The men talked loudly and cheered at the television. The women either found a spot in the dining room to talk together or were helping with dinner preparation. Everyone had a beer in their hand. It was a regular Thanksgiving as far as Ryan could tell.
A newer addition were the two toddlers that were constantly waddling between rooms and getting endless attention from his relatives. He himself had knelt down to speak with them, not that they were any good at talking yet. In all honesty he was happy to have some new faces at family gatherings. Since graduating he found it harder and harder to connect with the people he grew up with, even if they were his cousins.
Ryan found it unnerving how those who were the same age as him, once curious about the world, were now copies of his aunts and uncles. He found it more unnerving how it almost happened to him too.
There was one exception, though Ryan couldn’t remember if he had imagined it or not. One of his cousins, a girl only a year or two older than him, who he hadn’t seen at all over the past two decades of Thanksgivings and Christmases. He swore that she was a real cousin he had at some point. That she was always being scolded by her parents, or grandparents, or aunts and uncles, or even older cousins until one day she didn’t show up anymore.
Ryan did try asking his dad about it once, only to be met with a non-answer of a grunt and being told to not worry. He did as he was told and dropped the subject, chalking it up to a family friend that stopped by with an unruly daughter who stopped being invited.
Until he overheard a conversation from the dining room.
He was sitting in front of the tv with the rest of the men in his family when a few words echoed in from one of his aunts.
“...Hope neither of them end up like Heather.”
That was all it took. The football game he was invested in suddenly didn’t matter.
Heather… That was her name.
He downed the rest of his beer, giving him an excuse to walk to the kitchen. His dad didn’t even seem to notice.. As he passed through the dining room, the half-dozen ladies looked at him. Most were his aunts, or technically second cousins, though he didn’t really make the distinction between them. One of them was an outlier: Abby. She was his cousin and the mother of the two toddlers trampling through the house. She was also a year and a half younger than him, meaning everyone was getting impatient for Ryan to be the next to get married and have kids. He would have to navigate the conversation carefully to avoid that topic while still getting the information he wanted.
“Ah, is dinner almost ready?” He knew it was a question they would expect him to ask.
They all laughed amongst themselves, with some muttering of it being a “typical man” question.
It was his Aunt Steph, Abby’s mom, who actually answered. “About another twenty minutes, dear. You getting hungry?”
“A little bit, yeah,” he said. “Game’s getting boring too. Anything interesting happening in here?”
“Nothing you need to worry about,” his Aunt Mel said with a dismissive tone. She married into the family and was the mother to two of his male cousins. “Just girl talk. Unless you want to talk about raising kids.”
She and the rest of his aunts laughed, while Abby let out a half-hearted chuckle. It pained Ryan to see Abby agreeing with them. She got along with him and they had a lot in common just a few years ago.
Ryan decided to see how far he could push them, forgetting his fear of bringing up marriage. “You know, I do plan on having kids someday. It’s not like I would never do anything to take care of them.”
His Aunt Mel rolled her eyes. “Oh it’s just a little joke, relax. But you have to get married first, so don’t worry about it for now. You have another year or two before you have to settle down.”
He caught Abby frowning for a brief moment before she put her smile back on. The family had been talking to her about preparing for marriage as soon as she was sixteen, and pushed hard for it once she was nineteen without a husband.
Has my family always been this annoying? Or have I changed way more than I thought?
The conversation looked to be over, with anything Ryan could say getting dismissed. Giving up was tempting, as he wasn’t even sure if he heard what they said earlier correctly.
No, there was definitely a girl named Heather who I used to see here. And they mentioned her just a couple minutes ago. I need to figure this out now or I’ll go crazy.
In a last ditch attempt, he thought up the only way he knew to make sure the topic would come up. “So… How about Heather?”
He knew Dani would make fun of how bad his plan was if he ever told her about it. That she would have come up with the perfect way to get them to talk about the topic without being so blunt.
Oh well, at least this will get me the answers I want.
Nobody at the table looked surprised, though Steph looked annoyed and Abby set her gaze down to the floor.
“I know, we were just talking about that,” Aunt Mel said. “She has the nerve to cut everyone off, hell most of us are blocked on Facebook from even looking at her page! And after everything this family did for her, I swear, if she were my daughter I’d have–”
“Oh please,” Aunt Steph interrupted. Her eyes looked angrier than Ryan had ever seen them before. “You don’t know what it’s like raising a kid like that. Your sons aren’t perfect either, how can you talk? At least one of mine turned out good.”
So she really was my cousin. Or, is my cousin, I guess.
“Mom, please.” Abby grabbed on to Steph’s arm in a weak attempt to calm her down. “We shouldn’t be talking about her.”
Aunt Mel didn’t seem to enjoy the insult thrown her way. “Leave my boys out of this, at least they’re still around!”
“Years of private school to try and fix her,” Aunt Steph continued unfazed. “And as soon as she graduates she leaves without a word to go live with a lesbian.”
“Well, she is a lesbian,” Abby said, defeat apparent in her voice.
“You know that’s not true,” her mother continued. “She was raised in this family, I did everything the same with her as I did with you. There’s no way I raised a kid like that, it’s impossible. It was that woman who lured her away. It should be against the law to…”
Ryan tuned everything else out. An unprecedented amount of new information was being funneled into him at once. He knew his family had their fair share of secrets and assumed he knew most of them. But upon this new discovery, a rage built up inside him.
She’s Abby’s sister… And I somehow barely remember her. Aunt Steph sent her own daughter away for years for being gay? That can’t be right. I know they don’t like that kind of thing but we’re all still family, they wouldn’t really do that would they?
The question he asked himself was pointless. The answer was clearly in front of him.
But they aren’t acting like it’s a huge secret. Did everyone know this except me?
His rage turned toward his father. When he asked about Heather as a child he pretended she didn’t exist. He didn’t even seem torn up about erasing one of his family members from existence.
Would he have done the same to me if I was gay? Or trans, or anything he didn’t like?
On the other side of the house, his father was sitting and watching a football game in complete peace, and Ryan hated it. He felt nauseous at what he was realizing.
His family was lost. He couldn’t comprehend how he thought the same way as them a few years beforehand.
How did I even get saved from this? Was it all luck? Can any of them be saved with me?
The once fond feeling of family unity and connection that everyone in that house touted for his entire life became irreversibly soured. It was never about being family, it was about everyone living the way that was approved.
What’s even the point? Why bother pretending?
He wanted to say something drastic. Something that would explode the small argument into a family shattering feud. He might have done it if he didn’t get bumped by a couple of rampaging toddlers and realize the conversation had already moved on. While he was stuck in his head, they had turned it to a heated political rant they all agreed on but yelled out all the same.
Ryan left in silence to get another beer.
Announcement Read a full month ahead over on my Patreon~
The men talked loudly and cheered at the television. The women either found a spot in the dining room to talk together or were helping with dinner preparation. Everyone had a beer in their hand. It was a regular Thanksgiving as far as Ryan could tell.
A newer addition were the two toddlers that were constantly waddling between rooms and getting endless attention from his relatives. He himself had knelt down to speak with them, not that they were any good at talking yet. In all honesty he was happy to have some new faces at family gatherings. Since graduating he found it harder and harder to connect with the people he grew up with, even if they were his cousins.
Ryan found it unnerving how those who were the same age as him, once curious about the world, were now copies of his aunts and uncles. He found it more unnerving how it almost happened to him too.
There was one exception, though Ryan couldn’t remember if he had imagined it or not. One of his cousins, a girl only a year or two older than him, who he hadn’t seen at all over the past two decades of Thanksgivings and Christmases. He swore that she was a real cousin he had at some point. That she was always being scolded by her parents, or grandparents, or aunts and uncles, or even older cousins until one day she didn’t show up anymore.
Ryan did try asking his dad about it once, only to be met with a non-answer of a grunt and being told to not worry. He did as he was told and dropped the subject, chalking it up to a family friend that stopped by with an unruly daughter who stopped being invited.
Until he overheard a conversation from the dining room.
He was sitting in front of the tv with the rest of the men in his family when a few words echoed in from one of his aunts.
“...Hope neither of them end up like Heather.”
That was all it took. The football game he was invested in suddenly didn’t matter.
Heather… That was her name.
He downed the rest of his beer, giving him an excuse to walk to the kitchen. His dad didn’t even seem to notice.. As he passed through the dining room, the half-dozen ladies looked at him. Most were his aunts, or technically second cousins, though he didn’t really make the distinction between them. One of them was an outlier: Abby. She was his cousin and the mother of the two toddlers trampling through the house. She was also a year and a half younger than him, meaning everyone was getting impatient for Ryan to be the next to get married and have kids. He would have to navigate the conversation carefully to avoid that topic while still getting the information he wanted.
“Ah, is dinner almost ready?” He knew it was a question they would expect him to ask.
They all laughed amongst themselves, with some muttering of it being a “typical man” question.
It was his Aunt Steph, Abby’s mom, who actually answered. “About another twenty minutes, dear. You getting hungry?”
“A little bit, yeah,” he said. “Game’s getting boring too. Anything interesting happening in here?”
“Nothing you need to worry about,” his Aunt Mel said with a dismissive tone. She married into the family and was the mother to two of his male cousins. “Just girl talk. Unless you want to talk about raising kids.”
She and the rest of his aunts laughed, while Abby let out a half-hearted chuckle. It pained Ryan to see Abby agreeing with them. She got along with him and they had a lot in common just a few years ago.
Ryan decided to see how far he could push them, forgetting his fear of bringing up marriage. “You know, I do plan on having kids someday. It’s not like I would never do anything to take care of them.”
His Aunt Mel rolled her eyes. “Oh it’s just a little joke, relax. But you have to get married first, so don’t worry about it for now. You have another year or two before you have to settle down.”
He caught Abby frowning for a brief moment before she put her smile back on. The family had been talking to her about preparing for marriage as soon as she was sixteen, and pushed hard for it once she was nineteen without a husband.
Has my family always been this annoying? Or have I changed way more than I thought?
The conversation looked to be over, with anything Ryan could say getting dismissed. Giving up was tempting, as he wasn’t even sure if he heard what they said earlier correctly.
No, there was definitely a girl named Heather who I used to see here. And they mentioned her just a couple minutes ago. I need to figure this out now or I’ll go crazy.
In a last ditch attempt, he thought up the only way he knew to make sure the topic would come up. “So… How about Heather?”
He knew Dani would make fun of how bad his plan was if he ever told her about it. That she would have come up with the perfect way to get them to talk about the topic without being so blunt.
Oh well, at least this will get me the answers I want.
Nobody at the table looked surprised, though Steph looked annoyed and Abby set her gaze down to the floor.
“I know, we were just talking about that,” Aunt Mel said. “She has the nerve to cut everyone off, hell most of us are blocked on Facebook from even looking at her page! And after everything this family did for her, I swear, if she were my daughter I’d have–”
“Oh please,” Aunt Steph interrupted. Her eyes looked angrier than Ryan had ever seen them before. “You don’t know what it’s like raising a kid like that. Your sons aren’t perfect either, how can you talk? At least one of mine turned out good.”
So she really was my cousin. Or, is my cousin, I guess.
“Mom, please.” Abby grabbed on to Steph’s arm in a weak attempt to calm her down. “We shouldn’t be talking about her.”
Aunt Mel didn’t seem to enjoy the insult thrown her way. “Leave my boys out of this, at least they’re still around!”
“Years of private school to try and fix her,” Aunt Steph continued unfazed. “And as soon as she graduates she leaves without a word to go live with a lesbian.”
“Well, she is a lesbian,” Abby said, defeat apparent in her voice.
“You know that’s not true,” her mother continued. “She was raised in this family, I did everything the same with her as I did with you. There’s no way I raised a kid like that, it’s impossible. It was that woman who lured her away. It should be against the law to…”
Ryan tuned everything else out. An unprecedented amount of new information was being funneled into him at once. He knew his family had their fair share of secrets and assumed he knew most of them. But upon this new discovery, a rage built up inside him.
She’s Abby’s sister… And I somehow barely remember her. Aunt Steph sent her own daughter away for years for being gay? That can’t be right. I know they don’t like that kind of thing but we’re all still family, they wouldn’t really do that would they?
The question he asked himself was pointless. The answer was clearly in front of him.
But they aren’t acting like it’s a huge secret. Did everyone know this except me?
His rage turned toward his father. When he asked about Heather as a child he pretended she didn’t exist. He didn’t even seem torn up about erasing one of his family members from existence.
Would he have done the same to me if I was gay? Or trans, or anything he didn’t like?
On the other side of the house, his father was sitting and watching a football game in complete peace, and Ryan hated it. He felt nauseous at what he was realizing.
His family was lost. He couldn’t comprehend how he thought the same way as them a few years beforehand.
How did I even get saved from this? Was it all luck? Can any of them be saved with me?
The once fond feeling of family unity and connection that everyone in that house touted for his entire life became irreversibly soured. It was never about being family, it was about everyone living the way that was approved.
What’s even the point? Why bother pretending?
He wanted to say something drastic. Something that would explode the small argument into a family shattering feud. He might have done it if he didn’t get bumped by a couple of rampaging toddlers and realize the conversation had already moved on. While he was stuck in his head, they had turned it to a heated political rant they all agreed on but yelled out all the same.
Ryan left in silence to get another beer.
Announcement Read a full month ahead over on my Patreon~