After Philip calmed down, he pondered more deeply about this matter.
"By that time, I had already upgraded my Mental stat above 15 and had partially summoned my astral body when using my so-called 'Spatial Cognitive State'. From that, I should also be able to see other astral projections. So, since I didn't notice someone lurking at Alma Inn, it was highly likely that my true child body was still not known.'
'However, it was different for his Raven identity. Someone should have seen him.' Philip covered his face in frustration. He made a mistake. A huge one!
'This is not only because of my ignorance, it is also a matter of lack of skills,' Philip thought. 'No. It's more like a disharmony in my skills.'
Since arriving in the city, Philip had always felt he was easily angered and was very immature. If only he was what he used to be before reincarnation, he should have maintained calmness and repeatedly considered his plans to make it perfect.
Since the first day, he had already committed mistake after mistake. If he was just like before, he should have already leveled up his uniqueness to avoid being discovered by the Davies siblings.
And if he was really what he used to be, he would have never agreed to Conrad's request and impersonated him. He should have adhered to his plan and not let his pity overpowered him.
Moreover, since he knew that the world is different, he should have always kept it in his mind and made it the basis for the plans he formulated.
It was then at this time, Philip realized the truth. What he experienced in his previous book life is slowly losing its influence on him. He realized that when he was reborn into this world, he was changed into a blank slate.
All the skills he honed and all the struggles he overcame were nothing but an illusion!
'I knew I experienced them and I understand how my life went. However, I feel that everything was just something I spectated and not personally experienced.'
He undoubtedly had the skills and learned them, but as for application? He felt he had none.
It was like watching your mother cook every day but when you did it on your own, the product was totally different from what had expected and not up to the standard.
"Hahaha," Philip laughed, this realization hit him hard and broke him.
At the same time, he felt confused. If this was the truth, how did he survive in the past? How did he manage to fool the mercenaries with a bear trap and with the so-called God's messenger? How about the steam locomotive? How did he manage to do them?
As Philip looked back, he felt cringe at the way he acted. He believed his acting wasn't that great and very foolish. It was as though he was a clown acting for theatre.
'I am like a kid playing around and acting as an adult. Yes, I finally realized. I had never been an adult but a child all along. What's different with me to other children is that I had dreamed that I was a hero in the past and gained some maturity over it.'
Philip felt that something stirred inside his mind as though a rope had snapped. Instantly, he dropped to the floor while touching his aching head.
Suddenly, a bell chimed inside his head, indicating a system's new notification.
Even without looking, he knew what it was and was now sure that he could finally open the illusionary door.
Without hesitation, he entered into his astral form and walked to the nearest bare wall. He extended his arm and willed all the pinkish hues in his body to rush over the wall.
When the door materialized, it bore the familiar symbols of snowflakes and dried leaves. However, the starlight peeping behind was replaced with dark and weeping clouds.
Philip turned the handle and finally entered it. When he passed through the door, he was welcomed by a field crammed with pampas grasses swaying with the strong wind.
The area was dark and threatening. It was as though something dangerous was hiding under the grasses.
As Philip walked inside his space of consciousness, large droplets of water poured over his face. And the more he walked, the more he got wet.
However, he didn't mind them as all of his thoughts were on walking.
Along with the muddy ground and the strong wind hitting his face, Philip's gaze was similarly dark and empty.
However, unlike his face, his feat was active and brimming with strength. Strangely, they were attracted to whatever was on the edge of his space of consciousness.
The longer he walked, the more purple crystals he found floating above the grass field. If it weren't for their light illuminating the field, Philip would have found himself walking in pitch-black surroundings, not knowing where to go and where he was.
Soon, his eyes finally caught a gigantic diamond-shaped rock formation floating on the far end. Separating Philip and the rock in between was a seemingly endless gap.
Upon reaching the end of the cliff, Philip dazedly looked at the floating island that appeared to be diffused by void and surrounded by falling black snowflakes.
Philip sensed a strong connection within it. He felt desolation, loneliness, surrender, hopelessness, and a bit of anger. It was as if all his negative emotions were locked on that island.
Although the island was gigantic, Philip noticed that it had nothing aside from a small woven basket in the center. Moreover, this basket seemed to be the source of the void and chaotic emotions around.
The more Philip examined the island, the more he felt he wanted to surrender. He was starting to believe that everything he did was without a purpose - that his life was nothing but insignificant and without use.
Philip's gaze dimmed even more and unconsciously extended his arm to the nearest floating purple crystal.
When he caught the crystal, it suddenly transformed into an old pistol, and immediately pointed the barrel to his head.
But when he was about to pull the trigger, his peripheral view noticed a floating island 100 times smaller than the gigantic island.
It was very small and almost unnoticeable. But despite this, Philip could not help but be enamored by it.
The small island cast a golden radiance around it. In the center, A tree larger and taller than the island firmly stood with dry leaves falling to the ground.
Philip dropped the gun on the floor and hurriedly walked to the bridge that connected the cliff to the floating island.
And when he touched the handrail, the bridge glowed, and dried golden leaves danced in the air with him at the center.
After seemingly a long walk, Philip's left foot finally touched the edge of the island. But when he was about to move his right foot, he was stopped by a transparent semi-circular wall and could only observe the island on the bridge.
In addition to the tall tree, there were also a few animals and insects playing around. On the corner, a cabin house with flowers surrounding it was seen.
Seeing this, Philip felt happiness, normality, haven, peace, and salvation.
Philip's gaze lightened, and the rain finally stopped. The gloomy clouds also began to disperse, showing a sun in the sky, seemingly smiling at him. He also smiled and let the sunlight touch his skin as he continued observing the small island.
He noticed that it influenced him and gave him the tenacity to live and move forward.
It was also at this time he realized things.
How did he fool the mercenaries, Steve, and Loen in the past? It was because this special small island he unlocked could influence other people.
The more he believes something is the truth, the more he influences others to move in the direction he wants to.
From the bear trap, instead of the mercenaries dividing into two teams, all of them searched above the trees to look for him, totally inconsistent with those who had a lot of experience in the area.
As for them believing in him as if he were the messenger of god, this was also due to his core memory's influence. From the start, they should have not believed in him as he was not only dirty but also frightened. Additionally, why would a messenger of God hide in the forest and be injured? Aren't all those close to God powerful?
As for Steve, he should have never hired Raven as his strength was very abnormal to appear in a small town. Moreover, the reason he whispered the magic word while he was with Raven was most likely also due to being influenced by Philip's thoughts and goals.
Philip laughed. He finally found out the inconsistency. He was indeed right, he was only a blank state that acted as if he was all along an experienced person.
Philip left the island and slowly walked to the grassy field, he faced the blue sky above and said under his breath,
"I walk in the dreams I believe to be the truths."
-End (Dreamwalker)
After Philip calmed down, he pondered more deeply about this matter.
"By that time, I had already upgraded my Mental stat above 15 and had partially summoned my astral body when using my so-called 'Spatial Cognitive State'. From that, I should also be able to see other astral projections. So, since I didn't notice someone lurking at Alma Inn, it was highly likely that my true child body was still not known.'
'However, it was different for his Raven identity. Someone should have seen him.' Philip covered his face in frustration. He made a mistake. A huge one!
'This is not only because of my ignorance, it is also a matter of lack of skills,' Philip thought. 'No. It's more like a disharmony in my skills.'
Since arriving in the city, Philip had always felt he was easily angered and was very immature. If only he was what he used to be before reincarnation, he should have maintained calmness and repeatedly considered his plans to make it perfect.
Since the first day, he had already committed mistake after mistake. If he was just like before, he should have already leveled up his uniqueness to avoid being discovered by the Davies siblings.
And if he was really what he used to be, he would have never agreed to Conrad's request and impersonated him. He should have adhered to his plan and not let his pity overpowered him.
Moreover, since he knew that the world is different, he should have always kept it in his mind and made it the basis for the plans he formulated.
It was then at this time, Philip realized the truth. What he experienced in his previous book life is slowly losing its influence on him. He realized that when he was reborn into this world, he was changed into a blank slate.
All the skills he honed and all the struggles he overcame were nothing but an illusion!
'I knew I experienced them and I understand how my life went. However, I feel that everything was just something I spectated and not personally experienced.'
He undoubtedly had the skills and learned them, but as for application? He felt he had none.
It was like watching your mother cook every day but when you did it on your own, the product was totally different from what had expected and not up to the standard.
"Hahaha," Philip laughed, this realization hit him hard and broke him.
At the same time, he felt confused. If this was the truth, how did he survive in the past? How did he manage to fool the mercenaries with a bear trap and with the so-called God's messenger? How about the steam locomotive? How did he manage to do them?
As Philip looked back, he felt cringe at the way he acted. He believed his acting wasn't that great and very foolish. It was as though he was a clown acting for theatre.
'I am like a kid playing around and acting as an adult. Yes, I finally realized. I had never been an adult but a child all along. What's different with me to other children is that I had dreamed that I was a hero in the past and gained some maturity over it.'
Philip felt that something stirred inside his mind as though a rope had snapped. Instantly, he dropped to the floor while touching his aching head.
Suddenly, a bell chimed inside his head, indicating a system's new notification.
Even without looking, he knew what it was and was now sure that he could finally open the illusionary door.
Without hesitation, he entered into his astral form and walked to the nearest bare wall. He extended his arm and willed all the pinkish hues in his body to rush over the wall.
When the door materialized, it bore the familiar symbols of snowflakes and dried leaves. However, the starlight peeping behind was replaced with dark and weeping clouds.
Philip turned the handle and finally entered it. When he passed through the door, he was welcomed by a field crammed with pampas grasses swaying with the strong wind.
The area was dark and threatening. It was as though something dangerous was hiding under the grasses.
As Philip walked inside his space of consciousness, large droplets of water poured over his face. And the more he walked, the more he got wet.
However, he didn't mind them as all of his thoughts were on walking.
Along with the muddy ground and the strong wind hitting his face, Philip's gaze was similarly dark and empty.
However, unlike his face, his feat was active and brimming with strength. Strangely, they were attracted to whatever was on the edge of his space of consciousness.
The longer he walked, the more purple crystals he found floating above the grass field. If it weren't for their light illuminating the field, Philip would have found himself walking in pitch-black surroundings, not knowing where to go and where he was.
Soon, his eyes finally caught a gigantic diamond-shaped rock formation floating on the far end. Separating Philip and the rock in between was a seemingly endless gap.
Upon reaching the end of the cliff, Philip dazedly looked at the floating island that appeared to be diffused by void and surrounded by falling black snowflakes.
Philip sensed a strong connection within it. He felt desolation, loneliness, surrender, hopelessness, and a bit of anger. It was as if all his negative emotions were locked on that island.
Although the island was gigantic, Philip noticed that it had nothing aside from a small woven basket in the center. Moreover, this basket seemed to be the source of the void and chaotic emotions around.
The more Philip examined the island, the more he felt he wanted to surrender. He was starting to believe that everything he did was without a purpose - that his life was nothing but insignificant and without use.
Philip's gaze dimmed even more and unconsciously extended his arm to the nearest floating purple crystal.
When he caught the crystal, it suddenly transformed into an old pistol, and immediately pointed the barrel to his head.
But when he was about to pull the trigger, his peripheral view noticed a floating island 100 times smaller than the gigantic island.
It was very small and almost unnoticeable. But despite this, Philip could not help but be enamored by it.
The small island cast a golden radiance around it. In the center, A tree larger and taller than the island firmly stood with dry leaves falling to the ground.
Philip dropped the gun on the floor and hurriedly walked to the bridge that connected the cliff to the floating island.
And when he touched the handrail, the bridge glowed, and dried golden leaves danced in the air with him at the center.
After seemingly a long walk, Philip's left foot finally touched the edge of the island. But when he was about to move his right foot, he was stopped by a transparent semi-circular wall and could only observe the island on the bridge.
In addition to the tall tree, there were also a few animals and insects playing around. On the corner, a cabin house with flowers surrounding it was seen.
Seeing this, Philip felt happiness, normality, haven, peace, and salvation.
Philip's gaze lightened, and the rain finally stopped. The gloomy clouds also began to disperse, showing a sun in the sky, seemingly smiling at him. He also smiled and let the sunlight touch his skin as he continued observing the small island.
He noticed that it influenced him and gave him the tenacity to live and move forward.
It was also at this time he realized things.
How did he fool the mercenaries, Steve, and Loen in the past? It was because this special small island he unlocked could influence other people.
The more he believes something is the truth, the more he influences others to move in the direction he wants to.
From the bear trap, instead of the mercenaries dividing into two teams, all of them searched above the trees to look for him, totally inconsistent with those who had a lot of experience in the area.
As for them believing in him as if he were the messenger of god, this was also due to his core memory's influence. From the start, they should have not believed in him as he was not only dirty but also frightened. Additionally, why would a messenger of God hide in the forest and be injured? Aren't all those close to God powerful?
As for Steve, he should have never hired Raven as his strength was very abnormal to appear in a small town. Moreover, the reason he whispered the magic word while he was with Raven was most likely also due to being influenced by Philip's thoughts and goals.
Philip laughed. He finally found out the inconsistency. He was indeed right, he was only a blank state that acted as if he was all along an experienced person.
Philip left the island and slowly walked to the grassy field, he faced the blue sky above and said under his breath,
"I walk in the dreams I believe to be the truths."
-End (Dreamwalker)
