Chapter 63: Chapter 63: Don’t look while eating, seriously.
Translator: 549690339
Closing the door, Yu Minglang placed the food on the coffee table, and Xiao Qian walked over and sat down on the sofa. He took out the food and gave her a share.
“Did you call me over just to watch you eat?” Xiao Qian adjusted her sitting position, still not used to his stiff sofa.
“I’ve been busy all day and haven’t even had a sip of water.” He dragged an individual wooden chair over, just at an angle where he could see her without being too close to make her uncomfortable.
“Aren’t you thirsty?”
“I’m used to it. Back at my old unit, I would lay on top of a pigsty with a pile of grass on my head, hiding in the same spot for two days.”
Not eating or drinking while hiding at the old unit was a very normal thing. Although he had left now, he still missed it from time to time.
Pigsty… Xiao Qian gave the black rice porridge he put in front of her a glance and fell silent.
“So that pigsty, have you seen it? The dark and dirty mass that you can’t really see—”
Dark and messy? Xiao Qian looked at the black rice porridge and lost her appetite.
She really didn’t know in her past life that Yu Minglang could be so disgusting. Was it sincere? Revenge?
Yu Minglang finally found a topic that wouldn’t make the girl feel awkward—at least he thought so.
He thought this was a great entry point.
“Next to the pigsty, there’s a chicken coop, and next to the chicken coop is a duck shed. Do you know if the chicken coop is dirtier or the duck shed?”
“I, don’t, want, to, know!” Who would want to listen to him talk about this? Was he trying to disgust her?!
“I also lay in a mud pit once, just exposing my head. Then I accidentally tripped and took a mouthful of muddy water. You know what muddy water tastes like? It’s about the same color as the black rice porridge in front of you, haha!”
The guy who thought he had a great sense of humor from watching many Humor Master shows found that Xiao Qian just looked at him coldly, and he suddenly couldn’t laugh anymore.
“Was that very funny?” She didn’t need to feel guilty anymore. Really, it had nothing to do with her if this guy was single in his past life!
“Well, let’s eat, come on!” Yu Minglang seemed to realize that his opening line was not as good as he had imagined.
“I’m not hungry!” After being disgusted by him, who could still eat?!
“What did you want to talk about?”
Xiao Qian felt she couldn’t continue to mess around with him. He would lead her astray.
“I haven’t eaten yet. Let me finish eating before we talk.” Yu Minglang immediately got nervous when it came to serious matters.
“Alright, you eat your fill. I’ll tell you about some things I’m interested in.”
Yu Minglang sat up straight in an instant. This matter was very important.
“You eat while I talk.” A cunning gleam flashed in Xiao Qian’s eyes.
Yu Minglang followed her instructions and grabbed a meat bun with one hand while drinking the porridge and looking at her expectantly.
He wanted to get to know her better.
Xiao Qian intended to avenge herself for his making her feel sick with the pigsty story earlier. Did he think that only he could disgust people with his expertise?
“Did you know that I applied for a major in psychology in university? Why did I choose this major? Because I really liked watching The Silence of the Lambs, the one where they cut open skulls, peel off the skin, and cat brains. I thought there was no difference between Hannibal eating brains and you eating a bun.”
Actually, she didn’t apply for the major for this reason. She did like watching horror movies, but the reason was just an excuse to disgust Yu Minglang.
Yu Minglang’s action of biting into the bun paused.
Xiao Qian continued with gleaming eyes, “Of course, that’s not the only disgusting movie I’ve seen. Have you ever heard of Sewer Mermaid?”
Yu Minglang stayed silent with the meat bun in his mouth.
Xiao Qian assumed that his reaction meant he hadn’t heard of it. Hche, it would be so much easier if he hadn’t – she was going to disgust him to death!
“It’s about a mermaid covered in pus-filled boils. Oh, the pus just flows everywhere, along with maggots – oh, is your bun filled with meat?” Haha, what a thrill!
Yu Minglang slowly swallowed the bun, but Xiao Qian still didn’t feel that it was satisfying enough. She pointed at the white porridge in front of him and said, “The pus was so thick and sticky and when it was vomited out later, it looked just like the white porridge in front of you.”
I’ll disgust you to death! How dare you disgust people with your chicken, duck, goose, dog, and cat stories! Xiao Qian was delighted with her rant.
“Actually, that movie was reflecting the destruction of nature by humans. The filming technique was somewhat bizarre, I personally don’t like it, but I do like Hannibal.” He took a sip of porridge, then pointed at the untouched bowl in front of Xiao Qian and said, “Eat.”
Xiao Qian was shocked. What the hell!
Is this even human?
He actually turned it into an educational message. How does his brain even work?
“The Silence of the Lambs, as an Academy Award-winning film for Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Director, and Best Adapted Screenplay, I think is better than the simply bizarre Sewer Mermaid. I’ve also read the original novel, and I think the movie version is more emotional…”
As he ate and talked, Xiao Qian swallowed hard, dumbfounded.
Who taught him this ability to find meaning in everything he watched?
I never imagined… Yu Minglang, you’d be someone who watches horror movies?
“It’s so strange that you watch these things.”
“Why is it strange? I can have normal mental entertainment too.”
“…” Apparently, his inner world was much more abundant than others?
“Can you eat while you talk?”
“After I graduated from my master’s program, I went to a prison execution site for a special reason. The bullet went through the back of the head, and there was a hole the size of a bowl on the forehead, with brain matter overflowing. The texture was indeed similar to tofu pudding. At the time, I didn’t have much reaction when I saw it, but when I ate tofu pudding at lunch, I suddenly remembered it and threw up. I didn’t eat anything that day, and I was fine after that.”
“…” So, he had already cultivated immunity to all poisons and used his “poison” to disgust her?
For Yu Minglang, the experienced old driver who had been through thick and thin, Xiao Qian felt completely defeated and powerless.
Which of her nerves was wrong? How could she expect to disgust this man with such strong mental endurance?
“Yu Minglang, did you have many special experiences at your old unit?”
“…” It was his turn to be silent.
“Do you ever feel guilty?”
“There are only 3-5 seconds between an order and shooting, so I don’t have any other thoughts.”
If they could choose, if the negotiation hadn’t broken down irretrievably, they wouldn’t have taken such action lightly.
“When you were just being rude to me… you also had that 3-5 seconds. What were you thinking?”
Xiao Qian successfully returned the derailed topic to its original track. No matter how roundabout their conversation in this room, at this moment, the topic had ultimately returned to the main point.
Did he think the female boss could be kissed just like that?
Chapter 63: Chapter 63: Don’t look while eating, seriously.
Translator: 549690339
Closing the door, Yu Minglang placed the food on the coffee table, and Xiao Qian walked over and sat down on the sofa. He took out the food and gave her a share.
“Did you call me over just to watch you eat?” Xiao Qian adjusted her sitting position, still not used to his stiff sofa.
“I’ve been busy all day and haven’t even had a sip of water.” He dragged an individual wooden chair over, just at an angle where he could see her without being too close to make her uncomfortable.
“Aren’t you thirsty?”
“I’m used to it. Back at my old unit, I would lay on top of a pigsty with a pile of grass on my head, hiding in the same spot for two days.”
Not eating or drinking while hiding at the old unit was a very normal thing. Although he had left now, he still missed it from time to time.
Pigsty… Xiao Qian gave the black rice porridge he put in front of her a glance and fell silent.
“So that pigsty, have you seen it? The dark and dirty mass that you can’t really see—”
Dark and messy? Xiao Qian looked at the black rice porridge and lost her appetite.
She really didn’t know in her past life that Yu Minglang could be so disgusting. Was it sincere? Revenge?
Yu Minglang finally found a topic that wouldn’t make the girl feel awkward—at least he thought so.
He thought this was a great entry point.
“Next to the pigsty, there’s a chicken coop, and next to the chicken coop is a duck shed. Do you know if the chicken coop is dirtier or the duck shed?”
“I, don’t, want, to, know!” Who would want to listen to him talk about this? Was he trying to disgust her?!
“I also lay in a mud pit once, just exposing my head. Then I accidentally tripped and took a mouthful of muddy water. You know what muddy water tastes like? It’s about the same color as the black rice porridge in front of you, haha!”
The guy who thought he had a great sense of humor from watching many Humor Master shows found that Xiao Qian just looked at him coldly, and he suddenly couldn’t laugh anymore.
“Was that very funny?” She didn’t need to feel guilty anymore. Really, it had nothing to do with her if this guy was single in his past life!
“Well, let’s eat, come on!” Yu Minglang seemed to realize that his opening line was not as good as he had imagined.
“I’m not hungry!” After being disgusted by him, who could still eat?!
“What did you want to talk about?”
Xiao Qian felt she couldn’t continue to mess around with him. He would lead her astray.
“I haven’t eaten yet. Let me finish eating before we talk.” Yu Minglang immediately got nervous when it came to serious matters.
“Alright, you eat your fill. I’ll tell you about some things I’m interested in.”
Yu Minglang sat up straight in an instant. This matter was very important.
“You eat while I talk.” A cunning gleam flashed in Xiao Qian’s eyes.
Yu Minglang followed her instructions and grabbed a meat bun with one hand while drinking the porridge and looking at her expectantly.
He wanted to get to know her better.
Xiao Qian intended to avenge herself for his making her feel sick with the pigsty story earlier. Did he think that only he could disgust people with his expertise?
“Did you know that I applied for a major in psychology in university? Why did I choose this major? Because I really liked watching The Silence of the Lambs, the one where they cut open skulls, peel off the skin, and cat brains. I thought there was no difference between Hannibal eating brains and you eating a bun.”
Actually, she didn’t apply for the major for this reason. She did like watching horror movies, but the reason was just an excuse to disgust Yu Minglang.
Yu Minglang’s action of biting into the bun paused.
Xiao Qian continued with gleaming eyes, “Of course, that’s not the only disgusting movie I’ve seen. Have you ever heard of Sewer Mermaid?”
Yu Minglang stayed silent with the meat bun in his mouth.
Xiao Qian assumed that his reaction meant he hadn’t heard of it. Hche, it would be so much easier if he hadn’t – she was going to disgust him to death!
“It’s about a mermaid covered in pus-filled boils. Oh, the pus just flows everywhere, along with maggots – oh, is your bun filled with meat?” Haha, what a thrill!
Yu Minglang slowly swallowed the bun, but Xiao Qian still didn’t feel that it was satisfying enough. She pointed at the white porridge in front of him and said, “The pus was so thick and sticky and when it was vomited out later, it looked just like the white porridge in front of you.”
I’ll disgust you to death! How dare you disgust people with your chicken, duck, goose, dog, and cat stories! Xiao Qian was delighted with her rant.
“Actually, that movie was reflecting the destruction of nature by humans. The filming technique was somewhat bizarre, I personally don’t like it, but I do like Hannibal.” He took a sip of porridge, then pointed at the untouched bowl in front of Xiao Qian and said, “Eat.”
Xiao Qian was shocked. What the hell!
Is this even human?
He actually turned it into an educational message. How does his brain even work?
“The Silence of the Lambs, as an Academy Award-winning film for Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Actress, Best Director, and Best Adapted Screenplay, I think is better than the simply bizarre Sewer Mermaid. I’ve also read the original novel, and I think the movie version is more emotional…”
As he ate and talked, Xiao Qian swallowed hard, dumbfounded.
Who taught him this ability to find meaning in everything he watched?
I never imagined… Yu Minglang, you’d be someone who watches horror movies?
“It’s so strange that you watch these things.”
“Why is it strange? I can have normal mental entertainment too.”
“…” Apparently, his inner world was much more abundant than others?
“Can you eat while you talk?”
“After I graduated from my master’s program, I went to a prison execution site for a special reason. The bullet went through the back of the head, and there was a hole the size of a bowl on the forehead, with brain matter overflowing. The texture was indeed similar to tofu pudding. At the time, I didn’t have much reaction when I saw it, but when I ate tofu pudding at lunch, I suddenly remembered it and threw up. I didn’t eat anything that day, and I was fine after that.”
“…” So, he had already cultivated immunity to all poisons and used his “poison” to disgust her?
For Yu Minglang, the experienced old driver who had been through thick and thin, Xiao Qian felt completely defeated and powerless.
Which of her nerves was wrong? How could she expect to disgust this man with such strong mental endurance?
“Yu Minglang, did you have many special experiences at your old unit?”
“…” It was his turn to be silent.
“Do you ever feel guilty?”
“There are only 3-5 seconds between an order and shooting, so I don’t have any other thoughts.”
If they could choose, if the negotiation hadn’t broken down irretrievably, they wouldn’t have taken such action lightly.
“When you were just being rude to me… you also had that 3-5 seconds. What were you thinking?”
Xiao Qian successfully returned the derailed topic to its original track. No matter how roundabout their conversation in this room, at this moment, the topic had ultimately returned to the main point.
Did he think the female boss could be kissed just like that?
