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Natasha the Halve - Chapter 24

Published at 30th of April 2022 05:08:43 PM


Chapter 24: – Memento Mori. End of Arc 2.

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It took me seven days to reach the 100th floor and have the party at level 800 total on average. Things went way better than I expected, the cash shop items really served their purpose. Pay to win for life!

On the 56th, 69th, and 78th floor, we came across groups of people killing things. I had found the lack of high leveled people in Mountroad a little odd, considering there’s a dungeon in the city. Turns out most were delving the dungeon or taking a break in the city according to Yolin.

I deftly ignored them, however. They shouted some expletives my way for killing everything, but I paid no attention to them and continued my speed run.

Lapia helped me do the math:

1 hour for each floor from 6a.m. to 10p.m.

Sleep from 11p.m. to 5a.m. to function properly with rotating watch.

1 hour for lunch every day, and thirty minutes of break to avoid going insane from the monotony.

In the mornings, I exercised with Yolin. She wasn’t interested in Yoga, and instead used thick, heavy chains to train her body. Once finished, we’d spar for a bit and share cheeky kisses once in a while. I don’t know if it’s the difference in age or what, but she’s the most forward with her wants. Really nice. An honest woman is a treasure.

During the day I’d clear the dungeon floors, killing everything and mostly avoiding swarms or generally small monsters to save time. Even the party acquiring a third class cost us half a day. Atrocious.

During breaks I’d relieve stress by doing some silly skit with everyone and improve my friendship with Bonte and Bromisnar, which was going fairly well all things considered. They didn’t say much about themselves, but were pretty fun to talk to.

When we made camp, Lapia would teach me math and the basics of E’er for an hour and then we would all kiss for a bit. She’s quite the thirsty Elf, I must say. She tried to sneak a hand into my panties a few times, which earned her a scolding.

In the night I’d cuddle with Alyssa and she’d tell me about the Dragon Tongue. She tried to get under Lapia’s panties a few times, but got the same treatment as Lapia did, but from Yolin. Doing naughty things in a dungeon is bad manners, after all. Especially if men are nearby.

100th floor, where a cave system occupied the space. I had seen many environments, from labyrinths, jungles, sand plains, to swampy expanses. Dungeons are weird. E’er is weird. Galeia is weird.

I was facing an abomination. The last in the dungeon. Tens of corpses were strewn around us, filling the space with the smell of highly acidic fluids.

[Floor Guardian – Ur’en, Lvl 820]

Turns out, these abominations aren’t ordinary monsters but bosses.

It was a 10m long, green worm. With a mouth that had four jaws and an anus-like opening that I assumed it ate with. Its skin was slimy, shiny, and overall fucking disgusting.

So far, combat had been anything but rewarding. Everything died too quickly. Life lacked tension. And I had the feeling it would be that way for a while unless I faced creatures around my own level.

Alyssa mentioned this dungeon was mid-tier. That leaves little hope for any interesting fight to happen. Not that I want to look death in the eye again. But my tale wouldn’t be interesting if all I do is fight small fries like these.

I dodged a squirt of acid and closed in on it, then stabbed it with my spear once. It made clicking sounds that made my skin crawl.

But I earned it, in a way. Hell was enough to last me a long while. I’m thinking of taking a long vacation in Paarjo after this. Gods can wait.

The Ur’en slithered away, leaving a trace of green blood after it.

“This is boring…” I whispered as I chased it.

Glancing behind me, I saw my companions on top of the mounts following me a good fifty meters away. They were wearing their combat gear, so I had no clue as to their expressions. Only Yolin had her face uncovered. She was laughing at something as she talked with the other two on Pochi.

I want to have sex… I grumbled in my mind. Maybe have Yolin use all her arms to fuck me senseless. Well… I’m not that much of a pervert. I mean, I’m not a pervert at all.

“Nope…” I sighed. “I am a massive degenerate. Who acclimates so quickly to a new sexual organ, anyway?”

I caught up to the bug and used the blade of my weapon to quickly write “Хуй” on its side. I chuckled at the childishness of my actions. It made that grating sound again, and the smell of its blood was making me dizzy.

It turned to me and squirted acid again. I dropped to the ground and avoided it, opportunity it took to try and crush me under its weight. I grabbed it like Atlas did the world and quickly stood up, throwing it high in the air.

It hit the ceiling of the cave we were in and then fell down towards me. I lined my pike and skewered it like shashlik. A very unappetizing shashlik. Its body collapsed on its own weight, helping me in the culinary endeavor of expanding Galeia’s insect cuisine. Something I’m sure the world’s future generations will be grateful for.

I’m dumb, though.

All its blood dripped on me. The smell was not as bad as demons’ blood, but my mind is whole now, unlike then. I vomited in my helmet, which made the whole situation even worse.

There was a karmic catharsis to it all. I was distracted, thinking of sex while killing a dungeon boss. Justice was served.

I flung its body towards a wall, where it burst like a water balloon. I knelt on the ground and made the helmet disappear, taking a deep breath now that my mouth and nose weren’t covered in vomit, then coughed a few times.

“This is the worst!” I exclaimed as I wiped my face with a towel.

My vomit wasn’t food like I expected, but a transparent liquid that smelled like stale E’er. Very different from my first time throwing up.

I stood up and raised both arms.

“World record for level 800!” I cheered.

The party walked up to me and I appraised them one by one, an activity I made into a habit lately.

[Alyssa Pruvik – Bonded Partner – Krystaali Luzo, Lvl 274 Cardinal]

[Yolin Makav – Bonded Partner – Red Oni, Lvl 305 Asura]

[Lapia Pofeta – Bonded Partner – Domi Elf, Lvl 273 Pyromancer]

[Bromisnar Bahadh – Bonded Companion – Khlyp Satyr, Lvl 271 Minstrel]

[Bonte Slirmy – Bonded Companion – Shishi Tigea, Lvl 270 Shadow Chaser]

[Sonya, Lvl 815 Ratnak]

[Pochi, lvl 817 Fekir]

“What is your total level?” I asked them as I changed clothes to a bikini.

I took out a water bottle and did my best to clean my hair.

“819,” Alyssa said.

“818,” Lapia grumbled.

“852,” Yolin said with a big smile. “Haven’t gained a single level, but it’s been a blast!”

“813,” Bonte answered.

“815,” Bromisnar said with a nod.

“Isn’t it great to level up this fast?” I asked as I opened the third bottle and emptied it on my head.

“Not at all,” Lapia said back and crossed her arms. “All my Storm Ruler skills are still level one.”

The rest nodded in agreement.

“Wait,” I said and rubbed my forehead. “Skills don’t level up with E’er?”

“They don’t,” answered Bromisnar. “They only go up when you use them.”

“Well… next time you carry me,” I shrugged. “That way you level up your skills. How does that sound?”

I continued cleaning my hair. The material was supposedly indestructible so I had thought it’d be a massive pain if it grew, but my body was as hairless as when I first woke up and my golden hairs were the same length.

“That’d be better,” Yolin said. “I wanted to join you, but I don’t run as fast.”

I nodded.

“That would have been pretty nice,” I admitted. “Let’s get out of here.”

Words of agreement were shared. Once my hair was clean enough I wore a different set of armor since the previous was covered in acidic blood. My hair still had the stench of the Ur’en, so I walked next to the mounts as we made our way to the 99th floor.

“Where should we go next?” I asked as we crossed the savanna-looking floor. “I mean, where’s the nearest dungeon?”

“We should head northwest as I said before,” Alyssa responded from atop Pochi. “Lakeview is in that direction. Then, we could move towards Peakside. I don’t think we’ll be as fast as you were, but we should make good time before going to Paarjo.”

“Those are some ridiculous names,” I sighed.

“New cities,” Bonte said. “New naming sense. There’s no translation for Paarjo.”

I nodded and thought about the possible names the cities had in French, since cat people speak that in this world, apparently.

Well, Lumin lacks the eux to be proper French. I guess that was a bit of foreshadowing. Koluum… what would that be? And Juufk? Well, whatever. Maybe they don’t mean anything and I’m just overthinking it.

I picked up speed and soon we were running through the floors going up.

When we get to the capital I’ll make sure to read about this world in depth, I can’t be ignorant for much longer.

We exited the dungeon on the 26th day of the third month, at night. It was already summer, and the consecutive days of rain had already passed. It felt the exact same to me, though. Warm, but not enough to make me sweat. Only two moons were visible, Shia – the big, purple one –, and Tia – the one that looks like a small planet.

A Watcher collected the tax and we continued to the inn. On the way, Alyssa and Lapia asked a patrolling Watcher to fetch the Bhin and bring them to the inn. I found it weird that people could request that from them, but there were a lot going around so maybe that didn’t get in the way of public security.

I was humming a song while looking at the moons when I saw a shooting star.

I wish to know how my dad is doing. Did my death devastate him? How is my brother doing? Did the million years in hell pass on earth as well? Did time pass normally? I may be older than all the Kingdoms in this world…

I looked down, scoffing at my own thoughts. Something caught my attention and I froze.

In front of me, a sheet of paper materialized. It floated in the air one meter above ground, at arms reach.

“Lapia, do you see this?” I asked the Elf, pointing at the paper.

She looked where I was pointing, then shook her head.

“I see nothing. Why?” she said, tilting her head.

“There’s a sheet of paper floating…” I muttered. “I made a wish to a shooting star and it popped up.”

“A wish to a shooting star?” she chuckled. “That’s just something entering the planet’s atmosphere, nothing that can grant wishes.”

I turned to the rest, but noticed Alyssa talking to Bromisnar about books. Bonte was chatting with Yolin about some fight or other.

“Are you absolutely sure?” I asked. “It’s not the time to play pranks.”

“I swear on Photem,” she said with a serious face.

“I don’t know what that means, but I’ll take your word on it,” I said with a sigh.

Extending a hand, I grabbed the sheet of paper.

“Holy shit!” Lapia exclaimed. “A paper really was there! I saw it after you grabbed it. What in the actual fuck?”

“No clue,” I shook my head.

Looking at the contents, I smiled. It was written in Cyrillic.

“Ay…” I whispered. "How the fuck does this work?"

The text contained the following:

‘Obituary for Natasha Nikolayevna Novak.

Natasha Nikolayevna Novak known as Nata or Nasha was born in Saratov, Russia. She passed away this 20th of September, 2034 in Madrid, Spain.

Daughter of Nikolai Illych Novak, and sister of Vladimir Nikolayevich Novak, who bid her farewell.

Nata grew up in Saratov, graduating from School Nº 23 in the same city. Continuing her studies at the Russian Academy of Arts in St. Petersburg, where she achieved outstanding results. She then went to work at State Hermitage Museum for two short years. Finding success on the Internet, she made a name for herself with her beautiful artwork and positive personality, finding clients in all spheres of life all around the world.

She was a skilled artist, notorious for being the first of many to bring life to various internet personalities, who also bid her farewell.

Her long career with Methesda Hardworks began in 2022, where she gave realism to a virtual world with her work.

Nata was not only a prolific artist, she also had a talent with the piano. She brightened family reunions with her hard earned skills, especially cherished by her grandmother Irina Dimitriyevna Izmaylova, whom she had a close relationship with before she passed in 2010.

Her loving attitude and her ability to breathe life with her art will be remembered for years to come.’

Biggest-Kusa-Out-There

I'm done with exams, so I will post a few more chapters each week instead of going for the 7k words chapters as before. It'd be easier to read and to pack as well. Hope you're not too disillusioned with the lack in girth of Natasha's stuff... heh.

Also, we'll see a time skip next chapter. We have seen them interact and go about their lives to a certain extent, so it won't really rush things.

I've been thinking of doing a special chapter about the insights of how I came up with the story and the world it inhabits. I have a few FAQs, but feel free to ask things you'd like to know as well. I won't answer spoilers, naturally.

See you soon!




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