Chapter 290
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Chapter 290
Staring down the beak of the monstrous, armoured reptile laying at my literal doorstep, it takes every iota of courage I have to keep my voice calm and steady. Lin... Listen carefully. Im not mad, but you need to get off the turtle and send it back to where you found it.
Ignoring my instructions, Lin rests her chin on her hands and tilts her head, laying prone atop the giant turtles surprisingly flat head. Dont be silly hubby. I didnt call her here, she came on her own.
Shit. Fuck. God Dammit. And here I was hoping she had control of the giant armoured dinosaur. Okay... but you still need to get down. What the hell are her guards doing? Oh god, is Guard Leader strong enough to fight this thing? Do I want to find out? Maybe I can scare it off with my Aura, but Id like to be out of biting range before trying it out.
Dont wanna. Theres nothing to worry about Rainy, shes friendly ya? Reaching down, Lin rubs the turtle between its eyes and giggles as it raises its head in response to her gentle ministrations. See?
Freed from its gaze, Im finally able to look around and study the creature. Its not as round as Id expected, more of a bulky rectangle with spikes. Having raised its neck, I can see its belly is pressed flat against the ground, lacking the bulky bottom shell I expect to see on turtles. After a minute of Lins petting, the turtle shuffles its limbs back and forth and burrows its body into the loose dirt. Sinking into the earth at a rapid pace, it makes itself comfortable and lays its head at my feet, exhaling slowly as its eyelids close in peaceful slumber.
Letting go of a breath I didnt realized Id been holding, all the tension eases from my body as the threat passes. My retinue follows my cue with a collective sigh, lowering their readied weapons as they look to me for guidance. Giving the signal to disperse in silence, I pray theyre quiet enough not to disturb the sleeping giant. I suppose its possible weve encroached upon her favourite napping spot, but what are the chances?
Drained and exhausted by the brief yet harrowing turtle stare-down, I quietly ask Ravil for an explanation, which he gives in quiet whispers. According to the sentries, Ping Yaos Guardian Turtle burst out of the treeline faster than a galloping horse, but immediately slowed down at the sight of so many people. Patiently waiting for people to get out of her way, the turtle headed straight into the heart of our camp, moving ever so slowly until she stopped outside my yurt. There, she waited for several minutes until Ravil found the courage to come inside and disturb my meditation.
Weird. Why did the turtle come looking for me? It didnt care when I was a kilometre away this morning so why chase me down now? Did it sense Blobby while I was meditating? How though? My hands were soaking in a basin on water, detached from any other source.
Putting aside the why, I order Ravil to break camp as quietly as possible. Theres no way anyone is sleeping with a titanic turtle dozing nearby, but hopefully we can use this opportunity to get away. Cautiously moving closer, I reach out to Lin and motion for her to jump into my arms, to which she happily complies. With my wifey securely in my arms, I back away from the turtle one quiet, careful step at a time and slip into my yurt. While the wooden door and canvas walls wont keep her out, I feel safer with the turtle out of sight. Speaking ever so quietly so as not to disturb the slumbering behemoth, I whisper, Lin, what were you thinking? You could have seriously gotten hurt. I have half a mind to send you home!
Unfazed by my concerned anger, Lin flashes her toothy grin and answers in a normal volume. Dont worry, if it was dangerous, the guards would have stopped me, ya? Besides, you cant send me home. I dont hafta follow your orders. As if to prove her point, Lin sticks her tongue out and blows a raspberry.
I dont blame her for not taking me seriously, I hardly seem imposing while trembling from head to toe, the aftereffects of too much adrenaline coursing through my veins. To make matters worse, Lins tousled hair and wrinkled night-clothes lend a sensual, seductive air to her impish smile, her cheeks flushed with excitement as she snuggles in my embrace. Sometime while I wasnt looking, my adorable Lin blossomed into an alluring young lady, her fresh-faced innocence almost impossible to resist.
But resist I must. Calm down little Rain, you dont want to do anything thatll disappoint Taduk, and despoiling his only daughter before our wedding night certainly makes the list.
Oblivious to my inner struggle, Lin continues to defend her earlier actions. Plus, Ping-Ping is a gentle sweetheart Rainy. She didnt hurt anyone or break anything on her way in, ya?
No. Dont name her. Putting Lin down, I grab a stray blanket and warp it around her shoulders, doing my best to resist her innocent charms. Were not keeping the turtle.
Why not?
Because I said so. Tempting though it may be, the turtle is too terrifying. I dont care how gentle or careful she is, Ping-Ping is one careless misstep away from turning someone into meat paste. God dammit, Lin has worse naming sense than I do. Ping-Ping is hardly what youd call a gargantuan, armoured, apex predator. Look at how scared Aurie and Mafu are, my poor babies are shivering. The two cowards in question lay cuddled together on the bed, their fear having gone unnoticed in my earlier haste to follow Ravil out. Soon as Ravil gives the all clear, were gone. Well leave this yurt behind, no point taking needless risks.
Running over to the cowardly animals, Lin giggles as she joins their dog-pile. You big floofs are so silly. Ping-Ping wont hurt anyone, dont you worry. Looking up, she asks, What about daddy? Hes not back yet.
Choking back my squeal of delight, I take in the sight of Taduks gift, a tiny, scared bunny the size of my palm. Sporting a beautiful, black, short-furred coat with a white underbelly, his nose and eyes are also lined with white to give its features a lovely contrast. Although bigger than Mama Buns babies, this bunny is leaner than his new siblings and much more vigilant. Where the other bunnies would happily hop around and explore their surroundings, this new bunny, who Ive already named Blackjack, stands stock still with arms and legs poised to fight or flee.
Resting my cheek against the table, I eye my newest pet with a smile. Hiya cutie. Did Teacher find you in the wild? Reacting to the sound of my voice, Blackjack turns to face me head on, nose twitching a mile a minute. So cute. It looks different from the other bunnies, more alert and jumpy, but I guess its because hes a wild one. Placing my right hand flat on the table, I slowly slide it towards Blackjack one centimetre at a time, doing my best not to spook it. Dont be scared, everythings gonna be fine. The big scary turtle wont eat you. Why dont you come with me and meet your new family? Its gonna be so fun. I hope Blackjack is a boy and Tawny One is a girl, then they can be a couple with themed names. Letting him sniff the back of my fingers, I wait until Blackjack seems comfortable with my smell before moving to pick him up. Come here my sweet bun bun, lets get you something to eat and Ahhhhhhh!
A shrill screech emerges from my mouth as Blackjack chomps down on my index finger and tears away the top joint. Cheeks working furiously, it swallows the morsel and bares its fangs to reveal four bloody incisors. Clutching at my wounded finger close, I hiss in pain and ask, What the fuck is that?
That, my boy, Taduk says, swelling with pride, is a Cloud Chaser Hare. See how fierce it is? A predator born, destined to rule the treetops and skies. Sneering at Mama Bun, he adds, Far more majestic than any mere rabbit.
Uhh... Yea. Thank you. I guess. Stopping the bleeding with an effort of will, I wash away most of my blood with some tea. Very cute.
Just my daily reminder of how everything in this world is looking to kill or eat me. Fun, fun, fun.
Put the fur-bag away. Placing her teacup down, Guard Leader stands and faces the forest. We have company.
Turning to follow her gaze, I watch as a group of people file out of the forest from the gap Ping-Ping left in her wake. Numbering close to a hundred strong, their shabby, hemp clothing, straw cloaks, and conical hats mark them as woodsmen or commoners, but their weapons tell a different story. Spears, swords, axes, and bows bristle as they form up in battle-lines with practised efficiency. Responding in kind, my retinue also moves into formation, but instead of lining up shoulder to shoulder in the open, Joranis people take cover behind wagons and half-dismantled yurts, readying their bows and crossbows for my signal. Off to the side, Chey slips away on quinback with her entire squad, hoping to circle around and flank our enemy while Wang Bao and his cutthroats make their way to the front, hefting makeshift shields to defend against the first barrage. Carrying yurt doors, folding chairs, pot lids, and anything else which might stop an arrow, the former Butcher Bay veterans sneer confidently as they prepare for battle.
Looks like months of training have borne fruit, but my people deserve to be confident. Clad in garo leather armour and armed with the best weapons money can buy, we also outnumber our enemy by more than two to one, unless they have more warriors hiding in the woods. Doesn't matter if they do, Chey and her quins will make short work of anyone they find.
Trapping the blood-thirsty hare beneath my water basin, I hurry over to join the front lines. Giving Ravil, Pran, and Saluk the order to load their guns and aim for the enemy leaders, I strap on Tranquility and draw Peace while quietly cursing over the loss of my finger tip. Makes it harder to keep a firm grip on my sword, but hopefully things dont escalate that far. Holding my Officers token up for the intruders to see, I yell, This is Warrant Officer Second Grade Falling Rain. State your intentions, or die where you stand.
Woo... Chills. I can see why people love being arrogant, its pretty fun.
The rabble of woodsmen-turned-soldier dont like what they hear, as evidenced by their disgruntled looks and hushed arguments. Giving them a minute to sort things out, I stand tall and proud with hand held high, wondering if I should keep it up or put it down. Maybe physically seeing the token will scare them off, but an argument could be made that it looks like Im hiding behind my rank.
Dilemma...
After a short discussion, one scruffy warrior steps forward and responds, blissfully ignorant of how much danger hes really in, staring down the barrel of Ravil's gun. Drawing himself up to full height, the enemy leader yells back, We do not fear death. Release the Divine Turtle or face Ping Yaos wrath!
Oh, its the turtle ninjas. Thank the Mother. Glancing back at Ping-Ping, I yell, Okay. Wait one second. I'll go get her. Stopping in my tracks, I turn back to the turtle ninjas and add, Actually, maybe it's better if you go to her. She's napping.
Well, thats one scary, dangerous pet taken care of. Now what am I supposed to do with a voracious, meat-eating, cloud-hopping hare?
Man... All I wanted was a cuddly, adorable red panda.
Chapter Meme
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Chapter 290
Staring down the beak of the monstrous, armoured reptile laying at my literal doorstep, it takes every iota of courage I have to keep my voice calm and steady. Lin... Listen carefully. Im not mad, but you need to get off the turtle and send it back to where you found it.
Ignoring my instructions, Lin rests her chin on her hands and tilts her head, laying prone atop the giant turtles surprisingly flat head. Dont be silly hubby. I didnt call her here, she came on her own.
Shit. Fuck. God Dammit. And here I was hoping she had control of the giant armoured dinosaur. Okay... but you still need to get down. What the hell are her guards doing? Oh god, is Guard Leader strong enough to fight this thing? Do I want to find out? Maybe I can scare it off with my Aura, but Id like to be out of biting range before trying it out.
Dont wanna. Theres nothing to worry about Rainy, shes friendly ya? Reaching down, Lin rubs the turtle between its eyes and giggles as it raises its head in response to her gentle ministrations. See?
Freed from its gaze, Im finally able to look around and study the creature. Its not as round as Id expected, more of a bulky rectangle with spikes. Having raised its neck, I can see its belly is pressed flat against the ground, lacking the bulky bottom shell I expect to see on turtles. After a minute of Lins petting, the turtle shuffles its limbs back and forth and burrows its body into the loose dirt. Sinking into the earth at a rapid pace, it makes itself comfortable and lays its head at my feet, exhaling slowly as its eyelids close in peaceful slumber.
Letting go of a breath I didnt realized Id been holding, all the tension eases from my body as the threat passes. My retinue follows my cue with a collective sigh, lowering their readied weapons as they look to me for guidance. Giving the signal to disperse in silence, I pray theyre quiet enough not to disturb the sleeping giant. I suppose its possible weve encroached upon her favourite napping spot, but what are the chances?
Drained and exhausted by the brief yet harrowing turtle stare-down, I quietly ask Ravil for an explanation, which he gives in quiet whispers. According to the sentries, Ping Yaos Guardian Turtle burst out of the treeline faster than a galloping horse, but immediately slowed down at the sight of so many people. Patiently waiting for people to get out of her way, the turtle headed straight into the heart of our camp, moving ever so slowly until she stopped outside my yurt. There, she waited for several minutes until Ravil found the courage to come inside and disturb my meditation.
Weird. Why did the turtle come looking for me? It didnt care when I was a kilometre away this morning so why chase me down now? Did it sense Blobby while I was meditating? How though? My hands were soaking in a basin on water, detached from any other source.
Putting aside the why, I order Ravil to break camp as quietly as possible. Theres no way anyone is sleeping with a titanic turtle dozing nearby, but hopefully we can use this opportunity to get away. Cautiously moving closer, I reach out to Lin and motion for her to jump into my arms, to which she happily complies. With my wifey securely in my arms, I back away from the turtle one quiet, careful step at a time and slip into my yurt. While the wooden door and canvas walls wont keep her out, I feel safer with the turtle out of sight. Speaking ever so quietly so as not to disturb the slumbering behemoth, I whisper, Lin, what were you thinking? You could have seriously gotten hurt. I have half a mind to send you home!
Unfazed by my concerned anger, Lin flashes her toothy grin and answers in a normal volume. Dont worry, if it was dangerous, the guards would have stopped me, ya? Besides, you cant send me home. I dont hafta follow your orders. As if to prove her point, Lin sticks her tongue out and blows a raspberry.
I dont blame her for not taking me seriously, I hardly seem imposing while trembling from head to toe, the aftereffects of too much adrenaline coursing through my veins. To make matters worse, Lins tousled hair and wrinkled night-clothes lend a sensual, seductive air to her impish smile, her cheeks flushed with excitement as she snuggles in my embrace. Sometime while I wasnt looking, my adorable Lin blossomed into an alluring young lady, her fresh-faced innocence almost impossible to resist.
But resist I must. Calm down little Rain, you dont want to do anything thatll disappoint Taduk, and despoiling his only daughter before our wedding night certainly makes the list.
Oblivious to my inner struggle, Lin continues to defend her earlier actions. Plus, Ping-Ping is a gentle sweetheart Rainy. She didnt hurt anyone or break anything on her way in, ya?
No. Dont name her. Putting Lin down, I grab a stray blanket and warp it around her shoulders, doing my best to resist her innocent charms. Were not keeping the turtle.
Why not?
Because I said so. Tempting though it may be, the turtle is too terrifying. I dont care how gentle or careful she is, Ping-Ping is one careless misstep away from turning someone into meat paste. God dammit, Lin has worse naming sense than I do. Ping-Ping is hardly what youd call a gargantuan, armoured, apex predator. Look at how scared Aurie and Mafu are, my poor babies are shivering. The two cowards in question lay cuddled together on the bed, their fear having gone unnoticed in my earlier haste to follow Ravil out. Soon as Ravil gives the all clear, were gone. Well leave this yurt behind, no point taking needless risks.
Running over to the cowardly animals, Lin giggles as she joins their dog-pile. You big floofs are so silly. Ping-Ping wont hurt anyone, dont you worry. Looking up, she asks, What about daddy? Hes not back yet.
Choking back my squeal of delight, I take in the sight of Taduks gift, a tiny, scared bunny the size of my palm. Sporting a beautiful, black, short-furred coat with a white underbelly, his nose and eyes are also lined with white to give its features a lovely contrast. Although bigger than Mama Buns babies, this bunny is leaner than his new siblings and much more vigilant. Where the other bunnies would happily hop around and explore their surroundings, this new bunny, who Ive already named Blackjack, stands stock still with arms and legs poised to fight or flee.
Resting my cheek against the table, I eye my newest pet with a smile. Hiya cutie. Did Teacher find you in the wild? Reacting to the sound of my voice, Blackjack turns to face me head on, nose twitching a mile a minute. So cute. It looks different from the other bunnies, more alert and jumpy, but I guess its because hes a wild one. Placing my right hand flat on the table, I slowly slide it towards Blackjack one centimetre at a time, doing my best not to spook it. Dont be scared, everythings gonna be fine. The big scary turtle wont eat you. Why dont you come with me and meet your new family? Its gonna be so fun. I hope Blackjack is a boy and Tawny One is a girl, then they can be a couple with themed names. Letting him sniff the back of my fingers, I wait until Blackjack seems comfortable with my smell before moving to pick him up. Come here my sweet bun bun, lets get you something to eat and Ahhhhhhh!
A shrill screech emerges from my mouth as Blackjack chomps down on my index finger and tears away the top joint. Cheeks working furiously, it swallows the morsel and bares its fangs to reveal four bloody incisors. Clutching at my wounded finger close, I hiss in pain and ask, What the fuck is that?
That, my boy, Taduk says, swelling with pride, is a Cloud Chaser Hare. See how fierce it is? A predator born, destined to rule the treetops and skies. Sneering at Mama Bun, he adds, Far more majestic than any mere rabbit.
Uhh... Yea. Thank you. I guess. Stopping the bleeding with an effort of will, I wash away most of my blood with some tea. Very cute.
Just my daily reminder of how everything in this world is looking to kill or eat me. Fun, fun, fun.
Put the fur-bag away. Placing her teacup down, Guard Leader stands and faces the forest. We have company.
Turning to follow her gaze, I watch as a group of people file out of the forest from the gap Ping-Ping left in her wake. Numbering close to a hundred strong, their shabby, hemp clothing, straw cloaks, and conical hats mark them as woodsmen or commoners, but their weapons tell a different story. Spears, swords, axes, and bows bristle as they form up in battle-lines with practised efficiency. Responding in kind, my retinue also moves into formation, but instead of lining up shoulder to shoulder in the open, Joranis people take cover behind wagons and half-dismantled yurts, readying their bows and crossbows for my signal. Off to the side, Chey slips away on quinback with her entire squad, hoping to circle around and flank our enemy while Wang Bao and his cutthroats make their way to the front, hefting makeshift shields to defend against the first barrage. Carrying yurt doors, folding chairs, pot lids, and anything else which might stop an arrow, the former Butcher Bay veterans sneer confidently as they prepare for battle.
Looks like months of training have borne fruit, but my people deserve to be confident. Clad in garo leather armour and armed with the best weapons money can buy, we also outnumber our enemy by more than two to one, unless they have more warriors hiding in the woods. Doesn't matter if they do, Chey and her quins will make short work of anyone they find.
Trapping the blood-thirsty hare beneath my water basin, I hurry over to join the front lines. Giving Ravil, Pran, and Saluk the order to load their guns and aim for the enemy leaders, I strap on Tranquility and draw Peace while quietly cursing over the loss of my finger tip. Makes it harder to keep a firm grip on my sword, but hopefully things dont escalate that far. Holding my Officers token up for the intruders to see, I yell, This is Warrant Officer Second Grade Falling Rain. State your intentions, or die where you stand.
Woo... Chills. I can see why people love being arrogant, its pretty fun.
The rabble of woodsmen-turned-soldier dont like what they hear, as evidenced by their disgruntled looks and hushed arguments. Giving them a minute to sort things out, I stand tall and proud with hand held high, wondering if I should keep it up or put it down. Maybe physically seeing the token will scare them off, but an argument could be made that it looks like Im hiding behind my rank.
Dilemma...
After a short discussion, one scruffy warrior steps forward and responds, blissfully ignorant of how much danger hes really in, staring down the barrel of Ravil's gun. Drawing himself up to full height, the enemy leader yells back, We do not fear death. Release the Divine Turtle or face Ping Yaos wrath!
Oh, its the turtle ninjas. Thank the Mother. Glancing back at Ping-Ping, I yell, Okay. Wait one second. I'll go get her. Stopping in my tracks, I turn back to the turtle ninjas and add, Actually, maybe it's better if you go to her. She's napping.
Well, thats one scary, dangerous pet taken care of. Now what am I supposed to do with a voracious, meat-eating, cloud-hopping hare?
Man... All I wanted was a cuddly, adorable red panda.
Chapter Meme
Chapter 290Staring down the beak of the monstrous, armoured reptile laying at my literal doorstep, it takes every iota of courage I have to keep my voice calm and steady. Lin... Listen carefully. Im not mad, but you need to get off the turtle and send it back to where you found it.Ignoring my instructions, Lin rests her chin on her hands and tilts her head, laying prone atop the giant turtles surprisingly flat head. Dont be silly hubby. I didnt call her here, she came on her own.Shit. Fuck. God Dammit. And here I was hoping she had control of the giant armoured dinosaur. Okay... but you still need to get down. What the hell are her guards doing? Oh god, is Guard Leader strong enough to fight this thing? Do I want to find out? Maybe I can scare it off with my Aura, but Id like to be out of biting range before trying it out.Dont wanna. Theres nothing to worry about Rainy, shes friendly ya? Reaching down, Lin rubs the turtle between its eyes and giggles as it raises its head in response to her gentle ministrations. See?Freed from its gaze, Im finally able to look around and study the creature. Its not as round as Id expected, more of a bulky rectangle with spikes. Having raised its neck, I can see its belly is pressed flat against the ground, lacking the bulky bottom shell I expect to see on turtles. After a minute of Lins petting, the turtle shuffles its limbs back and forth and burrows its body into the loose dirt. Sinking into the earth at a rapid pace, it makes itself comfortable and lays its head at my feet, exhaling slowly as its eyelids close in peaceful slumber.Letting go of a breath I didnt realized Id been holding, all the tension eases from my body as the threat passes. My retinue follows my cue with a collective sigh, lowering their readied weapons as they look to me for guidance. Giving the signal to disperse in silence, I pray theyre quiet enough not to disturb the sleeping giant. I suppose its possible weve encroached upon her favourite napping spot, but what are the chances?Drained and exhausted by the brief yet harrowing turtle stare-down, I quietly ask Ravil for an explanation, which he gives in quiet whispers. According to the sentries, Ping Yaos Guardian Turtle burst out of the treeline faster than a galloping horse, but immediately slowed down at the sight of so many people. Patiently waiting for people to get out of her way, the turtle headed straight into the heart of our camp, moving ever so slowly until she stopped outside my yurt. There, she waited for several minutes until Ravil found the courage to come inside and disturb my meditation.Weird. Why did the turtle come looking for me? It didnt care when I was a kilometre away this morning so why chase me down now? Did it sense Blobby while I was meditating? How though? My hands were soaking in a basin on water, detached from any other source.Putting aside the why, I order Ravil to break camp as quietly as possible. Theres no way anyone is sleeping with a titanic turtle dozing nearby, but hopefully we can use this opportunity to get away. Cautiously moving closer, I reach out to Lin and motion for her to jump into my arms, to which she happily complies. With my wifey securely in my arms, I back away from the turtle one quiet, careful step at a time and slip into my yurt. While the wooden door and canvas walls wont keep her out, I feel safer with the turtle out of sight. Speaking ever so quietly so as not to disturb the slumbering behemoth, I whisper, Lin, what were you thinking? You could have seriously gotten hurt. I have half a mind to send you home!Unfazed by my concerned anger, Lin flashes her toothy grin and answers in a normal volume. Dont worry, if it was dangerous, the guards would have stopped me, ya? Besides, you cant send me home. I dont hafta follow your orders. As if to prove her point, Lin sticks her tongue out and blows a raspberry.I dont blame her for not taking me seriously, I hardly seem imposing while trembling from head to toe, the aftereffects of too much adrenaline coursing through my veins. To make matters worse, Lins tousled hair and wrinkled night-clothes lend a sensual, seductive air to her impish smile, her cheeks flushed with excitement as she snuggles in my embrace. Sometime while I wasnt looking, my adorable Lin blossomed into an alluring young lady, her fresh-faced innocence almost impossible to resist.But resist I must. Calm down little Rain, you dont want to do anything thatll disappoint Taduk, and despoiling his only daughter before our wedding night certainly makes the list.Oblivious to my inner struggle, Lin continues to defend her earlier actions. Plus, Ping-Ping is a gentle sweetheart Rainy. She didnt hurt anyone or break anything on her way in, ya?No. Dont name her. Putting Lin down, I grab a stray blanket and warp it around her shoulders, doing my best to resist her innocent charms. Were not keeping the turtle.Why not?Because I said so. Tempting though it may be, the turtle is too terrifying. I dont care how gentle or careful she is, Ping-Ping is one careless misstep away from turning someone into meat paste. God dammit, Lin has worse naming sense than I do. Ping-Ping is hardly what youd call a gargantuan, armoured, apex predator. Look at how scared Aurie and Mafu are, my poor babies are shivering. The two cowards in question lay cuddled together on the bed, their fear having gone unnoticed in my earlier haste to follow Ravil out. Soon as Ravil gives the all clear, were gone. Well leave this yurt behind, no point taking needless risks.Running over to the cowardly animals, Lin giggles as she joins their dog-pile. You big floofs are so silly. Ping-Ping wont hurt anyone, dont you worry. Looking up, she asks, What about daddy? Hes not back yet.Choking back my squeal of delight, I take in the sight of Taduks gift, a tiny, scared bunny the size of my palm. Sporting a beautiful, black, short-furred coat with a white underbelly, his nose and eyes are also lined with white to give its features a lovely contrast. Although bigger than Mama Buns babies, this bunny is leaner than his new siblings and much more vigilant. Where the other bunnies would happily hop around and explore their surroundings, this new bunny, who Ive already named Blackjack, stands stock still with arms and legs poised to fight or flee.Resting my cheek against the table, I eye my newest pet with a smile. Hiya cutie. Did Teacher find you in the wild? Reacting to the sound of my voice, Blackjack turns to face me head on, nose twitching a mile a minute. So cute. It looks different from the other bunnies, more alert and jumpy, but I guess its because hes a wild one. Placing my right hand flat on the table, I slowly slide it towards Blackjack one centimetre at a time, doing my best not to spook it. Dont be scared, everythings gonna be fine. The big scary turtle wont eat you. Why dont you come with me and meet your new family? Its gonna be so fun. I hope Blackjack is a boy and Tawny One is a girl, then they can be a couple with themed names. Letting him sniff the back of my fingers, I wait until Blackjack seems comfortable with my smell before moving to pick him up. Come here my sweet bun bun, lets get you something to eat and Ahhhhhhh!A shrill screech emerges from my mouth as Blackjack chomps down on my index finger and tears away the top joint. Cheeks working furiously, it swallows the morsel and bares its fangs to reveal four bloody incisors. Clutching at my wounded finger close, I hiss in pain and ask, What the fuck is that?That, my boy, Taduk says, swelling with pride, is a Cloud Chaser Hare. See how fierce it is? A predator born, destined to rule the treetops and skies. Sneering at Mama Bun, he adds, Far more majestic than any mere rabbit.Uhh... Yea. Thank you. I guess. Stopping the bleeding with an effort of will, I wash away most of my blood with some tea. Very cute.Just my daily reminder of how everything in this world is looking to kill or eat me. Fun, fun, fun.Put the fur-bag away. Placing her teacup down, Guard Leader stands and faces the forest. We have company.Turning to follow her gaze, I watch as a group of people file out of the forest from the gap Ping-Ping left in her wake. Numbering close to a hundred strong, their shabby, hemp clothing, straw cloaks, and conical hats mark them as woodsmen or commoners, but their weapons tell a different story. Spears, swords, axes, and bows bristle as they form up in battle-lines with practised efficiency. Responding in kind, my retinue also moves into formation, but instead of lining up shoulder to shoulder in the open, Joranis people take cover behind wagons and half-dismantled yurts, readying their bows and crossbows for my signal. Off to the side, Chey slips away on quinback with her entire squad, hoping to circle around and flank our enemy while Wang Bao and his cutthroats make their way to the front, hefting makeshift shields to defend against the first barrage. Carrying yurt doors, folding chairs, pot lids, and anything else which might stop an arrow, the former Butcher Bay veterans sneer confidently as they prepare for battle.Looks like months of training have borne fruit, but my people deserve to be confident. Clad in garo leather armour and armed with the best weapons money can buy, we also outnumber our enemy by more than two to one, unless they have more warriors hiding in the woods. Doesn't matter if they do, Chey and her quins will make short work of anyone they find.Trapping the blood-thirsty hare beneath my water basin, I hurry over to join the front lines. Giving Ravil, Pran, and Saluk the order to load their guns and aim for the enemy leaders, I strap on Tranquility and draw Peace while quietly cursing over the loss of my finger tip. Makes it harder to keep a firm grip on my sword, but hopefully things dont escalate that far. Holding my Officers token up for the intruders to see, I yell, This is Warrant Officer Second Grade Falling Rain. State your intentions, or die where you stand.Woo... Chills. I can see why people love being arrogant, its pretty fun.The rabble of woodsmen-turned-soldier dont like what they hear, as evidenced by their disgruntled looks and hushed arguments. Giving them a minute to sort things out, I stand tall and proud with hand held high, wondering if I should keep it up or put it down. Maybe physically seeing the token will scare them off, but an argument could be made that it looks like Im hiding behind my rank.Dilemma...After a short discussion, one scruffy warrior steps forward and responds, blissfully ignorant of how much danger hes really in, staring down the barrel of Ravil's gun. Drawing himself up to full height, the enemy leader yells back, We do not fear death. Release the Divine Turtle or face Ping Yaos wrath!Oh, its the turtle ninjas. Thank the Mother. Glancing back at Ping-Ping, I yell, Okay. Wait one second. I'll go get her. Stopping in my tracks, I turn back to the turtle ninjas and add, Actually, maybe it's better if you go to her. She's napping.Well, thats one scary, dangerous pet taken care of. Now what am I supposed to do with a voracious, meat-eating, cloud-hopping hare?Man... All I wanted was a cuddly, adorable red panda.Chapter Meme
