Yuki opened his eyes. The blinds on the windows on the side of the room let the bright sunlight filter through. He looked forward from his seat in the corner of the room and saw the unblemished whiteboard that hung on the front most wall. He heard the sound of pencils scratching on paper. Looking down at his desk, he found a test on it. A test that was already completed.
‘School.’
He was back in elementary school, age seven. His eyes went about the room as they locked onto the familiar faces around him. Most of the faces were downturned, staring at the test before them. But a few looked back at him and made faces, sticking their tongues out and deforming their features. Yuki turned away from them and stared down.
‘School.’
A wave of sadness washed over him as memories floated up from his mind. All of the years he had spent in school came crashing back down on him. The anxiety and paranoia came back. It felt as if he was seven once more.
‘I need to leave,’ he thought, licking his lip. ‘I can’t deal with this right now.’
He stood up and the heads over everyone in the room turned toward him. His mind froze, his legs locking as he felt the attention that fell on him. He swallowed and rushed outside. The teacher called out to him, his voice accusing. Yuki covered his ears as he ran out, his small feet pounding against the concrete floor of the hall.
He slammed opened the doors of the school and staggered out. The streets were oddly quiet, not a car or person in sight. The sky was clear and the breeze lazily made its way along the street. Yuki stumbled across the sidewalk, his head a jumble and his thoughts a mess.
When he looked up, he found himself in a small park. He blinked as his feet moved on their own. He sat down on a swing, the metal chains holding it creaking. Yuki swallowed as more memories made themselves known. Running out of school the moment the bell rang. Hiding from the others that tried to find him. Then going to the park where he swung by himself, sometimes for a few minutes, other times hours.
‘Why?’ Yuki thought, his breathing heavy. ‘Why am I here?’
His fingers began to drum on the metal chain of the swing as his eyes flickered about.
‘Calm down. It’s just a dream, Yuki. Just a dream. You’re not a kid anymore.’
He closed his eyes and controlled his breathing until it began to subside. With a sigh, he felt his body loosen and his mind relax. Then another memory rose up from the depths. But this one felt different.
A dark silhouette. A young girl whose outline felt familiar. Staring at her, Yuki felt his chest fill with something foreign. His heart pounded. His chest tightened. But his mind brightened.
And then a voice. A voice called out from the silhouette. A bright, clear voice that echoed in his mind.
“You should go home, Yuki. It’s getting late.”
His eyes opened and stared at the girl standing in front of him, a smile on her face. Her soft tan skin glowed softly in the light of the sun that was suddenly setting. The black hair that seemed all so familiar was outlined by the dim light of the sun, the light a halo around her head. A shadow covered her face but it couldn’t hide the bright green eyes that shone through it.
“Sam.” Yuki’s lip trembled. “Sam?”
“It’s late, Yuki,” she said. Whether she heard him, he couldn’t tell.
“Samantha,” Yuki repeated. “Can you...hear me?”
“We should get going. A girl as pretty as you shouldn’t stay out too late,” she grinned.
‘I’m not a girl,’ he mouthed, his face falling as more memories arose.
“You know I don’t care,” she giggled. “Either way, you’re pretty. I’m jealous.”
‘Why would you be jealous of a guy,’ Yuki repeated.
“Because pretty is pretty. Now let’s go!” she exclaimed.
She spun on her heel and turned around. Yuki leapt out of the swing, the chains rattling.
“Sam,” he repeated. “It’s me.”
“Hurry up, Yuki,” she said.
“Sam. Turn around. Please.”
“I’ll leave you behind if you don’t catch up~!” she laughed as she started running ahead.
“Sam!” Yuki shouted. He started to run after her. “Don’t leave me again!”
But no matter how hard he ran, she always stayed out of reach, smiling and laughing as she encouraged him to catch up. He stopped, staring at her back as she grew further and further away, the setting sun enveloping her in its golden embrace.
“Sam,” he whispered.
With a thud, he fell on his knees. He stared at the horizon. His chest constricted as Samantha disappeared once again. Just like how she did before.
“Why did you leave?” he said. “Why couldn’t you stay?”
But he knew why she left. Because life was like that. It gave and it took. Only this time, it took more than it gave. She had no choice. She had no say.
“I know you didn’t want to leave.”
He knelt there, staring as his heart cried but his expression unchanging.
“Sam,” he breathed.
“Do you know what’s wrong?” Akira asked.
Zoe was peering closely at Yuki, her glowing palm on his forehead. She had a slight frown on her face as she watched.
“I don’t know the details but his emotions are a mess right now,” she said. “It’s not a panic attack.”
“Yeah, it’s something else,” Erica said. “I could feel her emotions. They were much stronger than anything I’ve felt in a while. Especially from her.”
‘I’ve never seen this before,’ she thought.
“If it’s not a panic attack, then what is it?” Akira said, frowning.
“He did just go through a near death experience,” Zoe said. “Hmm. Did anything else happen to him? Anything unusual for him?”
“He did have a recent burst of anger,” Akira brought up. “A very strong one. I’ve never felt something so strong from him before.”
Erica shuddered as she remembered the flames of anger that had radiated out from the ruins of the LIA base.
“He normally keeps his feelings bottled up, correct?”
“Yes.”
“But the container broke. Or it would seem, shattered.”
“That’s possible,” Akira nodded.
“Then I think I might know what happened,” Zoe said. “His emotions are just extremely unstable right now. Any strong ones will get amplified due to his current state. His mind is trying to bottle them back in, but it’s hard putting back pieces.”
“So her stress was the most prominent emotion she felt when she went out to the city and that was the emotion that was focused on by her mind,” Erica concluded.
“Something like that. With some rest and a stable environment, Yuki should be fine within a day or so. His mind just needs some quiet for it to go back to its original state.”
Erica nodded.
“Isn’t it bad to bottle emotions up?” Akira asked.
“Yes, but he’s been doing that for years, I presume. It’s become his mind’s natural state,” Zoe explained. “Any large changes to that will cause a number of problems, his current state one of them. If you want him to not bottle up emotions, then he’s going to have to start small and release it little by little.”
“She can’t do that,” Erica said, shaking her head. “I’ve felt what her mind is like. She isn’t doing it on purpose. It’s almost instinctual.”
“Then just let her rest. That’s the best we can do for her. Magic to cure the mind only works for diseases. Not psychology.”
“I understand,” Akira said.
“Good job putting him to rest,” Zoe nodded. “Any longer may have hurt him more.”
“It’s the least I can do,” Erica replied.
“My job is done here.” Zoe straightened and gave Akira a small smile. “Don’t worry so much. He should be fine with a few good night’s rest. I recommend that he doesn’t go to the Academy for the next day or so. He needs it as calm as possible.”
“I understand.”
“And don’t be afraid to call me for something like this. I got mad about the last call because that was entirely Yuki’s fault for pushing himself. This is something that no one could predict. So if anything ever happens again, just tell me and I’ll come right away. He is my guild leader.”
“Thank you, Zoe,” Erica said.
“It’s my job. I’ll be taking my leave now,” she said.
Erica followed her as she went out to the back of the apartment. Placing her hand on a tree that stood tall, a solitary figure. Zoe hesitated for a bit before turning her head toward Erica.
“I know Akira is the one that knows Yuki best,” she started. “And she knows when something is wrong. But you’re the only here besides me that can monitor his emotional state.”
“I know,” Erica sighed. “Just because I can, though, doesn’t mean I’m able to. I’m not a psychologist or anything. I’m just a succubus.”
“You’ll still be able to see when his emotions begin to overflow,” Zoe pointed out. “Akira can’t do that. She may know when something is wrong and can get a feel for what’s wrong, but she won’t be able to diagnose him. You can.”
“Then what do you want me to do?”
“When you see that his emotional state is starting to teeter, you need to calm him down. Put him to sleep, move him away, anything. We can’t let his feelings run rampant. Hopefully, the unbalances will begin to fade away and you won’t have to do that anymore, but until then.”
“I’ll try. I can’t promise anything. I’ve never done something like this.”
“Something like this?”
“Taking care of someone.”
“Because you can’t or because you’ve never found someone you wanted to care for?”
“I don’t know,” Erica said, staring at the ground. “I’ve never been around someone long enough to be able to tell.”
“Just try your best,” Zoe smiled. “Akira can help if you ask. But the monitoring will mainly be done by you.”
“I understand.”
“Good. See you later.”
Zoe shimmered and gave one last smile before disappearing. Erica let out a soft sigh.
“How do I care for someone?” she asked. The air didn’t reply.
Yuki opened his eyes. The blinds on the windows on the side of the room let the bright sunlight filter through. He looked forward from his seat in the corner of the room and saw the unblemished whiteboard that hung on the front most wall. He heard the sound of pencils scratching on paper. Looking down at his desk, he found a test on it. A test that was already completed.
‘School.’
He was back in elementary school, age seven. His eyes went about the room as they locked onto the familiar faces around him. Most of the faces were downturned, staring at the test before them. But a few looked back at him and made faces, sticking their tongues out and deforming their features. Yuki turned away from them and stared down.
‘School.’
A wave of sadness washed over him as memories floated up from his mind. All of the years he had spent in school came crashing back down on him. The anxiety and paranoia came back. It felt as if he was seven once more.
‘I need to leave,’ he thought, licking his lip. ‘I can’t deal with this right now.’
He stood up and the heads over everyone in the room turned toward him. His mind froze, his legs locking as he felt the attention that fell on him. He swallowed and rushed outside. The teacher called out to him, his voice accusing. Yuki covered his ears as he ran out, his small feet pounding against the concrete floor of the hall.
He slammed opened the doors of the school and staggered out. The streets were oddly quiet, not a car or person in sight. The sky was clear and the breeze lazily made its way along the street. Yuki stumbled across the sidewalk, his head a jumble and his thoughts a mess.
When he looked up, he found himself in a small park. He blinked as his feet moved on their own. He sat down on a swing, the metal chains holding it creaking. Yuki swallowed as more memories made themselves known. Running out of school the moment the bell rang. Hiding from the others that tried to find him. Then going to the park where he swung by himself, sometimes for a few minutes, other times hours.
‘Why?’ Yuki thought, his breathing heavy. ‘Why am I here?’
His fingers began to drum on the metal chain of the swing as his eyes flickered about.
‘Calm down. It’s just a dream, Yuki. Just a dream. You’re not a kid anymore.’
He closed his eyes and controlled his breathing until it began to subside. With a sigh, he felt his body loosen and his mind relax. Then another memory rose up from the depths. But this one felt different.
A dark silhouette. A young girl whose outline felt familiar. Staring at her, Yuki felt his chest fill with something foreign. His heart pounded. His chest tightened. But his mind brightened.
And then a voice. A voice called out from the silhouette. A bright, clear voice that echoed in his mind.
“You should go home, Yuki. It’s getting late.”
His eyes opened and stared at the girl standing in front of him, a smile on her face. Her soft tan skin glowed softly in the light of the sun that was suddenly setting. The black hair that seemed all so familiar was outlined by the dim light of the sun, the light a halo around her head. A shadow covered her face but it couldn’t hide the bright green eyes that shone through it.
“Sam.” Yuki’s lip trembled. “Sam?”
“It’s late, Yuki,” she said. Whether she heard him, he couldn’t tell.
“Samantha,” Yuki repeated. “Can you...hear me?”
“We should get going. A girl as pretty as you shouldn’t stay out too late,” she grinned.
‘I’m not a girl,’ he mouthed, his face falling as more memories arose.
“You know I don’t care,” she giggled. “Either way, you’re pretty. I’m jealous.”
‘Why would you be jealous of a guy,’ Yuki repeated.
“Because pretty is pretty. Now let’s go!” she exclaimed.
She spun on her heel and turned around. Yuki leapt out of the swing, the chains rattling.
“Sam,” he repeated. “It’s me.”
“Hurry up, Yuki,” she said.
“Sam. Turn around. Please.”
“I’ll leave you behind if you don’t catch up~!” she laughed as she started running ahead.
“Sam!” Yuki shouted. He started to run after her. “Don’t leave me again!”
But no matter how hard he ran, she always stayed out of reach, smiling and laughing as she encouraged him to catch up. He stopped, staring at her back as she grew further and further away, the setting sun enveloping her in its golden embrace.
“Sam,” he whispered.
With a thud, he fell on his knees. He stared at the horizon. His chest constricted as Samantha disappeared once again. Just like how she did before.
“Why did you leave?” he said. “Why couldn’t you stay?”
But he knew why she left. Because life was like that. It gave and it took. Only this time, it took more than it gave. She had no choice. She had no say.
“I know you didn’t want to leave.”
He knelt there, staring as his heart cried but his expression unchanging.
“Sam,” he breathed.
“Do you know what’s wrong?” Akira asked.
Zoe was peering closely at Yuki, her glowing palm on his forehead. She had a slight frown on her face as she watched.
“I don’t know the details but his emotions are a mess right now,” she said. “It’s not a panic attack.”
“Yeah, it’s something else,” Erica said. “I could feel her emotions. They were much stronger than anything I’ve felt in a while. Especially from her.”
‘I’ve never seen this before,’ she thought.
“If it’s not a panic attack, then what is it?” Akira said, frowning.
“He did just go through a near death experience,” Zoe said. “Hmm. Did anything else happen to him? Anything unusual for him?”
“He did have a recent burst of anger,” Akira brought up. “A very strong one. I’ve never felt something so strong from him before.”
Erica shuddered as she remembered the flames of anger that had radiated out from the ruins of the LIA base.
“He normally keeps his feelings bottled up, correct?”
“Yes.”
“But the container broke. Or it would seem, shattered.”
“That’s possible,” Akira nodded.
“Then I think I might know what happened,” Zoe said. “His emotions are just extremely unstable right now. Any strong ones will get amplified due to his current state. His mind is trying to bottle them back in, but it’s hard putting back pieces.”
“So her stress was the most prominent emotion she felt when she went out to the city and that was the emotion that was focused on by her mind,” Erica concluded.
“Something like that. With some rest and a stable environment, Yuki should be fine within a day or so. His mind just needs some quiet for it to go back to its original state.”
Erica nodded.
“Isn’t it bad to bottle emotions up?” Akira asked.
“Yes, but he’s been doing that for years, I presume. It’s become his mind’s natural state,” Zoe explained. “Any large changes to that will cause a number of problems, his current state one of them. If you want him to not bottle up emotions, then he’s going to have to start small and release it little by little.”
“She can’t do that,” Erica said, shaking her head. “I’ve felt what her mind is like. She isn’t doing it on purpose. It’s almost instinctual.”
“Then just let her rest. That’s the best we can do for her. Magic to cure the mind only works for diseases. Not psychology.”
“I understand,” Akira said.
“Good job putting him to rest,” Zoe nodded. “Any longer may have hurt him more.”
“It’s the least I can do,” Erica replied.
“My job is done here.” Zoe straightened and gave Akira a small smile. “Don’t worry so much. He should be fine with a few good night’s rest. I recommend that he doesn’t go to the Academy for the next day or so. He needs it as calm as possible.”
“I understand.”
“And don’t be afraid to call me for something like this. I got mad about the last call because that was entirely Yuki’s fault for pushing himself. This is something that no one could predict. So if anything ever happens again, just tell me and I’ll come right away. He is my guild leader.”
“Thank you, Zoe,” Erica said.
“It’s my job. I’ll be taking my leave now,” she said.
Erica followed her as she went out to the back of the apartment. Placing her hand on a tree that stood tall, a solitary figure. Zoe hesitated for a bit before turning her head toward Erica.
“I know Akira is the one that knows Yuki best,” she started. “And she knows when something is wrong. But you’re the only here besides me that can monitor his emotional state.”
“I know,” Erica sighed. “Just because I can, though, doesn’t mean I’m able to. I’m not a psychologist or anything. I’m just a succubus.”
“You’ll still be able to see when his emotions begin to overflow,” Zoe pointed out. “Akira can’t do that. She may know when something is wrong and can get a feel for what’s wrong, but she won’t be able to diagnose him. You can.”
“Then what do you want me to do?”
“When you see that his emotional state is starting to teeter, you need to calm him down. Put him to sleep, move him away, anything. We can’t let his feelings run rampant. Hopefully, the unbalances will begin to fade away and you won’t have to do that anymore, but until then.”
“I’ll try. I can’t promise anything. I’ve never done something like this.”
“Something like this?”
“Taking care of someone.”
“Because you can’t or because you’ve never found someone you wanted to care for?”
“I don’t know,” Erica said, staring at the ground. “I’ve never been around someone long enough to be able to tell.”
“Just try your best,” Zoe smiled. “Akira can help if you ask. But the monitoring will mainly be done by you.”
“I understand.”
“Good. See you later.”
Zoe shimmered and gave one last smile before disappearing. Erica let out a soft sigh.
“How do I care for someone?” she asked. The air didn’t reply.
