Garret’s laugh rang in Ryan’s ears. It wasn’t even overly loud or aggressive, just a little chuckle.
“Oh, sorry buddy,” Garret said. “You looked like a girl for a second with your costume like that.”
“No worries,” Dani replied.
She doesn’t seem upset, Ryan thought. I guess she was prepared for it to go like this.
“I’m going to the kitchen for a drink,” Ryan said, brushing past the couch.
He worried that staying by those people any longer would give him a stroke. Something about the way Garret was looking at him felt so…
Well he couldn’t pinpoint it but it was bad.
“Yeah I need one too,” Dani said and followed him.
She kept close to Ryan as he made his way to the kitchen, leaving no room for someone to pass in between them.
If she stays glued to me like this people are going to think… No, they’re already thinking that. The Uber driver thought it!
Ryan caught a few looks from the hordes of monsters, animals, and cartoon characters that filled the hall. He swore they were all staring at him.
What is everyone’s problem? We’re just going to the kitchen. It’s a party, why are they looking at me and not having fun?
After finally making their way through the masses, they arrived at the kitchen. It was mostly cleared out save for an elephant pouring himself a drink.
“Think you could make me something?” Dani asked. Her voice was soft and she sounded like a girl again.
“Yeah, if you don’t mind it being a surprise,” he said.
Ryan stepped next to the elephant guy and waited for him to be done making whatever concoction a pachyderm makes at a party. Meanwhile, Dani leaned against the counter and closed her eyes. Overwhelmed by all the people after a whole summer of never leaving the house, Ryan figured.
As the guy ahead of him finished putting together his drink, Ryan saw him give Dani a glance. A glance that lasted a little longer than it should have.
Is he trying to start something? What’s his problem?
He then looked at Ryan and gave an approving nod. With a smirk he tossed his trunk over his shoulder, took a swig from his cup, and left.
Oh. He thinks she’s my… That we’re… Yeah.
Ryan tried to focus on the pounding music while he fixed their drinks. Unfortunately, the kitchen was proving to be the quietest place on the ground floor.
He wasn’t sure why his thoughts were attacking him so much at the party. They had been in public together before, she had worn makeup before, he knew people might think they were a couple! Hell, he had even thought of the idea himself a few times!
Then what was his problem? Did seeing Garret cause a relapse in his views? No, he was getting anxious as soon as they left the Uber.
Had he just started liking Dani because of all his recent break ups? Was she just some rebound option who he didn’t really care for? Surely he deluded himself into being interested in her.
He could hear her humming along with the song remarkably out of tune. No, he really did think she was cute.
I just need to drink a little more and relax. It’s a party! I’m in my element. I’ll have a good time if I just loosen up a bit.
“Here ya go,” Ryan said, handing Dani a red plastic cup. “It’s just rum and coke.”
“Thanks!” Dani finally opened her eyes to accept her drink. “So what do you normally do at something like this anyway?”
Ryan smiled. It amazed him how different their two worlds were. “Well usually–”
“Hey! Ryan!” A familiar voice called from across the house. Elliot the pirate soon charged into the kitchen. “Come on, man! We need you in the basement! You’re my beer pong partner, remember?”
“I’ll be right there,” Ryan said. He turned to Dani and waved for her to follow.
Elliot led the way back through the masses of drunks, his large pirate hat making it easy to keep him in their sights. Dani followed closely behind Ryan. Really close. She was practically glued to his back.
Again, he normally would have had no problem with that, and maybe would have even liked it. He took a sip from his cup.
Just keep walking. Once we’re playing games everything will get better.
Still, it seemed that everyone they passed made it a point to look directly at him. He assumed he knew most of these people, though the costumes made it a little trickier to tell. But why were the looks they gave him so… Off?
Little half-smiles, condescending eyes. Was it because of Dani?
It has to be. They all think she’s a guy, so it’s throwing them off to see her so close to me. They know that I’m not– I’m not, right?
Elliot stopped when he got to the basement door, causing Ryan to stop and causing Dani to run into him.
“Oops!” She said. “Sorry.”
“Well if you didn’t stand so close you wouldn’t have gotten bumped,” Ryan said. His tone harsher than he expected.
Dani didn’t seem phased.
“Maybe I wanted to get bumped,” Dani said. She had a crafty smirk on her face and took a large swig from her cup. “It’s a party, you’re supposed to get close to each other, right?”
Ryan was lost. He wanted to apologize for sounding rude, he wanted to flirt back, he wanted to just move on, he wanted to go home, he wanted to drink.
Elliot looked at the both of them in silence.
He just heard that, didn’t he. Danny flirting with me in front of other people, why did he do that? Fuck, no, she. Goddammit!
To Ryan, the room burst into flames and he couldn’t stop sweating. To Ryan, the walls got closer and everyone was laughing at him. To Ryan, his dad’s voice echoed in his head, calling him a failure, a disgrace, a faggot.
“Hey, is everything alright?” Dani asked. She reached out and put her hand on his arm.
Ryan pushed it away.
“Can you just– Give me some space, okay?” Ryan said.
“Oh, sure.” Dani pulled back her hand and took another drink, this time her hand shaking.
“Sorry, it’s just–” Ryan started.
“No, I get it,” Dani said. “I’m being weird in front of people.” Ryan could tell she was holding back tears.
What am I doing, why am I saying any of this?
“I actually was meaning to say hi to some people I haven’t seen in a while,” Dani said while backing up, the lump in her throat getting more obvious with each word. “So I’ll catch up with you later, alright?”
“No come on,” Ryan said. “I wanted to hang out with you here, I didn’t mean to…” He trailed off as she vanished into the crowd.
***
Music blared and everyone continued to dance and drink, oblivious to whatever Dani was feeling. She was on her fourth or fifth drink of the night, whatever it took to distract her.
Since breaking off from Ryan and his friend, the past hour had been spent wandering around to different rooms, seeing if she could recognize anyone, with the occasional stop at the kitchen for a refill.
Nobody had looked familiar, yet. Originally she wanted to just go home, but something pulled at her, convincing her that she could still have a good night. Her naivete, surely.
She found a quieter spot by the back door to lean against while she replayed the situation in her head.
Why did I come to this? I knew it would suck.
Memories of the past few days came back to her. All the hope she had that it would be a fun date with Ryan. That he wouldn’t be ashamed to be seen with her.
Of course he’s ashamed. Why would anyone want to be seen with me in public? I’m some abomination.
Her cup felt lighter, as she looked down and realized she had let her hand get too relaxed and spilled some on the floor.
I’m such a mess. This isn’t for people like me. None of this should have happened.
She managed to find a towel on shelf nearby and wiped up her spilled drink. As she finished, she heard voices coming from the other side of the door.
Too drunk to bother being subtle, she swung open the door and poked her head outside. On the back patio a group of people were gathered in a circle, letting out occasional bursts of laughter. Their costumes all seemed a little basic to Dani. One was wearing nothing more than a normal shirt and jeans with a pinwheel hat on. Another had a name tag that said “Boo!” with an otherwise boring outfit.
Off to the side, sitting on the railing, Dani saw one nice costume. A girl with a black top hat, cape, and bow tie. There was even a wand sat next to her to complete the magician look.
Despite the clear effort, she was slouched over all by herself.
Wait, is that..?
Dani noticed the blonde hair and taller stature, despite the girl being seated. It was dark, Dani wasn’t all that composed, and there was the whole costume thing obscuring her. Still, the more she looked, the more she was sure.
The magician was Rachel.
They had just played cards together by candlelight less than a month ago.
She stared at nothing in particular while the huddled group kept on chatting away, not acknowledging her.
Maybe it was the drinks egging her on, or the fact that she had been on the verge of tears for over an hour straight, or even that she wanted to be more social and do something she thought a woman would normally do. Dani stepped outside.
Every inch closer she was more sure that she knew who the magician was. The group looked over at her once or twice but Rachel either didn’t hear her or didn’t care.
Dani picked up on the smell of weed.
That must be why they’re huddling. Passing around a joint or something.
While she did live a very sheltered upbringing, Dani did pick up on certain things through the wonders of public school. Though she had never smoked, Simon and Ryan did from time to time with friends, so she recognized it.
“Rachel?” Dani asked, finally at the railing.
Sure enough, the girl looked up and confirmed Dani’s hunch.
“Huh?” She asked. “Do I know– Wait, Danny?”
Garret’s laugh rang in Ryan’s ears. It wasn’t even overly loud or aggressive, just a little chuckle.
“Oh, sorry buddy,” Garret said. “You looked like a girl for a second with your costume like that.”
“No worries,” Dani replied.
She doesn’t seem upset, Ryan thought. I guess she was prepared for it to go like this.
“I’m going to the kitchen for a drink,” Ryan said, brushing past the couch.
He worried that staying by those people any longer would give him a stroke. Something about the way Garret was looking at him felt so…
Well he couldn’t pinpoint it but it was bad.
“Yeah I need one too,” Dani said and followed him.
She kept close to Ryan as he made his way to the kitchen, leaving no room for someone to pass in between them.
If she stays glued to me like this people are going to think… No, they’re already thinking that. The Uber driver thought it!
Ryan caught a few looks from the hordes of monsters, animals, and cartoon characters that filled the hall. He swore they were all staring at him.
What is everyone’s problem? We’re just going to the kitchen. It’s a party, why are they looking at me and not having fun?
After finally making their way through the masses, they arrived at the kitchen. It was mostly cleared out save for an elephant pouring himself a drink.
“Think you could make me something?” Dani asked. Her voice was soft and she sounded like a girl again.
“Yeah, if you don’t mind it being a surprise,” he said.
Ryan stepped next to the elephant guy and waited for him to be done making whatever concoction a pachyderm makes at a party. Meanwhile, Dani leaned against the counter and closed her eyes. Overwhelmed by all the people after a whole summer of never leaving the house, Ryan figured.
As the guy ahead of him finished putting together his drink, Ryan saw him give Dani a glance. A glance that lasted a little longer than it should have.
Is he trying to start something? What’s his problem?
He then looked at Ryan and gave an approving nod. With a smirk he tossed his trunk over his shoulder, took a swig from his cup, and left.
Oh. He thinks she’s my… That we’re… Yeah.
Ryan tried to focus on the pounding music while he fixed their drinks. Unfortunately, the kitchen was proving to be the quietest place on the ground floor.
He wasn’t sure why his thoughts were attacking him so much at the party. They had been in public together before, she had worn makeup before, he knew people might think they were a couple! Hell, he had even thought of the idea himself a few times!
Then what was his problem? Did seeing Garret cause a relapse in his views? No, he was getting anxious as soon as they left the Uber.
Had he just started liking Dani because of all his recent break ups? Was she just some rebound option who he didn’t really care for? Surely he deluded himself into being interested in her.
He could hear her humming along with the song remarkably out of tune. No, he really did think she was cute.
I just need to drink a little more and relax. It’s a party! I’m in my element. I’ll have a good time if I just loosen up a bit.
“Here ya go,” Ryan said, handing Dani a red plastic cup. “It’s just rum and coke.”
“Thanks!” Dani finally opened her eyes to accept her drink. “So what do you normally do at something like this anyway?”
Ryan smiled. It amazed him how different their two worlds were. “Well usually–”
“Hey! Ryan!” A familiar voice called from across the house. Elliot the pirate soon charged into the kitchen. “Come on, man! We need you in the basement! You’re my beer pong partner, remember?”
“I’ll be right there,” Ryan said. He turned to Dani and waved for her to follow.
Elliot led the way back through the masses of drunks, his large pirate hat making it easy to keep him in their sights. Dani followed closely behind Ryan. Really close. She was practically glued to his back.
Again, he normally would have had no problem with that, and maybe would have even liked it. He took a sip from his cup.
Just keep walking. Once we’re playing games everything will get better.
Still, it seemed that everyone they passed made it a point to look directly at him. He assumed he knew most of these people, though the costumes made it a little trickier to tell. But why were the looks they gave him so… Off?
Little half-smiles, condescending eyes. Was it because of Dani?
It has to be. They all think she’s a guy, so it’s throwing them off to see her so close to me. They know that I’m not– I’m not, right?
Elliot stopped when he got to the basement door, causing Ryan to stop and causing Dani to run into him.
“Oops!” She said. “Sorry.”
“Well if you didn’t stand so close you wouldn’t have gotten bumped,” Ryan said. His tone harsher than he expected.
Dani didn’t seem phased.
“Maybe I wanted to get bumped,” Dani said. She had a crafty smirk on her face and took a large swig from her cup. “It’s a party, you’re supposed to get close to each other, right?”
Ryan was lost. He wanted to apologize for sounding rude, he wanted to flirt back, he wanted to just move on, he wanted to go home, he wanted to drink.
Elliot looked at the both of them in silence.
He just heard that, didn’t he. Danny flirting with me in front of other people, why did he do that? Fuck, no, she. Goddammit!
To Ryan, the room burst into flames and he couldn’t stop sweating. To Ryan, the walls got closer and everyone was laughing at him. To Ryan, his dad’s voice echoed in his head, calling him a failure, a disgrace, a faggot.
“Hey, is everything alright?” Dani asked. She reached out and put her hand on his arm.
Ryan pushed it away.
“Can you just– Give me some space, okay?” Ryan said.
“Oh, sure.” Dani pulled back her hand and took another drink, this time her hand shaking.
“Sorry, it’s just–” Ryan started.
“No, I get it,” Dani said. “I’m being weird in front of people.” Ryan could tell she was holding back tears.
What am I doing, why am I saying any of this?
“I actually was meaning to say hi to some people I haven’t seen in a while,” Dani said while backing up, the lump in her throat getting more obvious with each word. “So I’ll catch up with you later, alright?”
“No come on,” Ryan said. “I wanted to hang out with you here, I didn’t mean to…” He trailed off as she vanished into the crowd.
***
Music blared and everyone continued to dance and drink, oblivious to whatever Dani was feeling. She was on her fourth or fifth drink of the night, whatever it took to distract her.
Since breaking off from Ryan and his friend, the past hour had been spent wandering around to different rooms, seeing if she could recognize anyone, with the occasional stop at the kitchen for a refill.
Nobody had looked familiar, yet. Originally she wanted to just go home, but something pulled at her, convincing her that she could still have a good night. Her naivete, surely.
She found a quieter spot by the back door to lean against while she replayed the situation in her head.
Why did I come to this? I knew it would suck.
Memories of the past few days came back to her. All the hope she had that it would be a fun date with Ryan. That he wouldn’t be ashamed to be seen with her.
Of course he’s ashamed. Why would anyone want to be seen with me in public? I’m some abomination.
Her cup felt lighter, as she looked down and realized she had let her hand get too relaxed and spilled some on the floor.
I’m such a mess. This isn’t for people like me. None of this should have happened.
She managed to find a towel on shelf nearby and wiped up her spilled drink. As she finished, she heard voices coming from the other side of the door.
Too drunk to bother being subtle, she swung open the door and poked her head outside. On the back patio a group of people were gathered in a circle, letting out occasional bursts of laughter. Their costumes all seemed a little basic to Dani. One was wearing nothing more than a normal shirt and jeans with a pinwheel hat on. Another had a name tag that said “Boo!” with an otherwise boring outfit.
Off to the side, sitting on the railing, Dani saw one nice costume. A girl with a black top hat, cape, and bow tie. There was even a wand sat next to her to complete the magician look.
Despite the clear effort, she was slouched over all by herself.
Wait, is that..?
Dani noticed the blonde hair and taller stature, despite the girl being seated. It was dark, Dani wasn’t all that composed, and there was the whole costume thing obscuring her. Still, the more she looked, the more she was sure.
The magician was Rachel.
They had just played cards together by candlelight less than a month ago.
She stared at nothing in particular while the huddled group kept on chatting away, not acknowledging her.
Maybe it was the drinks egging her on, or the fact that she had been on the verge of tears for over an hour straight, or even that she wanted to be more social and do something she thought a woman would normally do. Dani stepped outside.
Every inch closer she was more sure that she knew who the magician was. The group looked over at her once or twice but Rachel either didn’t hear her or didn’t care.
Dani picked up on the smell of weed.
That must be why they’re huddling. Passing around a joint or something.
While she did live a very sheltered upbringing, Dani did pick up on certain things through the wonders of public school. Though she had never smoked, Simon and Ryan did from time to time with friends, so she recognized it.
“Rachel?” Dani asked, finally at the railing.
Sure enough, the girl looked up and confirmed Dani’s hunch.
“Huh?” She asked. “Do I know– Wait, Danny?”
