“Come on, Ave… don’t be a wimp and follow me.”
Tired of waiting for him to make the first step, I grab his hand and pull. He resists, grabbing what remains of the smashed door with everything he has.
“B-but… can’t we go back? There’s no need to go inside, you know?” His eyes swim around, looking for an excuse, any excuse, to avoid this place. “We’ve already seen everything! I swear!”
I ignore him and continue pulling.
“Stop acting like this. It’s your job to guide me, so do it properly.”
“B-but, I…” He stutters. “I-I know, we can just take a peek and go back! Yes, let’s do this! Ahaha… you don’t need me, I’ll wait for you here.”
“Stop struggling already.”
Shit, I can’t pull him away from the door’s remains…
How can he resist me? I have the higher stats, it should be easy to do it! What’s going on? Does he have a skill that allows him to stick to walls or something!?
Seeing that I don’t want to change my mind, and sooner or later, I’ll manage to pry him away from the door, he decides to switch to another tactic.
In a final attempt to convince me, he grabs my hands and stares at my eyes, pleadingly.
“Please…?”
He makes the sweetest of the smiles. Oww, that’s playing dirty!
But work is work. Contrary to his expectations, I take this chance to drag him away. He made it a lot easier by releasing the door on its own.
“Let’s go,” I say, grabbing his hands too, so he can’t escape.
“Aaaah! No, not this again!” He struggles the best he can, but there’s nothing to grab anymore. This green-brown sticky substance makes it hard to grab the walls, and it isn’t possible to grab the stairs. “T-this is it! Once we finish this, we’re done! I’ll break up with you!”
I know he doesn’t mean it, so I ignore him and continue dragging him, descending the stairs. The light grows dimmer as we go, to the point that it’s hard to see anything at all.
It seems like, finally, I’m going to discover what he’s so afraid of. The curiosity was killing me! I was hoping to see it sooner…
Not that I was disappointed about the rest of the dungeon, though.
It was fun dealing with the turtle’s crossfire and the constant ambushes in the tunnels, I always appreciate a challenge.
The mushrooms which everyone hates weren’t dangerous to us because we came prepared with resistance skills. Corp, or Ave as he wants to be called now, is an elf with the Nature Attuned skill, and I created a new champion just for this. It was a little bit boring, so I might want to try it without the resistance skills at a later date, but we couldn’t risk dying and wasting time.
That giant worm that tried to eat me was a big surprise. Corp’s face when it happened was hilarious. He couldn’t believe it when I used Blink to escape. He’s still too green…
The rest was fine too. It was clear to me why the players both fear and enjoy this dungeon and why they keep coming back.
This is exactly what we’re looking for, a. The Mad Rat’s Lab will be a great option for our Mystical & Dangerous Monsters & Dungeons. It’s something different. Something unique but well-executed. But…
…it’s too early.
The low level of the player shows up everywhere. There are no real threats and the dungeon is too short. It’ll take time for it to reach its true potential, we’ll have to come at a later date again and see if it’s good enough by then.
“Oh, yes… thinking about it… weren’t people talking about Anthemia and this dungeon, before we came here…?” I heard it from our coworkers. “About meeting her in person if we’re the first to beat this dungeon, right?”
I ask Corp, who’s still trying to get free.
“Aaah, no. Please, anything but this!”
No use asking him, he’s not listening.
“If we’re lucky, we might have a chance to meet her. It’ll be a nice business opportunity… but our job comes first.” I shrug.
As soon as we reach the end of the stairs, Corp calms down and stops shouting. He moves behind me and grabs my shoulders, turning his head around in fear, his eyes wide open.
*Blip!*
“Aah!” Corp jumps when he hears a noise coming from the passage in front of us. He hides behind me, shaking. “I-it might b-b-be something else… y-yes. Something, e-else…”
Is this some kind of trap? Is this what he was so scared of?
“Finally!” I rub my hands together. “The mystery will be solved!”
Then, from the same direction as the noise, voices come to us.
“Bahahaha! I ate all your family, and you’ll be next!”
“Let’s beeeeeeee friends! Friends foreveeeeeer!”
What the hell’s going on? I didn’t have time to inspect the area, is trouble already on our way?
“No, no, no, no… Anything but this…”
My whole body starts shaking. It’s Corp, who’s trembling so much that it affects me too.
“Calm down,” I say, “I’m sure there’s nothing to be afraid.”
“...no, no, no… not this… not this…!”
Ok, I was curious before, but now I’m about to explode. What’s going on!? I want to know!
Soon after, I see movement. Monsters, they’re coming in our direction. It’s hard to see because of the lack of light, but they don’t seem to be taller than a meter.
“Don’t worry, Ave. I’ll protect you!” I stand ready for combat. A bunch of human-headed sheep are coming our way, spouting random phrases. “What the heck…!?”
I freeze. It’s the first time I've seen something like this, what’s going on?
Luckily for us, they don’t attack us. They limit themselves to surrounding us and continue their random bullshit.
“Baaaaaa! Baaaaaa! Baaaaaastard!”
“There’s a new menu today, and the main dish is you!”
The only thing I can do is turn around and ask Corp about what to do. But when I do so, I see him curled up on the ground.
“Please… leave me alone… not this again…”
Sigh… Sometimes, I wonder why I fell in love with him.
“Fufufu! Hahaha! Everything went according to the plan!”
I laugh, sprawled on a comfy chair, alone.
Right now I’m in the room I use to monitor the dungeon when another player invades, except I’m not in any dungeon instance right now, so the screens are black and the light is on.
I stroke the Octocat that’s resting on my armrest as I talk to myself.
“Look at all the visitors! It’s like… like… hundreds of times more than usual!? This is amazing! I’m going to swim in cp! My dungeon will reach the top ranks in no time! Fufufu! Hahaha!”
Well, maybe not the top ranks… but if I’m lucky, the top 10.000 wouldn’t be a stretch, would it? Yep, I think it’s perfectly doable.
For somebody of my level – which, by the way, doesn’t reach 10, the halfway point to the maximum level – this is something extremely rare. It wouldn’t be the first time it happened, but it isn’t common to see.
I remember that when the ‘Whac-A-Zombie’ went viral, that player’s dungeon got into the top 10… But that was an extreme case, and it fell off the ranks as quickly as it rose.
“Ain’t I amazing!? Fufufu! Hahaha! From now on, everyone will know about The Mad Rat’s Lab!”
It’s a shame the light is on and the screens are turned off because, otherwise, it’d be possible to see my amazing and epic laughing pose as a shadow on the wall right now.
‘Hey, Andreu. You know that everything is thanks to your sister’s fame, right? You didn’t earn this.’
“Shut up you fucking conscience! You have nothing to do here! Can’t you see I’m enjoying my success?”
For some reason or another, it always shows up at the worst time. Damn conscience, if only I could banish it away…
‘You’re a moron. You’ll never get rid of me. Fufufu! Hahaha!’
“Shut up I said!” I wait for a while, but only silence follows. “Where was I… Ah, yes. The epic laughing pose. Fufufu! Hahaha!”
I unconsciously rub my neck as I laugh.
It was hard asking for Marta’s agreement on the matter. I finally got her to agree, only because the damage was already done and it would sully her reputation if she refused, but I almost died there…
It shouldn’t be possible because I’m inside the game now but, somehow, I can still feel her grasp on my neck.
And Clara, my little sister, didn’t do anything to stop it! She stood there, behind Marta, laughing all the time!
‘Next time, you should ask for permission before you do something like that, you know?’
“Shut uuuuuup! Are you ever going to leave me alone!?”
‘Nope.’
“Urgh, this, this…”
No, no. Let’s calm down, Andreu. Let’s think about something else. Like… like those fools who’re currently invading your dungeon, hoping to win the prize!
“Let’s see, let’s see…”
I take a quick look at a few of the current dungeon instances. As I switch between them, the game displays the players in each one, on a screen in front of me. There are so many that it takes a lot of time to do.
How many instances is ‘a lot’, you ask? It’s hard to say because it depends on your point of view, but I can give you a general guide.
The bulk of the dungeons have about ten invasions each day. Most of those come from players who let the game choose the dungeon for them, or from the dungeon owner’s friends.
Then there are the good farming dungeons or the somewhat famous dungeons, which can get up to a hundred each day. Sure, a hundred seems like a lot, until you compare it with something like my sister’s dungeon, or those that appear in TV programs like M&Dx2, which get thousands each day.
And you’re right. There are barely any dungeons in between the two. You’re either extremely popular, or you’re irrelevant.
The Mad Rat’s Lab usually gets between twenty to forty invasions each day. It depends on the day of the week, and… I don’t want to think about them, but when the Mad Cultists do something is when I get the most invasions.
Do you think twenty is a low amount?
Then, I’m sorry to tell you this, my friend, but you’re wrong. For a player of my level, this amount of visits is abnormal.
“Let’s continue looking…” I keep taking a quick peek at the different dungeon instances, searching for something that catches my eye. “Hmm… how weird. I can’t see that orc player anywhere… I thought he would be the first one to come. What a shame. I guess he does have a life outside of the game after all.”
Sometimes, when I have nothing better to do and he’s inside my dungeon, I enter the dungeon instance to mess with him. His reactions and cries when he dies are so unique… he never fails to entertain me.
Yep. It’s extremely funny to ‘watch’ his invasions. Hahaha!
“Ah, look here. It’s Ricard and… who is that? It looks familiar.” I scratch my cheek in thought. “Hmm… where have I seen that girl before…? The elf that goes with them looks familiar too.”
Maybe it’s just my imagination? After peeking at so many players, everyone ends up looking the same.
“Ah, he’s acting all crazy… he’s in his ‘undead’ mode… And that girl is acting in a similar mode too…” I was thinking of going and saying hello. I changed my mind. “Let’s see what else we got here.”
I continue skimming through the list. I see a few faces I recognize, like Laura and Clara playing together, competing for who gets the most kills. It's the same as the elf and dwarf from a certain movie… if they talked about dates and who’ll play with me the next day.
“Ooooh, she even said the ‘This only counts as one’ phrase!”
There’s no way I’m getting involved in that, either.
“I don’t think there’s anything else to see–”
My brain stops working when I come upon a certain group of players. Players who I’ve only met once before, but the impact of that time was so enormous, I’ll never forget them. They’re also the players who’ve given me the largest amount of headaches.
“No, no, no, no, no, no, nooooooooooo….! Why are THEY here!? SHIIIIIIIIIIT! I forgot about them when I wrote the message in the forum…!”
Aaaargh, my head! It hurts as if it were to explode.
”Anyone. Literally, ANYONE! Don’t let them be the first to clear my dungeon, or it’ll be my undoing!” I shout, pulling the fur on my head. “Ricard, I’ll be your servant for life and listen to all your ramblings. Laura, I’ll go on a date with you. Clara, I’ll go into your dungeon as many times as you want.”
My voice fades off as all the previous enthusiasm turns into fear for what’s to come.
“Just, please… don’t let them be the first ones…”
“Maybe I should think things through before I take action. Just maybe.”
- Self-reflection made after it was too late.
“Come on, Ave… don’t be a wimp and follow me.”
Tired of waiting for him to make the first step, I grab his hand and pull. He resists, grabbing what remains of the smashed door with everything he has.
“B-but… can’t we go back? There’s no need to go inside, you know?” His eyes swim around, looking for an excuse, any excuse, to avoid this place. “We’ve already seen everything! I swear!”
I ignore him and continue pulling.
“Stop acting like this. It’s your job to guide me, so do it properly.”
“B-but, I…” He stutters. “I-I know, we can just take a peek and go back! Yes, let’s do this! Ahaha… you don’t need me, I’ll wait for you here.”
“Stop struggling already.”
Shit, I can’t pull him away from the door’s remains…
How can he resist me? I have the higher stats, it should be easy to do it! What’s going on? Does he have a skill that allows him to stick to walls or something!?
Seeing that I don’t want to change my mind, and sooner or later, I’ll manage to pry him away from the door, he decides to switch to another tactic.
In a final attempt to convince me, he grabs my hands and stares at my eyes, pleadingly.
“Please…?”
He makes the sweetest of the smiles. Oww, that’s playing dirty!
But work is work. Contrary to his expectations, I take this chance to drag him away. He made it a lot easier by releasing the door on its own.
“Let’s go,” I say, grabbing his hands too, so he can’t escape.
“Aaaah! No, not this again!” He struggles the best he can, but there’s nothing to grab anymore. This green-brown sticky substance makes it hard to grab the walls, and it isn’t possible to grab the stairs. “T-this is it! Once we finish this, we’re done! I’ll break up with you!”
I know he doesn’t mean it, so I ignore him and continue dragging him, descending the stairs. The light grows dimmer as we go, to the point that it’s hard to see anything at all.
It seems like, finally, I’m going to discover what he’s so afraid of. The curiosity was killing me! I was hoping to see it sooner…
Not that I was disappointed about the rest of the dungeon, though.
It was fun dealing with the turtle’s crossfire and the constant ambushes in the tunnels, I always appreciate a challenge.
The mushrooms which everyone hates weren’t dangerous to us because we came prepared with resistance skills. Corp, or Ave as he wants to be called now, is an elf with the Nature Attuned skill, and I created a new champion just for this. It was a little bit boring, so I might want to try it without the resistance skills at a later date, but we couldn’t risk dying and wasting time.
That giant worm that tried to eat me was a big surprise. Corp’s face when it happened was hilarious. He couldn’t believe it when I used Blink to escape. He’s still too green…
The rest was fine too. It was clear to me why the players both fear and enjoy this dungeon and why they keep coming back.
This is exactly what we’re looking for, a. The Mad Rat’s Lab will be a great option for our Mystical & Dangerous Monsters & Dungeons. It’s something different. Something unique but well-executed. But…
…it’s too early.
The low level of the player shows up everywhere. There are no real threats and the dungeon is too short. It’ll take time for it to reach its true potential, we’ll have to come at a later date again and see if it’s good enough by then.
“Oh, yes… thinking about it… weren’t people talking about Anthemia and this dungeon, before we came here…?” I heard it from our coworkers. “About meeting her in person if we’re the first to beat this dungeon, right?”
I ask Corp, who’s still trying to get free.
“Aaah, no. Please, anything but this!”
No use asking him, he’s not listening.
“If we’re lucky, we might have a chance to meet her. It’ll be a nice business opportunity… but our job comes first.” I shrug.
As soon as we reach the end of the stairs, Corp calms down and stops shouting. He moves behind me and grabs my shoulders, turning his head around in fear, his eyes wide open.
*Blip!*
“Aah!” Corp jumps when he hears a noise coming from the passage in front of us. He hides behind me, shaking. “I-it might b-b-be something else… y-yes. Something, e-else…”
Is this some kind of trap? Is this what he was so scared of?
“Finally!” I rub my hands together. “The mystery will be solved!”
Then, from the same direction as the noise, voices come to us.
“Bahahaha! I ate all your family, and you’ll be next!”
“Let’s beeeeeeee friends! Friends foreveeeeeer!”
What the hell’s going on? I didn’t have time to inspect the area, is trouble already on our way?
“No, no, no, no… Anything but this…”
My whole body starts shaking. It’s Corp, who’s trembling so much that it affects me too.
“Calm down,” I say, “I’m sure there’s nothing to be afraid.”
“...no, no, no… not this… not this…!”
Ok, I was curious before, but now I’m about to explode. What’s going on!? I want to know!
Soon after, I see movement. Monsters, they’re coming in our direction. It’s hard to see because of the lack of light, but they don’t seem to be taller than a meter.
“Don’t worry, Ave. I’ll protect you!” I stand ready for combat. A bunch of human-headed sheep are coming our way, spouting random phrases. “What the heck…!?”
I freeze. It’s the first time I've seen something like this, what’s going on?
Luckily for us, they don’t attack us. They limit themselves to surrounding us and continue their random bullshit.
“Baaaaaa! Baaaaaa! Baaaaaastard!”
“There’s a new menu today, and the main dish is you!”
The only thing I can do is turn around and ask Corp about what to do. But when I do so, I see him curled up on the ground.
“Please… leave me alone… not this again…”
Sigh… Sometimes, I wonder why I fell in love with him.
“Fufufu! Hahaha! Everything went according to the plan!”
I laugh, sprawled on a comfy chair, alone.
Right now I’m in the room I use to monitor the dungeon when another player invades, except I’m not in any dungeon instance right now, so the screens are black and the light is on.
I stroke the Octocat that’s resting on my armrest as I talk to myself.
“Look at all the visitors! It’s like… like… hundreds of times more than usual!? This is amazing! I’m going to swim in cp! My dungeon will reach the top ranks in no time! Fufufu! Hahaha!”
Well, maybe not the top ranks… but if I’m lucky, the top 10.000 wouldn’t be a stretch, would it? Yep, I think it’s perfectly doable.
For somebody of my level – which, by the way, doesn’t reach 10, the halfway point to the maximum level – this is something extremely rare. It wouldn’t be the first time it happened, but it isn’t common to see.
I remember that when the ‘Whac-A-Zombie’ went viral, that player’s dungeon got into the top 10… But that was an extreme case, and it fell off the ranks as quickly as it rose.
“Ain’t I amazing!? Fufufu! Hahaha! From now on, everyone will know about The Mad Rat’s Lab!”
It’s a shame the light is on and the screens are turned off because, otherwise, it’d be possible to see my amazing and epic laughing pose as a shadow on the wall right now.
‘Hey, Andreu. You know that everything is thanks to your sister’s fame, right? You didn’t earn this.’
“Shut up you fucking conscience! You have nothing to do here! Can’t you see I’m enjoying my success?”
For some reason or another, it always shows up at the worst time. Damn conscience, if only I could banish it away…
‘You’re a moron. You’ll never get rid of me. Fufufu! Hahaha!’
“Shut up I said!” I wait for a while, but only silence follows. “Where was I… Ah, yes. The epic laughing pose. Fufufu! Hahaha!”
I unconsciously rub my neck as I laugh.
It was hard asking for Marta’s agreement on the matter. I finally got her to agree, only because the damage was already done and it would sully her reputation if she refused, but I almost died there…
It shouldn’t be possible because I’m inside the game now but, somehow, I can still feel her grasp on my neck.
And Clara, my little sister, didn’t do anything to stop it! She stood there, behind Marta, laughing all the time!
‘Next time, you should ask for permission before you do something like that, you know?’
“Shut uuuuuup! Are you ever going to leave me alone!?”
‘Nope.’
“Urgh, this, this…”
No, no. Let’s calm down, Andreu. Let’s think about something else. Like… like those fools who’re currently invading your dungeon, hoping to win the prize!
“Let’s see, let’s see…”
I take a quick look at a few of the current dungeon instances. As I switch between them, the game displays the players in each one, on a screen in front of me. There are so many that it takes a lot of time to do.
How many instances is ‘a lot’, you ask? It’s hard to say because it depends on your point of view, but I can give you a general guide.
The bulk of the dungeons have about ten invasions each day. Most of those come from players who let the game choose the dungeon for them, or from the dungeon owner’s friends.
Then there are the good farming dungeons or the somewhat famous dungeons, which can get up to a hundred each day. Sure, a hundred seems like a lot, until you compare it with something like my sister’s dungeon, or those that appear in TV programs like M&Dx2, which get thousands each day.
And you’re right. There are barely any dungeons in between the two. You’re either extremely popular, or you’re irrelevant.
The Mad Rat’s Lab usually gets between twenty to forty invasions each day. It depends on the day of the week, and… I don’t want to think about them, but when the Mad Cultists do something is when I get the most invasions.
Do you think twenty is a low amount?
Then, I’m sorry to tell you this, my friend, but you’re wrong. For a player of my level, this amount of visits is abnormal.
“Let’s continue looking…” I keep taking a quick peek at the different dungeon instances, searching for something that catches my eye. “Hmm… how weird. I can’t see that orc player anywhere… I thought he would be the first one to come. What a shame. I guess he does have a life outside of the game after all.”
Sometimes, when I have nothing better to do and he’s inside my dungeon, I enter the dungeon instance to mess with him. His reactions and cries when he dies are so unique… he never fails to entertain me.
Yep. It’s extremely funny to ‘watch’ his invasions. Hahaha!
“Ah, look here. It’s Ricard and… who is that? It looks familiar.” I scratch my cheek in thought. “Hmm… where have I seen that girl before…? The elf that goes with them looks familiar too.”
Maybe it’s just my imagination? After peeking at so many players, everyone ends up looking the same.
“Ah, he’s acting all crazy… he’s in his ‘undead’ mode… And that girl is acting in a similar mode too…” I was thinking of going and saying hello. I changed my mind. “Let’s see what else we got here.”
I continue skimming through the list. I see a few faces I recognize, like Laura and Clara playing together, competing for who gets the most kills. It's the same as the elf and dwarf from a certain movie… if they talked about dates and who’ll play with me the next day.
“Ooooh, she even said the ‘This only counts as one’ phrase!”
There’s no way I’m getting involved in that, either.
“I don’t think there’s anything else to see–”
My brain stops working when I come upon a certain group of players. Players who I’ve only met once before, but the impact of that time was so enormous, I’ll never forget them. They’re also the players who’ve given me the largest amount of headaches.
“No, no, no, no, no, no, nooooooooooo….! Why are THEY here!? SHIIIIIIIIIIT! I forgot about them when I wrote the message in the forum…!”
Aaaargh, my head! It hurts as if it were to explode.
”Anyone. Literally, ANYONE! Don’t let them be the first to clear my dungeon, or it’ll be my undoing!” I shout, pulling the fur on my head. “Ricard, I’ll be your servant for life and listen to all your ramblings. Laura, I’ll go on a date with you. Clara, I’ll go into your dungeon as many times as you want.”
My voice fades off as all the previous enthusiasm turns into fear for what’s to come.
“Just, please… don’t let them be the first ones…”
“Maybe I should think things through before I take action. Just maybe.”
- Self-reflection made after it was too late.
