Dani instantly sobered up.
“You what?” She asked.
It sounded as if Simon had just confessed feelings to Dani. Obviously that wasn’t right, she must have misheard him.
“I’m serious,” Simon said. His hands had started shake and his voice wavered. “I don’t know when it happened but… You just- We know each other a lot and for so long and…”
Is this for real? What the fuck is he doing? She began to sweat.
“Simon…” She couldn’t find the words.
“It started probably when you came out? I mean I’ve always cared about you a lot but I never considered myself gay. And I guess I still don’t now and-”
“Simon. What is wrong with you?” Dani said. It was highlighted by another mystery noise from Ryan hurling in the bathroom.
“What?” Simon’s jaw slacked a tiny bit.
“Why would you tell me that?” She found herself getting more upset as she spoke. “You’re literally dating Rachel! You literally just got upset with me for ‘making stuff awkward’ in the apartment and then you say that? What is wrong with you?”
Simon closed his mouth and took a subtle step back.
Dani followed him as she continued her rant. “And what did you want me to say back? You think I’d have feelings for someone who treats his current girlfriend like shit? You’re honestly lucky to have Rachel if this is how you are to her all the time. I would tell her about this if it wouldn’t out me.”
She let out a sharp sigh as she wound down.
Meanwhile Simon had just stood there, not moving or saying anything, or even reacting to what Dani had yelled at him.
I hope Ryan didn’t hear any of that. I should make sure he isn’t passed out in the toilet after this.
“Yeah,” Simon whispered. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
As he turned and rushed to his room, Dani swore she saw some tears in his eyes.
Fuck.
She cooled down as regret sank in.
I went way too hard there. I was right, though! But… Yeah, maybe could have worded some of that better.
The sound of the toilet flushing came from the bathroom, followed by Ryan somberly walking into the living room.
“You all good?” She asked him.
He trudged toward the couch and flung himself onto it before responding. “Gonna have to skip gym day tomorrow.”
***
The front door slammed shut, bringing Ryan to life. He was surprised to find himself on the couch. That is, until he remembered everything from the night before.
Huh. Dani actually kissed me. Or did I kiss her? Doesn’t matter I guess.
His much too familiar ‘I didn’t drink enough water last night’ headache began to set in. He forced himself up and to the kitchen where they kept the aspirin. As he downed a couple tablets with the rest of his water from the night before, he had to contemplate why he even got as drunk as he did in the first place.
All this drinking is starting to interfere with my workouts. And I’m sure my liver is on the verge of giving out. I don’t even drink unless it’s a party or I’m at a bar, what was I thinking? Getting blackout during a blackout?
He chuckled to himself. An image of Dani laughing a little to hard at his dumb jokes flashed into his head.
What even.. What are we supposed to do now? Fuck, what would Dad say if he knew I kissed a transgender.
Still, he couldn’t help but grin at the memory.
But it was nice, even if we were drunk. And she’s cute! Yeah… It’s kinda weird when she does her guy voice, though.
As if she could tell he was thinking about her, soft footsteps approached from the hallway. Ryan turned and saw Dani peeking around the corner into the kitchen. Her messy strands of red hair dangling against the wall stole his focus.
I wonder if she regrets what happened? She seemed in good spirits afterward, at least from what I can remember.
“You’re not some ninja, you know,” Ryan said.
Dani fully stepped out from the corner and into the kitchen. Ryan could tell she was nervous, from her slow, methodical movements. Not to mention her face was blushing bright pink.
“Sorry.” Dani tugged the sleeves of her old gray sweatshirt over her hands. “I wasn’t sure if you were awake or not yet. And then I heard the door slam and wasn’t sure what was up.”
“Must have been Simon leaving for work,” Ryan said.
He noticed Dani’s expression darken. Instead of looking innocent and sleepy, she looked concerned and reclusive.
Woah, is she that upset that Simon isn’t here?
“Crazy night, huh?” He asked.
Dani’s expression bounced right back to normal. “Yeah! I read a news article saying the blackout was caused by a tree falling and knocking out some power lines. Just like a freak thing.”
“Ah, really? So just a one time thing…” Ryan stepped toward the sink to refill his glass. “Probably won’t happen again?”
“Yup. Just a one time thing,” Dani murmured. “Super low chance of it happening again.”
As Ryan gulped down more water to mend his hangover, he couldn’t help but wonder…
“But it could happen again.” He raised his eyebrow and watched Dani carefully.
She tried to hide it by turning toward the fridge but he definitely caught a tiny smile on her.
“I guess it could, yeah,” She said while staring at their measly collection of magnets plastered on the refrigerator. “If the conditions were right again.”
Ryan was glad she was back to using her trained voice. He finally understood what Simon meant about it changing her whole perception.
“And if it happened again, that wouldn’t be the end of the world or anything,” he said.
Dani turned toward him, her eyebrows scrunched. “Well I guess, but why would you want the power to go out again?”
“What?” Ryan set down his glass and moved half a step closer. “I thought we were talking about the kiss. But like, a metaphor.”
In a millisecond Dani’s face turned a deep shade of red and she stepped back. “Wha- No I was literally talking about… Oh wow.”
“Sorry,” Ryan said. “My bad.”
I knew english class was all bullshit.
“It’s okay,” Dani said. Her face had gone back to the cute pinkish hue it was when she snuck up on him. “I guess we needed to talk about that. Right?”
“Right!” Ryan said. “That would be responsible.”
The two just stared at each other in silence, both waiting to see who would speak first.
Maybe we really should just call it a one time thing. What if things go poorly? We’ll still be living together. Could get super messy.
He saw Dani take a deep breath and straighten her back, just to let it out as a soft squeak and sink back down. Ryan couldn’t help but think of it as adorable and innocent.
Goddammit. Am I actually going to do this?
The thought of his less open-minded friends, or even worse, his father, finding out about this… It terrified him. And yet, the longer he looked at Dani, the more his worries and fears faded.
Fuck it. I’m not who I used to be. Dad can suck it.
Ryan puffed out his chest and spoke with all the strength his sick, aching body could muster. “I liked it. And… Wouldn’t mind if it happened again.”
Dani’s poor face, once again bright red. Ryan wasn’t sure if it would ever go back to the pale tone it was meant to have.
“Yeah?” Dani asked.
Ryan chuckled. “Yeah. I think you’re pretty cute.”
“Thanks,” Dani whispered to the floor.
“Wanna get some coffee maybe?” Ryan asked. “I need something to deal with this hangover. And we could chat a little more.”
“Yes!” Dani’s face lit up with a smile bigger than Ryan had ever seen on her. “Let me go get ready first. As you can see, I’m a sweaty mess.”
She scampered off to her room, leaving Ryan in the kitchen. Everything he had just said began to sink in.
I’m not who I used to be. He repeated the thought to himself over and over. I have to be better than him.
Dani instantly sobered up.
“You what?” She asked.
It sounded as if Simon had just confessed feelings to Dani. Obviously that wasn’t right, she must have misheard him.
“I’m serious,” Simon said. His hands had started shake and his voice wavered. “I don’t know when it happened but… You just- We know each other a lot and for so long and…”
Is this for real? What the fuck is he doing? She began to sweat.
“Simon…” She couldn’t find the words.
“It started probably when you came out? I mean I’ve always cared about you a lot but I never considered myself gay. And I guess I still don’t now and-”
“Simon. What is wrong with you?” Dani said. It was highlighted by another mystery noise from Ryan hurling in the bathroom.
“What?” Simon’s jaw slacked a tiny bit.
“Why would you tell me that?” She found herself getting more upset as she spoke. “You’re literally dating Rachel! You literally just got upset with me for ‘making stuff awkward’ in the apartment and then you say that? What is wrong with you?”
Simon closed his mouth and took a subtle step back.
Dani followed him as she continued her rant. “And what did you want me to say back? You think I’d have feelings for someone who treats his current girlfriend like shit? You’re honestly lucky to have Rachel if this is how you are to her all the time. I would tell her about this if it wouldn’t out me.”
She let out a sharp sigh as she wound down.
Meanwhile Simon had just stood there, not moving or saying anything, or even reacting to what Dani had yelled at him.
I hope Ryan didn’t hear any of that. I should make sure he isn’t passed out in the toilet after this.
“Yeah,” Simon whispered. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
As he turned and rushed to his room, Dani swore she saw some tears in his eyes.
Fuck.
She cooled down as regret sank in.
I went way too hard there. I was right, though! But… Yeah, maybe could have worded some of that better.
The sound of the toilet flushing came from the bathroom, followed by Ryan somberly walking into the living room.
“You all good?” She asked him.
He trudged toward the couch and flung himself onto it before responding. “Gonna have to skip gym day tomorrow.”
***
The front door slammed shut, bringing Ryan to life. He was surprised to find himself on the couch. That is, until he remembered everything from the night before.
Huh. Dani actually kissed me. Or did I kiss her? Doesn’t matter I guess.
His much too familiar ‘I didn’t drink enough water last night’ headache began to set in. He forced himself up and to the kitchen where they kept the aspirin. As he downed a couple tablets with the rest of his water from the night before, he had to contemplate why he even got as drunk as he did in the first place.
All this drinking is starting to interfere with my workouts. And I’m sure my liver is on the verge of giving out. I don’t even drink unless it’s a party or I’m at a bar, what was I thinking? Getting blackout during a blackout?
He chuckled to himself. An image of Dani laughing a little to hard at his dumb jokes flashed into his head.
What even.. What are we supposed to do now? Fuck, what would Dad say if he knew I kissed a transgender.
Still, he couldn’t help but grin at the memory.
But it was nice, even if we were drunk. And she’s cute! Yeah… It’s kinda weird when she does her guy voice, though.
As if she could tell he was thinking about her, soft footsteps approached from the hallway. Ryan turned and saw Dani peeking around the corner into the kitchen. Her messy strands of red hair dangling against the wall stole his focus.
I wonder if she regrets what happened? She seemed in good spirits afterward, at least from what I can remember.
“You’re not some ninja, you know,” Ryan said.
Dani fully stepped out from the corner and into the kitchen. Ryan could tell she was nervous, from her slow, methodical movements. Not to mention her face was blushing bright pink.
“Sorry.” Dani tugged the sleeves of her old gray sweatshirt over her hands. “I wasn’t sure if you were awake or not yet. And then I heard the door slam and wasn’t sure what was up.”
“Must have been Simon leaving for work,” Ryan said.
He noticed Dani’s expression darken. Instead of looking innocent and sleepy, she looked concerned and reclusive.
Woah, is she that upset that Simon isn’t here?
“Crazy night, huh?” He asked.
Dani’s expression bounced right back to normal. “Yeah! I read a news article saying the blackout was caused by a tree falling and knocking out some power lines. Just like a freak thing.”
“Ah, really? So just a one time thing…” Ryan stepped toward the sink to refill his glass. “Probably won’t happen again?”
“Yup. Just a one time thing,” Dani murmured. “Super low chance of it happening again.”
As Ryan gulped down more water to mend his hangover, he couldn’t help but wonder…
“But it could happen again.” He raised his eyebrow and watched Dani carefully.
She tried to hide it by turning toward the fridge but he definitely caught a tiny smile on her.
“I guess it could, yeah,” She said while staring at their measly collection of magnets plastered on the refrigerator. “If the conditions were right again.”
Ryan was glad she was back to using her trained voice. He finally understood what Simon meant about it changing her whole perception.
“And if it happened again, that wouldn’t be the end of the world or anything,” he said.
Dani turned toward him, her eyebrows scrunched. “Well I guess, but why would you want the power to go out again?”
“What?” Ryan set down his glass and moved half a step closer. “I thought we were talking about the kiss. But like, a metaphor.”
In a millisecond Dani’s face turned a deep shade of red and she stepped back. “Wha- No I was literally talking about… Oh wow.”
“Sorry,” Ryan said. “My bad.”
I knew english class was all bullshit.
“It’s okay,” Dani said. Her face had gone back to the cute pinkish hue it was when she snuck up on him. “I guess we needed to talk about that. Right?”
“Right!” Ryan said. “That would be responsible.”
The two just stared at each other in silence, both waiting to see who would speak first.
Maybe we really should just call it a one time thing. What if things go poorly? We’ll still be living together. Could get super messy.
He saw Dani take a deep breath and straighten her back, just to let it out as a soft squeak and sink back down. Ryan couldn’t help but think of it as adorable and innocent.
Goddammit. Am I actually going to do this?
The thought of his less open-minded friends, or even worse, his father, finding out about this… It terrified him. And yet, the longer he looked at Dani, the more his worries and fears faded.
Fuck it. I’m not who I used to be. Dad can suck it.
Ryan puffed out his chest and spoke with all the strength his sick, aching body could muster. “I liked it. And… Wouldn’t mind if it happened again.”
Dani’s poor face, once again bright red. Ryan wasn’t sure if it would ever go back to the pale tone it was meant to have.
“Yeah?” Dani asked.
Ryan chuckled. “Yeah. I think you’re pretty cute.”
“Thanks,” Dani whispered to the floor.
“Wanna get some coffee maybe?” Ryan asked. “I need something to deal with this hangover. And we could chat a little more.”
“Yes!” Dani’s face lit up with a smile bigger than Ryan had ever seen on her. “Let me go get ready first. As you can see, I’m a sweaty mess.”
She scampered off to her room, leaving Ryan in the kitchen. Everything he had just said began to sink in.
I’m not who I used to be. He repeated the thought to himself over and over. I have to be better than him.
