellie looked at him blankly. Zachary's shoulders were shaking slightly.It was all my mistake.A child abandoned by the whole world and left alone. A boy who lived in a cold world made of snow and ice The loneliness she felt the first time she met Zachary at the age of thirteen engulfed her again.Shall I beg you to come back? But, do I have the right to beg you?Zachary smiled bitterly. He knew that speaking out his heart was not something he should do.During the time I spent with you, I only thought about it Is it funny?Iellie, who was staring at him, shook her head.It wasn't funny at all. It was because she did, too.Though you know what's even funnier than that?It was Iellie who had endured the difficult times alone. Besides, it was he who had plunged her into that long loneliness, but he was so selfish that he kept begging her.Just before Father passed away, when we had our last conversationHis eyes wandered back to the past. Hearing those words, Iellie swallowed dry saliva for a moment. She didn't think he would mention the Duke's death first.Zachary's voice was now hoarse.Even then, I told father I couldn't answer if I would give up on you..When I was the one who let you know that I am breaking up with you. When I hurt you, I-IHis voice began to tremble slightly.Iellie bit the soft flesh in her mouth. She remembered the lasting time of losing him and living alone. The time she unintentionally looked out of the window and waited for him. Perhaps, someday he would come back to her, or maybe he would make her smileThe moments she had always been waiting for.Iellie, who was looking at Zachary, opened her mouth.And I.I want to know why the Duke chose death.Hearing those words, Zachary hardened his shoulders. Iellie calmly spoke.The Duke I heard that he laid down his life.Len.I thought there was no reason for the Duke to give up his own life. If he died, I assumed it was because he had been ill all the time and was getting so ill Still, why did he choose death?For the whole time, the reason why the Duke had made such a choice lingered in her mind. Seeing Zachary's face darken all of a sudden, Iellie swallowed a sigh.Besides, it didn't seem like it was going to get any worse right away until I left, so I never thought I would hear this kind of news.Iellie blurted the end of her words.It was because she suddenly remembered a letter from the princess. The letter stated that the duke had committed suicide. However, there was no reason for the Duke to commit suicide.The reason isMeanwhile, Zachary, who was reflexively trying to explain the reason, closed his mouth. The Duke's death. Iellie still didn't know anything. He had no intention of making it a secret though his mind was still complicated.The reason isReason?Yes.Saying that, Zachary's eyes were complicated.Because I was a monster that couldn't even handle my own strength properly.'With that in mind, his mouth was filled with the bitter taste again. A frost demon that inherited the power of a silver dragon. What his father endured for such a monster, Zachary knew all too well.IAs he opened his mouth blankly, Zachary's mind was a mess like a tangled thread. He didn't even know where to start or how to tell the truth.However, Iellie spoke up again.If it's hardZachary gazed at her with painful eyes. She whispered.You can tell me later.Len.I'm here, and I'm always ready to hear from you.Having said that, Iellie gently took his hand in hers. The warmth that passed from her hand to his hand was suffocatingly warm, and Zachary unconsciously felt the tip of his nose grow cold.She smiled faintly.__Thank you so much for always supporting the novels I work on, even if you don't buy me a coffee, I really do appreciate it a lot. If you find any errors broken links, non-standard content, etc.. , Please let us know or tag admin in comments so we can fix it as soon as possible.
