Chapter 160: McTeeth on the Job
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Chapter 160: McTeeth on the Job
As the sun rose over Sedgewick, a lone figure appeared in the village square. Everyone was used to McTeeth resurrecting each morning by now, but it was still fun to watch. He always made a production of stretching and yawning as if he was getting out of bed and then dove into the village fountain for his morning bath. Stepping from the fountain he somehow pulled a clean, dry towel from his sleeve and dried himself off.
Following this he took off his pack, and pulled out thread and needle, and clothe patches. Someone was always there to place a stool for him to sit down, and a small table to hold his sewing kit. After carefully laying out his tools the process of patching his torn and cut clothing began. This is where the show really started for the half dozen rogues who showed up each day to watch and listen.
McTeeth would pull off a sock, or his tunic, even his pants, and then show his audience a large hole in his attire. He would then explain in extreme and gruesome detail the trap that had made the hole in both his clothing and in himself, killing him. To encourage his stories, the other rogues brought him tea and food from the tavern, setting up his breakfast on a small side table. McTeeth would repair his worn vestments and regale his fellow rogues with tales of pit traps, pendulums, exploding mice, and other deadly traps. He always had an enthusiastic audience. He liked to end things with a piece of pie and a short question and answer session.
Q:"Yo, Teeth! First of all, aces to you on finally getting past the exploding mice, but why not give us a few hints on how you did it?"
A:"I don't want to steal that from you guys. When you finally get lucky enough to get an invite to the castle, I want you to score all the sweet experience I'm collecting."
Q:"How long until they open that castle up? It sounds awesome. Dungeons never have enough traps to get skill increases from."
A:"I'm working with the Baron on that. Don't worry guys, it will be soon. And then three lucky thieves will get a chance at all the riches and experience I'm getting."
Q:"Why the hell do you get a cut of it all the treasure and experience we earn? This sounds like some daman Ponzi scheme!"
A:"Screw you Larry, if you don't like it, stay the hell out. I think a third of your treasure and experience is cheap compared to what I'm going through! No hints, not warnings, just lots and lots of painful death. I think my mentorship program is quite fair. Plus, you'll be able to charge the same when it's your turn to bring people in. We can all get rich. Except for Larry. Sod off, Larry, you're out of the mentorship program."Plunge into the depths of Nøv€lß¡n, where information dwells.
After Larry was banned from the morning sessions, no one else complained.
Today McTeeth had a tale about a combination trap of a large rolling rock, and a greased floor. His clothes were ok, but the buckles were completely flattened and had to be bent into shape. Then he finished his tea and prepared to leave.
"Yep. Let’s make it easy to unload. I've been hitting bigger and bigger treasures lately and I can smell a big one somewhere. I've got to be more careful though, it's getting harder and harder to get a nice score each day, even with the first three deaths just putting me at the start of the castle. Oh, and I need you to bring back the locks from now on. Fix them, then break half of them and bring them back. The Baroness figured out they have value."
"No problem. I can only get experience once off of them. Don’t let the castle wear you down now. I've got faith in you, just keep at it. We'll come out of this rich and with a hell of a skillset to head into Tier 3." He turned and left, moving carefully through the city. McTeeth turned and entered the castle.
"Back Finally! I should never have let you talk me into taking a break every fourth death. I'm thinking of changing that. I think ten deaths is a better choice, maybe twenty. We're behind schedule. Where are these three new souls to torture?"
McTeeth sat down in a comfortable armchair and brought out some wine and cheese from Billy's table. He liked a nice nap after the walk up from town. "Nearly ready. I have them eager to get in here. They've agreed to my mentorship program. You need to take out a third of all their experience and earned gold, and give it to me. Then when they find three thieves, they get the same deal."
"And you get a third of what they take from the next tier down! So Evil! I like it so much I'll allow it. But only so long as you're ahead of them. If one of them get to the next level before you do, they take over."
McTeeth wasn't worried. "Agreed, but not a chance of it happening. Not with all the blood I've spilled helping you make this place into a better deathtrap. I'll be looting the third level before they hit level two. You say it's really nasty up there?"
"Oh, truly horrible. I even have my doubts you can increase the deadliness, even after all the nice improvements I've seen to the first level. How is the work your little friend is doing for us?"
"Oh, I'm working him to death. Did you see the man? He's so scared of me he looks like a scarecrow. He'll have the improved locks up here tomorrow, and he can start producing Dark Steel blades for the pendulums next week."
"Outstanding. That will increase the chance of permanent limb loss by 10%. Granted, I'm limited to making 'permanent' only a week, but it's the thought that counts. Now quit slacking. I'm getting anxious."
McTeeth finished the bottle of wine. "Yeah, yeah. Don't get your boxers in a twist. I'm on it. Two more rooms and that meat grinder at the end of the hall and then I'm done with this level.”
"Make it so, number one, make it so."
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Chapter 160: McTeeth on the Job
As the sun rose over Sedgewick, a lone figure appeared in the village square. Everyone was used to McTeeth resurrecting each morning by now, but it was still fun to watch. He always made a production of stretching and yawning as if he was getting out of bed and then dove into the village fountain for his morning bath. Stepping from the fountain he somehow pulled a clean, dry towel from his sleeve and dried himself off.
Following this he took off his pack, and pulled out thread and needle, and clothe patches. Someone was always there to place a stool for him to sit down, and a small table to hold his sewing kit. After carefully laying out his tools the process of patching his torn and cut clothing began. This is where the show really started for the half dozen rogues who showed up each day to watch and listen.
McTeeth would pull off a sock, or his tunic, even his pants, and then show his audience a large hole in his attire. He would then explain in extreme and gruesome detail the trap that had made the hole in both his clothing and in himself, killing him. To encourage his stories, the other rogues brought him tea and food from the tavern, setting up his breakfast on a small side table. McTeeth would repair his worn vestments and regale his fellow rogues with tales of pit traps, pendulums, exploding mice, and other deadly traps. He always had an enthusiastic audience. He liked to end things with a piece of pie and a short question and answer session.
Q:"Yo, Teeth! First of all, aces to you on finally getting past the exploding mice, but why not give us a few hints on how you did it?"
A:"I don't want to steal that from you guys. When you finally get lucky enough to get an invite to the castle, I want you to score all the sweet experience I'm collecting."
Q:"How long until they open that castle up? It sounds awesome. Dungeons never have enough traps to get skill increases from."
A:"I'm working with the Baron on that. Don't worry guys, it will be soon. And then three lucky thieves will get a chance at all the riches and experience I'm getting."
Q:"Why the hell do you get a cut of it all the treasure and experience we earn? This sounds like some daman Ponzi scheme!"
A:"Screw you Larry, if you don't like it, stay the hell out. I think a third of your treasure and experience is cheap compared to what I'm going through! No hints, not warnings, just lots and lots of painful death. I think my mentorship program is quite fair. Plus, you'll be able to charge the same when it's your turn to bring people in. We can all get rich. Except for Larry. Sod off, Larry, you're out of the mentorship program."Plunge into the depths of Nøv€lß¡n, where information dwells.
After Larry was banned from the morning sessions, no one else complained.
Today McTeeth had a tale about a combination trap of a large rolling rock, and a greased floor. His clothes were ok, but the buckles were completely flattened and had to be bent into shape. Then he finished his tea and prepared to leave.
"Yep. Let’s make it easy to unload. I've been hitting bigger and bigger treasures lately and I can smell a big one somewhere. I've got to be more careful though, it's getting harder and harder to get a nice score each day, even with the first three deaths just putting me at the start of the castle. Oh, and I need you to bring back the locks from now on. Fix them, then break half of them and bring them back. The Baroness figured out they have value."
"No problem. I can only get experience once off of them. Don’t let the castle wear you down now. I've got faith in you, just keep at it. We'll come out of this rich and with a hell of a skillset to head into Tier 3." He turned and left, moving carefully through the city. McTeeth turned and entered the castle.
"Back Finally! I should never have let you talk me into taking a break every fourth death. I'm thinking of changing that. I think ten deaths is a better choice, maybe twenty. We're behind schedule. Where are these three new souls to torture?"
McTeeth sat down in a comfortable armchair and brought out some wine and cheese from Billy's table. He liked a nice nap after the walk up from town. "Nearly ready. I have them eager to get in here. They've agreed to my mentorship program. You need to take out a third of all their experience and earned gold, and give it to me. Then when they find three thieves, they get the same deal."
"And you get a third of what they take from the next tier down! So Evil! I like it so much I'll allow it. But only so long as you're ahead of them. If one of them get to the next level before you do, they take over."
McTeeth wasn't worried. "Agreed, but not a chance of it happening. Not with all the blood I've spilled helping you make this place into a better deathtrap. I'll be looting the third level before they hit level two. You say it's really nasty up there?"
"Oh, truly horrible. I even have my doubts you can increase the deadliness, even after all the nice improvements I've seen to the first level. How is the work your little friend is doing for us?"
"Oh, I'm working him to death. Did you see the man? He's so scared of me he looks like a scarecrow. He'll have the improved locks up here tomorrow, and he can start producing Dark Steel blades for the pendulums next week."
"Outstanding. That will increase the chance of permanent limb loss by 10%. Granted, I'm limited to making 'permanent' only a week, but it's the thought that counts. Now quit slacking. I'm getting anxious."
McTeeth finished the bottle of wine. "Yeah, yeah. Don't get your boxers in a twist. I'm on it. Two more rooms and that meat grinder at the end of the hall and then I'm done with this level.”
"Make it so, number one, make it so."
Chapter 160: McTeeth on the JobAs the sun rose over Sedgewick, a lone figure appeared in the village square. Everyone was used to McTeeth resurrecting each morning by now, but it was still fun to watch. He always made a production of stretching and yawning as if he was getting out of bed and then dove into the village fountain for his morning bath. Stepping from the fountain he somehow pulled a clean, dry towel from his sleeve and dried himself off. Following this he took off his pack, and pulled out thread and needle, and clothe patches. Someone was always there to place a stool for him to sit down, and a small table to hold his sewing kit. After carefully laying out his tools the process of patching his torn and cut clothing began. This is where the show really started for the half dozen rogues who showed up each day to watch and listen.McTeeth would pull off a sock, or his tunic, even his pants, and then show his audience a large hole in his attire. He would then explain in extreme and gruesome detail the trap that had made the hole in both his clothing and in himself, killing him. To encourage his stories, the other rogues brought him tea and food from the tavern, setting up his breakfast on a small side table. McTeeth would repair his worn vestments and regale his fellow rogues with tales of pit traps, pendulums, exploding mice, and other deadly traps. He always had an enthusiastic audience. He liked to end things with a piece of pie and a short question and answer session.Q:"Yo, Teeth! First of all, aces to you on finally getting past the exploding mice, but why not give us a few hints on how you did it?"A:"I don't want to steal that from you guys. When you finally get lucky enough to get an invite to the castle, I want you to score all the sweet experience I'm collecting."Q:"How long until they open that castle up? It sounds awesome. Dungeons never have enough traps to get skill increases from."A:"I'm working with the Baron on that. Don't worry guys, it will be soon. And then three lucky thieves will get a chance at all the riches and experience I'm getting."Q:"Why the hell do you get a cut of it all the treasure and experience we earn? This sounds like some daman Ponzi scheme!"A:"Screw you Larry, if you don't like it, stay the hell out. I think a third of your treasure and experience is cheap compared to what I'm going through! No hints, not warnings, just lots and lots of painful death. I think my mentorship program is quite fair. Plus, you'll be able to charge the same when it's your turn to bring people in. We can all get rich. Except for Larry. Sod off, Larry, you're out of the mentorship program."Plunge into the depths of Nvln, where information dwells.After Larry was banned from the morning sessions, no one else complained.Today McTeeth had a tale about a combination trap of a large rolling rock, and a greased floor. His clothes were ok, but the buckles were completely flattened and had to be bent into shape. Then he finished his tea and prepared to leave. "Yep. Let's make it easy to unload. I've been hitting bigger and bigger treasures lately and I can smell a big one somewhere. I've got to be more careful though, it's getting harder and harder to get a nice score each day, even with the first three deaths just putting me at the start of the castle. Oh, and I need you to bring back the locks from now on. Fix them, then break half of them and bring them back. The Baroness figured out they have value.""No problem. I can only get experience once off of them. Don't let the castle wear you down now. I've got faith in you, just keep at it. We'll come out of this rich and with a hell of a skillset to head into Tier 3." He turned and left, moving carefully through the city. McTeeth turned and entered the castle."Back Finally! I should never have let you talk me into taking a break every fourth death. I'm thinking of changing that. I think ten deaths is a better choice, maybe twenty. We're behind schedule. Where are these three new souls to torture?"McTeeth sat down in a comfortable armchair and brought out some wine and cheese from Billy's table. He liked a nice nap after the walk up from town. "Nearly ready. I have them eager to get in here. They've agreed to my mentorship program. You need to take out a third of all their experience and earned gold, and give it to me. Then when they find three thieves, they get the same deal.""And you get a third of what they take from the next tier down! So Evil! I like it so much I'll allow it. But only so long as you're ahead of them. If one of them get to the next level before you do, they take over."McTeeth wasn't worried. "Agreed, but not a chance of it happening. Not with all the blood I've spilled helping you make this place into a better deathtrap. I'll be looting the third level before they hit level two. You say it's really nasty up there?""Oh, truly horrible. I even have my doubts you can increase the deadliness, even after all the nice improvements I've seen to the first level. How is the work your little friend is doing for us?""Oh, I'm working him to death. Did you see the man? He's so scared of me he looks like a scarecrow. He'll have the improved locks up here tomorrow, and he can start producing Dark Steel blades for the pendulums next week.""Outstanding. That will increase the chance of permanent limb loss by 10%. Granted, I'm limited to making 'permanent' only a week, but it's the thought that counts. Now quit slacking. I'm getting anxious."McTeeth finished the bottle of wine. "Yeah, yeah. Don't get your boxers in a twist. I'm on it. Two more rooms and that meat grinder at the end of the hall and then I'm done with this level."Make it so, number one, make it so."
