Chapter 282. Another one? (1/2)
It was Monday. There was only about a week until I would be able to take my knowledge test to receive my learner’s permit. However, this time around I planned to do something different.
For the time being, I’d pushed the matter of Izora and Zale to the back of my mind. They’d been doing their own thing for the last week since the field trip at the planetarium. It had nothing to do with me unless something went wrong and Izora requested my assistance.
I’d done what I could to give her a chance. The rest was up to her to figure out.
It was lunch and I had my eyes glued to the driver’s handbook on my desk. It wasn’t one I was familiar with though.
I was doing my best to read it but… there was an annoying fly buzzing around at my desk.
“Hey, Ran, quit ignoring me, man. Don’t be so cold, help a brother out. You’re taking your knowledge test soon, right? Why don’t I help you study for it? I already got my learner’s permit two months back.”
I looked up from my desk with an ugly expression. Are you kidding me? This guy was older than me? Yes, that stupid little detail was what finally got me to acknowledge his presence.
“Oh! You finally noticed me.” The identity of the fly buzzing about my desk was Jass, the only annoying guy in school who would approach me for anything.
“You’ve been badgering me for the last five minutes. Can you please take the hint and realize I’m ignoring you because you’re annoying?”
“Hahaha, your personality is as rotten as ever. But that’s what makes you, you, I guess.”
“Why the hell do you want to help me study?”
“Why? Well… you see… the thing is… I have... a new target.”
“Huh?” Already? Bro, don’t you think you bounce back a bit too fast? How long has it been again since Alicia shot you down again? I couldn’t help but ask, “What the hell do you mean... a new target?”
For some reason, I had a bad feeling about this. Anytime this guy approached me about these sorts of things it turned into something annoying.
“Well, you see, after being depressed over my last failed romantic endeavor, I’ve finally bounced back.”
Finally? What the hell do you mean finally? It was only last month!
“Things with Alicia just weren’t meant to be it seems. I’ve accepted it and moved on after a month.”
“Hah… Right… Good for you... Moving on. Now… what the hell does any of this have to do with me? Why would you think I give a flying shit about any of this?”
“Well, the thing is… the girl I’m interested in seems to be on good terms with Alicia. She doesn’t go to this school. I’ve only seen her waiting outside the school before and I saw Alicia run into her. They were chatting together about something outside the school.”
“Then what are you talking to me about this for? Go ask Alicia to hook you up or something, moron.”
“There’s no way I could go and do that. Are you crazy? It was only just a month ago that I was chasing after her. I’d look so shallow and pathetic if I went crawling to her begging for her to hook me up with her friend.”
I pictured the pathetic sight of Jass prostrating on the ground in front of Alicia begging for her to hook him up and couldn’t help but agree. That would be pretty awkward, not just for him, but for both parties.
“Look, it’s not like I have a direct connection to Alicia. The only connection I have is that my girlfriend is her friend. You’re asking the impossible.”
“Come on, just ask your girlfriend to talk to Alicia.”
“You can ask Rosa yourself.”
“How can I do that when not too long before Alicia I was chasing after her as well?”
“Ugh. Look, at this rate, it feels like if things don’t work out this time it’s going to turn into me trying to pull strings with my girlfriend to pull strings with Alicia to pull strings with Alicia’s friend to hook you up with their friend. This is a slippery slope man. I don’t want anything to do with this.”
“Please! You’re the best shot I have at connecting with that girl with how you’re Alicia’s best friend’s boyfriend!”
I can already predict the future. The next time I hear this line it’s going to be even longer. You’re the best shot I have at connecting with that girl with how you’re that girl’s friend of Alicia’s best friend’s boyfriend. Was that even correct? I felt like it wasn’t. I had a serious headache when I thought about it. How many layers deep would this idiot take things?
Would he ever stop?
The thought alone terrified me and sent shivers down my spine.
“I absolutely can’t help you with this.”
“Please! I’ll never ask you for anything again.”
“Never?”
“If… things go well.”
“Hell no. You’re on your own.”
“Please! I’m serious about this one!”
“Serious… about this one? Do you hear yourself right now? You jumped from Rosa, to her best friend, to the friend of Rosa’s best friend within seven months.”
“I know it sounds bad, but please believe me.”
“I’d be an idiot to believe you.”
“Unless I get a girlfriend, I’ll keep bugging you every single day until graduation.”
“No. You wouldn’t...”
“Are you doubting my persistence?”
When I thought about how many times he was shot down by Alicia in a single day, I trembled. If I had to deal with that level of persistence every day… it would be hell.
It really was in my best interest to hook this idiot up with someone. Just about anyone would do. This guy was too damn thirsty.
“Ugh… I guess… I can try to help you out. Anyway, do you know the girl’s name at least?”
“No idea.”
“Huh? How do you expect me to do anything without that at the bare minimum? I have to communicate this to Rosa for her to communicate it to Alicia. Without a name, it’d be impossible to do anything like this.”
“Well, I don’t know her name, but if you describe her, Alicia would definitely know who Rosa’s talking about. And since Rosa is best friends with Alicia, I’m sure she’ll know her name as well.”
“Look, Alicia has god knows how many fiends. It’d be a miracle if Rosa knows even 1% of their names. That’s especially the case when it comes to girls. She only knows guys since she typically doesn’t get along very well with most girls. She’d be just about as useless as I am when it comes to knowing girl’s names.”
“I see. Well, as long as you provide her with the description it’d be enough.”
“Okay, so? What’s the dead giveaway description of this girl?”
“She’s a gothic punk type of girl with short shoulder-length blue hair. She has two purple locks of hair that cross over the bridge of her nose. She’s got lip, tongue, and ear piercings. Three tattoos, a heart on her neck, a butterfly over her breasts, and a snake one over her belly. She wears black lipstick and paints her fingernails black.”
As he spoke, my expression turned dumber and dumber. My mouth was slightly open and the light in my eyes had completely drained.
“Long boots, fishnet stockings, a short black skirt. She was wearing a tight black tube top with strings holding it together at the front and a short-sleeved black jacket over it. Man, her cleavage was amazing dude. You shoulda seen it. That view… just thinking about it got me off ten times this last week.”
Can I die?
Why?
Why did it have to be Izora!
You absolute idiot!
I don’t want anything to do with this!
I collapsed on top of my desk and repeatedly banged my forehead hard against it trying to forget everything this idiot told me.
Chapter 282. Another one? (1/2)
It was Monday. There was only about a week until I would be able to take my knowledge test to receive my learner’s permit. However, this time around I planned to do something different.
For the time being, I’d pushed the matter of Izora and Zale to the back of my mind. They’d been doing their own thing for the last week since the field trip at the planetarium. It had nothing to do with me unless something went wrong and Izora requested my assistance.
I’d done what I could to give her a chance. The rest was up to her to figure out.
It was lunch and I had my eyes glued to the driver’s handbook on my desk. It wasn’t one I was familiar with though.
I was doing my best to read it but… there was an annoying fly buzzing around at my desk.
“Hey, Ran, quit ignoring me, man. Don’t be so cold, help a brother out. You’re taking your knowledge test soon, right? Why don’t I help you study for it? I already got my learner’s permit two months back.”
I looked up from my desk with an ugly expression. Are you kidding me? This guy was older than me? Yes, that stupid little detail was what finally got me to acknowledge his presence.
“Oh! You finally noticed me.” The identity of the fly buzzing about my desk was Jass, the only annoying guy in school who would approach me for anything.
“You’ve been badgering me for the last five minutes. Can you please take the hint and realize I’m ignoring you because you’re annoying?”
“Hahaha, your personality is as rotten as ever. But that’s what makes you, you, I guess.”
“Why the hell do you want to help me study?”
“Why? Well… you see… the thing is… I have... a new target.”
“Huh?” Already? Bro, don’t you think you bounce back a bit too fast? How long has it been again since Alicia shot you down again? I couldn’t help but ask, “What the hell do you mean... a new target?”
For some reason, I had a bad feeling about this. Anytime this guy approached me about these sorts of things it turned into something annoying.
“Well, you see, after being depressed over my last failed romantic endeavor, I’ve finally bounced back.”
Finally? What the hell do you mean finally? It was only last month!
“Things with Alicia just weren’t meant to be it seems. I’ve accepted it and moved on after a month.”
“Hah… Right… Good for you... Moving on. Now… what the hell does any of this have to do with me? Why would you think I give a flying shit about any of this?”
“Well, the thing is… the girl I’m interested in seems to be on good terms with Alicia. She doesn’t go to this school. I’ve only seen her waiting outside the school before and I saw Alicia run into her. They were chatting together about something outside the school.”
“Then what are you talking to me about this for? Go ask Alicia to hook you up or something, moron.”
“There’s no way I could go and do that. Are you crazy? It was only just a month ago that I was chasing after her. I’d look so shallow and pathetic if I went crawling to her begging for her to hook me up with her friend.”
I pictured the pathetic sight of Jass prostrating on the ground in front of Alicia begging for her to hook him up and couldn’t help but agree. That would be pretty awkward, not just for him, but for both parties.
“Look, it’s not like I have a direct connection to Alicia. The only connection I have is that my girlfriend is her friend. You’re asking the impossible.”
“Come on, just ask your girlfriend to talk to Alicia.”
“You can ask Rosa yourself.”
“How can I do that when not too long before Alicia I was chasing after her as well?”
“Ugh. Look, at this rate, it feels like if things don’t work out this time it’s going to turn into me trying to pull strings with my girlfriend to pull strings with Alicia to pull strings with Alicia’s friend to hook you up with their friend. This is a slippery slope man. I don’t want anything to do with this.”
“Please! You’re the best shot I have at connecting with that girl with how you’re Alicia’s best friend’s boyfriend!”
I can already predict the future. The next time I hear this line it’s going to be even longer. You’re the best shot I have at connecting with that girl with how you’re that girl’s friend of Alicia’s best friend’s boyfriend. Was that even correct? I felt like it wasn’t. I had a serious headache when I thought about it. How many layers deep would this idiot take things?
Would he ever stop?
The thought alone terrified me and sent shivers down my spine.
“I absolutely can’t help you with this.”
“Please! I’ll never ask you for anything again.”
“Never?”
“If… things go well.”
“Hell no. You’re on your own.”
“Please! I’m serious about this one!”
“Serious… about this one? Do you hear yourself right now? You jumped from Rosa, to her best friend, to the friend of Rosa’s best friend within seven months.”
“I know it sounds bad, but please believe me.”
“I’d be an idiot to believe you.”
“Unless I get a girlfriend, I’ll keep bugging you every single day until graduation.”
“No. You wouldn’t...”
“Are you doubting my persistence?”
When I thought about how many times he was shot down by Alicia in a single day, I trembled. If I had to deal with that level of persistence every day… it would be hell.
It really was in my best interest to hook this idiot up with someone. Just about anyone would do. This guy was too damn thirsty.
“Ugh… I guess… I can try to help you out. Anyway, do you know the girl’s name at least?”
“No idea.”
“Huh? How do you expect me to do anything without that at the bare minimum? I have to communicate this to Rosa for her to communicate it to Alicia. Without a name, it’d be impossible to do anything like this.”
“Well, I don’t know her name, but if you describe her, Alicia would definitely know who Rosa’s talking about. And since Rosa is best friends with Alicia, I’m sure she’ll know her name as well.”
“Look, Alicia has god knows how many fiends. It’d be a miracle if Rosa knows even 1% of their names. That’s especially the case when it comes to girls. She only knows guys since she typically doesn’t get along very well with most girls. She’d be just about as useless as I am when it comes to knowing girl’s names.”
“I see. Well, as long as you provide her with the description it’d be enough.”
“Okay, so? What’s the dead giveaway description of this girl?”
“She’s a gothic punk type of girl with short shoulder-length blue hair. She has two purple locks of hair that cross over the bridge of her nose. She’s got lip, tongue, and ear piercings. Three tattoos, a heart on her neck, a butterfly over her breasts, and a snake one over her belly. She wears black lipstick and paints her fingernails black.”
As he spoke, my expression turned dumber and dumber. My mouth was slightly open and the light in my eyes had completely drained.
“Long boots, fishnet stockings, a short black skirt. She was wearing a tight black tube top with strings holding it together at the front and a short-sleeved black jacket over it. Man, her cleavage was amazing dude. You shoulda seen it. That view… just thinking about it got me off ten times this last week.”
Can I die?
Why?
Why did it have to be Izora!
You absolute idiot!
I don’t want anything to do with this!
I collapsed on top of my desk and repeatedly banged my forehead hard against it trying to forget everything this idiot told me.
